32. Diablos
Chapter thirty-two
Diablos
“Do you want to get some sleep now?” Dagon asked once we were back at the cabin.
“No, I’m not that sleepy anymore. There’s nothing like a how-we-will-kill-demons morning talk to wake you up.”
I chuckled because it was true, but Dagon didn't laugh. He just wrapped his arms around me.
“I’m sorry, love.”
“Hey, I was joking. Kind of,” I mumbled into his chest and sighed into the comfort, “It didn’t bother me, Dagon. There’s nothing you should apologize for.”
He nodded, but I wasn’t convinced he believed me.
Changing the subject, he asked me, “What would you like to do today?”
“Hmm… food, a nap, shower, couch cuddles with my man and a book, and a walk in the woods tonight?”
“I like the way you think.”
The sparkle in Dagon’s eyes made me think he'd already planned something. I was all in for a surprise.
I just wanted to spend the day with him, doing mundane things that would help us relax, stay grounded, be here. Now.
For the first time in my life, I was adamant that I would stay in the present and not worry about future worries and obstacles.
We had today.
That was all that mattered.
We were already back in the cabin when Dagon took my hand and led me to the couch.
“Before we do anything else, there’s something I need to tell you.”
Dagon looked nervous, and I started fidgeting with my ring. So much for not worrying.
“Hey,” Dagon murmured, taking my hands in his, “look at me, sweetheart.”
I did. And my breath caught.
The unconditional love in his eyes, the happiness in the gray swirling with purple, coupled with the adoration, took my breath away. But behind the affection, I caught a flicker of something else.
Fear and uncertainty.
I leaned in and gave him a soft kiss. Then nodded, letting him know I was okay.
Dagon took a deep breath… and then blurted, “You’re my mate. Fuck, wait. This wasn’t right. No! It was right. You’re my mate. Hell, this wasn’t how I was going to tell you.”
Mate.
The word didn't surprise me. That was the thing.
It should have. By every reasonable measure, mate should have been a shock – an unfamiliar piece of demon vocabulary I would need to be talked through. But the word didn't land like new information. It landed like a name I had already been waiting to hear.
That fire I'd felt in my chest after the demon reveal. The way our first kiss in the abandoned town had felt like home. The two strings finding the same note. The whisper my soul had been doing for days while my mind insisted I didn't have language for it.
This was the language.
This was what my body had been saying all along.
Pressing my lips together, I did my best. I tried! Still, a smile broke on my lips. For the first time in all the years I'd known him, Dagon was… flustered.
His brows furrowed, but I couldn’t stop smiling. He was cute as fuck. Not that I was going to say it out loud. Still, my smile faded the second I saw the worry lingering in his eyes.
I had no idea what "mate" truly meant in demon terms, but I knew he'd explain. And strangely, I wasn't worried.
“What does a mate mean?” I asked.
Sure, I’d read enough fated mate books to guess, but I didn’t want to assume.
“Only the most powerful demons have mates," he said. "Usually, Starborns, sometimes Nightborns. But being powerful doesn't guarantee one.”
Dagon looked at me with awe that curled around my heart and squeezed.
“A mate is sort of like the human’s version of a soulmate. Our souls recognize each other. We were always meant to find one another. Always.”
We were destined for each other?
It felt too big for words. Too big for me.
And yet… some part of me had always known.
“When… when did you know?”
His body tensed before he answered.
“In the hospital. When I saw your blood, smelled it…
I knew." He shook his head slowly. "I should've known the second I saw you in our kitchen for the first time. But my powers were still suppressed. That was the only reason I didn’t know sooner. I guess when I saw your blood, the bond came to the surface and I was able to sense it even with my suppressed powers.”
His words sank in slowly.
I remembered that time. Vividly.
The frantic way he had run into my room. The way his eyes had locked on the blood on my hand and the many emotions that started playing in his eyes. The way he had bent over my hand and pressed his forehead to my knuckles. The way I had felt his tears soak into the bandage at my wrist.
The whisper. The one I never heard. The one I had carried for eight years and yearned to have heard.
He had been saying Mate.
My breath caught.
He hadn't been crying just because I was hurt.
He had been crying because he had just recognized me – and I was bleeding, and broken, and unreachable in a bed he wasn't allowed to climb into.
The most terrible and most ecstatic moment of his life had collided in one room.
And then King had pulled him outside a week later, and Dagon had walked away with his soul still tethered to mine, feeling destroyed by it, and I had spent the next eight years trying to figure out what I had done wrong.
Fuck.
My eyes burned.
Dagon had been beside himself with worry, even more than usual. Even though I kept assuring him I was okay. He never left my side. There'd been something in his eyes, not just fear, but joy. He never left me, he was never going to leave me if it wasn't for King.
I may not know what mates mean exactly, but some parts of me feels the connection. To know Dagon spent all those years away from me, in pain and struggling alone… I hated it.
I launched myself into Dagon's arms, burying my head in his neck. I felt the prickle of tears and tried to blink them back.
“You’re not angry?” he asked.
I pulled away sharply, “Why the fuck would I be angry?”
“Because I didn’t tell you. Because I stayed away. Mates aren't supposed to do that, but I did. Because I’m fucking selfish, and I'll never let you go again. Because-”
I kissed him, silencing the spiral.
I licked his lower lip, tasted him. When his tongue tangled with mine, I took control of the kiss. More often than not, Dagon was in control. Now, I had to show him I wouldn’t allow him to blame himself.
The kiss consumed me, like always.
His hands moved over my chest, my neck. It felt like they were caressing my soul. Our teeth clashed, and I bit his lower lip, eliciting a growl from him before I slowed the kiss to a tender exploration.
When I was satisfied that he was thoroughly kissed, for now, I pulled back and cupped his face.
“Do not dare blame yourself. King should have never said what he did. It was hard for both of us. Probably worse for you. So stop blaming yourself. I’ll remind you every single day for the rest of my life if that’s what it takes. I love you. And what matters is that we’re together now.”
“I love you,” he whispered.
The reverence and intensity of how he spoke those words wrapped around every ragged part of me, soothing the pain that still cut me deep.
I curled beside him on the couch, and once he relaxed again, I asked, “Tell me more. What does it mean… being your mate?”
My heart fluttered when I asked this question. Maybe because I was trying my best not to get excited with meanings from fantasy books I’d read. My brain was running rampant in a good way.
“What are you thinking about?" he asked, amused. "You've got that dreamy look.”
“Books.”
“You’re thinking about books?” Dagon tried to hide his amusements. Unsuccessfully. I shoved him, and he raised his hands in surrender.
“Well, you can’t tell a bookworm they’re your mate and expect their soul not to melt and their mind not to run wild from all they know about mates.”
“Oh, this is gonna be so good.”
“What?”
“Tell me what you know about mates.”
I narrowed my eyes, “I know book things! Not real life mates things. You’re the expert here.” I raised one finger, “Only once.”
“Only once what?”
“I’m the always expert, you’re the only-in-this-case expert on fated mates.”
“Hell, I love you so much.” He lunged again, kissing my nose and cheeks and trying to tickle me.
“Stooop. I surrender.”
“You do, huh? What’s my reward?”
“I won’t kick you off the bed tonight?”
He sprang off me so fast I nearly lost it laughing.
“That was mean.”
“Did it work? It did.”
“Demons don’t influence you well,” he joked.
“Nah, you, my demon, influence me perfectly.”
He smiled, and we settled back, this time focusing on our main conversation.
“So, mates are fated," he began. "But just because they’re fated doesn’t mean one or both can’t reject the bond.”
“The bond?” I asked since the word caught my attention.
“Yes. There always was and always will be a bond between us. It connects both of us and-” he hesitated. Still, after a silent conversation with himself and a nod, he said, “And if we complete the bond, then nothing would ever be able to tear us apart.”
“What do we need to complete it?”
I could see the question surprised him. But seriously? In what world did he think I would not want to complete it? It's not every day you learn you have a fated mate.
It’s not every day I learn Dagon is my fated mate.
“There’s a ritual," he said. "But when we complete it… you'll become a demon, Di."
My eyes widened.
Me? A demon?
“Demons are immortal," he continued. "We stop aging at thirty. When we bond, you’ll become a demon and stop aging too. And you'd gain some of my powers.”
Wow, this was so much like some of the books I’d read.
He glanced at me, cautious. “We can wait. If you don’t want to be a demon, I'd still love you. Nothing would change that.”
“Stop. Of course, I want to complete our bond. Are you kidding me? This is like a book!”
“Oh, so you want to do it because it’s like a book?” Dagon smirked.
“Asshole,” I muttered, shoving him, but he only chuckled and wrapped me in a hug with a big smile on his face. “Of course, I want to complete it because I love you, Dagon.”
Kissing my forehead, he said, “Thank you.”
“So when are we doing it?”
Chuckling again, he stared at me, his expression sobering, “I want to give you time. I want you to think about it and be certain when we do it. We have time.”
But we don’t, a voice whispered in my mind. I tried to chase it away, but it wasn’t budging.
I didn’t need time, and I knew what I wanted.
Dagon.
He was all I wanted. All that I needed.
However, I felt his determination pouring in waves around us. He wanted to give me time to make my decision. Sure, most would waver in the face of this question. Staying human, living my life as a human, or becoming a demon wasn’t a question I thought I would ever be asked.
Lucky for me, I was a bookworm.
And every bookworm placed themselves in the main character’s position and dreamed of what they would do. It wasn’t only me, right?
I knew what I wanted. Now, I needed to convince Dagon he was everything to me. Human or demon, hell, even an alien, it wouldn’t matter.
I love my demon, and there was nothing I wouldn’t do for him.