Chapter 41 The Confrontation
Chapter forty-one
The Confrontation
Shepherd Kingsley
The entire walk to Coach’s office I’m chased after by a storm cloud of dread.
As much as I reassured both my teammates and Jasmine last night, I’m not certain how this is going to go.
I woke up this morning—after tossing and turning for hours—to an email from Bash telling me to meet him in his office this morning.
Not a text or a call, an email. And not meeting at his house or even him coming by my dorm.
He wants to meet in his office on a Sunday, when everyone in the athletics department is likely at home. Those details don’t bode well.
On another day, I might enjoy the crisp bite to the air or the leaves crunching under my shoes. But today, all I can focus on is how every step brings me closer to facing my doom.
When I finally make it to the athletics building, my stomach is in knots.
The pumpkin muffin I ate this morning suddenly feels as though Jasmine formed it out of concrete.
I pull open the glass door to the building, and I’m greeted by large high-definition photographs of players past. The best of the best in all sports, but since the Thrashers football program was the greatest in the nation, most of the photos featured them. One of which is my brother.
I pause at Jason’s photo. It’s a snapshot from a game I was glued to the TV for.
A rivalry week game where he threw a touchdown to win in the last minute.
I remember wondering how he kept such a level head.
Not once did he look worried. It was as if he knew the entire time that they were going to win.
I’ve never felt that confident when we were down points. Maybe that’s why we lost.
My eyes drop to the gold plaque beneath the photo.
Jason Kingsley, quarterback, Heisman winner, undefeated.
I stare at the last word until my eyes burn. If I somehow manage to be worthy enough for my picture to be put up here, it will never say that. Jasmine showed me I don’t have to have that title to be cared for, but it still stings seeing it in black and white.
I glance down at my watch. It wouldn’t be a good look to be late after breaking a major rule in a public fashion.
My steps echo through the empty halls. Coach’s door is open when I get to it. He’s sitting behind a huge wooden desk that would make anyone else look small, but not him. His attention is focused on some papers on his desk, but when I step over the threshold, he looks up.
“Come in and take a seat.” He doesn’t need to raise his voice for me to know it’s a command. That’s always been the case for Bash, long before I got here.
“Yes, sir,” I say quietly.
I take a seat in a leather chair across from him.
The door to his office shuts with no assistance.
I found out from Jason that there’s a button under Coach’s desk.
An intimidation tactic. It works. Not that he needs it when he has a scarily calm demeanor so opposite the relaxed one he has day-to-day.
Once, in a rare speech at a team dinner, MJ called Bash the noon to her midnight.
I think most would agree with that, but right now the look he’s giving me is a thunderstorm that wakes you up at 3:00 a.m.
“Care to explain this?” he asks, before sliding a tablet across the desk toward me.
I swallow and press play on the awaiting video, which looks like it was taken off social media.
It’s an edit to a popular song. Whoever made it timed the music to crescendo with me hitting the creep and then drop when Jasmine kissed me.
The video is incredibly cinematic given that it was made by a random person on the internet.
If I was watching it under different circumstances, I’d be impressed.
“The guy was a drunk creep who tried to touch Jasmine. I’m sorry that the video got out. I can make a statement to the press if I need to, and I understand if disciplinary actions need to take place.” I do my best to choose my words carefully, but it feels like someone is shaking me internally.
Bash levels me with a look. “You know that’s not why I called you in here.”
I slowly nod, trying to find the right words.
Bash starts talking again before I do. “I gave you a simple rule and you assured me, as captain, that it would be followed. Then you break it, in public, essentially telling every player on the team that you don’t take me seriously.”
“I’m sorry, Coach. It was a spur-of-the-moment thing—”
“Of course it was. I thought you’d learn from your brother’s mistakes, but it seems you’re determined to be his junior in more ways than on the field.”
I grip the arms of my chair. “Respectfully, sir, that is not the case. I didn’t have a drop of alcohol. I haven’t, and I don’t ever plan on drinking. And if I could have a chance to explain, I could show you that you’re mistaken.”
His brows shoot up. “Mistaken? I think the video, along with your behavior lately, has told me enough. It’s obvious you’ve been distracted by girls, and that’s fine, but you won’t drag Jasmine into it.”
My behavior? He must mean the loss. My blood runs hot.
“She kissed me!” I raise my voice, then lower it when he glowers. “The video proves at least that much, but I’ve been trying to explain that while the kiss might have been unplanned, our relationship was not.”
Bash stays silent. I take that as my cue to continue.
“We’ve been dating since the day after the Carolina game. We both wanted to tell you, but I thought it would be best to let the dust settle in the team first. Give us a chance to regroup before we explained things to you.”
“So, let me get this straight, you’re telling me that not only did you break a rule after getting into an altercation, but you’ve been keeping your relationship a secret for weeks?”
“We were going to ask to have dinner with you tonight. That’s why I called Friday,” I say quietly, feeling the dejection set in. This isn’t going at all like I hoped.
He shakes his head. “Give me one good reason not to bench you, Junior, because I can’t find one.”
“Would you stop calling me that?” The question bursts out of me before I can stop it.
He rears back, caught off guard as much as I am.
I shoot up out of the chair and pace to the door, my hands pulling at my hair.
“I can handle it from the press. I can take it on the chin. But from you?” I turn around, emotion clamping down on my windpipe.
“I look up to you. My dad doesn’t care, you know?
And I just—” I scrub my face, hating that I can’t get the words out.
Bash’s shoulders relax, some of the tension leaving him. “That’s just a nickname.”
“You say that, but then I come in here and I don’t get the benefit of the doubt.
I get Jason’s past tacked onto me.” I throw my hands in the air.
“I can’t figure out whether you want me to be him or not.
I spend every second of my life trying to get you and everyone else to look at me for my first name and not my last, but it never works. And I’m sick of it.”
Bash looks up at me, his expression torn. “Is that really how you feel?”
I nod, tears stinging my eyes. I clench my jaw and try to keep them at bay.
“I’m not him.” My voice cracks. “And I can’t keep killing myself trying to be better than him, either. Jasmine showed me that.”
He stands up.
“Coach, I—I love her,” I stumble over the admission.
He visibly tenses again. I worry we’ve taken a step forward and two back.
“You still went behind my back. She’s my family, Shepherd. You understand why this would upset me, right?”
“I know you want to protect her. I promise I want the same thing. Hopefully the first part of the video shows that.”
He shakes his head. “That doesn’t change what you did by hiding.”
“We were going to tell you, Coach. And I wasn’t trying to undermine you. I just felt stuck, and we were both scared of disappointing you.”
“Both of you?” His brow furrows. “Jasmine was afraid to tell me?”
I nod. “I think you two should talk, though, so I won’t share more on her behalf.
” I almost leave it at that, but in desperation, I keep going.
“Whatever it takes to prove that I’m serious about her, I’ll do it.
And I’ll take any consequences for breaking the rule without complaint.
Even…” I straighten my shoulders. “Even being benched.”
He runs a hand down his face and sighs. It’s silent for a moment—so silent all I can hear is my own breathing. Then, he nods to himself, rounds the desk, and pulls me in for a tight hug. I freeze in place, my arms stuck by my side in shock.
“I’m sorry, son,” he says as squeezes me tight.
“For not hearing you out, and for making you feel like you weren’t worthy of being known just as you are.
You’re a good player and an even better man.
” He pats me on the back twice, then pulls back.
The tears I’ve been holding back start to slip out of my control. “I’m proud of you, Shepherd.”
Well, that’ll do it. I swipe at my face, trying to get rid of the tears as fast as possible. Bash’s eyes are shining too, though, which helps me feel a little better.
“You’re like a son to me. I don’t know why your dad isn’t more invested in your and your brother’s lives. It doesn’t make sense to me. But I’m happy to have you as a part of my family.”
“Okay,” I rasp out. “You can stop now. I don’t know if I can take any more.”
He chuckles. “I’m afraid I’m not done yet.
My wife might wring my neck if I don’t give you the apology you deserve.
I shouldn’t have brought up Jason’s past. Not just because it’s unfair to you, but because it’s unfair to the man he’s become.
I love both of you. It’s just, I also love Jasmine.
” He scratches the back of his neck. “And when I heard some of you talking about cheerleaders, I lost all sense. As a coach, I should be better than that.”
I shrug. “I punched a guy for her, and granted he was a total creep, but I’d punch someone for a lot less when it comes to her.”
He laughs, and I join in. He gives me another hug. “I really am sorry.”
“It’s okay,” I say as I hug him back. “I’m sorry for hiding things from you.”
He pulls back and grips my shoulders. “From now on, I want you to tell me if I make you feel like I’m comparing you to Jason. And if you want me to help fend off the press more, I can do that too. I have no issues with beating off vultures.”
I smile. “Thanks, Coach. And Jasmine? Are things okay there?”
He draws in a deep breath and lets it out in a whoosh. “I’ll talk to the team about the rule, and…as long as you don’t turn into a complete idiot overnight and break her heart, you have my blessing.”
My grin widens. “Thank you. I promise I won’t hurt her.”
“I’ll hold you to that. I guess I should call so I can apologize to her too.”
Frantic knocking sounds at the door.
“Bash, wait, I need to talk to you!” Jasmine’s voice shouts.
“I guess you won’t have to make that call after all,” I say with a laugh.
It wasn’t in the plan for her to show up here, but in true Jasmine fashion, she must have made her own plan. Bash walks over and opens the door. Jasmine practically falls inside.
“Jaz, are you all right?” Bash asks.
She nods, though she’s breathing heavily, then looks at him with fire in her eyes. “We need to talk about boundaries.”
I suck in a breath. This ought to be interesting.