Chapter Thirty-One
Remy
“I’ve learned a lot watching the family find mates.
” I glance toward the house and grin. “They love hard. Many of them had qualities that humans would find unredeemable, but those are the same elements that make them excellent mates.” I look at her.
“I am the same. I’ve killed humans and shifters.
Jenica wanted to kill you for no reason.
In the journey to find Lawson, I shifted and killed a human.
All of us shed blood while searching for him, and we lose no sleep over it.
I will kill anyone who hurts you, just as all the family will defend their mates, and the world they built here.
We protect what belongs to us. You have four mates who won’t just bend the rules the humans say they live by; we break them.
” I turn on the seat. “You are our reason for everything.
That's the reason we're messed up about Jenica. We consider it our job to protect you. We failed.” She opens her mouth, and I place my finger against her lips.
“It might not be rational, but it’s how we feel.
We're proud men, so it stings that we weren’t the ones to rescue you.
It doesn’t mean we aren’t grateful Rylee was here, or that we think she isn’t capable of protecting you.
We care about her, and it was difficult seeing her so close to losing her life.
Our lives have been filled with regret, and we have to move past our guilt.
It isn’t something you need to worry about.
We’ll get over it. Preventing any pain from touching you isn’t rational either, yet we will try our best to stop it. ” I drop my hands.
“Not possible,” she whispers, smiling softly.
“Our egos are grand.” I wink, smirking. “It’s the thought that counts, right?”
“Yes.”
I nod. “Good,” I hum, my gaze traveling over her face.
“We’ll probably do things to piss you off.
Please remember we will do our best to make you as happy as possible.
I want to give you the gift of the jaguar.
You will be powerful. Human bodies are weak and can carry disease.
It will give me great relief to know it will be hard to hurt you.
The freedom of shifting is like nothing else in the world.
I want to see your reaction to the world through your animal's eyes. The magic of running through the woods as an animal is indescribable. Everything else falls away.” I cup her knee.
“I will love you until our souls leave this world and travel to the next.” I squeeze my fingers.
“Damn,” she breathes, shaking her head lightly.
“As you walked toward me in the hallway, your eyes intensely fixed on me, I thought, ‘I could get lost with this man and be forever happy.’ You watch me in a way that makes me feel like the center of your universe. I’ve never had anyone pay such attention to every need.
You know what I’m thinking before I voice it.
The way you move is as if you're stalking prey, yet I don’t want to run away, but into your arms. You are pure class, but deadly in a crisp suit.
It’s a wicked combination and sexy as fuck.
” She grins. “Our time with Lawson was the most erotic of my life. It felt like my life was finally showing me where I was supposed to be. I don’t know if I will be good at being a shifter, but I want to find out.
The way you describe it is intoxicating, just as you are.
” She turns her hand and grips mine. “I am astonished by the man you have become despite the woman who raised you. I can’t imagine what kind of resolve it took to keep your control and leave when you could.
Many times, I wanted to give in to my father’s wishes.
Something held me strong. Maybe it was Rylee or the need for something better once I made it out.
I’m glad I did. I want to be the one you love forever, and someone you can be proud to be mated to.
We aren’t perfect, but we have the foundation for a wonderful, magical life together.
There is no room for guilt or regret between us.
I thought I felt love before. It was nothing like this.
” She tilts her head, her eyes wet. “This is all-consuming. You make me feel butterflies when you look at me or touch me.” She looks down at our joined hands.
“Your hands are strong and could cause such pain, yet I know they will hold me tenderly.” She meets my gaze.
“I love you, too. I want to mate with you. I promise to treat your heart with care, and show you just as much love as you do me.”
I release her hand, grab the side of her neck, and yank her forward.
As I take her mouth, I let her words sink into my soul.
She has brought light and laughter into our world.
I will never take it for granted. She lets me control our kiss, knowing I need it, yet she doesn’t do it just to please me, but to please each other.
It’s not gentle or slow. I tighten my hand on her neck and force her to tip her head back further.
I pull her deeper against my chest, banding my arm around her waist, and growl as she whimpers in need.
A throat clears, and I want to snarl at Hunter.
“The crew is leaving,” he says. “Rylee is ready to go, and she would like to say goodbye.”
“Right…yes,” Haven rasps, and licks her lips.
“I need a minute,” I grit out, as she stands.
“Oh—” She glances down, and rolls her lips.
“I’ll be in soon.”
She nods and walks away. I watch her slide her palm across Hunter’s chest as she passes him, and I enjoy the longing I see in his expression.
“Are you going to tell her?” I ask him when she disappears into the house.
“What?” he asks, turning to face me.
“That you love her.” I tilt my head.
“Yes. I have no reservations about revealing my feelings,” he says softly.
“Good, because she’s ready to complete the bond,” I say, standing.
“I know.” He grins. “Lawson came in happy as shit.”
“They had a good conversation.” I’m thrilled for him. “He’s been through enough.”
“Haven’t we all?” He walks to the entrance of the gazebo. “Vivian was a horrible example to you. She tormented you in subtle ways.”
“That is a good way to describe her,” I mumble.
“Have you moved past it completely?” he asks.
“For the most part.” I look toward the trees. “I think I’ll always have moments. Once in a while, I have dreams about her dinner parties, her wicked slap, and the basement. She’s a small woman, but her palm stung horribly.”
“I don’t like thinking about it,” he whispers, and I focus on him.
“What?” I frown.
“Imagining you living with her is painful. I wished I could have rescued you,” he says.
“Like you wished you could rescue Lawson? Haven? Bane?” I lean against the rail, facing him.
“You are not the sole person responsible for all the bad shit that happened to us. I felt guilt for not being there for any of you when you needed it, but I couldn’t have been.
You take on everyone’s trauma. Don’t you have enough of your own? ”
“I do,” he mumbles, bowing his head. “I felt powerless.” He meets my eyes. “So, now I do everything I can to never feel that way again. I try to stay in control at all times.”
“Love is all about losing control,” I hum.
“Yes, but for some reason,” he shakes his head, “it’s easy with her.”
“Because it’s meant to be.” I smile slightly. “You can need her, and us. It doesn’t make you weak.”
“I know. I do. I need you, too.” He rubs his jaw.
“It doesn’t make sense, but I was angry at you and Lawson.
You left me. I realize we didn’t have control over the adults' actions, yet it stung. I wanted you to fight harder to stay with me. We couldn’t, though.
I’ve never felt so insignificant as I did when they took you away.
I felt a rage a child should never feel.
I think that rage has pushed me every year since, until we found you. ”
“It’s time to let it go.” I move forward, stopping in front of him. “We made it. All the shit we went through made us the men who can love Haven as if every day is our last. She deserves our love, and to give her the family none of us ever had.”
“I know. I will,” he says gruffly. “I’ll work on it.”
I smile. “You can do anything, Big Brother.” I cup his shoulder, leaning close. “I love you.”
“I love you,” he says, pounding his fist on my back. “What matters is now.”
“Yeah.” We separate, and I roll my shoulders. “All the cars are leaving. Are you ready to claim our mate?”
“Very,” he rumbles.
“Do you want us to give you time with her, alone?” I ask.
“I’m not afraid to speak in front of you,” he says, rolling his eyes.
“That’s right,” I chuckle, as he steps on the path. “Big Brother isn’t afraid of anything.” I push his shoulder as I pass him. He growls, and I jog to the door.
“Remy,” he says, amusement in his voice he can’t hide.
I’m still smiling as I walk down the hallway and come to a stop in the kitchen.
Haven is doing the dishes, and Lawson is wiping the counter.
The scent in the room is strong with chemicals.
Bane is leaning against the counter, his attention on Haven.
He looks at Hunter when he enters behind me, and they share a nod.
Hunter moves to the front door and enters the code, making sure the house is secure.
At first, when they found me, I was jealous of the way they spoke without needing words.
Knowing what they went through together, it’s not surprising, and it doesn’t mean they love me or Lawson any less.
Haven laughs at something Law said, and doesn’t see Bane coming. She squeals as he lifts her and throws her over his shoulder.
“Bane,” she gasps.
“Time, huh?” Law asks, grinning.
“Guys,” Haven laughs, pushing against Bane’s back.
“Go with it, Princess,” Hunter says, moving toward her. We follow Bane as he carries her up the stairs.
“Time?” she asks, looking at us through the curtain of her hair.
“Yeah,” Hunter rumbles, and an awareness moves over her features.
“Okay,” she mumbles.
Bane reaches the top of the stairs and doesn’t stop until he’s in her bedroom.
He eases her from his shoulder and places her on the edge of the bed.
She brushes her hair away, her eyes locked on his face.
His chest rises, and he clenches his hands.
I move to the headboard and lean against the canopy.
This is the time for Bane and Hunter. I want them to be her focus.
Lawson moves to the left, opposite me, and leans against the wall.
“Do you want to be with us?” Bane rumbles.
“Yes,” she says softly.
“Are you ready to be our mate?” he continues.
“I am.”
“The change won’t be pleasant,” he says, and I resist rolling my eyes.
“I know,” she says.
“We will never leave you during the transition. Let it work through you, don’t resist. You are meant to be ours so that it will be fine in the end.”
“I trust you.”
“You know I don’t like talking about my feelings,” he says, releasing his clenched fingers. “I love you.”
I smile. My brother is blunt to his core.