Chapter 11
CHAPTER 11
Nikita
T he morning light filtered through the heavy curtains of the bedroom, casting long shadows across the room. But the sunlight did nothing to pierce the darkness brewing inside me. I stood by the window, watching the trees sway in the wind outside the estate, but my mind was far from peaceful. Every passing minute fed the fire in my chest, the fury that had been building since last night.
I clenched my jaw, the memories of our night together playing over and over in my head. The way she had submitted, the way her body had reacted to me—it should have been enough to satisfy the storm inside me. But it wasn't. If anything, it had only made things worse. The need for answers burned even hotter now, a relentless ache that wouldn't go away.
I had given her a chance, a chance to come clean. But she hadn't taken it. She had continued to play her part, continued to lie to me, even as I claimed her. The woman who slept next to me had deceived me, and the knowledge of it twisted inside me like a knife.
I couldn't wait any longer.
The door behind me creaked open, and I heard the soft sound of Lily's footsteps as she entered the room. I didn't turn to face her immediately, didn't acknowledge her presence. Instead, I kept my gaze fixed on the window, my hands clenched into fists at my sides. I was ready to snap at the slightest provocation.
"Nikita?" Her voice was soft, cautious, like she knew she shouldn't be poking around me. "Wouldn't you like anything to eat?"
I took a deep breath, forcing myself to keep my voice steady. "Sit down, Lily."
There was a moment of hesitation before I heard the soft rustle of her clothing as she sat on the edge of the bed. I could feel her eyes on me, watching, waiting for an explanation, but I wasn't ready to give it to her. I needed to see her squirm first. I needed to watch her try to lie to me again.
I turned slowly, my gaze locking onto hers. She looked up at me, her eyes wide, searching my face for some clue as to what was going through my mind. I could see the dread there, the worry. Good. She should be worried.
"We need to talk," I said, my voice cold, controlled.
She swallowed, her hands clasped tightly in her lap. "About what?"
"About you," I replied, stepping closer to the bed. "About your past."
I watched her carefully, noting the way her body tensed ever so slightly at my words. She was good—very good at hiding her reactions—but not good enough. Not with me. I had trained myself to see through lies, to pick apart every subtle movement, every flicker of emotion. And right now, I could see the fear starting to creep into her eyes.
"My past?" she echoed, her voice steady but tight.
"Yes," I said, my gaze never leaving hers. "Tell me about your husband."
I could see the shock flash across her face. She hadn't expected that question. She thought she had hidden it well, that I didn't know. But I did. I knew everything.
"What do you want to know?" she asked, her voice a little too calm.
I stepped closer, my presence looming over her as I stared down at her, watching every tiny movement. "Tell me the truth, Lily. I want to know everything."
She hesitated, her eyes flickering away from mine for just a second, and that was all the confirmation I needed. She was lying to me again, even now, after everything we had been through.
"I've already told you about him," she said quietly, her gaze returning to mine. "He… he died. There's nothing more to say."
I clenched my fists at my sides, the anger boiling just beneath the surface. "I want the truth," I growled, stepping closer until I was standing directly in front of her, towering over her. "Not the version you've been feeding me."
Her breath hitched, and I saw the panic flicker in her eyes. She was trapped, and she knew it. But she still wasn't ready to give in.
"I don't understand," she whispered, her voice trembling slightly. "What are you asking me?"
I leaned down, my face inches from hers, my voice low and deadly. "I'm asking you why you've been lying to me since the day you walked into my life."
Her eyes widened, her breath catching in her throat as the words hit her. She knew. She knew what I was asking, but she was still trying to figure out how much I knew. Still trying to decide how far she could take this lie before I tore it apart.
"I haven't lied to you," she whispered, but the tremble in her voice betrayed her.
"Stop," I snapped, my voice sharp and unforgiving. "I know everything, Lily. I know who your husband was."
Her entire body tensed, and I could see the fear flooding her eyes now, the panic she could no longer hide. I straightened, my hands clenched at my sides as I watched her, waiting for her to say something. Anything. But she was silent.
"You think I wouldn't find out?" I continued, my voice a dangerous growl. "You thought you could come into my life, play this role, and I wouldn't figure out who you really are?"
She shook her head, her hands trembling in her lap. "Nikita, I?—"
"Enough," I interrupted, my voice hard. "No more lies."
The silence stretched between us. I could see her trying to find the right words, trying to figure out how to salvage this. But it was too late. I had already seen through her. I had already uncovered the truth.
"I know who your husband was," I said again, my voice cold. "Alexei Morozov. The man who betrayed my family. The man I had executed."
Her breath came in shallow, uneven gasps, and I could see the panic rising in her eyes. This was it—the moment her lies had finally caught up with her. I watched her, every movement, every twitch of her hands, as she tried to gather herself. She wasn't going to get away with it. Not this time.
"Nikita…" she whispered, her voice fragile, broken.
I stepped even closer, looming over her as I let the silence stretch out. I wanted her to feel it—the weight of the truth crashing down on her. I wanted her to know exactly what she had done.
"You thought I wouldn't find out?" I repeated, my voice a low growl. "You thought I wouldn't learn the truth?"
Her lips parted, but no words came. She didn't have a defense. There was nothing she could say that would make this better. She had been lying to me from the start. Everything between us—the trust, the intimacy—had been built on her deception.
"I—" she started, but her voice cracked, and she closed her eyes, the shame written across her face.
"Tell me why," I demanded, my voice rough, biting. "Tell me why you're really here."
Her eyes snapped open, meeting mine with a flash of desperation. "I… I didn't know how to tell you," she whispered, her voice barely audible. "At first, I thought I could… I thought I could just walk away, but then?—"
"Walk away?" I spat, cutting her off. "You thought you could walk into my life, use me, and then walk away like nothing ever happened?"
Her body tensed, and I saw the guilt flash in her eyes. She couldn't lie to me anymore, not when I was spitting out the truth. But she still wasn't giving me the one thing I needed—the one thing that would make any of this make sense.
"I need answers, Lily," I growled, my hands itching to grab her, to shake the truth out of her. "Why are you here? Why did you do this?"
She flinched at the harshness of my voice, her shoulders trembling as she stared down at her hands, avoiding my gaze. The seconds ticked by, and my patience was wearing thin. I was done waiting. Done giving her the benefit of the doubt.
"I wanted to get revenge," she finally said, her voice shaking.
I didn't move, my body rigid as her words sank in.
"Revenge?" I repeated, incredulous. "Your husband betrayed me, betrayed my family. And I had him killed."
Her face paled, and I could see her struggling to keep her composure. She was teetering on the edge, and I was right there, ready to push her over.
"But I didn't know why," she whispered, her voice barely audible. "No one told me what happened."
Her words hung in the air, and I stared down at her, the fury simmering inside me. "Why?" I growled. "Why? He sold me out, Lily. He betrayed my family. He deserved to die."
Her eyes snapped up to mine, filled with a mix of fear and her own anger, her own hurt. "And what about me?" she asked, her voice trembling. "What do I deserve?"
I leaned down, my face inches from hers, the anger boiling. "You tell me, Lily," I growled, my voice low and menacing. "What do you deserve for lying to me? For deceiving me?"
Tears welled in her eyes, but I didn't care. I wanted her to feel the weight of her betrayal, to know that she had crossed a line that could never be undone.
"I didn't know what to do," she whispered, her voice shaking. "I didn't know how to stop…"
"Stop?" I spat, my voice harsh. "You could have stopped at any time. You could have told me the truth. But instead, you kept lying, kept playing this fucking game."
She shook her head, her tears spilling over, running down her cheeks. "It wasn't a game," she whispered, her voice breaking. "I didn't mean for it to go this far."
I straightened, taking a step back as I looked down at her. "And what were you going to do?" I asked coldly. "How were you going to get revenge?"
She didn't answer right away, her eyes flicking away from mine as she struggled to find the words. But I could see it in her face, in the way her lips trembled and her body shook. She had fallen into her own trap, and now there was no escape.
"I thought… I thought I could poison you," she finally admitted.
I froze, my entire body going rigid as her words sank in.
Poison.
The truth was out now, hanging in the air between us like a dark cloud. She had come into my life for only one reason—to destroy me. To take revenge for what I had done to her husband. And I had been too blind to see it.
My fists clenched at my sides, the rage bubbling up inside me, threatening to explode. I had let her in. I had trusted her. And all the while, she had been plotting against me.
My vision blurred with fury as the reality of her words hit me like a wrecking ball. Every moment, every touch, every whispered lie—she'd been planning to destroy me from the start. And I'd let her.
"Poison," I repeated, my voice dangerously low. The word dripped from my lips like venom, laced with disgust. "That's how you were going to do it?"
She nodded, her eyes wide with fear. Her body trembled, the tears now falling freely down her face, but she didn't speak. She couldn't. There was nothing she could say that would justify what she had tried to do.
"Well?" I demanded, my voice sharp and cold. "Why didn't you do it?"
She flinched at the harshness of my tone, her lips parting, but it took her a moment to find her voice. "I wanted to poison you for killing Alexei," she whispered, her voice shaking. "But when I found out things weren't as simple as I had thought, that he had betrayed you… and after we…" She trailed off, and for a moment, the silence was deafening.
"After we what?" I growled, already doubting the words she couldn't force out.
Lily didn't answer, but the guilt was written all over her face. She looked like a cornered animal, her body tense, her breath coming in shallow gasps. She had no idea what to do, no idea how to make this right. But there was no making this right.
I wanted to punish her. I wanted to make her feel every ounce of the pain I felt, to crush her under the weight of her own betrayal. But more than that, I wanted to know why. Why hadn't she followed through with her plan? Why was she still here, in my bed, in my life?
"Why didn't you leave, Lily?" I asked again, my voice quieter now, but no less dangerous. "Why didn't you finish what you started?"
She swallowed hard, her gaze dropping to the floor. "I couldn't. I couldn't go through with it."
"Why?" I barked, the demand like a whip crack in the quiet room.
Her eyes shot up to meet mine, and for the first time, I saw something in her that wasn't fear. It was something else. Something raw, soft. A plea.
"Because I—" She stopped herself, the words caught in her throat, but I wasn't about to let her back down now.
"Because what?" I pressed, taking a step closer. "Because you realized I'm not the monster you thought I was? Or because you got in too deep? Tell me, Lily."
She bit her lip, her gaze flicking away again, her entire body tense with the weight of the confession she was about to make. I could feel the tension radiating off her, the guilt and the shame twisting her up inside, just as my anger twisted through me.
"I couldn't do it because I…" she began again, her voice trembling. Her eyes met mine, glassy with tears, and when she spoke, I could hardly hear her. "Because I fell in love with you."
The words hung in the air.
I froze.
For a long moment, I didn't move. I didn't breathe. Her confession hit me like a punch to the gut, knocking the wind from my lungs, leaving me standing there in stunned silence. She loved me. The woman who had come into my life to destroy me had fallen in love with me instead.
My chest tightened with an emotion I couldn't name, an emotion I didn't want to feel. I had been betrayed before. I had been lied to, played, used. But this? This was something else entirely.
Love.
The word felt foreign, like it didn't belong in my world, like it had no place between us. How could she love me after everything? How could I even believe her after everything she had done?
I stared down at her, my mind racing, my heart pounding in my chest as I tried to make sense of the chaos swirling inside me. The rage was still there, burning hot and uncontrollable, but now, there was something else. Something that made it impossible to act, impossible to lash out the way I wanted to.
I should have thrown her out of my life right then and there. I should have cast her aside like the traitor she was. But I didn't. I couldn't. The truth was, even after everything, I still wanted her.
And that scared the hell out of me.
"I don't know what you're playing at," I said, my voice low, dangerous. "But love? Love doesn't change what you've done."
Lily flinched at my words, the tears streaming down her face. She was shaking now, her whole body trembling as she struggled to keep herself together. But I wasn't going to make this easy for her. Not after what she had done.
"You came here to destroy me," I continued, my voice cold, biting. "And now you want me to believe that you've changed? That you love me?"
"I do," she whispered. "I didn't mean for it to happen, but it did. I fell in love with you, Nikita."
Her words stabbed at something deep inside me, something I hadn't even realized was there. But I couldn't let her see that. I couldn't let her know how much her betrayal had affected me.
"Do you think that changes anything?" I demanded, stepping closer until I was looming over her, my shadow swallowing her whole. "Do you think that makes up for all the lies? For everything you've done?"
She shook her head, her gaze dropping to the floor. "No," she whispered. "It doesn't. But it's the truth."
"The truth?" I spat, my anger flaring up again. "You don't know the first thing about the truth, Lily. You've been lying to me since the day we met."
She didn't argue. She didn't defend herself. She just sat there, broken, defeated, her body trembling as the weight of her actions crashed down on her.
The rage boiled over inside me, and before I could stop myself, I grabbed her by the arm, pulling her up from the bed. She gasped, her eyes wide with fear, but I didn't care. I couldn't care. All I could see was the betrayal, the lies.
"I should have killed you the moment I found out," I growled, my grip tightening on her arm. "You're lucky you're still standing."
She whimpered, but she didn't pull away. She didn't resist. She just stared up at me, her eyes filled with tears, with guilt, with regret. But not fear. Not anymore.
"And now?" she whispered, her voice barely audible. "What will you do now?"
I didn't answer right away. I didn't know what to say. The fury was still there, pulsing through me with every breath I took, but beneath it, something else twisted inside me. Something that made it impossible to act, to follow through with the punishment she deserved.
"I should end this," I growled, my grip still tight on her arm. "I should end you."
The words were harsh, cruel, but they were laced with a truth that neither of us could deny. I could kill her.
I should kill her, like I killed her husband.