Chapter Thirty-Four
Booker
“Sir, we are preparing to land, you need to buckle up.”
Bleary-eyed and feeling like he had the worst hangover, Booker blinked the air steward into focus, or at least tried. When had he fallen asleep? Last thing he remembered was working on his computer.
He grunted, rubbing at his tired eyes as his brain tried to work out which way was up. The last couple of weeks had been a blur juggling work, legalities, and Emmy’s needs. He reached clumsily for the seatbelt and snapped it into place, automatically looking at Frey and Emmy when they entered his thoughts. Which was—if he was honest—all the time, making it impossible to get through all the work he needed to do. Late nights had become his new norm.
Did he care?
One look at Frey and Emmy, and he found nothing else mattered, his heart had become invested with Frey… now he co uldn’t imagine a life without either the little girl or Frey in it.
His gaze softened on the pair sat on the seat next to him. Emmy was swaddled in a blanket and held close to Frey’s chest, one of his fingers between her lips. The sight made him want to sigh at how much of his heart belonged to them. Emmy was theirs. Fuck, it made him ache seeing them like this, knowing his luck came from Toby’s tragedy.
He shut out thoughts of things he couldn’t change and focused on what he could do now, for a little girl who didn’t like a pacifier. The chuckle felt good recalling how many shops he’d gone to hunting for the perfect pacifier. No matter how many Booker tried, all Emmy wanted was his or Frey’s finger.
The dark circles that looked like bruises under Frey’s eyes were testimony to this. Right now, his hair was a complete mess, with strands stuck up all over the place and he had baby spit-up on his shirt. He'd never looked more beautiful to Booker, but he got they needed a solution to the finger issue. He sighed half-heartedly at how much he loved it when she fell asleep sucking his finger, which came with a wallop of life-changing feelings whacking his chest. He was getting used to the intensity of them, mostly. Could he remember ever being this emotional about anyone or anything? No, and it scared him more than he would admit.
He's our mate, with our cub.
Don’t start with me.
I’m just saying—
You’re just saying nothing. We signed paperwork to make things legal with Emmy .
Booker snapped his teeth together and straightened up, doing what he could to stop staring at the picture Frey and Emmy made, snuggled as they were. He found he could stare at them for hours, which wasn’t productive at all. His gaze lingered on Frey’s unmarked neck, his gums aching with thoughts of…
Get out of my head.
Impossible, and paperwork means nothing to an unclaimed mate.
A growl rumbled up from his chest when it was getting impossible not to agree with what his bear wanted. To claim Frey as theirs and make them a genuine family. His bear had started nagging. This was all part of it, getting into his thoughts and changing their direction.
This wasn’t me. It was you.
The arguing was a daily thing. Booker rolled his eyes and didn’t bother answering. This behavior usually came when he was on his knees, tired. Late nights with a baby who needed feeding, when they were all sleeping in the same bed together. It was driving him to distraction.
They had a legal agreement. It was enough for now…
Keep dreaming.
The jet hit an air pocket and Frey started awake. His gaze went straight to the bundle he held before he glanced at Booker. “Is everything okay?” he asked groggily.
“We’re coming into land.” He wanted to fuss, to get up and check they were both secure. To check the baby seatbelt they’d had to special order for the plane to attach to Frey’s or Booker’s. He’d checked it twice while Frey was asleep, it still wasn’t enough for his protective urges. Emmy had had an awful, fussy night and as neither he nor Frey could place Emmy in her crib and leave her there crying, she’d stayed in the bed with them. It broke both their hearts to hear her crying. He’d read up on the do’s and don’ts, and both he and Frey were failing on so many. Babies in bed were a definite no.
They let Emmy rule their lives.
Was it wrong?
Possibly?
Did they care?
No.
His life was now in two parts, before Emmy and after. Everything in his world now revolved around the two people in the seat next to him and he didn’t want to change a thing.
“Are you sure it’s going to be alright with me moving temporarily into your home?”
Booker could easily see Frey’s concerns, with his puckered brow and wary stare. They’d discussed it. His place wasn’t going to be big enough for all the things a baby would need. Then there was childcare while they figured out Emmy’s daily routine, or that’s what the book he’d bought said.
“We’re going to have a house meeting and discuss everything this evening when we get there. It will all be fine, you’ll see.” Booker fucking hoped so after he’d read the alphahole chat at two this morning. His brothers would stand by his decision one hundred percent. Helping him… that was still debatable .
Frey got a look that suggested he knew about the family gathering. “Lane invited all the PAs as well, to do a rota to look after Emmy.”
“He said that? When?”
Frey blushed prettily. “In our group chat yesterday.”
“Oh.” Booker had spoken with Popi, and he and Dad had offered for them all to move into the house because it had the space they’d need for now. There were also folks there to help with things like the… dirty diapers . Booker continued to retch every time he did one. It was lowering when Frey managed without a problem. So he was going to inflict that torment on his brothers.
He chuckled at the very idea.
“You’re planning something,” Frey said, shifting as the plane thumped onto the tarmac and taxied down the runway.
Booker grinned, all teeth. “I don’t know what you mean.”
Frey shook his head, smiling. “You do, but it’s fine. I’m too tired to argue.”
His concern for Frey removed the humor all too quickly. “Popi has offered to have her tonight so we can get some uninterrupted sleep.”
Frey’s frown returned. “I…” Frey glanced at Emmy. “We’ll see.”
Booker got it; he did. The need to have Emmy close. Did a parent ever lose that feeling? Booker had no answer, like most of the time. This was all so new, yet on the other hand, it was like he’d never been without Frey or Emmy by his side .
He remained quiet, packing up his things, ready to disembark the jet.
In the waiting car, the driver had strapped the car seat they’d purchased into the back. Emmy didn’t stir as Frey got her into the seat and settled right next to it, finally freeing his chapped finger.
The silence between them continued and Booker chewed the inside of his cheek, debating with himself whether to talk about the bedroom situation. On the top floor of his parents' home were two conjoined rooms, usually reserved for guests. In the hotel, they’d had no option but to sleep in the same bed, with everything so new with Emmy. Would it be different now they would have help?
He hated the idea of not having Frey snuggling in bed with him. Sex was there, in the back of his thoughts, but he needed Frey to make the move, to show he was ready after what he’d been through. Also, having an infant in your bed was the most tiring thing in the world.
When the car drove up the drive to the house, Booker stared out the window at all the cars in the driveway. Shit, Frey wasn’t kidding, all the PAs were there.
Emmy chose then to wake up. Not having Frey’s finger in her mouth, she immediately started to cry. She was happy to reveal her lungs were in great working order with her piercing cries. They stopped the second she caught sight of Frey as he popped his head over the car seat.
“Popi’s here, Emmy.” At the sound of his voice, the tears stopped, and she gave him a gummy smile. It wasn’t wind, not at all .
“Did you see that? She smiled at me!”
“You’re a miracle worker.” Booker released his seatbelt and Frey’s, who seemed to forget he also had a seatbelt on while he struggled to get close enough to lift Emmy out so he could carry her into the house. He didn’t even consider leaving her in the car’s travel seat. His preferred method was in his arms. Online, Booker had found a wraparound baby sling with a rainbow pattern on it, and had it delivered to Popi while they were away. He wanted to surprise Frey with it. He could then do stuff with Emmy strapped to him… like peeing.
The car door burst open and Popi’s head peered in. “Oh my,” he hiccup-sobbed. “Please, let me have a hold of my grandbaby.”
“Erm…”
Popi looked expectantly at them both, his hands fluttering at his sides.
“I’m sure Frey would like to be the first one to carry our sweet girl into the house. Like an introductory kind of thing,” Booker murmured softly, not wanting to upset Popi but also understanding that Frey was a little anxious about letting Emmy go, right this second.
Frey’s body sagged against the seat, almost appearing conflicted.
“Of course.”
Popi didn’t get a chance to move back to give them room before Frey spoke, “You could hold her while I get out of the car, if you like? ”
Popi beamed as though Frey had offered him the world, and smoothly transferred the baby into his arms with such effortless ease.
Booker’s jaw hung open at the fluid move that he and Frey had yet to manage.
“Aren’t you just the most adorable, beautiful girl?” Popi nuzzled Emmy’s cheek, making her squeal in delight.
Frey fidgeted on the seat, looking a little forlorn. Booker rubbed a hand over Frey’s shoulder, squeezing gently. “It’s hard, I know, but you made Popi’s day. Heck, his month, possibly his year. He’ll love her as much as us,” he murmured quietly, knowing it to be the truth. He’d experienced that love and it changed a person for the good.
A loud sniff and a quick dash with the back of his hand over his eyes, and Frey looked at him. “I know… it’s… just…”
“She’s our baby girl and sharing the joy is hard when it’s so new?” Booker finished for him, getting it.
Another sniff and Frey came closer and pressed his forehead against Booker’s chest and released a shuddery breath, his arms going around Booker’s middle in an awkward hug. “She’s just so precious.”
He kissed the top of Frey’s talcum powder scented hair. “It’s gonna be fine. I swear it.”
“Are you two coming in or just gonna sit there all day?” asked Silas, his gaze meeting Booker’s over the top of Frey’s head as he took Popi’s place.
Booker could easily see the silent question in Silas’ eyes, asking if they were okay without saying it out loud. The night they’d gone for a beer, they’d avoided talking about Ziggy, so things at times were still awkward. Booker kind of expected it after so long of not speaking openly about what had gone on between them.
He nodded and gave him a cheeky grin. “You gonna be the first to offer to babysit, bro?”
“Fuck off, I’d rather—”
“Silas.” The way Dad spoke his name stopped whatever else Silas was about to say, and Booker’s smile widened.
Frey wiggled out of Booker’s arms and climbed past the car seat. He stood looking up at Dad with a somber expression. It was so different from what Booker was used to, he scrambled to get out of the car.
Frey offered his hand. “I want to thank you for the offer to let us stay until we get something else sorted.”
Booker watched Dad ignore Frey’s hand and pull him in for a hug, getting a startled squeal from the man he held. “Welcome to the family.”
It was hard to dislodge the lump in his throat, and Booker had to look away for a second to collect himself. Silas slapped him on the back hard enough to make Booker stagger forward. He side eyed his brother. “What you do that for?”
“Stop you going all teary-eyed. One sap in the family is enough.”
“Huh… Taylin?”
“Who did you think I meant?” Silas questioned, frowning at him.
Booker shrugged, feeling a little too warm for comfort when he spotted Kari standing in the doorway with Bowie. “I’m sleep deprived. I don’t know what I mean anymore. ”
Silas’s eyes narrowed, then he grinned. “That’s what happens with a baby.” He glanced at Kari and pointed a finger. “I remember when he and Kodi tag teamed Dad and Popi, one crying, then one would stop and the other would start.”
“Memorable moments that you treasure when they grow up,” Dad murmured, letting go of Frey who looked a tad shellshocked. “And become a complete pain in your ass.”
“Hey,” Silas said in outrage.
Kari’s brows drew together, and he stood a little straighter. “What, a pain in your ass? Never!”
Dad’s lips twitched as he winked at Booker. “If the shoe fits…”
“He’s joking.” Not sounding convinced, Silas following Dad into the house after a disappearing Kari.
Bowie hung by the doorway, staring at Frey like he wanted to talk to him. Placing a hand on Frey’s lower back, Booker guided him to the door. “I think someone wants to talk to you.” He kissed the top of Frey’s head and wandered inside, leaving Frey and Bowie alone.
He followed the sound of voices into the dining room. Only the table was gone and in its place were lots of chairs. By the wall at the far end was a flip chart on a stand.
Oh gods! His eyes widened.
Shit, Frey was right. Popi had indeed drawn up a rota for Emmy. He glanced back out the doorway, unsure whether to laugh or hide from Frey. It was a close call with an interfering Popi who always got his own way.
You’ll get more time alone with Frey when you aren’t tired, his bear pointed out gleefully.
Booker glanced back at the flip chart… that was true!