Chapter 63 #3
“I think the worst part of this is Mom’s trapped there.
I can’t even tell her. I honestly think she would be over the moon about this if Dad wasn’t a homophobic asshole.
She can’t wait for my niece to be born. Dad’s not even happy about that, you know?
He wanted the first-born of the first-born to be a boy to carry on the ‘family name.’” I use finger quotes.
“More like to continue the family bullshit,” Todd says.
I touch my nose and point at him.
He gently squeezes my thigh. “Want to go shopping for baby stuff?”
I finally meet his gaze. “Not jinxing this,” I say. “Let’s make sure everything’s…” I wave my hands over my stomach. “That would be so much worse, to lose the baby after getting everything ready.”
“Yeah, I guess you’re right.” His hand lightly rubs my thigh and it’s distracting as hell because I like how it feels. “We can convert the largest guest room into the nursery.”
I cock my head at him. “What’d I just say?”
“I didn’t say right now,” he insists. “But you are moving in with me,” he adds.
“As in, tonight. I get needing your own space, but I have four damned guest rooms. You are free to pick whichever one you want to completely turn into your own space, and I promise to respect that. Or if you want the apartment for that, you can use that. Or I’ll even build you a building up here by the house, one of those metal barns like what the fun room is in and—”
I grab him by the shirt and pull him in for a kiss. “Please shut the fuck up,” I silently say, and that makes him laugh even as he wraps his arms around me and kisses me.
“I love you,” he says.
“I love you, too.”
He ends the kiss and we sit there with our foreheads pressed together, eyes closed, just…breathing.
“Marry me, baby,” he whispers. “I don’t have a ring for you, but we can go shopping for whatever you want.”
For a long moment we stare into each other’s eyes. “Okay,” I say. “I won’t hold you to it, though. If you change your mind.”
He snorts and I can see the elk in him even more than I could before. “No way I’m changing my mind.” He finally looks down. “I’ve never felt about anyone the way I feel about you.”
He seems almost…bashful again. “I know it’s not a traditional mate bond, but Mom and Caleb have made it work for decades and they’re in love with each other.”
His gaze returns to mine. “Isn’t that just as good?
That they chose to be together? And look at how we can communicate.
Obviously, I won’t force you. But I know how I feel about you.
You were special from the first moment I met you.
I’m confident we’ll be happy.” He takes a deep breath.
“I’m pretty sure I fell in love with you that first night we played.
And if this isn’t a mate bond I feel for you, then I don’t know what is. ”
I lay my hand over his on my thigh, mostly to still his because it’s distracting as hell in good ways and if I can’t have sex letting him get me worked up and horny’s a baaaad idea.
“I’m in love with you, too. And hope to hell that this is a mate bond.
But still, let’s take things a day at a time, okay? I’m…overwhelmed. I need to process.”
“I’m not ashamed to admit I’m overwhelmed, too,” he says. “But there’s no way in hell I’m walking away from you. I want to spend the rest of my life with you.” He opens his eyes and stares into mine and I have to kiss him again. It’s…it’s a need.
“Okay,” I say when I finally end that kiss. “I guess we have us a relationship.”
He leans in and kisses me, and it has to be the most beautiful feeling in the world, this sweet, gentle warmth that seeps through every bit of my soul.
Please let this be a mate bond, because I never want to know what it feels like to lose this man.
“Guess I’d better break the bad news to Sam,” he says.
“Whoa, what?”
“That things have changed.”
“You can still see him.”
He cocks his head, apparently not understanding me.
“Look, I don’t have a problem with you doing stuff as long as it’s not behind my back.
I’ll speak up if there’s someone I want to strike from the list, but the doc said I can’t have sex.
Frankly, I suspect you’ll be ornery as hell if you don’t get laid.
Hell, I wouldn’t even mind watching and seeing if that bothers me.
If it bothers me, I’ll just go into another room and let you enjoy yourself.
Or who knows? Maybe I’ll love it and want to join in.
If he’s willing. I mean, join in as much as I can right now. ”
His brow furrows. “You sure?”
“Yeah. Positive. Hell, if I wasn’t on restrictions I’d probably be begging to join you.” My stomach picks that moment to grumble, making Todd laugh.
“Guess our grocery bill will be going up.” He helps me sit up.
“Just no ‘little momma’ jokes about me, okay?” I say. “I’m a dude. I get that this is outside the norm, even by male omega standards, but I have my pride.”
“Of course.” I stare into his brown eyes and wonder if our baby will have those, or my grey eyes.
I hope they’re brown, with the flecks of mahogany and amber, like he has.
“What are you thinking, baby?” he softly asks.
I smile and brush a kiss across his lips. “That this isn’t how I expected to spend our evening.”
I love his smile. “Me, either.” His smile fades. “Sorry.”
“About what?”
“I didn’t know you’d get pregnant on your first heat. I was hoping by this time you’d be begging for more and wearing out me and the rest of the mating heat team.” He smiles and I playfully shove him.
“Well, there’s always my next heat.” I nuzzle my nose against his. “Then again, maybe my next few heats we should limit it to toys and mechanical assists. And your cock.”
His gaze narrows in obvious confusion. “Huh?”
I kiss him again. “Because if I caught this easily on my first time, I have a feeling if we’re not careful that we’ll end up with a houseful of kids. I want them all to be yours, thank you very much.”
Something flashes across his face, dark and dangerous and before I can fully process it he pulls me in for a crushing kiss.
“You’re mine,” he rumbles. “Like fucking hell am I letting anyone else get you pregnant.” Then he sighs and lightly rests his hands on my stomach.
“I guess when we do handle your mating heats we’ll need to make everyone wrap if they’re fucking you, since now we know a non-canine shifter being safe isn’t an option. ”
“Weeelll,” I playfully say, “we can use this as an excuse to shop for more fucking machines.”
His face goes blank before he roars with laughter. “You and I will end up being damned popular if we do that, you realize that, right? We’ll have to expand the fun room because we’ll have people begging to visit.”
I grin. “What’s wrong with that? I can get my slut on with others when I’m not in heat, right?”
Another of those sexy, deep, territorial rumbles. “With my permission,” he says. “I won’t be an asshole, but I get a say just like you get a say. And I get to be there and play with you while you do it.”
I drape my arms around his neck and stare into his eyes. “Shawn was telling me about Jax’s knot, too. I want to feel that, but is it twisted that I really want to watch you take it, too?”
“Jesusfuck, you’ll be the death of me, baby.” He kisses me again. “Before any of that happens, there’s another knot I want to feel first.”
“Who?”
He snorts. “Yours, duh. Uh, aren’t you a wolf?”
Heat fills my face. “I… I’ve never done that before,” I softly admit. “Fuck while shifted.”
His gaze softens. “Sooo, you’re saying you never—”
“I have no clue how big I am like that, okay? Any time I was on a pack run I was too busy trying not to bone up. And no, I’ve never tried licking myself.”
His arms cage me, a sexy, smoldering smile curving those gorgeous lips of his. “So I’d be your first?”
My face heats even more. “Shifted? Yes.”
“Oh, baby.” He slants his lips over mine again and as much as I’m enjoying it I really can’t let him get me horned up.
“Yes, you get it first,” I gasp, “but this is killing me! I’m not supposed to have sex right now and all I want to do is drag you outside, run again, and fuck your brains out!”
“Sorry.” He stands, holding his hand out to me, and I take it and let him help me up. “How about I put you into a steak and potatoes coma instead?”
I grin. “I think I can be persuaded.”