18. Lincoln
18
LINCOLN
I tugged my coat tighter, trying to keep the cold out walking from the parking lot to my apartment building. I’d spent the morning cleaning for Devon to come over for pizza and a movie. It had been a moment of crazy on my part. That was the only thing I could come up with to explain why I would ask Devon over to my place when it could never compare to his home.
Nothing Devon had done up to this point made me feel like it would matter, which left me wondering why I was so worked up over it. That didn’t stop me from meticulously scrubbing every inch of my apartment and analyzing where I had pictures and other keepsakes placed. When I explained it to Dr. Dawkins this afternoon, he did his best to remind me that Devon knew who I was the first time he asked me out. That he obviously didn’t care about what I had or didn’t.
Almost all my sessions lately had centered around Devon and my relationship with him. Every day, I grew more comfortable letting him get to know me, well a lot more of me. I wasn’t nearly ready to throw myself out there completely yet, there were still secrets I kept close. Secrets that I was sure would break me if they ever came to the light of day again. The only way I knew to survive them was to keep them locked up tight. Maybe I’d be able to tell Devon one day, but for now I’d keep it between me and Dr. Dawkins. I’d keep taking it one day at a time, the same I knew Devon was doing with me.
When he was on the road last week, we spent a lot of the time texting, getting to know each other. I think it allowed him to be more open without having to worry about being face-to-face. He seemed to feel more comfortable with what was growing between us. He’d been quick to text me when he arrived home. Things between us were getting stronger and I started to have much more confidence in my ability to have a relationship after the military.
Unlocking the door, I dropped my keys onto the table and glanced around. Things were as good as they were going to get. I tossed the bag of Reese’s Pieces on the counter. The quick impulse buy on the way back to my apartment probably shouldn’t have been the large bag. I walked to my room to shower, then remembered that I’d showered right before leaving for Dr. Dawkins’s office. Apparently, my nerves were getting the best of me. I wandered back into the living room, swiped the bag off the counter, and grabbed the remote. There was still an hour until Devon showed up.
I flipped on the TV, scrolling through the guide. Clicking on one thing, then another. Nothing kept my attention while I watched the clock, dropping a few peanut butter candies in my mouth every so often. My phone was already in my hand when the text came through that Devon was pulling into the lot. Wasn’t like I had a doorman to keep people from swarming him on the way to the elevator. Then again, with the shape he was in, he could probably make it up the three flights without a problem.
The knock on my door startled me, even though I knew Devon was on his way up. Normally, I wasn’t the nervous type. I’d always been confident in who I was, but something about my relationship with Devon was different. I may not be ready to admit that yet, hopefully someday I would be.
Rolling my shoulders, I walked to the door and opened it, finding Devon on the other side with a huge smile on his face. “Hey.”
“Hey.” I stepped back. “Come in.”
I watched Devon as he looked around. “Thanks for inviting me over.”
I stepped past him to the couch. “It’s not much but it’s home.”
Devon linked his fingers with mine, stopping me from moving any farther. “You know I don’t care about that, right?”
I squeezed his hand and turned to face him. “I do. I guess, I’m just a little nervous, which is so unlike me.”
“That’s normally me in your presence.” He smiled and ducked his head. “I just want to spend time with you. I don’t care where it is.”
His words settled me. Normally confident, it shook me a little to feel so worked up over something as simple as what Devon would think about my apartment. “Should we pick a movie or order pizza first?”
“Pizza, I think. I’m starving.”
“Pizza it is.” I walked over and picked my phone up from where I left it on the couch. “Any toppings?”
“Pepperoni.”
I wandered into the kitchen and called in the order for the pizza. Before I went back into the living room, I grabbed two bottles of water from the fridge. “Pizza should be here soon.” I handed him a bottle. “What do you want to watch?”
He held up the bag of Reese’s. “Dessert before dinner?”
I smirked. “Looks like you found my drug of choice.”
Devon eyed the bag. “So this is how you handle stress?”
“Kind of. I always loved them as a kid. They remind me of home,” I answered cautiously, wondering what was going through Devon’s mind.
I took a seat on the couch, patting the one next to me. Devon sat down and leaned into my side. His heat against me felt so right. We settled back on the couch and I handed Devon the remote so he could scan through our options. A smile tilted the corner of my lips when he chose the same movie I would have picked.
“Guess we have the same taste in movies.”
“Yeah?”
“Yep.” I wrapped my arm around Devon’s shoulder and hugged him to me.
About an hour into the movie, the pizza gone, I found myself lying on the couch with my head in Devon’s lap, him running his fingers up and down my scalp. It was intimate and comforting at the same time. My lids started to feel heavy. Adjusting myself, I woke right up. Devon’s rock-hard cock touched my cheek. No longer did I give a shit what we were watching. I wanted… no needed to taste Devon on my tongue.
I pushed myself from the couch and moved to kneel in front of Devon. His hard cock clearly outlined in his pants. Devon’s eyes were no longer looking at the TV but solely focused on me. I placed my hands on his knees, sliding my palms up his thighs. Each breath he took came faster than the one before. I moved slowly, reaching for the button of his pants. If he wanted me to stop, I gave him plenty of chances.
The lights reflecting off the TV lit his face up enough that I could see the heat in his gaze. I popped the button and pulled down the zipper. Each click throbbing with the pulse of my dick as it begged to be released from its confines. I slipped my fingers beneath the fabric of his boxer briefs, running them along the tip of his already leaking cock. A cock, I was dying to wrap my lips around.
With my other hand, I tapped his thigh. “Lift.”
When his ass came off the couch, I tugged his pants and underwear down his legs, letting his cock spring free. Hard and begging for attention, I wrapped my hand around the smooth skin and moved my hand up and down slowly. Harsh breaths left Devon’s lips as I lowered my head and swiped my tongue across the tip.
“Lincoln,” Devon groaned.
“So fucking sexy,” I said before lowering my head all the way down and taking Devon to the back of my throat.
Devon’s hand found my hair again and tightened, pulling the strands. His scent surrounded me as I brought my lips up and sucked him back down. Devon’s hips started to move with each pass of my lips. My own cock throbbed, begging to be buried deep in his warm body.
“Please, Linc.”
When the begging plea left his lips, I knew the time was right. He wanted the same thing I did. I lifted my mouth off him and brought my eyes up to his. The heat that burned in his gaze set me on fire, even without touching him. I pushed up to standing and held out my hand. Devon didn’t waste a second and placed his hand in mine. I pulled him up and gave him a moment to tug his pants up, so he didn’t trip, even if we weren’t going far.
I guided Devon across the living room, straight to my bedroom. Besides my bed and a dresser, there wasn’t space for much else in my room. A small table next to my bed the only other thing in the room. Bypassing the switch on the wall, I flipped on the lamp on top of the dresser. Even if Devon had handled the parts of my story I could tell him at this point, I still wasn’t sure he could handle the mess on my back.
The tattoos on my arm made the scars hard to see. Someday, I’d find the art and time to cover the scars on my back. Until then, I kept every man in my bed in front of me. It was why I always topped, and my dick really hoped that Devon would be okay with that.
I turned to face him. “You look so sexy in my bedroom. But you’d look even better if you were wearing less than you are now. Strip, Devon.”
He reached for the buttons of his shirt. “I hope that means you’re going to get naked too.”
“Oh, I will. I want to watch you first.” Which was mostly true. I did want to watch him. I just wanted him to be in my bed before I took off my shirt. Feeling the scars and seeing them were two different things.
Piece by piece, Devon removed his clothing. As the last piece fell to the floor, I pointed toward my bed. “Now, I’d really love to see you lying in my bed.”
Devon sucked in a breath. He climbed onto the bed, lying on his back, facing me with his arms beneath his head.
“Goddamn, your jersey hides all those sexy muscles you have.” I grabbed the condoms and lube from the nightstand and tossed them on the bed before starting on my own pants. I tugged down the zipper and pushed them to the floor. Kicking them to the side, I ditched my shirt and climbed from the bottom of the bed, up and over Devon.
“Look who’s talking. I’d never expected all this under your scrubs.” His fingers trailed down my arms.
I bent my head and captured Devon’s lips, sucking the bottom one into my mouth. His tongue darted into my mouth to tangle with mine. A groan tore from my lips when his cock rubbed against mine.
I ground my hips down at the same time Devon pushed up against me. “Linc, god you feel so good.”
“I need more, Dev. I want to be buried deep inside you. Will you let me?”
“Fuck, yes. You have no idea how much I want that.”
If it was even half as much as I wanted him, I had a pretty good idea. I moved to the side and reached for the lube. As I coated my fingers in the cool liquid, I knew that being with Devon would change everything. Devon called to me in a way I hadn’t experienced in a long time. This would mean something. The moment I slid into his body, things would change between us, and for the first time since Devon asked me out, I felt like I might just be ready for it.
“Lincoln?” Devon was looking at me with worried eyes.
“I’m good.” I ran one of my coated fingers up and down his crease, putting pressure against his hole. “I got lost in how much I want this with you.”
“You’re not alone. I want it too.”
I pushed my finger inside. The tight heat that gripped my finger made my cock leak. I knew it was going to take every ounce of patience I had to keep from coming as soon as I got inside him. I moved my finger, twisting until I found the spot that made Devon buck his hips from the bed. I added a second finger, scissoring them until Devon pushed back against me.
“More. I can handle it.” Devon held the condom out to me. I didn’t waste a second, taking it from him.
Tearing off the wrapper, I sheathed my dick and lowered down over him. I lined my cock up and pushed forward.
“Fuck, fuck, fuck,” I moaned, slipping deeper into his body. Devon gripped my ass cheeks, pulling me forward. The moment I bottomed out I froze, breathing deep. Trying to get my control. “You feel so good. Give me a sec, I don’t want to come too soon.”
When Devon moved to slide his hands toward my back, I grabbed them and wound them around my neck. I wasn’t ready to go there yet. All I wanted right now was him.
Devon weaved his fingers into the hair and pulled my head down to him. “Give me everything. I want it all, Linc.”
I groaned and sealed our mouths together. Tongues tangled. Hips moving. I pulled back and thrust deep. Devon held me tight to him, but what he didn’t realize was that I wasn’t going anywhere.
Each move of my hips brought me closer to the edge. My balls grew tighter. It wouldn’t be long, and I wanted Devon to come with me. Reluctantly, I tore my mouth from his and pushed up on my elbow so I could reach his cock. Stroking it in time with each thrust, I kept my pace.
Devon threw his head back as his body tightened around mine. Jet after jet of cum flew up his chest. The room started to blur. Heat raced down my spine.
“Devon!” I shouted into the room as I tumbled over the edge, coming deep inside him.
Breathless, I fell to the side of Devon and gathered him close to me. Right then, I felt more whole than I had in a long time. There were still pieces missing, but I had to wonder if the man in my arms would be the one to help me put them all back into place. Hopefully, because there was one thing I knew for certain.
I was falling hard for Devon D’Agostino.