CHAPTER 52
ONE MONTH LATER
I haven’t seen him in a month, I barely left the room.
I can’t stand the thought of crossing his path.
Can’t bear to look at him. Abigail offered to try and fix my wings, constantly offering, knowing it caused me pain.
But as I watch her belly grow more and more each day, I couldn’t ask that of her, she was tired enough, just like me.
I feel exhaustion beyond anything I could imagine, the nights growing longer with every day that passes as I tossed and turned, trying to get comfortable, trying to forget everything that was Silas.
The bond truly is a curse and if I could make it end, I would have in my weakest moments.
But then, thinking of Matitus and Dragus and knowing how much it would hurt them if I did, I couldn’t bring myself to do it.
I couldn’t bring myself to give up my magic and save myself from the destruction that is Silas.
He was destruction, destroying everyone he meets.
We held funerals for the dead, I even asked Dragus to retrieve Silas’s father, I never went. The only one I went to was Marian’s. I still can’t believe she is dead; I am just glad she got to see the kingdom coming together before she died. Thankful to have been granted the memories of knowing her.
Matitus barely leaves my side and if he does, Dragus stays with me.
Memories of everything Silas has ever done haunts me.
I know Silas feels guilty, yet I can’t bring myself to forgive him, not this time.
How do you forgive someone that threatened to take your child away and throw you away like you mean nothing to them?
One day, I sit up when the doors open. Every Time they opened, I feel a twinge of fear and anxiety that it is Silas.
I sigh in relief as Matitus walk in, he was only gone for a few minutes, but it was long enough for my mind to scare me into thinking he was going to come and rip my baby from my womb.
That fear keeps Dragus awake at night. I can’t sleep knowing he could walk in at any time, Dragus can’t sleep because he can feel my fear of it, though he assures me Silas wouldn’t. Yet after everything, I wouldn’t put it past him to cut our baby from my womb and take it.
“I brought you some tea,” Matitus says, placing a cup down on the bedside table and helps me sit up. At this point, I only have a few weeks to go. My stomach bulges. The baby inside me grows more each day.
Matitus hands me the cup and lays beside me on the cramped bed.
Silas told them we could have the bedroom upstairs, but I refused, I didn’t expect them to stay with me, but they still did.
I know they are as uncomfortable as I am in this room.
But knowing Silas would be walking in and out randomly made me refuse the offer.
“We should go for a walk,” Matitus says, staring at the ceiling. I shake my head sitting against the headboard.
“Please love, I can’t keep sitting in this room doing nothing,” he says, rolling on his side and rubbing my huge belly. “I won’t let him touch you, he won’t even see you. He is doing stuff in the city, just one lap around the castle grounds,” he says.
I sip my tea. Going outside would be good, would help my magic heal me but the idea of going out there in the cold also didn’t seem to be all that appealing either. The baby sat atop my bladder, constantly giving me the urge to pee. Plus, the cold made everything worse.
“Where is Dragus?” I ask, changing the topic. He sighs, rolling back on his back while playing with a piece of my hair that fell on him, twirling it around his finger.
“He is with Pluto in the stables,” he answers.
“What is he doing in there?” I ask.
“Building a crib, well making one anyway,” he answers. I sigh. Building a crib for the baby I don’t get to keep, the baby he will take as soon as it’s born. “Don’t think like that Elora, I don’t think he will go through with it,” Matitus says.
“Well then you don’t know him, do you?” I retort. They think I am blinded to the hate I feel through the bond. He hates me, though I can tell he loves me. His hate is what he hangs onto, his hate is what will make him do it.
“We can go look at it, Dragus said it was nearly done,” he says looking up at me, hopeful.
“You’re sure he isn’t on the castle grounds?”
“Positive. Dakari is with him.”
“One lap then we come back,” I tell him. He nods, getting off the bed and pulling me up. Getting up from the bed is always the hardest. I look like an old lady swinging my legs trying to get up enough momentum to push my weight up.
“You should put something warm on, it’s cold out today,” he hands me my sweater. I tug it on over my head and it won’t go past my boobs. I huff while Matitus looks amused as I try pulling it off only to get stuck. He chuckles, pulling it off.
“Wait here I will go get one of mine,” he says, darting out of the room and closing the door. I waddle over to my slippers, sliding my feet in them just as Matitus returns with one of his hoodies. I chuck it on and follow him out the door. My heart races in my chest as I walk down the corridor.
“Calm down, he isn’t here, love,” he says, pulling on my hand gently toward the front door.
We stop at the doors, and I sit on the bench seat.
Matitus places some socks on my feet from the basket on the shelf above my head.
I then stuff my feet in my boots, trying to reach the laces.
Matitus does them up. Getting up, he opens the door, the light making me squint as I wait for my eyes to adjust to the brightness.
Not much light comes into the room. In the room, I feel like I am in my own little bubble, nestled away with just the fireplace and my books to keep me sane.
The air instantly makes me shiver as I walk down the few steps in front of it.
“Ah I need to pee, see exactly why this was a bad idea,” I tell him about to turn back around.
“Hold it, I know as soon as you go back in you will refuse to come back out,” he says tugging my hand.
I can see the city through the gates, the street directly in front the castle was hit the worst in the attack, but looking at it now, you would never have thought just a month ago it was destroyed.
Looking better than it ever has now with its fresh rooftops on the building and fresh paint, the signs on the businesses replaced with new ones.
“Dakari has been busy with Pluto and Dragus,” I state looking, through the gates.
“Mostly Silas and Dakari. Every morning, Silas hauls him out to do stuff, Abigail has been getting quite angry about it because he can never spend time with her,” Matitus tells me. I wondered why Abbie didn’t tell me herself.
“She didn’t want you to worry,” Matitus says answering my thoughts. “Come you should see the stables, Pluto cleaned them right up, he also caught and broke in three more,” he says excitedly tugging me toward them.
Matitus opens the huge doors to let me squeeze inside. The smell of hay and dirt hit my nose along with the smell of lacquered wood.
Matitus was right, there are more horses, all in their nice clean stalls.
I walk past a black one and find Pluto brushing it.
He looks up a smile gracing his face that now didn’t look so gaunt, his eyes no longer sunken into his face as he had gained weight and looked healthier than he had when I last saw him.
“My Queen,” he says, bowing his head.
“You don’t need to call me that,” I tell him. He shakes his head.
“You will always be my Queen. I will only take a knee for you,” he says.
Matitus’s hand touches the back of my neck making me look up and he nods toward the back. I follow him to find Dragus completely covered in sawdust, the ground coated in it as well, it was sticking in his hair, which has turned the same color.
He looks up as we enter and does a double take.
“You got her out of the room,” he says, smiling at Matitus and putting down some tools he has in his hand.
He goes to hug me but then stops, realizing he is coated in dust. Instead, he pecks my head and steps back. I look at the table he was working at, finding little wooden figurines. I pick one up. It looks like a fairy.
“What is this?” I ask, wondering why he is making fairy ornaments when I notice another three ornaments, but they are two Dragons and a Werewolf instead. They are incredibly detailed; they even have eyes and facial features, the Werewolf even has fur detail in it.
“Did you make all these?” I ask, looking up at him.
“I was making a mobile to hang above the cradle. Do you want to see it?” he asks excitedly.
I nod, following him over to the far wall.
He removes a sheet and I see a cradle. The top of the cradle has blossoms carved into the wood.
The sides, instead of straight wood, were twisted and carved like vines, just like my Fae marking that covered my side.
“You did all this by yourself?” I ask, shocked at the craftsmanship.
“You like it?” he asks, and I can tell now he was worried I didn’t.
“Love it, I just can’t believe you made it,” I tell him, running my fingers over the smooth wood.
“It should be finished in a few more days,” he says, covering it back over.
“I would hug you but you’re covered in dust,” I tell him, the particles in the air making me want to sneeze.
The doors open at the front of the stables making me look down toward the front. To my horror, Silas walks in with Dakari carrying tools. They had been chatting together, before going silent at the sight of me.
“You said he wouldn’t be here,” I tell Matitus, Silas starts walking toward us, the feeling through the bond of his made me nervous when I realize it isn’t my nerves but his.
He stops, staring down at me, his eyes trailing over my body stopping on my belly.
He steps forward and I step back away from him, and he drops his hand.
His jaw clenches before his eyes dart to mine.
“You look good,” he says but I look away, moving over to Dragus and away from him. “Elora,” he says.
“Save it Silas I don’t want to hear it, just leave please,” I tell him. His eyes flicker and he looks to Matitus, who nods toward the door. Silas looks back at me, turns on his heel and walks out. Matitus walks over, draping his arm over my shoulder. He kisses my head.
“He meant you no harm Lora.”
“I don’t care, I hate him,” I tell him. And I mean every word, how can they expect anything less after what he has done?
“I want to go back,” I tell them, walking toward the doors heading back to the castle.