Chapter 16
SIXTEEN
The kitchen was bustling as Kasia, standing in the doorway, caught Marianne’s eye. “I know you’re getting ready for evening service, but I’d like a few minutes when you have a chance.” Her voice carried over the noise of the kitchen. When Marianne waved five fingers, she nodded and left.
Marianne didn’t want to leave the kitchen, and she was a little apprehensive about her summons. She was in the middle of a lobster risotto, but she’d found her new team to be very capable and she had no concerns handing over to one of the young commis chefs. This might be a very different kind of kitchen, but the creativity and the teamwork were what had always made her tick. And there was plenty of both here.
Kasia’s office was quiet in comparison to the kitchen and Kasia looked up and smiled when Marianne entered. When she was relaxed she was a different person entirely.
Marianne sat down in front of her and Kasia’s smile widened. “Bookings for the restaurant are up twenty per cent on last year.”
“That’s good to hear.”
“Your fans have a lot to do with that, as well as your amazing food.”
Marianne waited.
Kasia folded her hands. “We said we’d give this a month, and I’ll be happy to extend your contract to the end of the season, but I want to know that you’ve thought about your other options.”
Marianne sighed. “I have. I’ve talked to my mother, and I told her from the beginning I’m not going back there.”
“But surely, you’ve spoken with other restaurants? It seems unlikely no one’s approached you in this last month.”
Marianne shrugged. “I can’t say I haven’t heard from a few people, but they’re all back in Dublin. And most of them already have head chefs. I won’t be a part of someone losing their job because I might bring in more profit.”
“I don’t mean to interrogate you, Marianne. I just need reliability. And I don’t want you to take on something you’ll regret.”
She shrugged. “I get it. I’ve been giving it plenty of thought. I like working here a lot, but I’m still not sure if it’s the best thing for Denny and me to spend a summer on the island.” She thought of lovely Joey, though, and how much she enjoyed their company. That made the idea much more attractive.
“Have you talked to your wife about any of this? We’re a long way from Dublin and she’s Denny’s mum, too.”
Marianne wondered if Kasia’s own imminent parenthood was the reason for her concern.
“I’ve tried. She’s being really strange. She had a couple of video calls with Denny, to begin with, but she won’t agree to meet up. And now she’s not answering my calls.”
“So, she hasn’t seen him in a month? She must miss him so much.”
Marianne studied Kasia for a moment. She was her employer, and they hadn’t got off to a great start, but she appeared to be asking out of genuine concern. She didn’t have many friends. She tended to develop intense relationships with some of the people she worked with, but when she or they moved on, the relationships rarely survived. The one person she thought that wouldn’t happen with was Colette, but she’d destroyed that.
Kasia leaned forward. “If you need to talk about anything, we can take this off the record.”
Marianne nodded her gratitude. Why not? Joey would appreciate the break from being her solitary confidante.
“Amira pushed and pushed to have a baby. I’d never imagined having children, but she said our relationship needed something to hold us together. I didn’t want to lose her, so I agreed. She’s sixteen years older than me, so there was never really a discussion about who would carry him. We found a Turkish donor so Denny would have heritage in common with her, and we made it happen.”
Kasia nodded for her to continue.
“I fell in love with Denny the moment he was lifted to my chest. I have never, for a moment, regretted having him.”
“But?”
“He didn’t have the effect on our relationship we’d hoped for. Amira was disappointed she never felt a similar rush of love, and eventually she stopped trying. Although, she was good at bringing up my initial lack of maternal feelings whenever it served her to get one over on me.”
She cleared her throat. Kasia stood and retrieved a jug of water and a glass. Marianne nodded appreciatively and took the glass.
“Thank you.” She took a sip. Kasia waited for her to continue.
“My life became completely focused on the kitchen and caring for Denny. I would come home after work, spend some time with him, and after he went to bed, I’d down a bottle of wine to get to sleep. There was no room left for anything or anyone else, and I didn’t even see it.”
“But Amira was part of the relationship, too. What did she bring?”
“She begrudgingly looked after Denny when she had to. Her mother never really bonded with Denny either. Her mum’s approval is very important to her.”
“Families can be a big influence on how we live our lives.”
Marianne nodded and wondered about Kasia’s own background. “She always goes back to her compulsive behavior when she’s unhappy. I should’ve known we couldn’t carry on like that.”
“But you are where you are now, and you need to decide what’s best for Denny most of all.”
Marianne rubbed her face. “I know. Can I have twenty-four hours to talk to Amira and make a decision?” She stood, suddenly afraid she’d shared too much.
“Of course. Go back to your shift and we’ll talk before you start tomorrow.”
As she left the office, she turned. “Thanks, Kasia. I needed to talk some of that through.”
“Any time. My door is always open.”
Marianne rushed through the rest of her shift and drove Joey’s truck back across the island to relieve her childminder. Tierney had put her in touch with Bridie, an older island resident happy to mind Denny during the day in her little cottage in the village. But Marianne liked to get Denny settled and into his own bed at night, so Tierney had also provided her with the details of Aisling, her cousin, and the daughter of the island estate agent. Seventeen and sensible, Aisling was very happy to fund her weekend shopping trips to the city with some evenings in Marianne’s house.
“Hi, Aisling.” She found the girl doing her homework in the kitchen.
“Hi, Marianne.” She started packing up her bag. “Denny was brilliant. He went straight to sleep after a story, and I’ve not heard a peep since.”
“Grand, thank you.” She handed her some notes. “Same time on Thursday?”
“Sure, see you then.”
When she was alone, she went into Denny’s room and found him fast asleep. She kissed him and pulled the covers up over his back.
When she’d avoided the temptation of the wine in the fridge and made herself a cup of tea, she pulled out her phone and called Amira. The call rang out to voicemail. She gave up and threw down the phone. Where could Amira be? She was supposed to be staying with her mum. Marianne sighed as she picked up her phone again. She couldn’t think of anyone who she’d least like to speak to, but she needed to know if Amira was okay.
“Zeynep, how are you?”
“Marianne, I wasn’t expecting to hear from you.” The antagonism in her mother-in-law’s tone made her want to punch something.
“Why not? I’m your grandson’s mother. I need to speak to Amira and she’s not picking up. I wondered if you knew where she was.”
“Of course, I do. I’m taking care of her.”
“Okay, so where is she?”
“She was in a terrible state, so I’ve sent her to a health resort in Waterford.”
“Health resort? Do you mean that gambling rehab place you sent her before? It didn’t work so well last time, did it?”
“I will take care of my daughter in the way I see fit. You had your chance and you neglected her.”
“Neglected? I worked my ass off for our business.”
“For your career, Marianne, as always.”
Marianne took a deep breath. “Can you ask her to call me, please? We need to discuss how she maintains contact with Denny.”
“She’s in no condition to talk to you or make decisions. Sort out your own life and look after your child.”
Marianne ended the call before she said something she’d regret and lay down on the sofa. She had to take control of her future, even if it was only for the short term.
Denny ran toward Bridie with open arms, and she picked him up with a laugh.
Marianne felt a wave of relief that he enjoyed his time with the childminder. “Thanks for having him a little early. I’ve got a meeting.”
“It’s a pleasure; he’s a lovely boy. Are you going to say goodbye to your mama, Denny?”
Denny waved silently, but at least he was smiling. In moments of insecurity Marianne imagined him chatting away to everyone else the moment she left. She’d already witnessed how much more talkative he was in Joey’s company. Had she and Amira caused his slowness in speaking with their hostile environment? She hoped she could make things up to him. But how could she when she spent most of her time palming him off onto someone else?
She groaned as she pulled the truck into the Waterside’s car park and lowered her head onto the steering wheel. It always felt as though she wasn’t giving her best to anything. She didn’t spend enough time with her child, her career was on hold, she was married to someone she hadn’t spoken to in weeks.
She lifted her head and looked up at the gleaming white hotel. She’d found at least some semblance of normality here. A job where she was appreciated, a routine that was manageable, even if she wished she had more quality time with Denny. And of course, the reassuring presence of Joey, who’d turned into the dearest friend she could have asked for. Admittedly a little more than that, but friendship was what she desperately needed right now.
A few months here rebuilding her online following, getting her divorce sorted, and then she could go back to the capital with her head held high. Marianne walked into the Waterside with a new sense of positivity and the semblance of a plan. All she needed now was to convince Kasia she could be relied on for the rest of the summer. She went looking for her before her good mood could fade and found her hanging sheets on the line in the garden out back of the hotel.
Marianne was surprised how much of the work Kasia took on herself. She was happy to make beds or clean rooms. She just did what needed doing without complaint.
But kitchens ran differently, didn’t they? It was a more hierarchical setup. If Marianne had to take over the more basic tasks, it meant someone wasn’t doing their job properly, and that reflected badly on her.
“Are you going to stand and watch, or do you want to help me fold this sheet?”
Marianne jumped to attention. Running her kitchen effectively was one thing, but blatantly standing by while her employer worked was not acceptable. She grabbed the corners and helped Kasia hang the last sheet on the line.
When they’d done, Kasia sat down on the low wall. “So, you’ve made a decision?”
“I have. I’d like to stay for the summer, if you’ll have me.”
Kasia nodded slowly. “If it’s definitely the right decision for you, it works for us.” She held out her hand. “I’ll get a contract written up.” Her grip was less fierce than it had been a few weeks ago. Marianne hoped that was a sign Kasia was building trust and respect for her. This summer could be a long drag if they continuously clashed about her authority.
But if everything went well, this could be the perfect opportunity to recharge her batteries and prepare for her big return to the real world.