Chapter 20
LOIS
I spend the rest of the night trying to get close to Nick every chance I get.
When Callie drags me off the dance floor at just after midnight, both of us a little — or a lot — past tipsy, I spot Nick leaning against the bar waiting to be served.
He’s made sure to buy every one of my drinks tonight, handing them to me with a sneaky caress of my hand each time.
At least we have no worries when it comes to Sean tonight, he’s so far gone he may as well be on another planet right now.
I assume Nick is getting me another drink as he’s been monitoring my glass like a security guard for the city bank since he got here.
But when I glance up from the table, the one I’ve been picking the wood off with my half broken nail for five minutes, I see him talking to someone.
He’s talking to a girl, one with legs like skyscrapers and a thick head of blonde locks that cascade down past her waist.
She’s close to him, too close if you ask me and I see them laughing together about something.
My stomach lurches and the instinct to smash through their conversation like a wrecking ball is instantly eating me alive.
But I stay put, I won’t let jealously rule me.
I trust Nick, I really mean that and I won’t act like the crazy girlfriend who expects her man to never look in another woman’s direction ever again.
She strokes a sharp nailed finger down his arm and laughs again, before they embrace and I almost pass out on the damp, sticky floor of this sweaty club.
I look back down at the wooden table that my elbows are leaning on and continue my nervous picking of the splinters, trying to do anything but let that hug replay in my head.
“Here baby,”
Nick’s voice makes me jump, almost knocking the margarita straight out of his hand and all over my lap.
“What’s wrong?”
His eyes are concerned, etched with worry and confusion at my skittish nature.
I shuffle across to let him sit down in the booth beside me.
“Nothing, I'm fine.”
I lie, pausing to decide whether I should keep this raging green monster locked in my chest or whether I should be mature and simply ask Nick about it.
Would he lie to me about who she was? I trust him fully…I think.
I mean he’s never given me any reason not to and that’s how I always treat people in my life.
I trust everyone unless they show me that I shouldn’t and Nick has been nothing but honest and open with me from the very beginning.
I take a deep breath and pull up my big girl pants.
“Who was that girl you were just talking to at the bar?”
Nick eyes me over the rim of his glass.
“Oh, Harriet? She’s my ex.”
My stomach somersaults again and this time I struggle to push the words out from where they’ve lodged themselves in the back of my throat.
“Ok…what were you talking about? I saw you hug her.”
I squeak, suddenly a bubble of tears have formed and I'm not quite sure why.
I have no reason to cry yet.
Not until Nick says that he’s decided he actually still loves her and wants to try again, leaving me alone with my heart in a million pieces.
He wouldn’t say that though, would he?
He looks at me through brown eyes, lighter than usual.
“She just asked how I was and if I was seeing anyone.”
“And, did you tell her you were?”
I swallow hard, my throat razor sharp.
“Of course I did.”
Nick’s expression twists into confusion.
“Why would I lie about you? I don’t want to keep this a secret, I want to scream it from the fucking rooftops, but I know I can’t right now.”
His hand flattens against my lower back and he scoots me closer to him.
“Harriet was happy for me, she said she hopes everything works out for us.”
“Ok,”
I say quietly, keeping my eyes down in my lap.
“I don’t mind you talking to her, I just wanted to check that you don’t want to get back together with her.”
I glance up for a beat, locking eyes with him.
“Because if you do I would understand, I—”
Nick shakes his head with a smile and cuts off my rambling.
He presses his mouth to mine without even checking who’s watching, taking the back of my neck in his hand and sealing our lips together.
I catch the breath in my throat and sink into the kiss, forgetting for a moment that we’re in public and that our entire group of friends could be watching.
But right now I find myself not caring, I let Nick kiss me like I'm the only girl in the entire world.
When our lips part he holds my gaze with his and like a magnet I can’t look away.
“It’s bothering you and I'm sorry, I would never have spoken to her if I’d have known it would upset you.”
I shrug once, the people pleaser in me choosing my next words.
“It’s not bothering me.”
Nick smiles softly.
“You’ve brought it up, so it’s bothering you.”
“Well, ok, yeah maybe a little bit.”
I sigh heavily and feel instant guilt weighing on my shoulders. I wish it didn’t bother me to see another woman touching Nick like that, but it does and I know it’s because I love him.
“I know you two have history and feelings are complicated. So if you still have feelings for her, I get it.”
Nick barks a laugh and scrapes a hand through my hair, tucking it behind one ear.
“Lo, I don’t want her or anyone else for that matter. I chose you, I had other options, but I never needed to even consider them because I love you . It’s been you since the moment we kissed in the kitchen that night.”
My legs are jelly, tingling and numb from his words. The most perfect words just fall off his lips so effortlessly as always. And when he grins at me with that megawatt smile, I feel my heart galloping at 100 miles per hour.
Sometimes I can’t believe this is my reality. I spent so long crushing on Nick from a distance whilst he walked past me like I was a ghost and now I'm all he wants in life.
I meet his soft gaze, the one that holds everything I care about.
I peak over my shoulder towards the bar and the dance floor, our friends spread around the club with drinks in hands, none the wiser to Nick and I’s close proximity over here.
“It's like I was always there in the background while you fucked other girls and pretended I didn’t exist.”
I half whisper, sort of hoping he doesn’t hear me, even though this is something I’ve wanted to say to him for a while.
I have to get these feelings off my chest, the rejection I felt from him for so long before he finally noticed me.
His face softens with guilt and a hand lands on my bare thigh, squeezing comfortingly.
“It wasn’t like that Lo, I—”
“I know,”
I interrupt with a finger on his lips, one that he kisses gently.
“You didn’t know I had a crush on you.”
“No, I didn’t. But to be honest, even if I had known I never would have tried anything because of Sean.”
“I know, you’re scared of him.”
I roll my eyes and Nick scoffs loudly, straightening his back.
“I’m not scared of that stupid fucker, he should be scared of me.”
He runs a hand down his chest, puffing it out to maximum capacity.
I titter a laugh under my breath and smack a playful hand towards him, which he catches and grips tightly, dipping his face to mine.
His breath is warm against my lips when he speaks.
“I’m sorry I never noticed you. I guess I was looking for what I wanted everywhere but the exact place it was waiting for me.”
He pauses, taking my chin between his thick, tattooed fingers.
“You were right there all along and I'm a fucking idiot for not seeing you.”
“It doesn’t matter now,”
I drop a kiss to his lips and sit up straight.
“I’m sorry I even said that, I just needed to get it off my chest.”
“I get it, I bet it’s been eating you up since we started seeing each other.”
I shrug.
“A little, yeah.”
Nick’s eyes catch something over my shoulder and he shuffles away from me, nodding at somebody that I can’t see. I don’t turn around because I don’t need to, I can hear my brother’s deep, bellowing voice echoing behind me as he approaches.
“I think we should head off guys, Lewis just dropped three shot glasses and they smashed all over the floor. If we don’t leave now I think they’ll kick us out anyway.”
Sean glances over one shoulder, Callie tucked under his other arm.
Lewis appears from behind Sean and rolls his eyes dramatically.
“That’s all true, except the part where I smashed three shot glasses and ran away from the scene of the crime.”
He jabs a fist into my brother’s ribs.
“This dickhead was the one who trashed the place and now he’s shitting his pants that he’s going to get banned.”
A silent sigh of relief leaves my lungs and I stand up, nudging Nick out of my way.
“Good, I'm ready to go anyway, I need my bed.”
Molly and Kyle lead the way out of the club, which is now just about starting to die down.
The music has mellowed and the last few drunken stragglers begin to stagger towards the exit with us.
Nick is at the back of the group, just behind me.
He stays close, very close in fact and I feel his fingers gently dancing along my bare lower back.
They trail down lower and he takes a fistful of my ass in one hand, squeezing once and making me jump forwards.
When I throw him a loaded glare, he simply smiles like a kid on Christmas morning.
Fuck, I wish I didn’t love him sometimes.
The eight of us can’t fit into one taxi, thank god because I can’t stand to be within a mile of my brother any longer.
When Callie shoves him into the first taxi that comes along he’s singing loudly, whipping his arms through the air and telling all of us how much he loves us.
He’s making me feel queasy when he looks at me that way and even though I know he’s drunk as shit, him saying he loves me still stabs me through the chest.
If only he knew how I was betraying him right now.
His best friend’s hand is currently situated north up the back of my dress, twisting the string of my thong between his fingers.
Molly, Kyle, Nick and I climb into the next taxi only a moment later and finally I can snuggle up to Nick without the worry of who will see us.
Kyle and Molly spend the entire journey playing tonsil hockey, not bothering to glance our way even once.
Nick drops his face down to mine and smiles.
“Wanna play?”
“Fuck yes,”
I laugh and his mouth seals itself against mine, softly at first but soon he’s devouring me completely like no amount is enough for him.
His hands are tight around my waist, his lips moving methodically against mine, nibbling my bottom lip with his teeth and making me shiver.
My thighs are slippery to say the least, so when the taxi finally pulls up outside my dorm I practically yank Nick out with me.
I assume Molly and Kyle aren’t far behind, but I don’t bother to check if they’re following us as we pace up the stairs.
My pussy is throbbing with need for him and when we get into my bedroom and his hand comes around my throat there’s a mess in my underwear that needs attending to asap.
I spin around, falling back against the mattress with a sigh and dragging him on top of me by the hem of his t-shirt.
The same t-shirt that’s in a pile on my bedroom floor two-seconds later.
Nick’s bare chest is warm and moulds to me like plasticine, even though it’s as solid as a concrete path.
He kisses a trail down from my lips, across the column of my throat and down my collar bone, making me shudder with desire.
My legs squirm beneath his weight, desperate for friction and some sort of relief from the aching throb that's taken residence between my thighs.
Nick continues to move down my body, taking the string of my underwear between his teeth.
He’s looking up at me with hooded eyes and a desperate expression, one that likely matches mine.
He pulls them down my legs and his breath catches in his throat when his vision is pulled between my now open legs.
“Jesus Christ baby, you been hiding this from me all night?”
My laugh is more like a croak as I watch him.
“You going to get on with it or what?”
His heavy, hooded gaze catches mine and I can’t breathe when he grins like that, dipping his face and swiping a soft, slow tongue up my beating pussy.
I shudder and Nick’s huge fingers sink into my thighs, trapping me there.
He sucks my clit into his mouth, swirling the bud and creating a tingling, heavy sensation in the base of my spine.
Before I can spill my pleasure all over his tongue he sits up, whipping his underwear off and exposing the already thick, solid weapon that lives in his pants.
I swallow thickly when I watch him move towards me with the slow, purposeful movements of a lion.
He crawls up my body, peppering gentle kisses up my throat towards my lips and when they finally connect he pushes inside me.
His length stretches me, making me wriggle beneath him as I adjust to his size.
He takes a minute to pause, checking that I'm ok with a whisper in my ear and then he completely fucking destroys me in the best way possible.
He pounds into me, sucking purple swells up the edge of my jaw and into my hairline, behind my ear, everywhere his lips can find he marks me as his.
I can tell when he’s close because his shoulder tense hard under my wandering fingers.
They trace each line of the tattoos that live there, sometimes clawing at his skin when he hits the sweet spot inside me.
He yanks himself out of me so quickly I feel a burning emptiness and I wonder what the hell he’s doing, until he gestures to my bedroom floor.