Chapter 27
The more self-conscious Kalyani became, the more Varum wanted to know about her.
She was—by far—the most interesting person he had ever met.
Now, he wished he had kissed her when she challenged him.
Would she be fiery and fierce, or would she be shy and nervous as she was now? He really wanted to find out.
If Tanira hadn’t stopped by, he and Kalyani would be on their way to the surface, and he never would’ve gotten to know this side of her. The danger of her being in the city had increased, though. He wasn’t sure whether to be grateful to Tanira or not.
“I’m very boring,” Kalyani stated.
“Surely, you’ve traded with others who would allow you to venture to other villages.”
She shook her head of dark curls. “The men went, not the women. We did have some traders come to us, though.”
“It’s no wonder you sought refuge in the water,” he mused.
Her gaze quickly darted to the side before returning to him. “That isn’t why I swim.”
“Then why?”
“Because there’s an entire world beneath the surface that’s a part of Zora yet different. It’s like I’ve stepped into another realm. The plants, the animals, the very essence of the ocean that feels both vast and small at the same time.”
He nodded, understanding exactly how she felt. It was why he never wanted to leave the water—and why so many Sea Elves refused to allow outsiders into their home.
“The water feels like home,” Kalyani said. “I’m more myself when I’m swimming.”
“Yet you miss the sky.”
A wistful look came over her face. “Underwater is striking, but there is much beauty on land, as well. The soft glow of a sunrise or the sky lit up in the brilliant colors of a sunset. A clear blue sky or one filled with gray clouds right before a storm. There are the skies with the big, puffy clouds that drift lazily past, and the clouds that seem as if some god stretched them from one horizon to the other. Then there’s the night sky with its blanket of stars and the moon above.
” She paused and laughed softly. “It seems I’ve lived my life either looking up at the sky or looking down into the water. ”
“I’ve never seen the sky. I’ve never ventured close enough to the surface to get a glimpse.”
“You’re missing out,” she replied.
For the first time, Varum thought he very well might be. He leaned forward and grasped a glass before handing it to her. “It’s lumara nectar. Careful, though. It’s deceptively strong.”
She sniffed it. “What’s it made out of?”
“Coral sap and sweet kelp sugar. A warmth lingers after you swallow, and it’ll spread throughout your body.”
A look of interest flashed on her face before she took a sip. He watched her mouth against the glass. The sight of her tongue peeking out to lick her lips sent a surge of desire straight to his cock.
“This is good,” she said.
He grabbed his glass and sat back. “Take it slow. It’ll hit you hard.”
“Do I look pitiful enough that you felt the need for liquor?”
“Aye,” he lied.
She shot him a smile. “What are the odds that I’ll get to leave the city?”
“You’ll leave. Alive. I promise.”
“You can’t promise something like that.”
He tossed back the drink and leaned forward to refill it. “I can, and I do.”
“I won’t hold you to it.”
“I’ll figure out the patrol schedule. There are always cracks in things. I’ll find it, and we’ll get you home.”
She took another sip. “Hmm.”
“You don’t believe me, do you?”
“I was just thinking that I’m intruding on your living space.”
The thought of her being anywhere but in his home was like a cold band of steel wrapped around his chest. “You aren’t. Besides, I’m responsible for you.”
“Now you sound like my brother,” she said with a grin.
He certainly didn’t want to be her brother with the way he kept thinking about her mouth. “I imagine sitting here with nothing to do isn’t exactly fun.”
“Not really.”
“What do you do in Serenia?”
She took another drink and scrunched her face in thought. “I fish, cook, gather herbs, clean, and do whatever else needs to be done.”
“You do a lot.”
“Everyone pitches in.”
He watched as she finished the lumara nectar. “Want more?”
“Please,” she said eagerly.
Varum gave her another finger’s worth and added more to his own glass before sitting back. Her embarrassment from earlier was gone, and she was once more relaxed. He almost broached the subject of lovers again just to see if she would get flustered.
“I can clean and cook for you while I’m here,” she offered.
“That won’t be necessary.”
Her shoulders slumped. “I have to do something. Sitting around will make me go daft.”
“I’ll find you something, but you don’t need to take care of my things.”
“Why not? I’m living here, too—at least for the moment.”
He downed more of the nectar and waited for the warmth to spread through him. “You aren’t my maid. I’ll find you something,” he said again.
“Is Tanira pretty?”
Varum was startled by the quick change in subject. “She is.”
“Why don’t you want to be with her?”
“She asked the same thing.”
“What was your answer?”
He propped a foot on the table. “I explained that I didn’t love her, and that I couldn’t see a future with her.”
“She’s an elf everyone wants, yet you don’t.”
“If the feelings aren’t there, they aren’t there. You can’t force yourself to care for someone.”
She nodded and started to tilt to the side. He rose to help her, but she caught herself in time and chuckled. Varum sat down, but he remained on the edge of the cushion.
“Ah, but when the feelings are there, they’re sometimes obvious to everyone but the two involved,” Kalyani said.
He set aside his empty glass. “You speak from experience?”
“I do,” she said, slurring her words slightly. “Rohan tried to act all tough with Farah at first, but then he would suddenly be gentle with her. He claims he didn’t fall for her until they went on their adventure, but I think he was already under her spell as he tended to her injury.”
Varum was beginning to feel that he and Rohan had a lot in common.
He inwardly grimaced at the direction of his thoughts.
What good would it do for him to find Kalyani attractive?
They were from two different worlds, and there was no compromise for either of them.
She couldn’t live in his, and he couldn’t live in hers.
Then again, no one said that just because he took someone to his bed, he had to spend the rest of his life with them.
He pressed the heels of his hands to his eyes and struggled to turn his thoughts away from her as a lover.
“I know why she wants you. And it isn’t because you didn’t go after her.”
His head snapped up to see Kalyani’s face flushed from the alcohol.
She unfurled her legs, so her feet were on the floor, before she carefully placed her empty glass on the table. “It’s hot.”
“That’s the nectar.”
She nodded, waving her hand in front of her face.
“What were you going to say?” he pressed.
“What?” she asked, her brow furrowed in a frown.
He grinned, realizing she was drunk. “You said you know why Tanira wants me.”
“Have you looked in the mirror? You’re gorgeous.”
He could only stare at her. Did she really think that?”
“It’s more than that, though,” she added. “It’s you.”
“What’s that supposed to mean?” he asked when she didn’t elaborate.
She braced her hands on either side of herself and closed her eyes, her face lifted to the ceiling. “You have this…thing.”
“A…thing?”
She nodded exaggeratedly. “Aye. A thing. It makes you stand out from others.”
“I have no idea what you’re talking about, and I don’t think you do either. The nectar has gotten to you.”
Her eyes opened, and she shot him a scathing look. “I do, too, know what I’m talking about. You’re…” She waved a hand up and down at him. “That.”
He grinned. “I guess I am. Thank you for pointing it out.” He rose and walked to her. “I think it’s time you went to bed.”
“It’s not time.”
She didn’t fight him when he gathered her into his arms. “You can’t see the sky, remember? You don’t know what time it is.”
“That’s right,” she murmured and rested her head on his shoulder.
He stood there, cradling her in his arms. He liked the feeling of her against him, but he liked her head on him even more. “I should’ve limited you to one glass.”
“You’re honorable, kind, and generous.”
Varum was startled by her words. They had been mumbled but were distinct enough that he heard them.
She flung her arm around his neck. “You have a…a…presence others lack.”
He held her tighter. Nirav always gave him compliments, but that was what a parental figure was supposed to do. Kalyani wasn’t beholden to him, and she was drunk. Truth usually sprouted from the lips of those in their cups, so he knew she meant what she said.
And she would never know just how much those words meant to him.
Varum made his way into the bedroom, but he didn’t set her on the bed immediately. If he did, he’d have to release her, and he wasn’t quite ready for that. He could get into bed with her. If for only a little while. She would never have to know.
As much as that appealed to him, he couldn’t do that to Kalyani. He had disrupted her life by bringing her to the city. He didn’t want to make things worse by abusing her trust when she was most vulnerable. Nay, he wanted to earn that trust. He wanted to be the elf that she believed him to be.
Everything he thought he knew about humans had been wrong. Kalyani had opened his eyes to another side of her race. Her spirit, her courage. Even her compassion. She was extraordinary.
He laid her on the bed, and the minute he did, she rolled away from him onto her side.
He straightened, but he didn’t leave. Unable to help himself, he touched the silken strands of her hair.
A curl wrapped around his finger as if holding him captive, and he had to wonder if he wasn’t already spellbound by her.
Varum extracted his finger and then pulled the covers over her.
He couldn’t climb into bed with her, and he couldn’t leave her, so he did the only thing he could.
He walked to the window and opened the lattice to watch the patrols.
Varum counted the elves and the number of times they made a round while searching for weaknesses.
Kalyani would go home. He would make sure she made it out of the trench, even if it was the last thing he did.