October 17th 2021
He almost killed me.
I swear it was on purpose. At least it’s fall now, and the cooler weather won't bring attention to the long sleeves and the turtle necks I’ll have to wear for the time being.
I honestly thought he was trying to kill me last night.
We hadn’t had sex in a while, so of course when he was being sweet and trying to initiate some form of intimacy, I wasn’t going to turn him away—I couldn’t risk it.
I had asked him a long time ago if we could start trying new things.
I’ve always wanted to branch out sexually.
The books that I read, though they aren’t a guide for how to get into the kinks that are in them, at least get me curious.
He wouldn’t stop choking me. We had established a safe word and a safe way for me to ‘tap out’, only he ignored me.
I couldn’t say anything once it was over, though, he reminded me that he had done that because I had asked for it.
What argument did I have? None, I had none. I didn’t want to start one either.
I was able to get him not to stay the night. I don’t let him stay the night much since that would mean putting Riley in his crate the entire time. I wasn’t sad to see him go as I saw the bruising on my neck in the bathroom mirror.