CHAPTER FIFTY-SEVEN
Blair
With every passing hour, a little bit more of my fight dies. Realistically, I know we can’t do anything for Zane at one in the morning, but I can’t help thinking about him stuck in that cell while his parents are at home, most likely having a peaceful night’s sleep.
“His own fucking parents.”
No matter how many times I say that out loud, it never gets any more believable. I will never understand how anyone could do that to someone they were supposed to love.
The light peeking through the crack in the door of my childhood bedroom dims just after two a.m., telling me my parents have finally gone to bed.
But even after being bathed in darkness, my eyes still won’t close.
If they’d just let me see Zane yesterday, I would have felt better right now. The unknown is killing me. Though not as much as it’s likely to be killing him.
He doesn’t deserve this. Not now, with everything else that’s going on. Not ever.
I don’t think I’ve met someone more misunderstood in my life, and it’s going to be the end of him. There’s only so much more he can handle. If he hasn’t already reached his limit.
My phone vibrates across the counter of my light green nightstand, and I rush to grab it, my heart erratic in my chest despite knowing it isn’t going to be him.
Hayley’s name lights up my screen, and I don’t know why, but it momentarily calms me.
HAYLEY: We’ve landed safely
HAYLEY: Shit, I just remembered the time difference. I hope this didn’t wake you
HAYLEY: I’ll call you in the morning
BLAIR: I’m awake. I can’t see myself sleeping at all tonight. Thank you for coming so quickly. It means a lot to both of us
HAYLEY: Of course. Want to meet us at our hotel? I’m happy to pull an all-nighter
A small smile tugs at my lips. I really hope this is the start of a lifelong friendship, because I already love Hayley. Which is why I’m not going to bring down her happiness.
BLAIR: Thank you for the offer, but I’m shit company at the moment
HAYLEY: I understand. We’re here if you change your mind. Otherwise, we’ll see you in the morning
BLAIR: Thank you
I’m beyond curious about who she’s referring to when she says “we” but I don’t ask. I’ll find out in the morning. Which would come faster if I could just fall asleep.
After trying a bunch of different strategies from singing to counting sheep and then imagining my body getting heavier, I’m up before the sun, dressed and ready to go before my parents—a rarity growing up.
Dad’s internal alarm has been set for dawn since he was a football star, and Mom learned to live on less sleep because Cade and I always woke her up.
If she gets a solid seven hours, her body won’t let her sleep any longer.
I can usually sleep until my alarm goes off. Except last night. I’m not sure I slept a wink.
The cardinals singing outside grab my attention, and I watch them splash around the pond in the yard, knowing that any second now, my dad will be walking down the stairs, his footsteps heavy as he undoubtedly whistles a tune in return.
It used to piss me off. Cade too. We hated being woken by the birds, with Dad singing along. But now, I’m waiting for it, waiting for the moment I’m no longer alone.
Only this time, he’s not so chirpy.
“Morning,” he grates from the hallway when he finds me in the dining room. “How’d you sleep?”
“I didn’t.”
Dad’s already sullen face drops. “You and me both, Princess. But today is going to be better. I can feel it.”
I try to smile, to share in his optimism, but I’m not feeling it, and he doesn’t deserve my lies. “I wish I felt the same.”
“How about you go for a walk and clear your head, enjoy some peace.”
As wonderful as that sounds… “I can’t. Zane needs me here and I’m not abandoning him again.”
“When did you abandon him?”
“When Sierra died. I told him to leave.”
“He didn’t have to listen. He wanted to go just as much.”
“You might be right, but I still should have been there for him. I’m going to be there now.”
“There’s not much you can do. At least not until the hearing.”
“I know.” I pull at the hem of my top and let out a breath. “I’ll feel more at peace knowing I’m close. Can we go back to Lucky’s Diner?”
Dad smiles. “We can. Jackie said we can use their private dining room for as long as we need.”
“Thank you. A few of Zane’s friends and teammates are here, so I’ll let them know to meet us there.”
“Sounds good. It’s nice to know he has a good network supporting him. Cade’s arriving soon too.”
“Ugh. Cade’s been such a bitch about Zane and me. Can you send him back to LA?”
Dad chuckles. “He’s just looking out for his little sister. You have to remember; we all saw the pain you went through when he left. It was hard on us all, but Cade didn’t really handle it as well as he should have. It would break him to see you go through that again.”
“That’s not going to happen. I’ve come to realize that no matter how hard we fight it or, perhaps, how hard I fight it, Zane and I are meant to be. He’s scared, but he’s not going anywhere. I wouldn’t let him if he tried.”
“I believe that.” Dad smiles. “When Zane puts his mind to something, he never gives up. A blessing and a curse. And you…well, you were never meant to be with Nathan. I knew that. But I’d forgotten the energy that follows you when you’re truly happy.
And that energy brightens when Zane’s in your life. It always has.”
My breath hitches, but that shouldn’t come as a shock to me. He’s been my person for a long time. We just had to find our way back to each other. We both needed time apart to be stronger together.
And I’m going to make sure he knows that.
It’s after eight before Mom and Dad finally agree to go back to the diner, taking over their private dining room once more. I know we can’t see Zane, but being closer makes it easier to breathe.
When the early morning rush slows, Dad sneaks out to grab coffee, and I’m so stuck in my head, it takes me a few minutes to realize Mom’s quieter than usual.
“Are you okay?”
“Me?” Her eyes widen as she shakes her head. “I’m fine. It’s you and Zane I’m worried about.”
“I’m okay. But I’m not sure I can say the same about Zane.”
“It’s breaking my heart.” She clutches her chest, her voice soft. “The hardest truth to swallow is that Ron and Fiona could do this to him. You and Cade could do just about anything, and I’d still love and protect you with all my heart.”
“Even if you thought I’d killed him?”
“Even then.” Her response is quick, clear, and full of conviction, and I have to agree with her, because I’ve been thinking the same thing.
“I can’t believe I never saw it,” she continues, her tone harsh as though she’s scolding herself.
“I didn’t see it either.”
“Yes, but they were our closest friends. At least, I thought they were. You barely saw them after Sierra and Zane were gone.”
I swallow a lump in my throat, my chest tight with guilt. “There’s something I have to tell you.”
Mom’s gaze shoots to mine, and the love reflected back at me confirms she’s nothing like Zane’s parents and never will be.
Sucking my lips into my mouth, I fight back tears of regret. “I feel like such an idiot, Mom.”
Mom rushes forward, pulling me into my arms as she whispers reassuringly without even knowing what I’m about to say. “Whatever it is, we’ll get through it. Okay?”
I nod before finally telling her what’s been going on.
“I’ve actually been in touch with Ron and Fiona since Sierra died.
They’ve been keeping in contact, hoping I’ll help them feel better, I guess.
” My gaze drops to the floor, and I take a deep breath before glancing up and continuing on.
“It tore me apart every time we spoke, but I kept quiet about it because no one else knew Sierra like I did, except Zane. They told me he stopped speaking to them after he left. They never told me they blamed him. They lied. All this time they made me believe he was an asshole, and it was them.”
“Oh, Blair. Why didn’t you tell us? We could have helped. That’s a lot for you to take on. What did they expect you to do?”
“I think they expected me to heal them. Actually, I know that now because they were more desperate during the last few calls, and when I mentioned Zane, they got angry, making me feel like it was my fault. It took me until yesterday to realize they’d been emotionally abusing me. They—”
“They what?” Dad’s raised voice booms from behind me, and I spin around so fast I get dizzy.
“Dad, I thought—”
“Repeat what you just said. I want to make sure I understand correctly.”
I swallow a lump in my throat, the pain in his eyes too much to handle.
But still, I do as he asked. “I think they were emotionally abusing me. But I’m not sure they realized it.
They wanted me to talk through what happened over and over, to tell them stories about Sierra, to keep her spirit alive.
But they made me feel guilty if I couldn’t. As though I was adding to their pain.”
Dad’s still when I glance up at him, his hands balled into fists by his sides. “How often did they call?”
“In the early days, I met them for lunch often, but when I went away to college, they called weekly. They—”
“Weekly?” Dad’s nostrils flare as he steps forward, shaking his head. “I understand their need to heal, but you were a kid. It wasn’t your responsibility to heal them.”
“I was almost an adult, Dad, and—”
“No, Blair. How the hell were you supposed to move forward, if they kept dragging you back? No one person should be someone else’s life raft.
Especially not someone who’s sinking as deeply as they are.
Jesus Christ.” Dad groans, and if I wasn’t already broken from seeing Zane’s hopeless expression as the police dragged him away, my dad’s anguish would probably shatter me.
“You were a mess, Blair. For years. And they…” His voice cracks, and he trails off.
“I should have known; I should have done something.”
“No.” I jump up from my chair, sending it skidding across the vinyl floor before running toward Dad, my heart pounding.
“I never told you because I thought I was handling it, and in the beginning, I thought it would help me too. It’s only recently that I let myself stop and think about the toll their calls were taking on me.
More so when I realized what they’d done to Zane. He’s got no one, Dad. And now this.”
“He’s got us.”
“What if that’s not enough?” I sniff back fresh tears, and Dad stiffens, lifting my face so he can look in my eyes.
“It’s more than enough. I’m going to fix this.” His gaze burns with determination as he stands tall, his knuckles white from clenching.
“What?”
“I’ve got to go.”
“Dad?”
He presses a kiss to my head and turns to walk away, stopping when he comes face to face with Reed Coombs. Hayley and Keeley walk in behind him, followed by an older guy I don’t know but who I’m guessing is their team owner, Salvatore D’Angelo.
“Hi.” Reed smiles and waves before he shakes his head. “Sorry, that was a little too cheery for the situation.”
Hayley snorts and I have to admit, my lips pull into a grin.
“We’ll welcome any cheer we can get.” Mom steps forward. “I’m Florence, this is my husband, Tim, and I think you know Blair.” She waves in my direction and Hayley bounces in anticipation.
“We do. At least Keeley and I do. Hi, Blair.”
Our new arrivals introduce themselves, and my mom smiles warmly.
“Thanks for coming,” Dad finally says, his mind clearly on wherever he was going. “I’ll let Blair and Florence fill you in on what we know. I have somewhere to be.”
“Wait.” I grab Dad’s hand, pulling him to a halt. “What’s going on?”
“I think I know how I can help Zane.”
“How?”
“I’ll tell you everything when I get back.” He squeezes my hand before releasing it, then beelines for the door. “Excuse me for rushing off.”
“I’m coming with you.” Reed stops him, his expression serious. “I’m here to help.”
“Not a chance, Coombs.” Mr. D’Angelo steps forward, his stare offering no room for negotiation. “You’re staying out of this. You’re here for support and to provide your statement to the police on another matter. You’re not getting involved.”
“I’ll be back soon,” Dad says, but only manages a step before D’Angelo taps his shoulder.
“Can I help?” He stands tall, putting his hands in the pockets of his expensive suit, his presence filling the space. He looks like the kind of guy that means business, and I want to say yes on Dad’s behalf. But Dad’s not so quick to jump.
He eyes Salvatore, his gaze thoughtful, before he offers a subtle nod. “Come on. You can be my witness.”
My stomach drops. Witness? What the hell is he going to do? I turn to Mom for support but she shakes her head. “Let them go. He needs to help and he knows what he’s doing.”
“Do you know what he’s doing?”
“No. But I trust him. And you should too.”
“Okay. But I’m going to need a distraction.”
“Oooh.” Hayley throws her hand in the air. “I’m good at those.”
Reed chuckles and even my mom laughs.
“Thanks, Hayley. What have you got?”
Hayley’s suggestion for us to write character statements on Zane’s behalf was great in theory, but when it came to writing it, I felt sick. If Zane’s still being charged after Dad’s and my statements, there’s no way they’re going to care about how great we think he is.
The time ticks by, way too slowly for my liking, and I’m too anxious to sit still.
It’s been well over an hour, and Dad’s still missing in action, doing whatever it is he needs a witness for. Cutting it close to when Zane needs us most.
“He’s going to miss the hearing, Mom,” I complain, picking up my pacing from where I left off yesterday.
“He’s not,” Keeley answers before Mom can. “Sal’s been texting me. They’re on their way back.”
“From where exactly?”
Keeley smiles sympathetically, her shoulder lifting in a half shrug. “He didn’t say.”
“God. What’s with the secrecy?”
“He didn’t want you involved if anything went wrong,” Mom answers this time, and when my gaze snaps her way, I find her phone locked tightly in her grasp.
“Has Dad been texting you?”
“Only once.”
“So…” I raise my eyebrows, gesturing for her to fill me in.
“So?”
“Where was he?” For fuck’s sake, does no one understand how stressful this is? In less than an hour, Zane might be ordered to face charges. “Please, Mom.”
Noise filters in from the adjoining diner as the door opens to our private dining room and my pulse spikes. Thank God. I turn to ensure that it’s Dad, but before I see him, Mom’s frantic gasp fills the air.
“Tim!” she scolds as I suck in a breath. “What did you do?”