Chapter 35 Harry
Harry
Ireturned to the bedroom after washing myself. I tugged Dom’s shirt over my head, pulling it down far enough to cover myself. Though it was too tight around the middle, he seemed to appreciate it. He gave me a smouldering look until I asked him the question I still needed the answer to.
“So did you ever plan to actually tell me about Molly’s phone, or were you just hoping I wouldn’t figure it out?”
He grimaced as I approached the bed. He’d grabbed beers from the kitchen while I was in the bathroom, and he handed me one as I sat on the edge.
“I mean, yeah, I was going to tell you at some point…”
“You’re such a liar. It wasn’t like it was going to suddenly disappear when Molly came back.”
“Well, I was just waiting for the right moment…” I arched a brow as we both took a drink, but he didn’t avoid my gaze. “I’m sorry. I was kind of hoping that you wouldn’t find out and it would be a secret I carried to my grave.”
“And you’d never tell me how you felt about me?”
“Well, I hid my feelings pretty well, so I thought I could just bury them.”
I furrowed my brow, tilting my head. “Do you realise how stupid that is? You’re as bad at hiding your feelings as I am, especially when you hit on me non-stop and kissed me.”
Dom sighed heavily, but I still edged closer to him.
Part of me, the dumb part, wanted to comfort him as pain creased his face.
“I know… I fucked up so fucking badly. If you ever want to kick me out, or get rid of me, or if you just want space to yourself, literally bring that up and I’ll fuck off for however long you need. ”
“Now it just sounds like you’re avoiding our relationship.” I reached out my hand, taking Dom’s, and rubbing my thumb in slow circles as I searched for the right words. “I came here for you, Dom. I wouldn’t have broken up with Molly if I didn’t want to at least try something.”
It was satisfying to watch the shock whip through him as his hand tightened around mine. “You broke up?” he asked hoarsely, and I chuckled.
“You didn’t think to ask me that as you went for me. Though I guess it doesn’t really matter to you in the end,” I said, glaring at him. I could have told him as soon as he walked in, but I was too wrapped up in him as well.
“I wanted to be close to you again since I thought everything was over, so I just kind of went crazy.” He gave me a sheepish look as I sighed loudly. “I thought if I could get your body fixed on me, then your heart would follow.”
I shook my head before I took a long drink. I didn’t look at him as I gritted my teeth; all dark emotions that had been skulking in me since I found out were rearing their heads again.
“You honestly chose the most painful path for both of us,” I said quietly as I turned back to him. “We could have gone about it in so many different ways, but you just decided to go big and make it as messy as possible.”
“I never said I was doing it correctly or being smart about it.”
“Dom, if you had just told me the truth the morning you deleted her email, I could have told you she’d broken up with me before she left for Norway.”
The bed creaked as Dom leaned forward, putting aside his beer. “She broke up with you? You mean this whole time you weren’t even together?”
“At least not to her. You gave me hope for a relationship that didn’t exist. Do you understand how cruel that is? I was fighting with my desire to be close to her while discovering how I really felt for you.”
More pain flared on his face as he shuffled closer. “I’m sorry,” he said, his voice cracking. “I’m so sorry, Harry. I know how fucked up it was, even when I was doing it. But I just wanted to be closer to you.”
“You’re one of the people who means the most in the world to me, Dom. You didn’t need to hide behind texts like that. How the hell did you even get Molly’s phone in the first place?”
“It was an accident, I swear. I just picked it up by mistake at her going-away party, and then I was off my face the first time we sexted.”
“None of that makes it better.”
“It really doesn’t,” he chuckled. “And the rest of that was totally my choice. I can’t blame that on anyone except me.
I’ll keep apologising about that forever if you want me to, handsome.
I’ll say sorry a thousand times a day. I just want to be with you, that’s all.
If I can lie in bed like this and hear you breathing next me, and share meals together, and do everything we used to, except I get to love you, then I can make sure the only words I ever say from now on are sorry.
” He’d edged close enough that he pressed himself against me.
Still naked, cock half-hard, it wasn’t the best position to be in when I was trying to clear the air, but he wasn’t hitting on me or trying to distract me. Not yet, anyway.
“I’ll have to decide later. I quite like it when you desperately call my name because you want to come.”
His gaze flashed, and I hoped I knew that look better than anyone. I initiated it though, and I think that made him even more eager, but I still had things to say.
“I refuse to say thank you, but you gave me the push I needed to break up with Molly. I wouldn't have made that change, even after she broke up with me. Though you had to do it in the most fucked up way you could think of.”
He chuckled as he wrapped his arms around me, though heaviness swirled in my gut.
“You seriously would have married her? After everything you've told me about your arguments and literally ending things with you, you would have just carried on, business as usual?”
“Maybe,” I replied after a beat. “It was just too much to change.
Three years of loving each other is a lot to suddenly give up.
And I was comfortable, even though she stressed me out a lot.
We had our routine and I didn't want to lose that. But who knows what might have happened when she got back?”
Dom sighed as he pressed his chin against my shoulder. I hadn't failed to notice how he was slowly blanketing me with his bare skin.
“I love you, handsome, but you can be seriously stupid sometimes. Not as bad as me, but still… If you'd told me she'd broken up with you and you were still going to get married, even without me and the phone stuff, you could bet your ass I'd drag you out of there.”
“Without using your cock?”
“I'd make the sacrifice, dammit!” he said as he nipped my shoulder before tracing his lips to my neck.
I turned my head, letting him nuzzle my cheek as I sighed. “Maybe her leaving was too much… I don't know how I would have felt if you hadn't texted me. I just didn't want to lose what I had with her.”
“And what about now?” he asked. I met his sincere gaze, and he was definitely close enough to kiss.
“I'm glad. Not about the process, but I realised I don't want to lose you, more than anyone in my life.”
Dom's response was to curl his fingers around the back of my neck, easing me nearer as I sank into his kiss.
His softness was different to the force he'd taken me with at other times, and I fell for it immediately.
I relaxed under him, and I didn't notice where his other hand was going until he plucked my beer bottle from my hand.
Dom’s kisses grew deeper, our moans carrying us away. Each sweep of his tongue sent me deeper into pleasure, my cock growing hard as he crept even closer, almost sitting on my lap while he hummed.
He pulled back, and I knew what he was going to say, but I got there first.
“So you honestly thought sending me a vibrator during the Summer Gala was the best way to go?” I asked.
He instantly froze as I tilted my head. He groaned as he rolled his eyes.
“I'd pretty much lost it by that point.”
“Clearly.”
“I was going to come to your room and finish the job, if that helps?”
“It doesn't,” I replied flatly.
“How about I do something to make it up to you?” he asked, reaching behind him to swipe a condom off the bed.
“I’m, er… I’m still a bit…” I cleared my throat, and I could feel myself flushing. “Tender,” I murmured.
“This isn’t for me,” he chuckled before he ripped it open with his teeth. “Lean back, handsome. Let me show you something good.”