Chapter 8
Caden
I walk past Finn and River as they hug by the station’s entrance.
Outside, the streetlights cast a bluish glow, enough to see a dozen or so dead Raiders lying on the ground.
Scared people watch through windows, not yet ready to celebrate their freedom.
I walk toward the open gate until I hear a horse getting closer.
It passes through, and I let out a long breath of relief when I recognize the rider.
Josh halts his horse a few feet from me and elegantly climbs down, adjusting his sniper rifle behind his back.
His clothes are plain and fit for the road, and his dark hair is slightly longer than the last time I saw him.
No matter how handsome he is as a young man, in my head he’ll always remain the same skinny kid who asked me and Ruben if he could play ball with us.
I pull him into a strong hug and say, “It’s my job to save your ass.”
“I guess you were unemployed for a minute there.”
We break the hug, and I pull him in for another one. “This one’s from Dino.”
He holds me firmly. “Received.”
We turn around at the sound of approaching footsteps. “Is everybody okay?” Timothy calls.
“Nanny Spider!” River crouches with his arms open.
Timothy wraps him in a hug. “My brave boy!”
“You two showed up suspiciously fast,” I tell Josh.
“We came across refugees from this town yesterday. Finn mentioned you’d be coming through here, so we changed course.”
“I was close enough to feel that Nanny Spider was in danger,” River says. I wonder if his hair is even redder now, but I likely forgot how red it was. It still surprises me how such delicate features can coexist with someone so deadly.
“I can’t communicate with River like his people can, but we're able to sense each other to a degree,” Timothy says. “Finn, are you hurt?”
“I’m okay.”
I clear my throat as some of the townsfolk begin to leave their homes, watching us with suspicion.
“Trey, you guys spread out and look for more Raiders that might be hiding. High alert.”
“Roger that.”
I walk to face the gathering crowd. Even with the Raiders lying dead around us, they look terrified and traumatized. “You’re safe,” I say loudly, making sure they all can hear. “I’m sorry this happened to you, but I need some volunteers to help dump the trash into the river.”
Almost everyone raises their hands, even some of the children.
We drag the bodies to the river and let the current take them away.
Once the town is clear of Raiders—dead or alive—the residents take to the streets to celebrate.
We’re invited to eat at one of their restaurants, and they also offer us rooms at the nearby motel.
I sit around a table with Finn, Josh, River, and Timothy.
It should feel strange shifting from combat to dinner so quickly, but it’s the circle of life as I know it.
“Show Timothy the gift you brought him,” Josh says.
River opens his bag and takes out a small black cowboy hat with a chin strap. “This is for you, Nanny Spider.”
“It’s beautiful!”
“I took it from a monkey doll.”
“Oh, well. Thank you.”
“Did you get my letters?” River asks Finn.
“Yes. All twenty-three of them.”
River scowls. “That’s it? What happened to the rest?”
The rest?
“I told you he wouldn’t get all of them,” Josh says. “The roads are becoming more dangerous.” He bumps his knee with mine. “I’m sorry about your squad.”
I nod and leave it at that.
“Denver is the source,” Finn says in a low voice. “It’s the heart of everything they do. We need to get the king of High Hope to join us, and then we’ll have the troops we need to strike.”
“You’ve met that king before?” I ask River.
“A few times. Lyla works for him as an advisor.”
“Why does Dino think we have to get his support?” Josh asks. “We have all the other Free Cities on board.”
I smile into my drink. You can take the Hiver out of the Hive, but he will always say we when talking about his people.
“They’re the second largest Free City after Blue Moon, and they use jetpacks,” Timothy says. “It gives them an advantage in combat.”
I’ve heard about those things, yet I need to see with my own eyes if a man can fly and still be able to fight.
“Have you been back to your village recently?” Finn asks River.
“Yes. My garden is very demanding, especially the cauliflower. My people all like Josh now. They use their real voice with him.”
I catch something in Josh’s eyes I’m not sure I can decipher. Not wishing to put him on the spot, I lean forward and ask quietly, “Have you guys heard anything about lizard men?”
“We have,” Josh says. “You hear a lot of crazy stories out there, but the lizard men have been mentioned more often recently. You think that Hector is controlling them? Or maybe one of them is controlling him?”
I shake my head. “I can’t imagine anyone controlling him with how he acted, but who knows? None of us would’ve known an old AI was controlling the New-Humans just by looking at them.”
“Father didn’t control them,” River says. “He gave them purpose, and they followed him willingly since the day they were born.”
“Saying they were born is a bit of a stretch.”
River narrows his eyes. “Was I not born?”
Well, shit. This isn’t an argument I want to get into, especially since I don’t care if he was born, created, or hatched. “Didn’t mean anything by that.”
“Well, whatever those things are, someone has been trying to keep them a secret, or at least low-key,” Timothy says. “Word of such creatures should have spread much quicker.”
“That’s about to change,” I say. “Hector wouldn’t have shown them to me if he still wanted to keep them a secret.” He arranged an entire bloody showcase.
Timothy nods. “True. Something must have made him change his mind, or maybe that was his plan all along.”
I hate how clueless we are about any of this. It feels like we should know more before going out to war.
We try to talk about less heavy subjects while we eat, and once we finish, Finn says, “I’m really tired. Can we call it a night?”
I ask Josh, “Mind sharing a room?” I don’t know if I’m stepping out of line, but it feels strange not having alone time with him after all these months.
He asks River, “Do you mind?”
“No. I will stay with Finn and Nanny Spider.”
We exit the restaurant and find people still celebrating in the streets. I stop to speak with my team—I don’t yet feel comfortable thinking of them as my squad—and we divide shifts to guard the motel. We should be safe now, but we’ll all sleep better knowing one of us is keeping watch.
I go to take a shower while Josh stays outside to catch up with Trey.
They never served together, but we orphanage kids tend to stick together.
The shower is wonderful, the water hot enough to untangle my stiff muscles from all the riding.
When I hear Josh entering the room, I call, “Be out in a minute!”
He enters the bathroom. “Are you shy now?”
I see his silhouette through the shower curtain as he takes off his clothes, then he steps into the stall. “Shit, are you trying to melt me?”
I lower the temperature. “Still a pussy, I see. Turn around.” I rub soap over his upper back. “You’ve gotten bigger.”
“We spent a month helping build a wall around a small settlement to the east. It took a lot of work.”
I like that he’s doing some good out there, even after giving up on being a Defender, though maybe he still sees himself as one. Some things go beyond uniforms and ranks.
“Is it okay for us to shower together?” I ask.
“I’m not aware of any rule book I have to follow. If you can keep your cock away from my ass, I think we’re good.” He turns around to face me. “I’m sorry I didn’t keep in touch more.”
“I remember a time when it was me apologizing for that. It’s fine, Joshy. I got your letters. I even had some of them memorized.” I might think of him as Josh in my head, but whenever I speak with him, I can’t help but call him Joshy.
“You memorized them?”
I recite to him one of his latest letters, and his eyes widen in surprise. I didn’t even realize I was memorizing them, but after reading each one dozens of times, the words got stuck in my head like a pleasant tune.
“Don’t sweat it about keeping in touch,” I say. “I know you prefer to be on the move.”
He looks away. “I’m not sure what I prefer.”
“Oh?”
He shakes his head. “Never mind.”
I stop the water. “We’ll talk about it in bed.”
“There’s nothing to talk about.”
“I didn’t mean it as a question, Private.”
“Oh, you’re definitely not pulling rank on me.”
We get dressed before slipping into bed.
It’s a small room, but the bed is big enough, even if the mattress is too soft.
Without needing to speak, Josh turns with his back to me, assuming the familiar position we spent many nights sleeping in.
I slide closer and wrap my arm around his chest, loving the familiarity of him and appreciating this moment.
“How’s Dino?” he asks me.
“Working hard. Keeping things moving. Breaking into people’s houses.”
“Huh?”
“Never mind.”
“I speak with him whenever we find a good radio transceiver. I ask to speak with you too, but you’re always away from the Hive.”
“Not always.” But a lot. Maybe too much. I turn off the light, casting us in darkness. “How are you, Joshy? No bullshit.”
He stalls before answering. “I’m happy.”
“Can you try sounding less sad saying that?”
“I’m not sad.” He takes a deep breath. “I love seeing the world and helping people, but after all this time, maybe I’ve seen enough.”
“You mean you want to settle down?”
“I don’t know. Something more permanent than today, at least.”
“You don’t think that River will agree to that?”
“He will if I ask.”
“But only because you asked.”
“Yes, and he’ll probably want us to stay in his village.”
“Don’t you like it there?”
“Every once in a while, but whenever his people need to use their real voice with me, I feel like they’re doing me a favor. I will never be one of them.”