Chapter 23 Aspen
Aspen
“I’ve got to run into town for some things. Need anything?” Brooks asks me one day after work when he sees me outside my cabin. It’s almost as if he read my mind because I do actually need to go to town.
“Actually, yeah, can I ride along with you?”
Without any hesitation, he says, “Of course.”
Things with Brooks have slowly gotten back to normal. I know he’d rather I forget about the kiss, but there’s no way I could ever do that. The best I can do is to pretend I’ve forgotten for his sake. Unfortunately for me, my crush on him has done nothing but grow since that night.
But pretending everything is fine has worked out so far. We’ve even started up our nightly rides again. Things are starting to feel normal again.
I get in his truck, and he drives us to town.
“Where do you need to go?” he asks as he finds a spot in the center of town.
“The pharmacy. It should be quick. Do you want me to meet you somewhere?”
“I’ll just come with you,” he offers.
My hand freezes on the door handle. Oh, crap. I didn’t think this part through. I’d really rather him not be with me while I pick up my birth control refill, but I can’t ask him to leave me alone. I should’ve just driven myself.
“Ok,” I say slowly, but he’s already walking toward the pharmacy.
The man walks with such confidence, I can’t help but stare.
I’ve noticed other women like to stare at him, too.
I wonder why he doesn’t go on any dates.
From what Jazz tells me, there are plenty of single women around town who make it very obvious that they would love a chance to try to win over Brooks Calloway.
He’s a smart man. I refuse to believe that he doesn’t know about his charm.
So, I wonder why he keeps them all at arm’s length?
I’d ask him, but after everything that’s happened, it would feel like I was too invested.
It’s best if I keep my thoughts to myself.
Once I catch up to him and we’re inside the pharmacy, Brooks points to the other side of the store, telling me he’ll be over there, which is a relief. The last thing I want this town to start talking about is how I picked up birth control with my ex-boyfriend’s dad.
I get to the counter where an older lady stands waiting to help me.
“Hi. I’m here to pick up a prescription for Aspen Fallon.”
She smiles and types my name into her computer before turning to find my medicine from the shelves. It takes her forever to find it, and by the time I see her coming back, I’m checking over my shoulder to see if Brooks is making his way over here yet. Thankfully, I don’t see him.
The woman scans my bag, and as I’m paying, loudly asks, “Now do you know how to use this, dear?”
“Yep, I got it.”
“It’s important to take this at the same time every day. I’ve seen too many girls your age not take it right and end up pregnant.”
“I know. I have a reminder set on my phone, but thank you.” I take the clear bag from her outstretched hand and move away from the desk as quickly as I can, trying to unzip my purse so I can shove it in there. But before I can get it in, I run into something. Not something. Someone.
I drop the bag and look up at Brooks, whose hands are on my arms to steady me.
“Whoa. Where are you runnin’ off to, darlin’?”
Oh god. Why does he have to call me darlin’? He hasn’t said it in weeks, but hearing the nickname again makes me want to melt right here and now. Judging by the little smirk he gives me, I think he knows exactly how much I enjoy it.
“Oh, not running. Just didn’t want you to have to wait too long.”
He bends down to pick up the bag before I have a chance to stop him and pauses, clearing his throat, when he registers what it is. “Here you go.”
“Thanks,” I say, quickly taking it and shoving it in my purse.
“It’s good you’re being safe.” I know my face is beet red right now.
“It’s to regulate my periods.” Why did I say that? Please stop talking, Aspen.
He nods. “That’s good too.”
“Yep.” There’s an awkward pause while we both attempt to figure out how to change the subject. “Did you get what you needed here?”
“Yeah, I’m good. Gotta hit up the grocery store next.”
“Let’s go then,” I say, gesturing to the door. He follows me out and down the sidewalk to the store.
We each pick up a basket and split up to get what we need.
I grab some ramen, macaroni and cheese, and bread for sandwiches.
All easy stuff. Ever since I left Zach, I haven’t really wanted to cook anything.
Not that I did much cooking while we were together, but I definitely did more than I am now. I just can’t be bothered.
“Aspen.”
“Hmm?” I turn to see Brooks scowling as he looks in my basket.
“I know I pay you enough to eat decent food.”
“You do.”
“So why are you buying all that crap?”
I shrug. “I don’t really like cooking. I’d rather just have quick options to grab.”
“No, you’re not eating this.” He starts putting my stuff back on the shelves.
“Hey!”
“When you’re hungry, you come to my house, and I’ll feed you,” he says as if it’s the most obvious thing in the world.
“I can’t ask you to cook for me every night.”
“You’re not asking. I’m telling you. I will be cooking for you as long as you live in my cabin.”
“Brooks—”
“Don’t fight me on this, Aspen. You know I have plenty of food. My mama never taught me to cook for just one anyway.”
I sigh. I have seen how much food he makes, but still, he shouldn’t have to cook for me after he also gave me a free place to live. “I don’t think that’s a good idea.”
“You don’t have to eat with me if that’s your hesitation. I can package it up for you and bring it over if that makes you more comfortable.”
I love that he’s concerned for me. “I’m not uncomfortable around you, Brooks. It’s just the opposite, actually.”
We stand in the middle of aisle five staring at each other. I watch his Adam’s apple bob as he swallows, and I realize that maybe our situation is just as hard on him as it is for me. “We can be friends, can’t we, Aspen?”
“Friends,” I repeat in a raspy voice. “Yeah, we can be friends.”
“Good. Then we’ll have dinner together. As friends.”
I nod slowly. “Alright. I’ll let you cook me dinner if it’ll make you happy.”
He smiles, and I swear he’s trying to kill me. Happy Brooks is adorable. And I know grown men shouldn’t be adorable, but he’s always so serious. Or in work mode. So when he smiles, I feel like he’s letting some of his true self shine through.
“It makes me very happy,” he says as he moves his attention from me and focuses on grabbing a few more items from the shelves.
I follow him around with an empty basket.
I feel kinda silly that he’s going to be cooking for me, but I’m also excited because that means I get to spend more time with him. I am so down bad for this man.
After the grocery store, we make one more quick stop at the post office next door so Brooks can drop off a few letters, and then we’re on our way back to the ranch.
Brooks parks his truck in front of his house and then grabs the groceries from the backseat.
“Should I bring you dinner tonight, or do you want to eat at my house?” he asks, and I suddenly feel awkward because I had forgotten earlier that I already have dinner plans for tonight.
“Oh, I don’t need dinner tonight.”
He stops what he’s doing to look at me. “You going out?”
“Yes.”
“With Dawson?”
I nod. “Yes.”
“Ok.”
He finishes grabbing his things, but before he gets to his front door, I stop him.
“Tell me not to go,” I blurt out. If he told me right here and now not to go out with Dawson, I’d cancel with no hesitation. It’s probably a sign that I shouldn’t be going out with him, but if Brooks really doesn’t want to see where we could go, then I have to at least try to move on with my life.
“Dawson is a good guy,” he says.
“He is,” I agreed. But he’s not you, is what I wish I could say.
“You should go, Aspen. Have fun.”
I nod and swallow back my tears. At least I tried. “Alright.”
He nods, and I turn to walk away. I don’t look back at him, but I don’t hear his front door open, so I know he’s watching me. And when I leave for my date, he’s sitting on his front porch.
When I get home after a night of food, drinks, and dancing with Dawson, Brooks is still sitting there. Almost as if he was waiting for me to get home. I suppose I should be grateful he didn’t show up at the restaurant again this time.
I don’t walk over to him, and he doesn’t call out to me.
I simply pretend he’s not there, which I’m sure is what he wants. But once I’m inside my cabin, I let out a long exhale. I’m never going to get over him if I have to see him like this every damn day.