Chapter 25
Noah
What am I doing here? My standard question to myself for almost two and a half months now. If I got one euro every time I asked it, I’d be a millionaire by now.
Maybe I should doubt myself a little less and roll with things little more. Not once has Luca rolled his eyes in annoyance when I came embarrassingly fast, or when I touched him. On the contrary, no one has ever made me feel so special. Desirable, lovable.
Luca is standing naked in front of me again, and damn, I love his body. Tall, muscular men have always been my thing, I just never thought I’d ever get close enough to a man like that to touch him. My fingertips dance across Luca’s chest, leaving goosebumps in their wake.
“Take your clothes off. Please.”
With a trembling voice, he tugs at my T-shirt, and screw it, I don’t need to understand what he sees in me.
It’s enough that he likes what he sees, and I know his cock doesn’t lie.
His cock, which feels so good against mine.
I want to touch it. Luca makes short work of my pants and boxers, then pushes me into the big shower.
“Wait, not so fast. My glasses.”
“Oh, shit, is that a problem? That you can’t see anything? I’m sorry, I didn’t think that far ahead.” Neither did I, I’ve only just realized it now, but there’s nothing I can do about it.
Without thinking twice, I hand him the frames and my world blurs. “Give me your hand, I’ll go slow.”
The powerful stream of the rainforest shower envelops us both. The water is warm, and Luca’s wet body feels amazing. I stretch up my neck in the hope of a kiss and am not disappointed.
“Where’s the shower gel?”
“Hold out your hand. Watch out, here it comes.” Luca verbally describes every single action, no matter how small, so I know what he’s doing and what’s happening. Never before have I felt as comfortable without my glasses as I do here in this moment, and my idea from earlier is taking shape.
I can do this, I can touch him. I know what I like, maybe he likes it too. My hands are on his chest, and Luca’s cock presses against my stomach. With increasingly larger movements, I spread the lather over his upper body. Chest, shoulders, then I break our contact to move to his back.
I’m still standing half behind him with my chest pressed against his side. Using my left hand, I hold on to Luca so I don’t lose my bearings. My right hand finds his belly button and slides lower.
“What are you doing?” Do I have to tell him? But he can see what I’m up to, he can just say stop. Or can’t he?
My knuckles brush against Luca’s cock and he lets out a short moan. I’m sure that with a little practice, I’ll be able to find my way around better even without my glasses, right now, I’m just groping in the dark.
“You don’t have to do this, mon Papillon.” I’d love to see his face, more than just the black shadow of his hair and the outline of his head.
“I know, but I’d like to, if you let me.” Luca’s hand reaches for mine. Startled, I flinch back, then I realize what he’s up to and loosen my grip until I can wrap my fingers around his length.
“Thank you,” I whisper into his shoulder, but I get no reply. Only a trembling moan fills the cramped space. It’s a never-ending miracle to me that someone like Luca, who’s had so much sex, still reacts so strongly to such simple touches.
With a firm grip, I work his cock. Fast and hard, with a little extra pressure around the head. I hear his breath catch, how he tries to speak, but no words come out of his mouth. Just a drawn-out moan.
His legs tremble, and his back arches. Any second now, I know it for sure. I don’t need to see him to recognize the signs. His big cock swells in my hand, and Luca presses his face into the crook of my neck.
With a stifled cry, Luca comes, thrusting into my hand. Water mixes with cum between my fingers, and even though I know he’s too sensitive to keep up this rhythm, I give him two more hard strokes.
Luca’s legs give way. I want to hold him, but he grabs me around the waist and pulls me with him. Faster than expected, we’re sitting down.
Was there a bench in the shower? My attempt to remember is interrupted by a large hand wrapped around my cock. As if by reflex, I thrust into Luca’s firm grip. “Ah, fuck, yes.”
“I’m a little confused right now, mon Papillon. I thought you preferred it gentle and tender, but after what you did to me, I’m not so sure anymore.”
Whatever, as long as you’re doing something.
I can’t hold back the whimper any longer. Damn it. “Oh, so we’re impatient now. Talk to me, and you’ll get what you want. Hard or gentle?”
“Hard.”
“Oh yeah, you’re gonna get it.” And fuck, Luca didn’t overpromise. His big hand wraps almost completely around my length, and when he presses his thumb into my slit, my head falls back.
While his right-hand jerks me off, his left plays with my nipple. He kisses, bites, and nibbles wherever he happens to reach skin. “Is that what you want, or should I stop?”
Is he messing with me?
“Don’t stop, please don’t stop. I…” I don’t finish that sentence. Instead, I come uncontrollably into his hand and onto my stomach. Pure bliss floods my body, and for a wonderful moment, I feel like I’m floating.
“Okay, mon Papillon, we need to talk.” I’m still sitting in the shower on Luca’s lap with my eyes closed. “What was that just now? I’ve always been super careful with you, but somehow I get the feeling that’s not what you want at all.”
His cock is swelling up again and pressing deliciously against my balls and my crack. How am I supposed to think straight like this?
“Can we shower first? I’d like to see you.” Purely a diversion tactic, but it works. Ten minutes later, I’m standing in Luca’s room with my glasses on and a towel wrapped around my waist.
Luca stands across from me, his gaze piercing. I don’t have to look at him to know that. “What do you want? It’s not gentle and tender, is it?”
Not in my fantasy, but I’m not sure I can handle reality yet. “I don’t know what I want. How am I supposed to know what I like if I’ve never tried it before?”
Luca lifts my chin with two fingers. “We can try almost anything you want. I just need to be sure you’ll tell me right away if you don’t like something. You don’t have to prove anything to me, okay?”
“Okay.” By now, I’ve realized how stupid that was. I was just so afraid that Luca would leave if he didn’t get what he was used to. He’s still here, even though we haven’t had sex yet.
“Wait, what do you mean by almost anything?”
“I’m not bottoming.”
That’d be totally fine with me. “Why not? Have you… have you tried it?”
“Once. With an incredibly sweet guy, but something just clicked in my head, and I started panicking as soon as we started prepping, at the very first touch. I don’t want that anymore.”
Now Luca is having a hard time maintaining eye contact. There’s more to it than that, just like there is behind the fact that he can’t sleep in the dark, or that he needs a set routine to feel at ease in the house.
Without thinking, I reach for his hand and pull him toward the bed, throw back the covers, and lie down on my side. I tap the mattress invitingly, and Luca follows my lead. He tenderly places his hand on my hip and looks me straight in the eye. “Is this a problem for you? Please say something.”
“No, no problem. Now kiss me?”