Chapter 59 #2
I don’t want to have this conversation.
Not with him. Not with any of them.
“Yes or no. Don’t overthink it.”
“Yes?” I guess. That’s exactly what it is: a guess.
I haven’t spent a lot of time considering my future.
It was so bleak for so long. Then, over the last few months, I’ve been focused on myself.
On now. On starting fresh. On doing well in my gen ed classes.
On picking a major. I thought all I had to worry about this week was registering for classes.
Family planning was not on my bingo card.
“I do not. So it’s settled.”
“So that’s it?” I snap, jumping to my feet. “You and I have no future because you’re forcing me to decide in an instant whether I want kids someday?”
Kylian rises, too. Much slower, methodically. He approaches with measured steps, and when he’s close, he pulls me closer. He grips both my wrists with one hand, while the other finds my chin.
He bows low, his mouth close enough to kiss. He doesn’t follow through. Instead, he brushes his lips past mine as he whispers, “I can’t wait to fuck the sass right out of this mouth later.”
He kisses me hard then, a vow and a promise. I shiver on contact. He pulls away too soon, leaving me breathless and wanting.
“In the state of North Carolina, if a married woman becomes pregnant, the paternity of the child defaults to the husband both biologically and legally.” He recites the law from memory.
I don’t bother questioning him. For as ridiculous as it sounds, I’m sure it’s correct.
“You want kids,” he states. “Among the group, I’m sure there is another person who would like to procreate. I do not want to have children.”
My stomach drops at the thought. His declaration was not only surefire, but it comes with many implications.
“Correction.” He clears his throat. “I will tolerate and maybe even like your offspring. I like all of you, so statistically, that is likely. I will also participate in the agreed-upon parenting system when and if the time comes, but I do not want to contribute DNA and make children.”
“I don’t either,” K declares.
I swivel, resting one hand on the table for balance, and take him in. His expression is pensive—low brows, firm jaw—but sure.
“Lupus is genetic. I want babies, but I always assumed I’d adopt.”
How the hell did we go from the promise of strip poker to a full-blown family planning discussion? As my mind whirls, I cast my gaze to the ceiling and blow out a long, steady breath.
“Locke? What’s your stance on kids?” Decker asks.
He glares at Decker—always on my side—then turns to me, the lines on his face smoothing out. “We’ve already talked about this. Joey knows where I stand.”
I offer him a soft nod, confirming. Although when we talked about our future, I thought we were talking about the actual future. Sometime in the very distant future.
The room goes quiet once again as my ego battles with my heart.
I haven’t had a chance to process any of this, to let the ideas simmer or to give myself grace to navigate what comes next.
But there’s an urgency to the energy tonight.
Maybe it’s because the clock is ticking down on our time-out.
Or maybe it’s because this is the right call, landing in my lap at exactly the right time. Maybe the universe is nudging me so hard I’d be stupid not to listen.
I bend at the waist, gently drop a kiss to Nicky’s cheek, murmur “I love you,” and walk toward my fate.
Circling the table, I home in on Decker.
His eyes are dark, guarded, as he watches me approach.
“If we do this,” I proclaim. “If I say yes to you, I’m actually saying yes to them.”
He nods his acceptance. I refuse to make this easy for him, though.
“I’ll marry you. I’ll be your wife.” I tamp down the unease rising inside me. “But in name only. Is that really what you want, Cap?”
He watches me, unblinking. Then he glances at each of the guys. “I want to make this right. I played it wrong for too long. If this is how I can fix it, for all of us, then yes, this is what I want.”
“I’m not giving them up.” I raise a brow to emphasize my point. “I’m not changing a single thing to cater to you. I’m not even sure I’ll ever grow to trust you or let you in.”
He swallows and exhales, stoic as ever. “I understand.”
“You’ll have no agency over me. I don’t even want to hear your opinion unless I ask for it. Your influence ended the morning you broke up with me. Getting married doesn’t change that. Is that clear?”
He glares but nods his ascent.
“Tomorrow,” Kylian suggests. “You should do it tomorrow.”
The words are like a sucker punch. Rearing back, I gape at him, suddenly panicked by just how final this is about to be.
“Why tomorrow?” I ask when I can breathe again.
“No cameras. No press. We’ll catch them unaware. You can do it here.”
Kendrick sits back and crosses his arms. “It’s not a bad idea. I don’t see any other way we can pull this off without tipping off the media. They’ll find out soon enough, but it will be on our terms. I assume there’s more to the plan, Cap?”
Decker nods once. “I’m breaking ties with my dad. Purposely in breach of contract with most of my NIL deals. I’m getting out, but it’s going to be messy. There will be consequences, but I’ll face them.”
“We’ll face them,” Kendrick clarifies.
“Tomorrow, huh?” Locke runs his hand through his hair.
“Is everyone okay with that?” Decker asks.
The guys grumble their consent, the mood in the room noticeably sour.
“Josephine?”
Arms crossed, I prop a hip against the table.
Waves of warning crash over me, even though there’s no danger here.
The instinct to oppose the situation is purely self-preservation.
If I do this, when I do this, I have to protect my heart.
So I press my lips into a flat line, doing my best to look unaffected at the prospect of marrying Decker Crusade. “I honestly don’t care.”
“Josephine,” he mutters. This time my name is a scolding. He links his massive arms across his broad chest, mirroring my stance.
And just like that, we’re locked in a face-off once again.
“What?” The unease inside me is quickly turning to agitation.
Decker wasn’t even supposed to be around this weekend. Tonight was turning out to be chill, enjoyable, with the possibility of turning molten. Weren’t we supposed to play strip poker? What happened to the damn time-out?
“Have you decided my opinion suddenly matters? Just like that, you’ve determined my words and actions have the power to change something you’ve already decided for me?”
“Easy,” Kendrick chides.
His placating tone only raises my hackles more.
“No. I’ll go through with this, but nothing about it will be easy.” I’m not even mad at K, and yet I can’t help but scowl in his direction. I’m out of my depth. Out of control. Panicking at the prospect of marrying—marrying?—Decker tomorrow. This can’t be happening.
“Cap’s made it clear where he draws the line with me. That doesn’t mean I have to settle, though. Even if he is going to be my husband.” The last word leaves my mouth like a bitter curse.
Never one to back down when challenged, Decker straightens to full height, rolling his shoulders back.
Gone is the remorseful, pitiful man who was stammering through his supper twenty minutes ago.
Before me stands the arrogant, egotistical asshole quarterback who broke my heart, then stomped on the pieces.
Holding his head high, he scans the room. “Guys. Can you give us a few minutes? I’d like to speak to my wife. Alone.”
No one moves a muscle.
I also refuse to back down from his challenge, so I look from Kylian to Kendrick to Locke. “Go,” I tell them. “I’ll be fine,” I promise when I note the concern in Locke’s expression.
Planting one hand on my hip, I turn back to Decker. “Clearly, my future husband isn’t going to settle until he gets his way. Once I deal with him, I’ll meet you in the Den.”