16. Sixteen
16
SIXTEEN
I glared at Ruby across the casino floor. Days after our shopping trip, I remained mad. Sure, I was still taking her catered lunches—Livvie reminded me that she was going to have to push out a baby with my big head every chance she got—but I was mad.
No, I was insulted.
How could she not remember the orgasms? Sure, in the haze of the morning after, I could forgive her being confused. I was confused that morning too.
I never forgot the orgasms though. I pretended to in the moment—beating my chest like King Kong and claiming myself as the sexual god of the casino would’ve been in poor taste—but I never truly forgot.
How could Ruby?
“What’s with that face?” Cal Preston, my second-in-command, asked as he joined me near the cashier station.
“Hmm?” I dragged my eyes from Ruby, who was yukking it up with a handful of servers, and focused on his face. “Do you need something?”
“Yeah, I want to know why you’re making that face.” Cal had an easygoing nature. He often made jokes about my luck with the women who came into the casino—all the single ones somehow made up an excuse to talk to me, or even take a selfie with me—but he was no slouch in that department even though he wasn’t as good looking as me. He said that, not me. I didn’t make it a habit to go around judging my employees by their looks.
“I wasn’t making a face,” I lied, darting a look toward Ruby. Under the muted lights of the casino floor—they were designed to keep the guests guessing about the time of day so they didn’t leave to enjoy prime gambling time on the strip—she looked even more breathtaking than usual. How was that even possible? She spent half her time complaining about not being able to sleep because our daughter was doing handsprings on her bladder and yet she looked like a dream.
My dream to be exact.
Except my dream would never forget the orgasms. What was the matter with her? She was messing with me. There could be no other explanation.
“I was just running through a to-do list in my head,” I said finally. “We have another convention coming in tomorrow.”
“Yes, the unidentical identical twins convention.” Cal bobbed his head. “I’m not even sure how something like that works. Is it like when one twin gets fat and the other doesn’t?”
I shrugged. “I guess. I don’t know.” My gaze was drawn back to Ruby. She’d moved on from the servers and was talking to one of the bartenders. Link Barton. He had flowing blond hair—dude seriously thought he was Farrah Fawcett or something—and muscles for days. My understanding was that he did quite well with the single ladies, although he made sure to keep his antics off the Stone Casino grounds. I hated him on principle alone, especially when Ruby threw her head back and laughed.
“She looks good,” Cal said out of nowhere.
“Who?” I was uncertain who he was talking about until he inclined his head toward Ruby.
“Oh.” I nodded. “Yeah, she looks great.” There wasn’t a lot of enthusiasm attached to the statement. “She always looks great, though.”
“She does,” Cal agreed. “I guess that’s why you got in there with your super sperm, huh?”
Super sperm? “Um…” It wasn’t that people didn’t know I was the father of Ruby’s baby. We’d agreed that hiding the information was stupid. Word was going to get out. The casino was like a small town. Everybody knew everybody’s business. Nobody really gossiped about it, though. At least with me. I had no doubt they gossiped in their free time. Nobody brought it up to me, however, which I appreciated.
Cal was apparently going to be the sacrificial lamb when it came to that particular slaughter.
“I’m just saying,” Cal continued as if he didn’t have a care in the world. “You must have some super sperm for it to bust right through the condom the way it did.”
Was that the story that was spreading? I could see that. Somebody had probably made that assumption—a broken condom wasn’t unheard of—and then they’d all run with it. I had no intention of setting the record straight. It wasn’t just that I looked irresponsible, no matter how drunk, for not wearing a condom. Frankly, it was nobody’s business.
“Pregnancy sure does look good on her, though,” Cal mused. He was staring at Ruby as if she was the last porterhouse at the steakhouse. “People say that pregnant women glow, and she does. If you listen to my mother, pregnancy was the worst thing that happened to her. Ruby looks happy, though.”
She did look happy. Sure, she was a little bigger around the midriff, but the weight looked good on her. Heck, everything looked good on her, including the cleavage she was rocking these days. Okay, her cleavage was always out of this world. Like … really, really amazing. Her boobs were almost twice as big as they had been the night we lost our heads, and they weren’t small to begin with.
“Stop drooling over her,” I ordered before I realized I was going to say anything. “She’s not a piece of meat.”
Rather than being properly chastised, or even embarrassed, Cal smirked. “Okay. Sorry.” He held up his hands. “I didn’t realize it had gotten to that point.”
My brow furrowed. “What point?”
“You know … the point where you’re absolutely gone over your baby mama.”
“Um … I’m not gone over her. Why would you even think that?” It wasn’t that I was offended at the thought—I would be lucky to have Ruby—but I didn’t want those sorts of rumors spreading. Ruby and I were determined to raise the baby as friends. Nothing more.
Cal finally caught on that I was irritated and began to squirm. “I … um … it’s nothing.” He flashed a smile that didn’t touch his eyes. “I didn’t mean anything by it. I was just thinking that maybe…” He stopped himself and straightened. “You know what? Forget I said anything.”
My temper got the better of me. Under normal circumstances, I would’ve let it go. These were far from normal circumstances, however. “Listen, if you and the other little gossip hounds want to giggle over cocktails and make fun of the situation, I can’t stop you. Ruby should be treated with respect, though, so knock whatever it is that you’re doing—including the ogling—off.”
Cal’s expression was impossible to read. He stared at me, hard, then nodded. “Sure, boss. Sorry. I didn’t realize that it was going to bother you so much.” He looked appropriately apologetic. “I’ll tell everybody to stop gossiping. It’s not respectful.”
We both knew that was an unreasonable request. Gossip was part of the human condition. It was normal—even healthy sometimes—to gossip. I wasn’t in the mood today, though. “I don’t care what you say about me,” I replied. “Just don’t say anything about Ruby. She’s creating human life out of thin air for crying out loud.”
My response—over the top and ridiculous—had Cal fighting a grin. “I’m not sure that’s exactly how it works, but I’ll do my best,” he said. “Um … I’m going to make my rounds.”
“Yeah.” I waved him off and went right back to glaring at Link, who was clearly telling some story to Ruby because she looked engrossed and enamored with whatever he was saying. “I’ll see you around. I should make my rounds too.”
TWENTY MINUTES LATER, I WAS IN THE exact same spot. No rounds had been made. No happy head bobs had been exchanged with the other workers. Everybody was giving me a wide berth. That probably had something to do with the surly look on my face. Even though I told myself not to sit there and glower, the more I watched Link work his magic on Ruby, the more furious I got.
Just who does he think he is? He’s not the resident lothario, that’s for sure. He shouldn’t be hitting on a pregnant woman. Actually, he shouldn’t be hitting on anybody. He has a job to do, and it doesn’t involve telling ridiculous stories to my girl and making her giggle.
My girl? Where had that come from? When had I started thinking like that?
There was definitely something wrong with me. Maybe I was getting sick. I’d never heard of an illness that made men think delusional thoughts about the women carrying their children, but it was probably some jungle sickness. Yeah, that made sense.
My emotions were getting tangled, and the rational part of my brain kept tripping over the vines. The more I watched Ruby talk to Link, the angrier I got. I was one blown gasket away from marching over there, grabbing that stupid blond hair, and yanking him out of the casino. In my head, he was going to fly fifty feet when I threw him out the front door. Yeah, that was a good picture.
“What’s with that evil smile?” Zach asked as he joined me. I hadn’t even seen him crossing the casino floor, so I was surprised when he moved to stand next to me, crossing his arms over his chest to match my stance and staring out toward the bar. “Are you plotting against my sister?” He sounded alarmed.
“Of course not.” I shook my head. “I would never plot against your sister. I respect her more than I’ve ever respected anybody.”
“Because she has to push a baby with your big head from her vagina?”
I glared at him. “How much time do you and my sister spend together?” I knew darned well who was feeding him that image. “My head is not that big.”
“I didn’t think so either, but last night Livvie put on a little show for me. She brought paper plates out to demonstrate what ten centimeters dilated looks like. Do you want to know?”
His tone told me I didn’t. “What does ten centimeters have to do with anything?” I was honestly confused.
“That’s how far women dilate when they give birth.”
I wasn’t good when it came to centimeters. “And what is that in inches?”
“Four.”
I extended my fingers to my best estimation of four inches and frowned as I pictured the area in question. “There’s no freaking way.”
He laughed, which smoothed some of the rough edges I’d been feeling. “That’s what I said. She claims there are videos.”
“Why is she watching birthing videos?” I was instantly suspicious.
“Because Ruby has been sending them to everybody in the text chain. I guess she’s been watching them nonstop.”
“Huh.” I didn’t know what to make of that. On one hand, I could see wanting to be prepared for what was to come. Ruby liked lists and research. It wasn’t surprising that she was watching birthing videos. On the flip side, she was going to drive herself crazy picturing stuff like that. Now that I knew, I was going to drive myself crazy too. “That has to hurt, right?”
“I’m pretty sure that giving birth is the single most excruciating thing the human body can undergo. Like … I’m sure there are other things that are worse—certain torture techniques and whatever—but those are out of the norm. Women give birth every single day. Heck, every single second of every day.”
My stomach clenched. “Why are you putting this picture in my head?”
He shrugged. “Because my wife put it in my head. I think she wants me to be aware before we decide to do it for ourselves. She’s made it clear she expects gifts if she’s going to push my big head out of her loins.”
“Don’t say ‘loins’ when referring to my sister. I’ll have to kill you.”
“Yeah, wife trumps sister.”
I pinned him with a dark glare. “Do you want me talking about your sister’s loins?”
“Definitely not.” He looked horrified at the thought. “You’re going to see that, though. I mean … soon. A pregnancy is forty weeks. Ruby is rounding the corner on twenty-six weeks. That only leaves fourteen weeks.”
“Thanks for doing the math for me.” My tone was sarcastic. “I don’t know what I would do without my human calculator.”
Zach smiled, but his eyes remained on the bar. “Ruby and Link seem to be having a good time. What is up with that guy’s hair?”
“He looks like an idiot,” I replied without looking. I didn’t need to see that again. I was already irritated.
“Livvie says his hair makes him look like a surfer dude and that appeals to some women.”
“Do you and my sister sit around talking about the hotness of all of our workers?” I was trying to get under his skin. Apparently, it didn’t work.
“Actually, we do.” He bobbed his head. “We’re not allowed to gauge the hotness of the female workers, though. It’s a bit of a double standard. She claims Link is the hottest guy in the casino.”
“He looks like he could be an extra on Charlie’s Angels . The old show, not those weird movies that came out when we were teenagers.”
Zach merely shrugged. “I can see it.” He cocked his head as he went back to looking at Link and Ruby. “He has a good personality too. Look at the way my sister is laughing. Maybe he’ll be Rexanne’s stepfather or something. That would be weird.”
I was moving before I realized what I was doing and grabbed the front of his shirt. “That is never happening,” I hissed.
Zach and I had gotten in our fair share of scrapes as kids. That’s normal when dealing with boys, whether prepubescent or teenagers. We would fight, knock each other around, and then be over it. I had never gotten this handsy with him as an adult, however.
“Take a breath.” Zach grabbed my fingers and carefully extricated them from his shirt. To my utter surprise, he was grinning. “Just … in and out. Maybe you should take up yoga to ease that temper of yours.”
Why was he smiling? Why did he think this was funny? “This isn’t a joke,” I growled.
“Obviously not.” He cocked his head. “Have you considered telling my sister you’re in love with her?”
I made a sputtering noise and reflexively released my hold on him. “What are you even talking about? That is the most ludicrous thing I’ve ever heard.” I wasn’t in love with Ruby. Why would he even think that?
“Okay, maybe love is a stretch,” he conceded, holding up his hands in supplication. He smiled at a server as she passed. Nothing to see here, move along. That’s what his expression said. He was intense when he turned back to me, though. “Whether you want to admit it or not, you have feelings for Ruby.
“Now, it’s possible that seeing her pregnant and knowing you’re the one who got her into that state is filling you with unexpressed testosterone,” he continued. He smiled as Cal stopped a good twenty feet away and stared at us. He didn’t stop smiling until Cal started walking again. “It’s also possible that all the time you’ve been spending together has drummed up real feelings.”
“We’re raising the baby as friends,” I insisted. Frustration the likes of which I’d never felt before flooded me. “We don’t feel that way about each other.”
“I think maybe you do.”
“We don’t,” I snapped loudly enough that several heads in the general vicinity turned in our direction. I didn’t care about the guests—nothing was going to stop them from feeding the slot machines—but the fact that Ruby and Link were now looking at us bugged me. I had to force myself to calm down. “We’re raising a baby, and that’s it.”
Zach should have let it go. He didn’t, though. He kept pushing. “Yes, that’s why you take her lunch every day and sit and go over lists with her.”
“We’re having a baby. Those lists are necessary.”
He made an exaggerated face. “Oh, please. Ruby has more lists going than she’ll ever need. You’re placating her because you know it keeps her calm, and you’re not just doing that for the baby. You’re doing it for Ruby too.”
I was suddenly uncomfortable. “No.” I vehemently shook my head. “I don’t … no. We’re friends.” I was going to stick to that narrative until the day I died even though I wasn’t certain it was true any longer.
No, I recognized that the high point of my day was taking lunch to Ruby. My favorite hour was the one we spent together going over her lists. A lot of the time we laughed at how rigid she was when laying things out. Other times we laughed just because we enjoyed spending time together.
That didn’t change the fact that a relationship was out of the question. If we tried and failed, then things would be uncomfortable forever. I didn’t want to fail. Mostly, I didn’t want to fail Ruby. She deserved more, and I was incapable of giving her more.
Wasn’t I?
Zach remained calm. “Just think about it,” he prodded. “I’m not telling you what to do. Just … think about what you’re feeling, because if you keep at it like you are, you’re going to kill any guy who even looks at her going forward, and that’s not going to be a very healthy environment for the baby.”
My stomach was in knots. “We’re just friends,” I insisted. Apparently, that was my mantra now. “That’s how it’s going to stay.”
“Okay.” Zach took a step away from me. “If that’s what you want, then it’s none of my business.”
“It is none of your business.” I was definitely surly now.
“Except she’s my sister and you’re my best friend and I want both of you to be happy. You don’t look very happy.”
And wasn’t that the understatement of the year?