9. Holden
9
HOLDEN
T here has never been a time when I wasn’t focused on a dozen things at once. For as long as I can remember, my life has been a loud, Technicolor blur around me, overwhelming and all-consuming. Until now. Now, it’s as though everything has calmed and faded away, leaving me with just one thing. Her.
Lenora Vogel is standing in front of me with her shirt around her waist and a tiny white thong molded to her cunt, asking me to teach her how to fuck.
I might be shit at the other stuff, might have no idea what to do with the feelings for her that have been growing stronger by the day, but this? I can do this. I can give her a first time worth remembering. I can show her how fucking perfect her body is, and what she deserves from a lover, even if the thought of another man even looking at her makes me want to commit murder. That impulse can be dealt with later. At the moment, I have better things to think about.
Leni whimpers as I gather her top in my hands, dragging it down over her hips along with her panties, and my cock leaps at the sight of her bare for me. “You’re the sexiest thing I’ve ever seen.”
It’s the truth, and even if there is a spark of doubt in her dark eyes now, soon, she’ll know how deeply I mean those words. We aren’t leaving this bedroom until we’re crystal clear on that.
We kiss again, and my cock throbs in anticipation as her hands drift down my stomach to my briefs, pulling them aside so my length falls free, right into her waiting hands.
I can tell when she realizes what she’s feeling, as her lips still against mine and she looks between us, eyes widening. I feel myself grin. “You can touch it.”
Leni doesn’t hesitate, and I groan as her small, warm hand wraps more firmly around my cock, her thumb brushing over the lowest of my three piercings, a horizontal bar through the skin at the base of my shaft, topped on each side by a small, silver ball. All three are old, a relic of a particularly sex crazed part of my life, when fucking was the only thing important to me apart from my business. I don’t regret them, though, especially knowing what they’ll do for her.
“Does it hurt?” she asks tentatively, circling the piercing with her thumb.
Blowing out a long, rocky breath, I shake my head. “Not at all,” I assure her. “This one, here.” I cover her hand with mine, showing her how to play with it. “This one is for your clit.”
Leni lets out a breathy giggle. “I assumed as much.” Guiding her hand up, I have to bite my tongue to keep myself from groaning as her attention focuses on the second bar, running through the skin just below the flared head of my dick. “And this one?”
“Your G-spot,” I reply, and there’s no disguising the strain in my voice, or the way my dick twitches at her innocent question.
Precum is already leaking over the third and final piercing, a ring through the crown of my dick, and Leni’s breath catches along with mine as she slides her thumb over it. “Did you get them all at once?”
I nod, my jaw tight with the effort it takes to hold back and not lunge at her as she does it again. This is the most erotic moment of my life. Nothing and no one has turned me on more than this woman right now, and I’m determined not to rush this along. We have nothing but time. “Not a particularly pleasant experience, but I think you’ll be pleased I did.”
Emboldened, she tightens her grip, and this time, there’s no holding back the groan it draws from my chest. Leni’s eyes flick up, meeting mine, and I feel myself growing harder at the fire I see burning there. Neither of us says a word as she strokes me one more time, before her hands drift upward, working open the buttons of my shirt.
It falls to the bedroom floor with a quiet rustle, and Leni giggles, touching the dark ink that curls over both my arms, stopping a few inches above the place where my sleeves did. “I had no idea the Holden Ellinger wasn’t as professional as he lets on,” she teases, going to work on my T-shirt now.
“ Nobody is calling me professional.” I help her, pulling it over my head. There are tattoos on my chest, too, and Leni’s teeth find her bottom lip as she skims her fingers over them, raising goosebumps in her wake. “Bram would kill me if they were visible, though. A lot of our clients are on the old-fashioned side.”
Saying my partner’s name while I’m standing in front of his naked daughter, my cock brushing her flat stomach, is more than slightly fucked up. Leni doesn’t seem bothered, though, as she finally lifts her gaze to meet mine, a little smirk curving her full lips.
Outside the window of the bedroom, the sun is setting, and, cocooned in dying light, it dimly registers that the rest of the world could cease to exist beyond these four walls and I wouldn’t give a damn. Everything I need is right here.
Lifting my hands to her face, I lower my lips to hers, kissing her deeply. I’m not sure I could ever get used to the way she tastes or the delicate scent of apples that overwhelms my senses whenever she’s near. For months, fucking this woman was all I could think about. I’ve fantasized about this so many times, and yet I didn’t come close to how it would feel. Decades of wild, uninhibited sex didn’t prepare me even slightly for the effect Lenora Vogel has on me, or for the sensation of being flayed open, as vulnerable and exposed as she must feel.
As one, we step toward the bed, our lips still moving together, and our ragged breathing filling the quiet stillness of the room. Pulling away, I look down at her and, with a playful smirk, push her back onto the mattress. Leni falls with a breathless laugh, sprawling over the deep green quilt. Her right leg is bent, and my eyes catch on a deep red line just above her ankle. My heart lurches.
“Holden.” There’s the true first hint of apprehension in her voice as I reach out, covering the scar with my hand.
I ignore her. Lowering myself to my knees beside the bed, I turn my head, brushing my lips over her ankle and calf. Up close, I see there isn’t just one scar, but three, all colored in different shades of red. Pretending I don’t notice her trembling, I kiss each in turn, before turning my attention higher.
“Fuck, princess,” I hear myself rasp, and my fingers dig into her hips, pulling her closer to the edge of the bed. “You have the prettiest fucking cunt.”
A breathless little giggle greets this, one that turns almost instantly to a gasp as I guide two fingers through her seam and part them. Every inch of her is pink and slick with arousal. Mine . Every inch of her is mine . Groaning, I lean forward, sealing my mouth over her sex. There is nothing calculated or practiced about this. Every bit of practice I’ve had doing this might as well be nonexistent at this moment. I’m working on instinct and greed, driven out of my mind by the taste of her alone.
Leni’s warm thighs are bracketing my head, her fingers are tangled in my hair, and I am going to make her come so hard she becomes as addicted to me as I am to her. I’m not even inside her yet, and I’m desperate to be again.
I’m fucked.
I’m absolutely fucking fucked.
“Holden, oh my god —” My hand flattens on the toned expanse of stomach above her mound, holding her down as she arches off the bed, already reaching for her orgasm. My cock is alarmingly hard, and getting more painful with every whimper and soft, raspy cry from the woman before me. Focusing my attention on her clit, I bring my free hand up, guiding a single finger into her pussy.
Tight is a goddamn understatement. If I didn’t already know she was a virgin, I would now, and it’s dimly disturbing to realize how deeply it turns me on.
Mine .
Knowing what she needs, I add a second finger, and her thighs fall open wider, instinctively making room for me as she begins to shake. Seconds later, she’s coming. Arousal floods over my fingers, and I lick it up like a starving man, not stopping until she’s trying to push me away.
I’m not done, though. It could have been minutes or hours, but that wasn’t fucking enough .
“Holden, please,” she whines, “I’m so sensitive.”
Yeah, I can tell. Every time my tongue passes over her clit, she’s bucking and writhing. This woman made a career of mastering her own body, and it’s intoxicating to force her to abandon all that carefully held control. Looking up, I feel my dick grow impossibly harder at the flushed, wild look on her face. I shake my head. “One more.” And, keeping my eyes on hers to make sure she sees, I spit on her swollen clit.
“You’re so dirty,” she half-laughs, half-whines, her hands tightening in my hair as I lower my mouth again, starving for more of her cum.
My princess hasn’t even begun to see how dirty I can be, but she will. I’ve made her come once, and already I’m an addict. To illustrate the point, my fingers slip from her entrance, using her arousal to create a slick path between her cheeks to yet another hole I will be the first to fuck.
Leni is writhing, making noises that make my cock swell impossibly harder. The need to be inside her is becoming more urgent by the second, and I find myself grinding my hips down into the mattress in an unsuccessful attempt to relieve some of the ache.
How could I have ever resisted this woman? Whatever the delusion was, it’s gone now, and I’m certain I won’t get away with it again. It’s never been like this; the need burning beneath my skin goes so much deeper than lust.
“Do you like dirty, Len?” I ask, and my voice is so rough that if I hadn’t known it was me speaking, I wouldn’t recognize it.
She opens her mouth to respond, but the words turn to a scream as one of my fingers breaches the tight, hot opening of her ass, dipping just far enough to make her hips snap off the rumpled bedding beneath us and to fill the room with the sound of her pleasure.
“Holden, oh my god , I’m coming?—”
The sound of Lenora Vogel moaning my name as I tongue her clit and finger her virgin ass is enough to eviscerate whatever is left of my restraint. Latching onto her swollen bud, I suck the bundle of nerves desperately between my lips, creating a slow, pulsing rhythm that has her back arching off the bed in seconds.
As I crawl over her body, I’m filled with a deep, primal sense of pride. This woman is beautiful, wickedly intelligent, and—as much as she’d like to deny it—good all the way through. I might be wrong for her in every conceivable way, but she’s giving herself to me anyway, and I’m going to fucking take her.
Leni’s hands find my face when I’ve taken my place over her, her warm thighs wrapped around my hips and my arms braced at her sides. Our kiss is hot and frantic, and my tongue invades her mouth as I reach between us, gripping my shaft and guiding my tip to her slick entrance.
I press my damp forehead to hers, gazing down at her flushed cheeks and swollen lips, at her wide dark eyes and cute-as-fuck button nose, and I know that if I do this, I’ll never recover from her.
Leni’s sharp gasp splits the quiet of the room as I lower my hips, impaling her on my cock. I’ve never experienced anything close to this intense. I knew it would be good, but this? I don’t even have a word for what this is. The two orgasms did their job, allowing me to ease my way into her impossibly tight channel, inch by mind-blowing inch.
“There you go.” I nibble on her bottom lip, enjoying the burn of her nails digging into my shoulders and the promise of the marks they’ll leave behind. “You’re doing great, princess.”
She whines, her breath coming in shallow pants. “You’re such a prick.”
My lips skim over her cheekbone and down the side of her face as I pause, halfway in, fucking her in shallow thrusts. “Are you sure you want to insult me right now, Lenora?”
It’s the work of seconds to encircle her wrists with one hand, pressing them into the mattress above her head. I keep my eyes on her face, cataloguing every erotic reaction as I give her more and more, turned on beyond comprehension. Finally, I’m fully seated inside her, and I look between us at her opening straining around the thickness of my base.
I have to bite my tongue to stop myself from coming.
“Holden,” Leni sobs, pulling against my hold on her, but not hard enough to suggest she actually wants to be free. “Please!”
“You feel so fucking good, princess.” My free hand finds her jaw, tilting it up so she meets my eye as I start to fuck her. “Does it hurt?” I change the angle of my thrusts, ensuring my piercing grinds against her swollen clit.
“Yeah,” she admits, even as another moan joins the wet, crude sounds of me fucking her, and the quiet protest of the mattress beneath us. “It feels like you’re too big.”
A low chuckle rumbles in my chest, and I can’t resist lowering my lips to hers again, kissing her as my thrusts grow more unrestrained. She’s probably not wrong about me being too big. No doubt, on whatever evolutionary tree we tumbled free from, the five-foot-two ballerina wasn’t meant to end up beneath a six-foot-one man twice her age. Our size difference is yet another rule we’re breaking, and one that I can’t pretend doesn’t turn me on.
“You’re taking me so well, though.” I kiss her again, hard, as my balls draw up, preparing to unload inside her. We break apart, and I didn’t realize I’d released her wrists until they’ve flown around my back, her nails digging into my skin as I go harder. “Tell me how to make you come,” I plead, too far gone to consider stopping this now.
In response, Leni lets out a long, wanton moan, her body going taut as her inner walls clamp down on my dick. We come together, grinding in a mindless effort to extend the sensations washing over us that are—for me anyway—the most powerful of my life.
“Christ,” I croak, once the last of my pleasure has died away. Leni winces, hissing as I pull out, and I sit back on my knees between her obscenely spread legs, I stare down at the mess of creamy arousal, cum and pink trails of blood coating my dick, lower abdomen, and her inner thighs.
Neither of us speaks as I lean forward to kiss her stomach and get off the bed with a quick, reassuring smile. It’s not difficult to find the bathroom across the hall—which is jam-packed with an alarming quantity of women’s cosmetic products—and the neatly folded washcloths stacked on the shelf. As I wait for the water to run warm, I stare at my reflection above the sink, dizzy with shock at what just transpired.
I took Lenora Vogel’s virginity.
I said I wasn’t going to, knew full well it was a terrible idea, but I did it anyway. Driving over here, I’d suspected which tactics she was trying to employ, but it was such a relief to have a reason to give in, that I didn’t care.
Turning off the water, I cross the quiet hall back into Leni’s room, closing the door behind me. She’s pulling a sheet over herself, gazing at me through the muted light of the bedroom.
Vulnerable. More vulnerable than I’ve ever seen this brave young woman, who seems to have built up her defenses a mile high. Then again, who am I to judge? I’ve done the same thing.
Silent, I sit naked at the edge of the bed and pull away the sheet with a reproving look. Her pussy is slick with our combined releases, and pink and puffy from the rough treatment. It’s satisfying to watch her blush as I wipe her skin clean, apparently forgetting that I’ve now seen and touched every inch of her.
My cock twitches as I catch a glimpse of my cum welling at her entrance.
“I have an implant,” Len tells me quietly, and I glance up to see her touching a place on the back of her arm. “In case you were worried…”
“I had a vasectomy. Years ago.”
By now, I’ve seen the reaction this news often precipitates in women who were perhaps not as okay with a casual relationship as they assured me they were. Something inside my chest goes tense, waiting for either nonchalant disinterest or hastily concealed disappointment. I get neither. Instead, Leni smiles. “Not one for mini Ellingers?”
“Fuck, no.” I toss the cloth into the open laundry basket, and Leni scoots over, making room for me. Pausing only to retrieve my phone from the jumbled mess of clothes beside the bed, I lay back beside her, pulling the quilt over both of us.
“Me either,” she tells me casually, “I’m sure Honor will be mom of the year, but it’s the cool aunt life for me.”
It’s difficult to describe the feelings I’m experiencing as I look over at her. Relief, maybe? Excitement? It seems dangerous to examine it too closely. She doesn’t see me as a prospective boyfriend, she sees me as her father’s manwhore business partner, and it’s no one’s fault but my own.
Could I make her see me differently? Do I want her to?
It doesn’t take me long to answer my own question. Yes. I really fucking do.
Swallowing, I lift the phone, offering her a slight smile. “Do you want to order dinner and have sex again?”
Leni beams at me, and I wrap an arm around her shoulders, holding her close as we scroll through the dizzying array of deliverable food options, making commentary and jokes as we do. After the order is placed, though, we still don’t drift apart.
It seems comical that I believed, even a few days ago, that I had any control at all when it comes to falling for someone.