21. Chapter Twenty-one
Chapter Twenty-one
Blue
My skin itches wanting to get back to her. But instead, under Clay’s supervision, I had to drive away.
I wasn’t lying about needing to swing by the livestock auction yard. It’s standard practice that I have to go and double check brands, especially with the rash of cattle theft in the last few years.
But not having to unload these girls is the best feeling.
I can be Libby’s hero, and that makes a spot deep in my chest warm up with an unfamiliar sensation.
It’s like a low frequency current is rippling through my limbs as I go through the motions of my job.
She’s distracting in the best way. Knowing I’m going to get to see her in just a few hours makes me want to rush.
Until I fuck up on a form twice. I gotta slow down and get my shit right.
This just feels like an inconvenience, keeping me from her.
So when I’m back on the road heading to Black Gulch, it’s as if a weight has been lifted .
I don’t remember ever feeling this…giddy before.
Driving down the long dirt lane leading to the main ranch house, it’s impossible to wipe the stupid ass grin off my face. There’s enough snow melted off I can turn around easily and back the trailer up to the entrance of the barn.
“Look, Paisley. It’s Millie!” Char points at the dark dun Jersey that steps out first.
As if she knows her name, the old cow ambles towards the fence where Char and her daughter are standing.
The rest of the small herd mill against the far end, a little more wary in the new space.
“Millie, moo!” Paisley claps her hands, jumping up and down.
They all startle when I close up the doors to the trailer.
“You can use that alfalfa.” Char nods to the pile in the corner. “I had Dixon put it there for Libby.” She rubs her extended abdomen. “I’m not allowed to lift anything heavy, or I’d help.” Her mouth droops into a frown.
“I’d say twins is heavy lifting enough.” I grab a bale and break it open in the trough.
It only takes a moment before ten broad heads are buried in the fluffy pungent hay.
“Yea, well, I shouldn’t complain. My pregnancy has been relatively easy.
It just irritates me when I can’t do the same things I’m used to.
” Her fingers trail over Paisley’s curly head.
“Is Libby on her way? Standing for any length of time is also becoming something I’m missing.
” She gives a soft chuckle before threading her hands together under her generous baby bump.
I slide out my phone and check Libby’s last text. “Yep, she should be pulling in any—”
The crunch of gravel makes us all look up, even Millie.
“Blue?” Char pauses, chewing on her lower lip. “Don’t break her heart, ‘kay?”
That takes a little bit of the wind out of my sails.
All I can think about is Libby.
“It’s the last thing I want to do,” I say quietly and tip my cowboy hat back, hoping to show my sincerity.
Char stares at me for a long inhale, then drops her chin.
A fresh smile spreads when she sees Libby bouncing into the barn.
“Oh my god! They’re really here!” She clasps her hands and smoothly climbs over the gate.
Millie bobs her head, almost in agreement, as Libby runs up and wraps her neck in a hug.
Alfalfa leaves stick to her hair when she pulls away, then she threads her arms around my waist.
She’s smiling, but her blue eyes are watery as she looks up at me. “Thank you for rescuing them.” She climbs to her tiptoes and lands a quick kiss on my cheek.
“All I did was drive. You’re the little rebel putting this all in play.” It feels too good holding her .
“Yea, Dad is gonna be pissed. ” Her brows raise. “I need to unload the milking machine.”
She turns to Char. “Is there a good place to dump the milk? There’s no way I’m bringing it all home.”
“Lori and I started a big compost pile near the garden. I think that’d be perfect.” Char leans with her elbows on a cross bar of the fence.
She looks like she’s getting tired.
“I’m heading back up to the house. Paisley wanted to see Millie. I’m excited for you, Lib. This is a big step.” Her gaze lands on me though, almost emphasizing the last phrase.
It makes me wince.
I get it. I’m an asshole.
But somehow, I think this thing with Libby is different.
As Char leaves with Paisley in tow, I suddenly find Libby back in my arms.
Her excitement has her practically vibrating against my body, and it’s doing things to mine.
“I can’t believe it!” She threads her fingers into my back pockets, tightening my jeans over my already taut crotch.
“Tell me what I can do to help, then we can go back to my place and celebrate.” I find the belt loops on her pants and snug her waist closer so she can feel what she’s doing to me.
She tilts her head, her mouth turning up into a mischievous grin. “Why wait?”
This fucking woman .
“Is that what you want? For everyone out there—” I gesture towards the cattle yard out beyond the barn where some of Mason’s ranch hands are pushing steers through chutes. “—to hear you scream my name?”
“Embarrassed you’ll get caught?” Her lips purse in a teasing taunt as she gyrates her hips against my stiff cock.
“Baby,” I growl against her mouth. “I have no problem letting the world know you’re mine.” My palms cup her thighs so I can lift her legs around my waist.
The cows part like a bovine sea as I carry her into the shadows of the barn.
I don’t care if anyone can hear her, but I don’t want them to see.
Her arms hug my neck, her nails raking lightly over my shoulders.
Pressing her to the wooden wall, I let my fingers trail down her belly, then tug open the button of her jeans.
“Climb that fence.” I move enough so she can turn towards the rails. “And put that pretty little ass in the air for me.”
Her eyes sparkle in the dim light before she pulls herself up the metal bars.
When her hips get high enough, I hook my thumbs around her pants and drop them to her knees.
Her glistening pussy is right at mouth level. I don’t even have to bend to get a taste of what I’ve been thinking about all day .
“Oh, shit.” She spasms when my tongue sweeps over the tight bud of her clit, making me grip her thighs harder.
Folding herself over the top, her knuckles turn white as her first moans start to escape.
I peel my lips away. “Louder,” I grunt before feasting on her with new vigor.
Her pelvis writhes against my face, but only tiny mewls reach my ears.
Flattening my palm, I give her ass a light smack. “Come on, baby. You wanted them to hear.”
She gasps at the contact, then throws me one of her wicked grins. “You said you were gonna make me yours. That’s when I scream.”
Naughty girl.
I like it.
Running my fingers up and down her dripping seam, I push two inside her tight entrance.
Her mouth makes a perfect “O”, then drops into a pant.
My hand churns into her until her heavy lidded eyes fall closed and her pussy starts to clench around my knuckles.
Those breathy sounds grow more rapid until her body stiffens, squeezing me so hard I can’t move my arm.
But she’s quiet.
“Do I need to spank you harder?” I nip at the pale globe of her ass as she rides out the wave of her climax.
“You can try and see,” she says breathlessly.
There’s that damn grin again .
“You are a rebel. Begging to be fucked, aren’t you?” I reach for my wallet, but my stomach sinks when I don’t see a condom stashed inside.
“Shit. I can’t.”
When in the hell did I use that one?
Vegas.
Once Libby told me she wanted me the night of her birthday, I haven’t even looked twice at another woman.
“I’m yours, huh?” she says ruefully, straightening before she starts to climb down the fence. “Use ‘em so often you forgot to restock?”
When the hem of her jeans slides up to cover the bite mark I left on her ass, I know I’m screwed.
“The reason it’s empty is because I haven’t gone out with the intent to use one since Thanksgiving.” I hope she can hear the sincerity in my voice.
Her nose wrinkles as her arms cross over her chest. “It’s all good, Blue. You don’t expect me to believe you’ve gone five months. I was just being stupid thinking I was special.”
My palms cup her jaw. “But you are.”
At least she isn’t pulling away.
“It’s just that…the last thing either of us need right now is to complicate things with a baby.” Although it makes my nuts ache at the thought of coming inside her without a barrier. I’ve already done it once by mistake though.
More than I ever have in the past. I’m always careful.
She makes me reckless .
“Why? Kids are amazing. Or you just don’t want to be tied to me forever?” She shrugs off my hands. “Maybe I’m just the weird one?” She stalks towards the far gate. “I’m one of those crazy people that once I make up my mind, I don’t change it.”
I watch her move to the rear of her pickup and drop the tailgate. When she starts to unstrap a bulky tank with tubes, it spurs me into action.
“Here, push it over, I’ll help you get it down.” I want the last few minutes to disappear.
Damn sure thing I’ll never forget to put protection in my wallet again.
She rolls the machine close enough I can reach it. It’s heavier than it looks.
Raising my hand, I offer her my palm.
But she stops, towering over me, and plants her fists on her hips. “When I was four, I decided that pink was my favorite color.” Her lips purse as she stares down at me.
I wait for a moment, then drop my arm, confused. “Okay?”
Her eyes narrow. “People change all the time. Not me. When I was twelve and mom first got sick, she had to get a hysterectomy.” She squats in the bed, low enough our faces are level.
“You know what she said? That she wished she had more babies. I guess they were trying for more when she got the diagnosis.” Her mouth purses as tears gather on her lower lids, but she sniffles them away.
“So it made me want kids someday. Paisley is the coolest toddler ever. And I know Char struggled, but she did a great job even when she was single.”
“Lib, I—”
She holds up her hand. “I ain’t saying I want to get knocked up right now either.
What I don’t want is a guy who’s so terrified of the fact that he just stands in shock when the possibility is staring him in the face.
” Her fist tangles in my shirt to tug me closer, then she presses her lips to mine in a fierce kiss.
When she pulls away, her chin juts. “I want you,” she whispers. “I’ve made my mind up. But now the ball is in your court.”
She hops down unassisted and grabs the bar of the milker to start rolling it towards the barn.
“You need to decide, Blue.” She doesn’t look back as she talks to me. “Be with me and flirt with danger, or we part now so I can find someone who isn’t petrified of wanting to be a dad.”
Jesus, I really fucked up. All because I thought I was being responsible.
I glance over at the men yelling back and forth in the stock yard.
Any one of them is closer to her age. They’re hard working, solid guys who would probably leap at the chance to be with her.
I bet many of them have already hit on her .
The idea of someone other than me touching her makes me feel violent.
And nauseous.
Maybe there’s a reason I haven’t looked twice at another woman since Thanksgiving when she pressed her body against mine?
Or that every night since her birthday party, I’ve dreamed about her?
The highlight of my morning was the brief kiss I stole when gathering the trailer.
Yea. My heart has already chosen.
It’s just my fucking brain that hadn’ t caught up.