Chapter 19
MILA
“Being reckless will get you killed, Nikolai,” I mutter, trying to calm the burning inferno inside me.
“It wasn’t. I’m alive, aren’t I?”
He closes his eyes as I gently assess the wound. It’s not too bad, a bit deeper than I’d like. I resist the urge to stab my finger in it to teach him a lesson.
If I were Mila right now, I would and I’d make sure it hurt.
“Your daughter deserves better.” I know how it feels to be orphaned. She needs her daddy.
He sits himself up on his forearms with a groan and more blood drips from the wound onto the white sheets.
“Who the fuck do you think you’re talking to?” He almost growls.
I’ve touched a nerve.
Good.
Getting what I need from the kit, I have to stop myself and slow down. Melissa wouldn’t know this shit to the levels I do.
I look him dead in the eye before I speak. I’m still furious.
“I know exactly who I am speaking to. Now lay down, let me fix this and I’ll go.”
I point to the bed, motioning for him to listen to me.
His eyebrow raises, it’s almost like he’s impressed when I speak to him like this. The way he’s looking at me has my cheeks flushing.
Not just with anger either.
He does as I say and, like a good soldier, doesn’t make a peep as I stitch him up, a lot slower than I would usually. Although it's a neat job, I’ve had a few minutes to get into my head why Melissa might know this.
“Done.”
I pack it all away and scoot back.
I need some space to compose myself. Each day that passes I am getting more involved, and not just with my head.
And when the truth is revealed to both of them, I’ll have a double stab to the heart.
Looking down at the blood on my hands, I stand and back away from him.
This isn’t the first, nor will it be the last time I have blood on my hands. I just pray that it isn’t his in the future.
Except, failure isn’t an option here. My brother's life is on the line.
All the air is sucked out of my lungs as I picture his face.
I would die for him.
I can’t let my feelings get in the way.
“I-I need to get cleaned up.”
Fuck. I really am becoming my alias.
I don’t give him a chance to reply before I stumble out of his room and slam my door shut.
I almost want him to fuck this out of me. Is that the answer here?
Turning on the shower, I hold my stained hands under the stream of water waiting for it to warm up.
And it’s like a light switch flicks on in my brain.
That is the answer. It’s been there all along.
He likes me a bit wild. He wants me. He kissed me.
I can get closer to those damn diamonds if I’m his. I can probably protect him better that way too.
Wrapping a towel around me, I tiptoe back down the hall.
As his en-suite opens, a cloud of steam billows out before revealing his presence. Wiping a towel over his face and one loosely wrapped around his waist, it draws my eyes to zone in on the package tenting the material.
I clear my throat, and in response, he casually tosses the cloth to the corner.
“Can I help you?”
As I lift my eyes to his face, I see his jaw tighten and his brow raise. Jesus, he’s so hard to work out.
“M-my shower won’t get hot. Can I use yours?”
I fiddle with my thumbs awkwardly. I’m turned on again. This has felt like weeks of edging that I can’t get relief from.
He steps away from the door and motions for me to go through. Maybe this was a bad idea. The line keeps blurring when I’m in the same room as him.
Just as I’m about to enter his en-suite, he grabs my wrist and stops me. I fixate on the veins running through his arms. Shit. That was a mistake.
I squeeze my thighs tightly.
“There’s nothing wrong with the temperature of your shower,” he says with a smirk.
I blink up at him a few times.
A sense of emptiness engulfs me when he releases his grip.
“Go ahead.”
I feel his fiery gaze on me as I step onto the cool tile. My hand grabs the handle and I turn to face him.
It’s now or never.
Instead of closing it, I step back, turning away from him and dropping my wrap into a pool by my feet.
The way he tries to hide his groan has a smile tugging at my lips. I knew he felt something, that he wasn’t completely made of stone.
I step away as the shower cascades down from the ceiling, the cool spray hitting against my legs, gradually warming up. Keeping my back to him, I step under the now deliciously hot water and tip my head back, letting out a little satisfied moan.
Closing my eyes, I get the courage to turn my head to look at him.
It’s the conflict on his beautiful face that spears me through the heart. He wants this as much as I do.
But, something is holding him back. Something big rattling around in his brain.
Picking up the shower gel from the built in shelving, I don’t break eye contact as I squirt a dollop onto my palm. It smells masculine, just like him.
I should feel exposed, like I should want to hide myself.
But the way this man eats me up, the fact I can see his dick getting hard under that white towel. The reason he is still there watching. It doesn’t make me want to hide.
It makes me want to step out of the shadows and be the real Mila.
I spread the soap on my silky skin, attempting to conceal my grin, while witnessing the subtle movement of his jaw, ticking with tension.
“Hey, Nikolai. Would you be able to reach this spot on my back, I can’t get it?” I say, dramatically trying to reach between my shoulder blades, which pushes my full breasts up.
He clears his throat and mutters under his breath, just quiet enough for me not to quite catch it.
“No.”
He runs a hand over his face, turns, and walks away, leaving me completely and utterly deflated. .
Another failure. I can’t crack him. But, I have to. For my brother.
And, ultimately, for myself. I need to know what it would feel like to let this man loose on me for one night.