Chapter 7
Chapter
Seven
Michelle
Ten weeks pregnant
“ U gh,” I say, watching the numbers tick up as the elevator climbs. “I always thought women were exaggerating when they said they always have to pee when pregnant. Lesson learned, it’s true! Decades of women aren’t lying to us ... about this.”
Jax tries and fails to hold in a giggle. “I mean, you also drank about a liter of water on the ride over here.”
“Well, pregnancy is full of contradictions! Stay hydrated, but even if you don’t, you’ll still pee all the time.” I try to send her a stern look while I talk, but end up giggling, too.
“Ugh, okay, one more trip to the bathroom, and hopefully, I’ll be able to pretend to not be pregnant for a while. Remind me, does Preston know we were on baby business?”
“Yes, but I told him if anyone asks to say you had an appointment and needed a second set of ears. All that time in politics has made him good at being vague.”
The doors of the elevator slide open, and we walk out of the vestibule onto the rooftop, a soft breeze whispering through my hair. “See, my mother would say what he’s actually good at is lying, and he doesn’t need politics to do that. He’s born with it by being a man.”
Jax reaches down to squeeze my hand. “That might be an anecdote for your therapist, not for a party.” Her words have a teasing lilt to them, and I know if I actually needed to talk about the way pregnancy is twisting up feelings about my mom, she’ll listen. She already has, more times than she should need to, in the last few weeks. My therapist found a slot for me to bump up to weekly sessions starting this week, so I’ll have another outlet soon.
“A good note. This is why you’re the writer, and I read off a teleprompter.”
“I mean, you write those forecasts and then read them.”
“And have them approved ahead of time by an old white man,” I grumble. “Okay, see, there I go again. I’m going to the bathroom now and when I come out, I will be a less grumpy, more charming Michelle.”
Jax points around the corner. “My bathroom sense is tingling and saying it’s around that corner there.”
“I’m so glad you use your powers for good and not evil.” Jax lives with irritable bowel syndrome and has developed an uncanny knack for finding a bathroom in a place she’s never been before.
“Toilets might say otherwise,” she says with a wink before shooing me. “Didn’t you really have to pee?”
The urge comes back, stronger than before, and I speed walk my way around the corner, saying a quick thanks when I find it unoccupied. I take a quick moment of peace to check my email. Ignore the one from my boss. Star the follow up from the baby proofing consult Jax and I did this afternoon, gifted by Laurel and Caitlin frighteningly fast after I told them the news. Apparently, Caitlin “knew someone.” I swipe through more junk, before an email from Tinder pauses my thumb. Subject Line: Lonely Long Weekend? It doesn’t have to be. Reactivate today. A huff of a laugh escapes before I swipe it into trash too. It’ll be a good long time before I’m ready to swipe on profiles instead of emails. Maybe eighteen years plus thirty weeks.
After I wash my hands, I tug on my dress. My body doesn’t look much different yet. I’ve gotten questions if I was pregnant long before the two lines on the backup tests appeared. People don’t know how to handle themselves when women’s bodies don’t conform to “normal” standards. I know I can’t hide being pregnant forever. But along the same lines of people not keeping their opinions about my body to themselves, I know intrusive inappropriate questions will be lobbed my way on the regular once people find out. I’m not ready.
I swing the door open and jump to find Jax leaning against the wall. “You jinxed me,” she teases. “Preston’s right around the corner talking to Hayden and Hayden’s girlfriend, Charlotte. He’ll protect you until I’m done.” With that, she locks herself in the bathroom.
Sometimes, it’s easy to forget Jax and I have only known each other for ten weeks. A personal crisis each can do that for a friendship. But it also means I don’t know all of her people yet. She promised she wouldn’t abandon me when I tried to beg off coming tonight, making a case I can’t hide away for the next thirty weeks.
I spot Preston, as promised, by the snack table. My eyes scan the rest of the crowd while I walk, seeing if there’s anyone else I know when I hear it. A laugh I last heard right next to my ear, from the pillow beside me. My head whips toward the sound, and I stop dead when I see the man Preston’s talking to. He looks exactly like ... I shake my head and blink my eyes a few times. A man by the grill yells “Hayden,” and the guy who looks just like my Bonnie, RidgeMan93, lifts his beer in acknowledgment. The arm he raises is bare of both sleeves and tattoos, and my heart sinks when I realize it can’t be him .
Preston spots me and comes over to give me a hug. “While it’s the two of us, how did the appointment go?”
I force myself to focus on the man in front of me instead of staring at the one-night stand lookalike apparently named Hayden. “It was great. Really helpful. They reassured me the second room is plenty big enough for everything the baby needs for at least a few years. In my rational mind, I knew it would be, but it’s helpful to hear from experts. They also ...” I trail off as I take in Preston’s face. The features seem more familiar now than they ever did before.
“Also?” He prompts me to continue.
“Also recommended everything I would need to make the place baby proof.” I finish my train of thought. “All in all, really helpful.”
“Well, that’s great,” Preston says. “I’m glad you can stay put. I know moving is stressful enough without everything else. At least it’s not twins, huh?”
At the word “twins,” my spine stiffens, remembering something Jax mentioned about the Brandt brothers. Preston confirms it an instant later.
“Luckily, Mom and Dad already had two kids’ worth of stuff when Hayden and Hunter came along. Hey, you okay? You’re pale all of a sudden. Do you need some water?”
“Sure, that would be great. Do you mind grabbing me some? I think I need to go to the bathroom again.” Somehow, I manage to not sputter like my brain is exploding, which it absolutely is. Preston walks away, presumably to get me water, because he follows through like that. I race around the corner and find the “In Use” placard on the lock.
“Jax?” I call through the door.
“Be right out,” she replies.
I rest my back against the wall. The door opens a few seconds later and Jax comes to stand in front of me.
“Shit, Michelle, are you okay? You look like a ghost.”
I laugh, wincing at the slightly hysterical nature of the sound. “ You and Preston are really meant for each other. He’ll be finding us with water in a second. But first, the day we met, we went to brunch and then that lingerie store. Was Hunter in town?”
Jax thinks for a moment, a confused look on her face. “Yeah, actually he was. He came to the river clean up earlier that day. Why?”
I laugh again, this one tinged with a little bit of a sob. “It’s a really fucking small world, that’s why. We better go out before Preston comes looking.”
“Wait. Do you think ... Hunter is the father?” she whisper yells, starting after me.
“I about had a heart attack when I heard Hayden’s laugh out there. My heart definitely stopped when I saw the person the laugh belongs to. Then Preston reminded me Hayden has a twin. So, unless there’s a third Brandt brother who looks exactly like them, I think there’s a really good chance.”
“Michelle,” Jax whisper screams again as we round the corner. “Hunter is?—”
I come to a dead stop when I catch sight of the tattooed, beautiful man who’s been haunting my dreams and changed my life so irrevocably without knowing it. He’s back lit by the sunset, but there’s still enough light for me to know he sees me too.
“Here,” Jax finishes, coming to a dead stop next to me. “Is that him? Your one-night stand?” she mutters out of the side of her mouth?
I swallow. “Yup.”
Clyde, real name Hunter, makes his way across the roof toward us, moving like I might be a mirage in danger of disappearing if he can’t get to me fast enough. I panic and yank Jax’s arm, moving us back toward the bathroom.
“You know, there are parties I spend all night in the bathroom for, but this is really different,” she jokes, staring at the door I lock behind us. I’m starting to have trouble catching my breath, hearing myself wheeze. Jax jumps into action, grabbing one of the sanitary napkin bags next to the toilet. “Here, breathe into this. It’s going to be okay.”
I breathe in and out for a few beats until finally my breathing returns to normal. My eyes close and I slump against the wall.
“He’s a good guy, Mich. They all are.”
A tear trickles down my cheek as I roll my head to meet her gaze. “I’m not sure even good guy prepares you for, ‘Hi, it’s Hunter, isn’t it? I’m Michelle, and by the way, I’m carrying our baby.’”
“It’s a lot. I won’t pretend it isn’t. But there’s a first time for everything. I think the Brandts could manage to surprise your mom.”
That gets a snort laugh out of me. “I don’t think that’s possible. And fuck, he’s younger than Preston, right? He is. Preston said there were already two sons when the twins were born. Preston’s younger than me, which means ...”
“One thing at a time. Keep breathing. The first thing is we have to open that door, and you have to say something to him. Why don’t you start with hi? Because with the look on his face when he saw you, he’s not going anywhere without talking to you.”
I groan. “Why isn’t there a window in this thing we can crawl out of?”
“Because you’re not Rachel Green. This is real life, and we’re hundreds of feet in the air.”
“You and your logic. Okay.” I walk to the sink and dab under my eyes with a paper towel and run my fingers through my hair. “Let’s do this.”
Deep breath in, deep breath out, and I open the door. Hunter’s there, leaning against the wall, one foot propped against the brick. My eyes go immediately to his arms, eyes tracking from his wrists where he’s stuck his hands into his pockets, up to the colored ink as it disappears underneath his shirt sleeve .
When I can’t put it off any longer, I look to his face and find his eyes waiting for mine. He pushes off the wall and moves to me.
“I’m ... going to go find Preston about some water,” Jax says, peeling off and leaving us alone. When she’s safely behind Hunter, she pauses to give me a wink and a double thumbs up before disappearing around the corner.
We stand in silence until I think I might scream.
“So, you’re a Brandt,” I say, at the same time his says, “I can’t believe you’re here.” Guess the quiet bothered him too.
“Wait, you know my last name? That’s a stupid question. You know my brother’s fiancée or ... well ...”
“Whatever they are now,” I finish, a soft smile breaking through despite my nerves. “So yes, I do. And your first name too. Hunter. Hi.”
“Hi. You know, this seems unfair. You don’t have to call me Bonnie anymore, but?—”
“Michelle. Lewis. I’m Michelle Lewis,” I say in a rush. It suddenly feels so wrong to live in a world where this man doesn’t know my real name.
“Michelle. It suits you.” He pulls a face. “I’m not sure why I said that. What the fuck does that even mean?” He laughs nervously.
“Well, what came first for you, the name or the fascination with deer?” I nod toward the solid black four-legged animals with horns standing in front of shaded trees blended into the designs on his left arm.
He looks down. “This was one of the first parts of this arm’s sleeve. A reminder to balance the instincts of the hunter with the innocence of the hunted.” He meets my eyes again, the glacial blue clear with honesty. So much for a joke to break the ice.
I take a step back, wondering how there can be so little air when we are standing in the open evening. The sky shifts into twilight. Hunter takes a step forward .
“How are you here right now?” he asks.
“Well, I’m here in DC because I got a job I couldn’t turn down I now hope I don’t grow to hate.” He shakes his head with a chuckle as he takes another step toward me and my back meets the bathroom door. At least he still finds me a little bit funny. “But I’m here tonight because my cousin Laurel works with Preston and Jax.”
He nods, stretching his hand out to brush his fingers through the hair above my shoulder. “Sorry, I should have asked if it’s okay if I touch you. But I ...” He takes a shuddery breath in. “I needed to know you were real.”
My hand reaches up without a conscious instruction from my brain and cups his cheek. He leans into it, the warmth of his skin tingling up the length of my arm. “I know the feeling.”
“Michelle, listen?—”
“Hunter!” A call comes from the main rooftop area. It sounds like Hayden. Hunter swears and steps back before his twin appears around the corner. “Oh!” Hayden sounds surprised to find us both back here. “Uh, it’s our turn for beer pong. You coming?”
Hunter looks at me, his eyes searching for something, before answering his brother. “I’ll be there in a minute.”
My heart plummets. Wanting to know I’m real and wanting to spend time with me are two different things. My mind searches for a way to get his number, imagining being able to call him with the news after he’s back ... wherever he lives.
“Look, I promised Hayden we’d play together. It’s been years since we’ve had the chance. But I’d love to spend more time with you. But not here surrounded by a majority of my family. Can I see you tomorrow? We have a whole thing planned on Sunday and I fly home Monday, but I can get out of tomorrow.”
I nod, my heart skipping in my chest when it shoots back up and lodges itself firmly in my throat instead. Tomorrow. If I want to tell him in person, I have to figure out how to do it—and find the nerve—in the next twenty-four hours. No biggie .
“Here. I’ll put my number in your phone?” He says it like a question. I see doubt written on his face.
“Yes. Let’s do that.” I find my voice. “Give me yours, and I’ll give you mine too.”
We swap phones and type for the next few seconds. Our hands brush as we trade back, and my fingers tingle from the brief contact.
“I’ll see you tomorrow then. Let me pick a place? I’d ... I’d love to take you somewhere nice. Anything you don’t eat?”
“Sushi and soft cheese,” I say without thinking. Hunter’s face stays mercifully blank, and I throw up a thanks none of the other brothers have procreated yet.
“Very specific. No sushi and no picnics. Got it.”
“Hunter!” Hayden yells again, more impatient this time.
“I gotta go before he causes a scene. And to think he’s the older twin.” Hunter steps forward and wraps me in a brief hug, stepping back again before I can react. “Tomorrow,” he says, making it sound like a promise as he backs away from me. I nod in response once more.
“Tomorrow,” I say to myself, reeling from the last twenty minutes. Maybe Preston is on to something with that water thing.
I’m hit with the sudden urge to lie down and know it’s time to leave. At this point, if I stay, I’ll only end up staring at Hunter the rest of the night and making it weird.
I leave the little bathroom alcove for the last time and make my way to the elevator lobby. I hit the down button and look at the table sitting below the metal panel. Sitting on it is a bottle of water, resting on a napkin that says, “Michelle.” My eyes start to water again and I look through the glass door. Jax is standing there smiling and makes the universal sign for call me before turning back to her group, not wanting to draw attention I’m leaving not all that long after we arrived.
The doors ding open, and I step on, unlocking my phone to call a ride share car to get home. I can’t stomach the Metro right now. My phone screen lights up, displaying a new contact card. The name above the number reads Bonnie with a few mountain emojis and a deer emoji. A smile so big breaks across my face. I’m glad I’m alone so I’ll never need to explain it. Whatever happens tomorrow, I can’t help but be glad life brought us back to each other.