Chapter 42 Falling Like Leaves
Chapter forty-two
Falling Like Leaves
Jasmine Chamberlain
“Boundaries?” Bash asks, a mixture of confusion and concern in his gaze.
“Yes, boundaries,” I huff out, trying to catch my breath.
I spent the morning psyching myself up to face him.
When I got Shepherd’s text that he was going to the meeting, I entered a game of mental tug-of-war.
I walked into Marigold’s room and word vomited my every thought about the matter.
She looked at me over the rim of her coffee mug, crumpled papers scattered over her desk, and told me to grow up and tell Bash how I felt.
Apparently, she hadn’t slept that night and didn’t have the energy to pull punches.
But it was exactly what I needed, so I couldn’t be mad at her.
My conclusion came a little late, though, so I ran here as fast as I could in hopes that I could keep Bash from doing anything irrational.
“You can’t bench Shep,” I say, trying to hold his gaze but settling for the collar of his shirt. I can feel Shepherd’s eyes on me.
“I didn’t—”
“And it was wrong of you to make a rule that players can’t date cheerleaders because of me—”
“I’m sorry about that—”
“I’m grateful that you’re protective over me—” I stop, and look up at him. His words catch up in my brain. “Wait, you didn’t bench him?”
There’s a touch of amusement in his expression. I look at Shepherd, who’s smiling at me. He shakes his head. I swivel back to Bash.
“And you’re sorry about the rule?” I clarify.
He nods. “I was a little overzealous. Though I stand by that no guy deserves you, and my rule had good intentions behind it.”
My shoulders drop. “Okay, well, that ruins my speech.”
Bash chuckles. “I’m sorry. It did seem like it was going to be a good one.” His expression turns somber. “Can I ask you something?”
My anxiety flares up again. All of my emotions are pulling at my mind. Elation that Shepherd isn’t in trouble, residual anger at the idea that he could have been benched, and worry that I’ve messed up my relationship with Bash.
I nod.
“Shepherd said you were worried about disappointing me and that’s why you hid your relationship. Is that true?”
I look down. “You’ve done so much for me. You and MJ both took me in, and you gave me my apartment. I didn’t want to let you down in any way. I’ve been working so hard to make you proud, and when I found out about the no-dating-cheerleaders rule, I worried that I might ruin everything.”
“Jaz, look at me,” Bash says softly. I lift my head, wringing my hands. “There are no conditions or strings attached to your apartment. We gave you that because we love you. I’m happy you’re working hard, but do that for you, not for me or MJ.”
“I don’t want you to feel like you wasted your money.”
He crosses the space between us and gives me a hug. “You’re not an investment; you’re family.” He squeezes me for emphasis, then pulls back to look down at me. “Don’t you ever think that you need to pay me back or live up to some standard. All I want is for you to be happy and safe, okay?”
I nod, tears stinging the backs of my eyes.
Somehow, my family always knows exactly what I need to hear.
It might take me some time to truly believe his words, but this is the kickstart I needed.
And I’m grateful I have people in my life who care enough to remind me of the truth when the lies get loud.
“Okay,” I whisper and accept another hug from him.
“Also, I gave Shepherd my blessing, but if he breaks your heart, I reserve the right to bench him for the rest of his college career,” he says, and I let out a watery laugh.
“I’ll take that deal,” Shepherd says. I look over at him through blurry eyes. “I don’t plan on breaking her heart.”
I smile at him, then look at Bash again. “Thank you.”
“I’m always going to be here for you,” he tells me, then looks at Shepherd. “You too.”
Shepherd nods, gratitude written all over his expression.
Bash claps his hands together. “Now, if there are no other huge emotional speeches I need to listen to, I’m going to head home. Sundays are for pancakes, and I’m missing out.”
I giggle. “Give everyone my love.”
Shepherd walks over and takes my hand.
“I will. And I expect you both at the next family dinner. Anticipate a full interrogation,” Bash says with a pointed look.
“I’m looking forward to it,” Shepherd replies with an easy smile.
Bash chuckles. “You only say that because you don’t know what you’re in for.” He grabs a ball cap off his desk and puts it on, then picks up his keys and phone and drops them into the pockets of his athletic joggers.
“I’ll make sure he’s prepared,” I tell Bash on our way out of his office.
I swing my and Shepherd’s interlocked hands as we follow Bash down the photo-lined corridor. We step outside into the crisp autumn air, a breeze kicking up orange and brown leaves.
“I’ll see you both soon, if the family group chat is any indication.” Bash nods to us before setting off toward the parking lot behind the athletics building.
“You have a family group chat?” Shepherd asks.
“Yes, it’s chaotic on a normal day, but after news like this, I had to mute it because my phone was buzzing so much it fell off my vanity table,” I say with a laugh. “I don’t think you know what you’re getting into by dating me.”
He tugs me closer to him, settling his arms around my waist. I lift mine to drape around his neck, toying with the hair there. “I think your family is great. The way you care for them is one of the things I love most about you.”
My movements cease. I meet his indigo eyes. “Love?” I whisper.
His smile turns a little shy, but there’s a certainty in his gaze that makes my pulse speed up.
“Yes, love. I love you, Jasmine. I love the way your hair is always falling into your face, and how you cook to express all your big emotions. I love how you take care of your friends. I even love your insults when we’re playing chess. ”
I let out a little laugh at that, but it comes out choked because of the emotion in my throat.
“I can’t do anything without thinking about you, and I don’t want to spend a day apart from you either,” Shepherd continues. “I think I’ve been falling for you since the day I saw you playing Grayson in chess, and every interaction since then multiplied my feelings.”
I tug him down for a gentle kiss, pressing our foreheads together. “I love you too, Shepherd. I didn’t want to fall for you, but you made it impossible not to. You’re kind, thoughtful, and caring. You make me laugh and feel safe. Each time I see you, from the very first time, I get butterflies.”
I feel Shepherd smile against my lips before capturing them in a kiss. Everything settles in that moment. All of my anxiety over the future dissolves like salt in pasta water. There’s only me and Shepherd and the autumn breeze combing through my hair.
We break apart, and I smile when Shepherd brushes his nose against mine.
“What do you say to me taking you on a real date? No sneaking around necessary.”
“I would love that,” I breathe.
“I don’t think I want to go to a restaurant, though. You’ve ruined me for all food that isn’t made by you.”
I giggle. “I love you.”
He brushes his nose against mine again. “I love you too, Chef.”
“For the last time, I’m not a chef,” I groan.
He smiles as he whispers, “Yet.”