28. Jamieson
twenty-eight
Jamieson
M y favourite part after any rodeo is the after-party.
The energy is high, and if any of our crew had great performances, we ride that post-performance like the biggest wave in the ocean. Tonight, I might as well be an Olympic-level surfer.
I had the best ride of my life, and I’m finally making it to the National Finals. But that’s not the best part. The best part stands in the corner chatting with a barrel rider from town. As if he feels my gaze on him, Griff swivels away from the pretty brunette and meets my stare. He smiles at the woman again before politely excusing himself and walking my way.
Griff, I’ve only recently come to realize, is my lighthouse. At the rodeo, in the bars, and even just in life. When things are tough or uncertain, it’s always Griff I’ve reached for. My heart should burst right now, but it’s heavy as I watch him work his way through the crowd towards me. All the nights I put him through watching me hook up with people, keeping me safe, when all this time it should have been him.
“Jamieson! Are you singing tonight?”
A nameless roper slaps my back a little too hard, but I smile at the mention of singing, anyway.
“You bet! Just need to figure out which one. ”
The man leans in closer and slides a hand across mine. A gesture I never would have picked up on before unless Griff pointed it out to me. Stepping away from the touch, I search for Griff again, and I meet his blue gaze only a few steps away.
When he reaches me, he slides his hand into my back pocket and presses a kiss to my lips. “You’re on your third drink, Jamie. Shouldn’t you be singing by now?”
“That’s what I said!” The nameless man grips my shoulder and leaves his hand there for an extra beat and I want to think it’s just him being friendly, but there’s more to it. When I glance at Griff, his eyebrows furrow, and there’s a spark in his blue eyes as he takes in the man’s prolonged contact.
“He’s not available, Pauly. In case the kiss didn’t give it away.” Griff almost growls, and that’s sort of hot.
Pauly laughs and removes his hand while stepping back. “Sorry, sorry. I heard you two might be a thing, but a guy can hope.”
When Pauly leaves, I turn to Griff. “You can use that voice anytime, babe. It’s hot.” Dipping my mouth next to his ear, I whisper, “I like it when you get all possessive, and I like that flush on your neck right now. Why did we come here when we should’ve gone home and gotten naked?”
Griff’s lips, so close to my ear, send a shiver down my spine. “Because you want to sing and celebrate like always, Jamie. I’ll still take you home after.”
He presses a kiss to my neck, and the only thing I want to sing right now is his name as he comes all over me.
“Follow me?”
“Always. ”
Turning on my heel, I head to the hallway towards the bathrooms. It’s cliché and not romantic, like Griff deserves, but I just want to have him to myself for a few minutes. The hall is quieter than the bar, and Giff laughs.
“You want to get off in the bathroom? Really?”
“If that accessible bathroom is open, yes. But just for a few minutes. We don’t even have to come. We just have to…”
My words trail off as we reach the bathroom in question because Hunter charges out of it like a swarm of bees is on his ass…with Gabe right after him. They both notice us and say nothing, but Gabe runs to catch up with Hunter.
“Wow. So Diamond was right about something going on with those two,” Griff says as he grabs my hand and pulls me away from the door of the bathroom. “That’s not who I am, Jamie, even with you. Let’s sing your song, then I’ll dump the rest of your drink and take you home.”
“You always take care of me, Griff,” I croak.
His smile is soft as he cups my cheek. “That will never change, Jamie.”
“I’m sorry. I never noticed how much this hurt you.”
Griff smiles and presses a kiss to my lips that lingers. “Don’t be sorry. I put myself in that position and yes, it hurt, but I kept you safe and that was far more important than my feelings.”
Resting my forehead against his, I sigh a shaky breath. “I don’t want you to do that anymore. I want to know how you feel, and I don’t want you to hurt because of me again.”
“Okay.”
“Promise me, Griff. ”
Griff nods against me and runs his hands up my chest. “I promise.”
My tongue feels thick, and the warmth of his hands on me is all I can think about. When he moves to drop his hands and step away, I grab his wrists and pull him back to me.
“I…I’m…fuck, I don’t know what I am, but I…” My heart feels broken and mended all at once, and my skin feels too tight. All I want right now is to be lost in Griff in a way I never have before. “Can you take us home?”
“Yes, of course. That’s what you want? No singing?”
“I want to be alone with you. You make me sing.”
Griff’s gaze never leaves mine, and he might as well wear a neon sign with his feelings. His throat bobs, and he gives a single nod.
“All right. I’ll take you home. Let’s go.”
We don’t pause for goodbyes, but we wave if anyone shouts or waves as we weave through the crowded bar. Once we’re outside and the late August air hits my skin, I shiver, but not with a chill.
Griff, always confident and protective, holds my hand as he fishes the key fob from his pocket and points it toward the parking lot. Lights flash as my truck comes to life, and when we reach it, he holds the door for me. He’s done it a million times before. Held the door and buckled me in and just fucking cared for me, but I don’t know why this feels so different.
Is it because I know what his dick feels like in my mouth and we’ve made each other come every morning for the past few months? What changed tonight for me to feel so out of sorts and so fucking emotional?
Griff drives us out of the parking lot, and I watch the streetlights dance over his face as we drive the short distance across town to his apartment. The one he’s moving out of soon to be with me.
“You’re moving in with me. To my house. Our house,” I blurt, and Griff huffs a laugh.
“I am. I’ll start packing this week if you want.”
“I want.”
Griff laughs low as he parks my truck on the street close to his apartment.
“You’re being weird, Jamie. What’s wrong?”
“Nothing is wrong. Not even close.”
He rounds the front of the truck and meets me, taking my hand as we walk to the back stairs up to his apartment.
“Okay. If nothing’s wrong, can you tell me why you gave up your bar singing? You love that. Tonight was a big night for you. You should celebrate.”
Griff holds the door open for me, and I step inside, kicking off my boots and grabbing him as soon as he locks the door behind us.
“I’m celebrating with you instead.”
I want Griff naked, and I don’t know how I want him after that. I just know I need to feel him against me and hear his moans. My name on his lips and his on mine as we lose ourselves to this electricity between us.
Our teeth clash and we stumble down the short hall to his bedroom, pieces of clothing left in our wake until Griff pushes me on his bed and tears my jeans and underwear off in one smooth motion.
“Fuck, you’re beautiful Jamie.” He presses a kiss on my knee. “So fucking beautiful. ”
His lips trail paths over my legs while his hands lazily roam, and I finally find the words to tell him what I want.
“I want you to make love to me, Griff.” My cheeks burn with the words. They sound so juvenile, but I don’t know what else to say. I don’t want a quickie or a hard fuck. I want Griff to crawl inside me and stay there.
“I can do that.” He presses a harder kiss on my thigh. “In fact, I’d love to do that.”
Maybe it’s the drinks I had tonight or the buzz from the rodeo ride. Or maybe it’s both, but I’ve never felt so much at one time as I do now. Every touch of his skin against mine and every breath shared between kisses feels like nothing we’ve shared before.
Griff kisses me with a passion that burns my lips and stokes a fire so deep I might combust. This is love. I get it now. Everything he’s kept inside for years pours out. This isn’t our quick frots or blow jobs, this is so much more than that.
“Lie on your side, Jamie.”
The snick of the lube cap is impossibly loud as I shift my back towards him. His firm hand taps my thigh, and I lift my leg, gasping as he slides his cock through, brushing against my balls.
Griff’s arm holds me as he moves slowly, stroking my dick. It’s agony, it’s bliss, and I feel like I’m the luckiest man in the world to have this.
“Squeeze your thighs a little tighter, Jamie,” Griff breathes next to my ear, and when I do as he asks, the answering moan is better than any shanty I could sing in a bar.
“I’m so close, babe. Fuck, that feels amazing. Don’t stop.”
There has to be a way to do this next time, so I can face him, because even though it’s an intimate act, I feel like we have an opening between us when I want none.
Griff stops moving and rests his head on my back.
“I said don’t stop,” I whine, and Griff chuckles.
“On your back. I want to kiss you when you come.”
“It’s like you read my mind.”
He spreads my legs wide and lowers himself closer. This time I’m the one trapped in the mercy of his thighs and I think I squeak in surprise as he tilts my throbbing cock back and squeezes it between his thighs.
“Wrap your legs around me.” Griff shudders when I do and I pull him as tight as I can.
Griff lowers himself over me, and I surge up to kiss him. “Holy fuck, it feels like my dick is in a vise.”
“Need me to loosen a little?”
His cock drags along my belly with every movement, and I shake my head because all language has now vanished. I’m flying.
“I got you, Jamie. I got you.”
Griff’s words are in a tunnel as I come so hard I feel like my body left Earth and crashed down harder than gravity allows. It’s only the warmth on my stomach and Griff’s words that have me tethered to earth.
“You’re shaking. Are you okay?”
Clearing my throat, I test my voice. “More than okay. I’ve never had such an incredible orgasm.” We both laugh softly, and I finally let my legs flop to the side. “For real, Griff. I’m almost sad I didn’t know sex could be so good.”
We lay there a little longer, just kissing and not caring about the mess that’s growing uncomfortable. Neither of us wants to break this perfect moment.
Until my stomach growls.
Griff drops his head to my shoulder, body quaking with laughter.
“Your pillow talk needs work.”
“You know I can’t control my stomach. If it’s hungry, it’s hungry.”
“Let’s get cleaned up, and I’ll make you mac and cheese.”
Smacking a giant kiss on his lips, I flip him onto his back. “You always know the way to my heart.”
Griff’s fingertips brush my cheek and then my lips. “I’ve never been brave enough to travel the whole way there. But now that I have, I don’t plan on ever leaving.”
“I like that plan.”
“How can you possibly think it’s okay for Donald Duck not to wear pants, but Mickey has to? It’s so bizarre.”
Griff made a giant pot of Kraft Dinner, and rather than dealing with the mess in the bedding, we took the pot of pasta, extra blankets and made ourselves comfortable on the couch for several hours watching old cartoons .
The pasta is long gone, and the cartoons are looping back to replay. Our eyes are heavy, but neither of us wants to sleep.
“The sun will rise in another hour. Want to stay up for it?” Griff’s voice slurs with exhaustion, and as much as I want to do that, I’m not sure I have the strength to stay awake longer.
“I’d love nothing more, but there’s a problem.”
“What’s that?”
“I can’t hold up my eyelids,” I whisper with a laugh.
A beat of silence passes before Griff speaks again in the same tired voice.
“Mickey has to wear pants because mice have dicks. Ducks don’t.”
“What?”
“The pants thing. It’s not bizarre. It’s dicks.”
“This conversation makes no sense. Of course, ducks have dicks.”
When he doesn’t reply, I roll my head his way and find him fast asleep with his mouth parted and his cheeks still flushed. Rather than wake him and force him to carry on with the conversation about mice and duck dicks, I decide it’s better to just let it go.
If anyone knows that kind of information, it’s Jackson. If I’m still awake in an hour, I’ll call him and ask.
After dragging the blanket over, I snuggle in next to Griff as best as I can on the couch and let the cartoons continue playing. One episode blends into the next until my eyes no longer stay open. I forget about the pants-less duck, and finally fall asleep with Griff in my arms.
In my arms, my heart, and my life.
As it should be.