Epilogue
Three years later
I t was the front door slamming that brought him back to reality, allowing the nerves that had been rattling his senses to finally vanish.
Rowan inhaled deep serenity, wiping his clammy palms against the back of his jeans before picking Praline up. The cat meowed at the disturbance, her nap being interrupted by the tattooed man, before settling further into the warmth of his chest.
“Sorry, P,” he whispered. “But your mama’s home. Let’s go say hi.”
He could feel his heart thumping so wildly that he wondered if he had ever felt this nervous before.
“Rowan?”
Avery’s voice resonated in the foyer, a wave of solace dancing towards him. He rushed down the staircase, grinning at the sight before him. She was busy taking her shoes off, her luggage already placed against the wall with her tote bag resting atop it.
As much as he had loved his small town house in Knightsbridge where memories remained eternal—parties, a first date with Avery involving uncooked pasta that had led to opening up, and amazing, breathtaking sex—this new place was home . He and Avery had purchased this country house a few months ago, and he loved this slow, quiet life—a stark contrast to his everyday routine that consisted of racing at full speed.
“Bonjour,” he said excitedly, wrapping his free arm around her shoulders. He placed a lingering kiss on her forehead, her perfume already rendering him powerless and on the cusp of bringing him to his knees. “How’s my girl doing?”
Avery chuckled and pecked him on the lips before kissing the top of Praline’s head. “Still the same as earlier.”
After the Belgian Grand Prix where she had jumped into his arms after his win, they had to separate to fulfil their respective duties. He had left the circuit before her and caught a flight with his team back to London. He had arrived home three hours ago, giving him enough time to prepare the surprise.
“Tired?” he asked in a murmur, brushing a rogue strand of hair away from her cheek.
“Exhausted.” Yet a smile broke free on her lips. Yet her eyes shone with happiness. He cocked his head at the brightness emanating from her, like golden threads dancing around them. She was glowing, was absolutely exquisite.
Rowan didn’t know a single person who worked harder than Avery. She always tended to give her all in her job to make Miles happy, to be appreciated by the people surrounding her. And he knew her efforts never went unnoticed.
When he grinned, her gaze dropped to his dimple. “I ran a bath for you.”
Slight surprise flashed in her eyes. “You did?”
Rowan hummed and let their cat down. He watched Praline stretch out before strutting towards the living room. “How about you go relax? I’ll bring you a glass of wine. We can order some food tonight and watch your favourite movie.”
She watched him suspiciously, her gaze narrowed as it sauntered from his face down his body. He’d already showered and eaten a snack after coming back from the airport. Usually, he would celebrate the Grand Prix—no matter his result—until dawn, but he couldn’t bother to party today because he had a surprise to prepare. One of the biggest importance.
“You want something from me.” Not a question, but rather a straightforward statement that made him chuckle wryly.
“I do?”
“Yes. What is it? Did you break something? Did you burn something? Do you need money?”
Rowan snorted before placing his hand on the small of her back, urging her towards the stairs. “Baby, I’m a multi-millionaire. I can give you the damn fucking moon. And no, I didn’t do anything.”
She only hummed in contemplation and marched upstairs, allowing him to marvel at the generous curves of her backside.
“What?” he asked. “Can’t I do nice things for my girlfriend?”
She only peered at him over her shoulder and lifted a brow. He pinched her bottom and slapped it, but when they attained the top of the staircase, the amusement filling his senses diminished.
“I’m in the mood for Indian food.” She hadn’t noticed the sudden nervousness taking over him as she aimed for their bedroom.
But all Rowan could hear was the loud and rapid thud of his heartbeat.
“Whatever makes you happy, sunflower.”
He rubbed the back of his neck, took a deep breath in, and followed Avery into the bedroom.
A soft gasp rose from her throat, and she stopped walking. Rowan felt time stop. Felt the world cease spinning. Felt his heart flip upside down.
He peered at her expression, his lungs tightening at the sight of utter awe and admiration etched on her features. The blinds were down, the whole room swamped in darkness save for the bright constellations illuminating the ceiling that put in evidence the rose petals scattered across the floor and the bed.
One of their favourite songs resonated in the background, but not loud enough to conceal the deafening thrum of his pulse.
Avery brought a trembling hand to her lips as she peered heavenwards, mumbling, “Oh my god.”
Marry me was written with stars in the stellar sky.
Discreetly, Rowan reached towards the console to his left, and grabbed the velvet box he had hidden behind a photo frame. He dropped to one knee just as she pivoted to face him.
A small sob rose from the back of her throat as she gaped at the diamond ring displayed before her.
“Rowan…”
He couldn’t control the tears misting over his eyes, and he smiled broadly, tremors racking through his body. His voice, though, didn’t waver as he said, “If there’s one thing I’m certain about, it’s that we’re meant to be together. Meant to spend this lifetime and all the next ones together. If there’s one thing I’m positive about, it’s that I’m yours and you’re mine. Avery, I love you. I love you so much that sometimes I can’t breathe. I want to spend the rest of my life loving you, travelling the world with you, and watching you shine so bright and thrive in everything you do. I want to spend each day waking up next to you and listening to your voice, to the joyful chuckles of yours that are like the soundtrack to my life. Marry me, Avery.”
Rowan watched a tear stream down her face, a smile full of adoration spreading across her lips.
He swore he’d seen the subtle nod of her head, but all she said was, “Oh my god, Rowan.” Then scrambled off to the en-suite dressing room.
He was still kneeling, downright confused by her response. He’d been expecting tears, smiles, giggles, and the cliché “a million times, yes” but not… that. Not her running away.
He cleared his throat and frowned, glancing at the ring. The beautiful diamond that Zoya, Avery’s mother, had helped him choose.
“Avery,” he droned. “You’re supposed to say yes.”
He’d been positive she’d agree. Unless she wasn’t ready, which he doubted.
“I’m looking for something in my lingerie drawer.”
He blushed, unsure of how to act. How to feel. Had she rejected him? Had she not wanted this? They had talked about it, more than once—about marriage, eventual children. Rowan couldn’t understand her reaction.
“I’m flattered, but I just asked you to be my wife and—”
She came back hurriedly and kneeled before him, then popped open a squared box where lay a silver band.
“Marry me, Rowan.”
He choked on air, his eyes widening at her demand. She was so unpredictable and unexpected.
“I was going to propose to you,” she murmured when he couldn’t find a sliver of strength to form a single coherent thought. “During our vacation in Australia.”
He felt a tear escape his eye as he looked into her star-filled gaze, glinting with so many emotions. “Are you serious?”
She nodded, her beautiful smile never faltering. “I knew I loved you the moment I couldn’t get you out of my head. I loved you the moment you saw me and never walked away. No one gets me like you do, no one renders life as exciting as you can. I want to marry you, and I know our life will be filled with so much joy and nurtured by the power of our love.”
Rowan swallowed the lump in his throat a moment before releasing a long, shaky exhale. “God fucking damn it, Avery. You’re absolutely insane.”
She chuckled and plucked the silver band out of the box. “I take that as a yes.”
Her small hand grabbed his left, trembling one. The ring hovered above the tip of his finger, but she looked at him, gentle and loving, waiting for a clear response. He was absolutely starstruck, not believing she’d beat him at his own game.
“Yes,” he breathed. “Of course I’ll marry the hell out of you.”
Avery chuckled, the melody feeding his soul. “That’s what I thought.”
Slipping the ring on his finger, Rowan shook his head in disbelief before taking the one meant for her, setting the box down.
“Your turn,” he murmured, kissing the back of her hand.
The way she looked at him made him weak. He felt an invisible force squeeze his heart before releasing it to allow it to ricochet inside his chest.
She spoke with such softness. “I’ll marry you in this life and the one after. Every lifetime we get to live together.”
Rowan’s cheeks hurt because of how much, how wide he was smiling. He put the ring on her finger, planting another kiss on her knuckles.
“It’s beautiful.” She raised her hand to eye level and gaped at the engagement ring. Gratitude shone in her dark eyes, and Rowan nearly sobbed at the sight. “I’m going to be your wife.”
Reaching out to her, he cupped her face and brushed a tear away from her cheekbone. “I told you,” he said. “Three years ago. Told you I’d marry you.”
He’d already known then that he wanted an eternity with Avery. Because she was the missing piece he’d searched for his entire life. The completeness to his soul and the salvation to his once broken heart.
Her kiss was gentle, sweet—a kiss in which she poured all her unwavering feelings for him through the entwine of their breaths and the tangle of their tongues.
“I love you,” Rowan whispered against her lips.
“I know.” She kissed him fiercely. “It’s an honour to be loved by you.”
It had become their thing—they didn’t need to say it back to let the other know how much they were adored.
With an effortless movement, Rowan hoisted Avery up and laid her on the bed, their lips still locking and their tongues still battling for dominance.
Cupping her jaw, his other hand came to grip the outside of her thigh, locking her leg around his hip whilst her fingers fisted the front of his shirt.
When he backed away, she surged forward to chase another kiss, but he only stared down at her, his breath catching.
“You are so beautiful,” he whispered. The constellations reflected a silvery glow upon her face, drawing minuscule stars on her skin. And just like that, she was the only thing that mattered most to him. An ethereal divine being. A shooting star in his chaotic orbit. “My fiancée. That has a pretty nice ring to it.”
“Sure does, lover boy.”
Rowan peppered light and tender kisses on her throat, the side of her neck, and below her ear, pushing his already hard cock into her centre, making her writhe and exhale a breathy moan.
Rowan made haste to undress her, his world coming to a stop when he looked at the red set of lingerie clinging to her body. “Bloody hell. This is so sexy.”
She only kissed him, and he took care of peeling off the last layers of so-called clothing until she was bare before him, but she didn’t allow him to touch her until he, too, was naked.
His hands found her waist, her silken skin a song of delicacy and pure heaven beneath his callouses. They roamed over her skin as he and Avery kissed without catching a breath, his hands finding her full and heavy breasts. He grunted at the feeling, grazing her peaked nipples with his thumbs before palming them—remembering the feeling as though he hadn’t already memorised it. Rowan tried not to linger on the fact her breasts felt more firm than usual because she wrapped her hand around his cock, a gentle stroke to weaken him.
He whimpered into Avery’s mouth, bucking into her hand as she stroked him hard and fast, just like he liked it.
“Fuck,” he said huskily. “Let me wreck that soaked cunt of yours.”
She arched off the bed when his teeth grazed the spot between her neck and shoulder. “Say please.”
“Avery,” he warned. He didn’t want to play games today. No, he needed to make love to her. Over and over again. Sometimes sweet and slow, sometimes rough, and hard, and brutal. He’d fuck her until they were spent.
A gasp fled past her lips when his fingers dipped to her core, collecting her arousal before pressing on her clit, drawing slow, torturous circles.
“Always so drenched for me.”
“Rowan,” she breathed out. “More.”
He smirked. “Say please.”
She scoffed. When her nails brushed the underside of his erection, he groaned in pleasure and unleashed himself to fuck her hand. Avery used the momentum of distraction to flip them over and straddled him.
The corner of his lips didn’t move down. “I like where this is going. Go ahead, use me.”
“It seems like you don’t really know what you want,” she prompted.
Rowan narrowed his gaze, two fingers sliding through her wetness to plunge inside her. Her lips parted, her gaze heady with desire.
“Oh, trust me,” he said, “I do. I want to watch you ride your future husband.”
“You love your new title so much.”
He winked, noting the tinge of crimson colouring her tanned cheeks. “How could I not?”
She started riding his hand, her breaths staggering, but he withdrew his fingers before pleasure could overtake her senses.
Rowan brought his fingers up to her mouth, and she sucked them clean without needing instructions.
“That’s my good fucking girl. Come on, let me see how my cock fills you up.”
He braced both hands behind his head, and she scoffed softly at his indolent behaviour as he observed her stunning body. Those thighs he loved so much. That curvy waist. Those generous tits nearly making him drool with lust.
Using a hand to lubricate the tip of his shaft against her centre, she rolled her hips to tease him, then slowly, slowly, sank until he was buried to the hilt.
“Fuck. Me.” She was tight, wet, perfectly made for him.
“Patience, darling.” Avery’s hands found his pectorals, her fingertip grazing his sunflower tattoo.
She started undulating her hips, keeping her gaze locked to his. A moan escaped the back of Rowan’s throat when she lifted herself before sinking back down in a swift motion. Repeat. Up and down, until they were panting hard.
“You ride me so well,” he praised, watching her breasts bounce.
Taking them into his hands, he played with her nipples until her moans became louder and her movements more frantic. A bead of sweat dripped between the valley of her breasts, her beautiful skin coated with a thin sheen of perspiration.
“Come here,” he ordered, pulling her towards him.
Their lips met in a messy kiss as he pushed on his heels to buck into her drenched core.
“Harder,” she asked, breathless.
Rowan grabbed her hips, pounding into her from below, a moan escaping. One of his hands descended to her generous bottom to slap it, hard. “You like that? You don’t want me to make sweet love to you, huh? You want to be fucked like the brat you are?”
Avery whimpered, nails digging into his flesh. He brought his mouth to her nipple, sucking and biting lightly, then repeated the action on the other one.
“Answer me.” Another slap on her bottom. The tips of his fingers pressed into her flesh as he pounded recklessly into her, guttural moans echoing and blending with the sound of skin slapping.
“Yes,” she said, panting.
Rowan withdrew and pushed her off him. “On all fours.”
She obliged in a heartbeat, and Rowan couldn’t help but grunt at the wetness gleaming before him. The mixture of both their pleasure dripping down the inside of her thigh.
Wrapping a hand around the base of his cock, he pumped a few times, admiring the view before latching his mouth to her clit. Avery fell forward, parting her legs further apart to allow him to plunge his tongue into her entrance.
He spat on her cunt. “You get me so hard all the fucking time.”
He devoured her with abandon, switching between lapping fiercely at her clit and dragging his tongue flat-out against her folds all the while stroking his aching cock.
When he felt his balls tighten and his length twitch, he stopped abruptly before hovering above Avery’s back, nudging the tip of his erection to her entrance. He needed to come inside her.
Not giving her a moment of rest, he slid right into home, thrusting restlessly as he gripped her hips tightly enough to leave bruises. It had happened before, but every time he’d apologised by kissing the marks softly. She’d chuckled and called him adorable, thanking him.
“You feel so fucking good.”
She only moaned at the praise and fisted the bed sheets so tightly that her knuckles whitened.
He continued to plunge in and out, reaching over to fist her dark hair into a makeshift ponytail. She couldn’t contain her moans as she arched her back, crying out his name.
His name dribbling like sin on the tip of her tongue was nearly his undoing.
“Don’t stop. I’m close.”
Rowan could feel her walls tighten around his throbbing shaft. He leaned forward, his chest coming in contact with her sweat-damped back and reached around to play with her clit. His fingers applied the perfect amount of pressure to make her writhe beneath his touch.
“Just like that,” she panted.
Rowan kissed the back of her neck, her shoulder, her spine, and continued to hit the exact spot that made her tremble in pleasure until she came with a loud moan, her entire body shaking. The pulsing and clenching of her walls around his cock sent him over the edge, his physique spasming as he released deeply into her before stilling, ragged breaths and soft moans echoing inside the room.
Rowan was spent.
He had fucked Avery not once, not twice, but three times already. The second time was sweet and slow, initiated by him after he’d kissed her entire body which was still recovering from the previous orgasm. The third one had been quick, yet rough in the shower.
As she sat with her legs crisscrossed, her wet hair falling down her back, and wearing his shirt, Rowan found her to be the sexiest and most beautiful woman. But as the tip of his fingers drew shapes on her bare legs, he was thinking of burying his tongue between them. Of having her sit down on his face whilst she’d suck his—
God, he needed to get a grip.
He smiled at the sight of her engagement ring. Looked down at the band adorning his finger.
Avery was his.
He was hers. Utterly so.
She pushed her glasses up the bridge of her nose whilst scrolling through her phone, probably looking for something to eat.
“Why are you looking at me like that?” She put the phone aside and placed a kiss on his forehead.
“Because I’m trying to realise you’re mine.”
All these years, he’d watched her from afar and found himself completely enthralled by the person she was. All these years, he pretended to hate her because it was easier than admitting he was attracted to someone so out of his league. All these years, he loved her because she had always been able to see something in him that no one else had dared to glimpse at.
She lifted her left hand. “Does this help?”
He lifted a shoulder in a tantalising shrug. “Even when you’ll become Mrs. Emerson, I'll have a hard time realising it.”
“Why?”
Rowan ducked his head, smiling timidly. A blush bloomed on his cheeks. “I always thought you were out of my league. Too perfect and good for me.”
Avery lifted her brows in stupefaction. “And to think I thought you would never see me this way… Look at us now.”
He propped himself on an elbow and grabbed her hand to kiss her inner wrist.
“I have one more surprise for you,” she murmured.
Rowan sat up and watched her disappear once again into the closet.
She came back with a small bag that she gently gave him, as she stayed standing next to the bed, hands folded before her, fidgeting nervously with the bracelet adorning her wrist.
“Two gifts in a day?” he teased, raising a brow. “You must be needing something from me.”
She laughed and rolled her eyes. No amusement was decipherable through her tone, though, only slight nervousness. “Look inside the bag.”
A red fabric lay at the bottom of it. Rowan took it out and unfolded it, his heart refusing to function when he understood what it was.
“Avery…”
He had barely been able to hear his trembling voice. He didn’t even know if he had managed to speak.
He was holding a racing suit—a baby’s. With Primavera Racing’s logo, his name, and number on the back. Releasing a quivering breath, he looked up at Avery through a blurry vision, an enormous lump building inside his throat.
She was smiling behind the hand shielding her mouth, her engagement ring glittering. Her eyes shone with tears and joy and excitement. “I’m pregnant.”
Rowan lunged at her, tiny racing suit left forgotten on the bed, and wrapped his arms around her waist as he spun them around. He emitted a strange sound, a mix between a scream of joy, a howl, and a sob all at once.
“We’re having a baby?” He put her down on her feet before cradling her to his chest, one hand holding the back of her head as he brought her ear to his pectoral where his heartbeat battered erratically.
Tremors rattled through Rowan’s body, setting his vessels on fire. He fell to his knees, unable to hold back his tears, and wrapped his arms around the back of her thighs, peppering small kisses upon her clothed stomach.
“There’s a baby in you. My baby,” he murmured. “We’re really going to be parents?”
“We are,” she said softly, emotions stuck in her throat. Gently, Avery cradled his face and forced him to look up. He obliged, through teary eyes, and chuckled.
Though he struggled to stand on his wobbling knees, he managed to rise and embrace Avery tightly. “This is the best day of my life.”
They stayed in this position for a while, holding each other and trying to grasp this new reality. Rowan kissed the crown of her head, continuously so, murmuring how thankful he was for her, for their future together.
They moved to the bed after a while of crying, laughing, accepting their new life. Avery lied down, and Rowan bunched her shirt up to the lower swell of her breasts. He placed a kiss on her stomach, another one on her navel, another one on the side of her belly.
“Hey, you,” he murmured. “It’s me, your dad.”
Peering up at Avery, he watched stars shine in her eyes.
“We’re having a baby,” he told her again as though he couldn’t believe it. She only nodded, smiling. “What size is it now?”
She passed her fingers through his damp hair. “According to my app, it’s only the size of a raspberry.”
Rowan’s eyes widened. “It’s tiny.”
“So, so small. I’m entering my eighth week.”
His throat tightened. His chest swelled. He felt a powerful wave of protectiveness surge through him, needing to keep his girl and their child safe. This feeling of ecstasy, of unwavering joy… He never wanted it to fade away as he imagined their future. Though he was terrified of becoming a father, he wouldn’t let the fear take away his only source of happiness.
Rowan came to lie down by her side, propping himself on an elbow and using his free hand to caress her stomach. “Eight weeks? When did you—”
“Just last week,” she cut in. “I needed an appointment at the doctor’s for confirmation. And then I needed a suit to be made to tell you.”
“Wow,” was all he could muster. Rowan felt like he was floating in a fever dream.
“You’re happy, right?”
The sound of her brittle voice made his chest ache. He cupped her chin, bringing her gaze to him before he leaned in to kiss her lips softly. “I’ve never been happier.”
“This is so scary, though.”
Of course, it was. She was still young—only twenty-six—and travelled the world for a living. He, too, was still racing and thriving, but he didn’t let the disquietude obliterate his happiness. They hadn’t planned on having a child for a while. Still, Rowan had never experienced such joy. “I know, but it’s okay. We’re going to be great parents. I just hope our kid isn’t as infuriating as you.”
Avery whacked his chest playfully before glancing down at her belly. Rowan shifted to kiss her stomach again, smiling against her skin when she chuckled.
He laid his head on her bare stomach, listening to the even thump of her pulse. He closed his eyes, imagining what life would look like in five years. Either a mini-Avery or a mini-Rowan running around, wanting to follow his path and become a racer.
A frown settled on his brows when a shattering thought washed over him.
What if—
“What’s wrong?” Avery asked in a whisper, fingers tangling through his locks.
He opened his eyes and swallowed. “What if I’m a terrible father? What if—”
“You’ll be the best,” she assured fiercely, her hand moving to cup his cheek. He leaned into her electric touch. “You are not your father—never have been. You’re an extraordinary man who will bring so much light and joy to our child’s life. You bask in shimmering golden light. You have a mindset made of steel that keeps you from falling back into darkness. You are good, and brave, and everything a woman dreams of having as both a husband and the father of her children. Don’t you start thinking you won’t be good enough, because you know you are. And I know that you will not allow your kid to have the same life as you did. You’re going to give him, or her, the best life ever. Filled with love, travelling,and so much racing.”
Rowan loosened a breath and only nodded, letting her words imprint themselves into his mind.
“You’re going to be the best Mama ever,” he said. “I hope this kid is as feisty as you.”
She lifted her brows. “You won’t be able to handle both of our attitudes.”
“Watch me.” He drew circles around her belly button, content. “I bet it’s a boy.”
Avery smacked his shoulder gently. “No bets. I’ve had enough with Tate’s.”
“He already knows?”
Rowan smiled at the thought—of his best friend with his kid. Yeah, that child was in good hands.
“He was there when I took the first test. I was having bad morning sickness, so he suggested I take a test.”
Rowan frowned. “Where was I?”
“Doing PR stuff with Tito.”
Rowan scoffed. “I can’t believe he knew before me.”
“He cried. Then scooped me up. Kissed my cheek. And I vomited again.”
He barked out a laugh, grinning so wide his cheeks were hurting again.
Before he could say anything, a phone vibrated. “Speaking of the devil,” she said before taking the call.
“Hey, Uncle Tate,” she chimed, putting the call on speaker. Rowan gaped at her, utterly in love and never wanting a life where she wasn’t in it.
“So?” Tate’s deep voice resonated excitedly. “Did he say yes? I need to win the bet with Julia and Riley. I said you two would get engaged within three years.”
Avery chuckled. “You knew he was going to propose too, though, didn’t you?”
The only response was Tate howling.
At that moment, Rowan knew everything was going to be all right.