Chapter 25 #3
Holding my eye contact, he reaches over to flick the light switch on the wall. I blink as my eyes adjust. There’s light shining in from the family room, so we’re not in the pitch dark. That doesn’t stop my mind from imagining all the things I’d love to do with Reed in the dark, though.
As fantasies assault me, my feet stay rooted in place. He prowls toward me like a starving lion stalking his prey.
Yes, eat me. I promise I’m delicious.
His sustained eye contact is unnerving in the most tantalizing way. All his intensity is squarely on me. I’m flooded with warmth.
Seriously, did someone turn the A/C off?
Finding courage from a reserve I didn’t know I possessed, I don’t back up. Instead, I let him get as near to me as he wishes. Turns out, he wants to be within sniffing distance. Works for me.
Standing mere inches away, he puts one of his strong hands on my hip, sending ripples of electricity throughout my body. “Cookie, if you don’t want me to leave, just say so.”
The confession burns my tongue until I set it free. “Okay. I don’t want you to leave.”
One thing nobody teaches you is where to put your hands when you’re in a situation like this. Do I put them on my hips? Around his shoulders? Down his pants?
Down mine?
Glancing at my mouth, he says, “Well, we’ve got a problem then. Because I can’t stay here any longer.”
By sheer force of will, I refuse to pout. Barely.
With his next words, he makes his intention crystal clear—even to someone as clueless as me. “Any idea where I can sleep tonight? You got a spot for me at your place?”
“Reed,” I breathe out his name like I’m chiding him.
He doesn’t laugh it off or pretend it away. This thing that’s happening between us. Nope. Not Reed.
Undaunted and fearless, he’s doing what he’s always done—setting his sights on a goal and making it happen.
And unless I wake up from this dream soon, he’s going to get exactly what he wants. Me.
His hand pulses around my waist. “I don’t want to be alone tonight, Lila.”
Oh wait. Maybe he’s just upset about his father and all the family stuff. This is just his way of asking me to spend time with him. Probably so he can talk out his feelings or let me distract him with my nonsense. That makes sense.
However, the look on his face says otherwise. Like he wants my company for more than a shoulder or an open ear. I’m so confused.
Pull your big girl panties up, Lila. There’s one way to find out what he needs from you.
Actually, there are two. I could ask him. The problem with that approach is that it leaves me exposed to ridicule if I’ve misread this entire situation. So I’ll go with the other option.
Rising to my tiptoes, I open my arms for an embrace. “Sounds like you need a hug. I’m good at those.” Without giving him time to react, I pull him gently toward me.
Almost instantly, he folds himself around my frame, soaking up my offered solace. With both hands surrounding me now, he squeezes me tightly and burrows his face into my neck.
Ah. So it was comfort he needed. Not me or my body—well, certainly not in the way I thought. This makes much more sense.
I rub small circles on his upper back as we cling together. His breathing evens out, while I struggle to control mine. Last thing he needs when he’s working through his grief is me panting in his ear like a big fat Pug.
My eyes shoot wide open as one of his hands drifts from my waist, heading lower.
Lower yet.
And even lower.
All the way until his hand rests under the large curve of my butt. And then he grabs it. Not gently. Not a graze or a pulse. Not a tap.
This is a point-making squeeze.
He drives home his intentions by whispering directly into my ear. “Cookie, I want a lot more from you than a hug. Am I not being clear?”
My core absolutely floods, and heat spreads through me. “Message received.”
Pulling away from my ear, he looks me dead in the eyes. “This isn’t about grief or me just wanting an escape from pain. It’s nothing like that. This is me, wanting you for so damn long, and finally giving in. I don’t want to fight it anymore.”
“You-you-you’ve wanted me?” I crick my head to the side, nose wrinkled. “Me? Lila?”
His grin turns lascivious. “Painfully. Desperately. Sweet Lila Kent.”
My thoughts are jumbled with arousal and doubt, and some of that shines through my paltry excuse for a reply. “Since when?”
“Since I got home from college. That’s why I was always waiting up when you and Kenzie would get home.
Stealing time with you. Staging our chance meetings in the hallway.
Walking around with no shirt, like I was putting on a show for you.
Flexing my muscles like a prick when I reached for something near you. None of that tipped you off?”
“Well, I assumed you enjoyed teasing me. Or needed an ego boost.”
“I’m not an asshole.” His eyes narrow to seductive slits. “And you weren’t innocent either. With those low-cut tops you wore all the time, and your fuck me eyes.” He rounds his lips, exhaling pointedly. “You looked at me like you wanted to eat me up. You knew what you were doing.”
I tuck my lips into my mouth to stop from admitting how right he is. I did all those things and more. Not because it was a game of cat and mouse, but because when I looked at him, I did want to devour him. No comment about the increasing cleavage.
“Reed, since you’re feeling open about the past, there’s something I always found odd from back then.”
“What?”
“All those times we were on the couch, deep in conversation . . . what was with your balls?”
His eyes bulge, and he chokes back a laugh.
Snickering to myself, I clarify, “That came out wrong. I meant the balls you were always tossing in the air. Basketballs, baseballs, volleyballs. I thought you had rampant hyperactivity or were training for a sports career.”
His laughter gradually subsides. “Truth?”
“Yes.”
“I had to have something in my hands to stop myself from grabbing you.”
My cheeks start hurting from the lengthiest and widest smile of my life.
Reed has wanted me for years. Me. It doesn’t seem possible, yet here I am.
At some point, my hands make it around his shoulders. They’re strong and wide, making me feel safe. “I should confess something too.”
“Oh, please do.”
“When Kenzie and I had plans, I intentionally came over early when I knew she wouldn’t be ready. Just so I had a chance to talk to you.”
He releases my waist with one hand to gingerly tuck my hair behind one ear. “I loved our talks.”
“Me too.”
His throat tenses, and his brows draw in tight. In a tone cushioned by a feather pillow, he says, “The only time I ever felt like I belonged in this house was when you were here.”
I’m melting into a puddle.
His confession triggers something inside me. A familiarity I haven’t been able to put into words. The way he phrased it rings so very true for me as well.
I’ve never felt more like myself than when I’m with him. A rightness that resonates in my bones.
Because of this man.
He’s so far out of my league, though. How could he feel the same about me?
Once more, my insecurities fly out of my mouth. “This is a joke, right? I mean, look at us. It doesn’t—”
“If you don’t want me, that’s one thing.” He pauses there, waiting for my reaction.
“I do. Duh.”
“Good. Then I’ll be happy to lay to rest any doubts you have about how we fit together. Let me show you.”
I nibble my lower lip. “What about Kenzie?”
“What about her? She told you to leave, didn’t she?”
“Yeah. But she’s my best friend.”
“And?”
Kenzie figured out I had a crush on Reed a few years ago. She didn’t forbid me from being with him, but I got the feeling she wouldn’t approve. Although I have no proof of that. Perhaps my doubts are because they don’t get along, and I’d feel like I had to choose between them.
Given the current circumstances, it’s not a good time to talk to Kenzie about this to get her permission. That would go over horribly.
I never gave much thought to how I’d handle this, since the odds of this moment happening were astronomical. Now that it’s become a reality, I’m torn.
I’m also extremely horny for Reed. And that’s getting top billing in my mind.
He must sense my uncertainty, so he softly adds, “Lila, if you’re worried about how Kenzie will react, that’s valid.
She’d probably hate it because she hates me.
And this wouldn’t be a one-time thing. You’re special.
I want more than one night, so we’ll need to deal with her objections at some point.
If we leave together now, I need you to be sure.
I don’t want to ruin your friendship with her.
” With some of his confidence waning, he starts to pull out of my hold.
“I’d understand if you chose her over me. I’m used to that.”
No, no, no.
I tighten my grip on his shoulder, unwilling to let him go. “It isn’t that.
“What’s holding you back?”
Honesty trembles inside me, begging to be set free. “I’m scared of being hurt. Or not being good enough for you.” Shame forces my chin to droop to my chest.
“That’s impossible.” He cups my cheeks and tilts my face up. His mocha eyes sparkle with honesty. “Lila, we’ve been circling each other like the earth and the sun, gravity doing its thing to keep us tethered. I’ve had years to envision how I’d cherish you if I were lucky enough to earn you.”
Hook. Line. Sinker.
With five more words, he reels me all the way in. “I promise I won’t hurt you.”