Chapter Five Charlotte
CHAPTER FIVE
CHARLOTTE
H ayden walked out of earshot, leaving me to deal with checking in alone. He sounded worried, rattled even. It had to be about Gwen. He paced near the line of Christmas trees decorated in all reds and blues, and his shoulders were about up to his ears with tension. Exhaling, I tried to shake off the worry, and focus on the resort and getting our rooms.
“Everything alright?” Brendon asked.
“I’m sure. His parents are watching his daughter back home.” I forced a smile and leaned my forearms onto the counter. Christmas music played, and there was a holiday candle lit. Each breath was a hug to my soul. “This is so festive. What do you do the other eleven months of the year?”
“Other themes.” Brendon typed on the computer while maintaining eye contact with me. He was a bit much, but flirting was fun for me. Innocent enough. Plus it annoyed Hayden, and I didn’t care if I was immature. I enjoyed poking and rattling him. I had no endgame, not really, but that muscle in his cheek would twitch, and I found it sexy.
Plus I never quite forgave him for making me feel our chemistry was one-sided. Maybe my personal mission was to remind him he was wrong for the rest of my life.
“Yeah, what’s January?” I rested my chin on my wrist. Brendon’s eyes sparkled, and honestly, he’d be a fun one-night stand. His playful energy and broad shoulders were kryptonite to me. Not that one-night stands were my thing. I wished they were.
“Ice. Lots of blues and whites.” He reached into a drawer and pulled out magnetic cards. He swiped them on a machinelike thing and tucked them into a packet. “You are in room 100, Ms. Calhoun.”
“What about June? Or May, or August? They don’t have… well, shit. May has Memorial Day. What about the other two?”
Brendon adjusted his collar and seemed to stand taller. He took his decorating seriously, and I dug it. Anyone who loved something and was good at it was special in my book. The world was too harsh not to enjoy things. “June is summer, and August is back to school.”
“Makes sense.” I nodded, picturing rulers and notebooks and backpacks hanging everywhere.
“What was your friend’s name? Portobello? Peter?”
“Porter, but I prefer Portobello. That would be a great nickname.” I grinned, glancing over my shoulder at Hayden as he approached us. I tried to find evidence on his face to make sure Gwen was okay, but he remained stoic. Unreadable as usual. “All good?”
“Yeah. Gwen wanted to FaceTime.” He flashed a quick smile before putting his excessively large hand on my shoulder and squeezing. “You get us checked in?”
He’s touching me. Hayden is touching my shoulder. Alert the authorities.
“Uh,” I said, unable to form words because the warmth from his palm sent SOS signals to my loins. He had huge hands, and I swore I could feel the callouses through my sweater. First with touching my lower back, now this. It was Too Much. Damn, he had asked me a question. Something important. One I should definitely know the answer to but all I could focus on was his hand on me… and was he moving his thumb?
Hayden grazed his thumb over my collarbone. The little brush of naughtiness had my brain malfunctioning. What were words, even, really? Just combinations of letters that made sense to some people. Weird sounds that were a code?
“Ms. Calhoun?”
“Hi. Yes, that’s me.” I spun around, my face fire-engine red, and I blinked a lot. Like that would restart my brain.
Brendon smiled, and Hayden released his hold on me. Finally. Breathing became easy again, and I adjusted the hair at the base of my neck. “Did you check in Portobello here too?”
“Portobello?” Hayden asked.
“Inside joke,” I quipped, winking at Brendon. The handsome man laughed hard, and I felt kinda cool. “Anyhoodle, tell me he’s on the highest floor.”
“Ah, no. Mr. Porter is in room—” He paused, frowned even. “One oh two.”
“First floor. Great.” Hayden’s clipped tone made me glance at him. Maybe Gwen was sick or something.
“Where are you, Char?”
“One hundred.” I gulped, like having our rooms close together was dirty. Forbidden. Wrong. Did we have attaching doors? Oh my, what if we did? What if I sleepwalked naked into his room for him to turn me down, again? “They aren’t connected, right?”
“No. They aren’t.” Brendon smiled. “Let me know if you need anything, please, and I’ll let the on-site doctor know to expect you.”
“Yes, thank you. You’ve been the best.” I flashed my biggest grin at him before facing the hallway. A sign with an arrow showed rooms 70–150 to the right, along with the pool, and the bar. “How convenient for me.”
“What’s that?” Hayden asked. He hoisted the duffel bag onto his shoulder.
“The pool and the bar are near my room. It was a gift, really. With a little effort, I could never leave this wing of the resort, and wouldn’t that be fantastic?”
He snorted. “Pretty sure Christian has an agenda for us.”
“Don’t let my brother boss you around. Be your own person. Stick it to the man.” Even as I said the words, my stomach tightened with dread at the harsh reminder that it really was a man’s world. I talked a great talk, but could I walk the walk? My athletic director certainly didn’t think so. All the head coaches at our school were men, and they made it known they wanted to keep it that way. My shoulders slumped, and I lost a little bit of my bluster as we made our way down the hallway. I wasn’t giving in to their bullshit, but the reality of it was something I had to acknowledge.
This place was a perfect holiday hideout where I had no business stressing about my sexist, ageist boss. Greens and reds covered every free inch of wall space. Green lights, red ornaments, and wrapping paper in picture frames greeted us. I inhaled, the delicious scent of pine and cinnamon creating an intoxicating combination.
We passed a mirror, and my breath caught in my throat. We looked like a couple. It wouldn’t be a big deal, but seeing the reflection of us standing next to each other had my heart aching for something that would never happen. We weren’t heading to a shared room where I could peel off his shirt and lick his muscles until he whimpered. We weren’t going to fool around behind Christmas trees or make out in the hot tub. We definitely weren’t about to strip naked and fall onto the bed. I cleared my throat, my face overheating. My breaths came out in shallow gasps, and Hayden touched my shoulder.
“Am I walking too fast? I’m sorry. We can slow down.”
My face flushed even more. The guy of my daydreams thought I was winded from walking. “No, we could walk faster! Yes, let’s do that.”
I wanted space, a moment away from his gorgeous eyes and gentle demeanor. Hayden was so in control on the field and with his daughter. The one time he wasn’t, he kissed me before crushing my soul. Before I did anything stupid, I picked up my pace until we arrived at our doors. “Ah, home. Yes. Mama wants to see.”
Hayden shuffled next to me, but I refused to look at him. Call me a coward, but his nearness made my senses work overtime. That happened when you had secretly loved someone for ten years, told them one night after they kissed you, and then avoided them at all costs because of the humiliation.
When I let my deepest, most secret thoughts come out from the cave in the back of my mind, I always asked myself the same question. If I had the chance to be with Hayden, would I?
The answer was always the same: Hell yes .
Even if I knew it’d end in heartbreak, because despite trying to date other guys, no one came close to the spark I felt with Hayden. Without trying, he ruined me for other men. His kind soul, the way he loved his daughter and parents, the little things he did that made such a difference. He set the bar high, and I refused to lower my expectations. Even if it made me single as a Pringle forever, I was waiting for someone to be better than Hayden.
Sliding the card into the slot, I pushed open my door and was met with a roaring fireplace and the smell of gingerbread cookies. “This is heaven.”
Hayden coughed before brushing past me. He dropped my bag on the floor, and without a glance at me, he marched out. “Let me put my stuff in my room before going to the on-site doctor.”
I don’t want to go to the doctor when I have this waiting for me. A cozy oasis! A comfy corner! A Christmas cuddle zone!
“Yeah, you need to get checked out. Pretty sure you have a concussion.” Hayden faced me, his gorgeous smile on display. “What, pray tell, is a Christmas cuddle zone?”
“I didn’t realize I’d said it out loud.” I rubbed the center of my forehead. Sighing, I stood to my full height and plastered on my best fake smile. “Thanks for your help. I plan to remain in this snow globe room until Christian drags me out with cash bribes.”
His jaw clenched before he stepped closer. “You’re seeing a doctor.”
“I feel fine, Hayden.”
“Stop being an idiot,” he bit out. The wrinkle had returned between his eyes, and he dragged a thumb over one of his eyebrows, something he did when stressed. “That came out harsher than I intended.”
“Clearly.” I placed my hands on my hips as a bout of dizziness hit me.
“Char—” Hayden reached out and gently gripped my elbow, his large fingers rubbing circles over my sweater. “You have two choices. Either I carry you to the doctor, or you walk with me.”
Something about his statement reminded me of how he spoke to Gwen. The soft voice, the either/or option I’d witnessed him using. You have two choices, Gwen, the red or the blue cup. “Are you being a daddy to me right now?”
Something flashed in his eyes. “You’re not leaving me a choice when you’re acting this stubborn.”
The grip on my elbow tightened as he pulled me gently toward him. Our chests were two inches apart, and I forgot how to use my lungs, even though their sole purpose was to breathe in oxygen. We were so close. Oh my goodness.
His breath hit my face, and the base of my neck throbbed with my pulse. He’s touching me. He tilted my chin up, his gray gaze moving from my eyes to my mouth and then to my forehead. “You have a bruise, right here.” His fingertips grazed my forehead, sending goose bumps down my spine.
“And a lump, Charlotte.” He sighed, pressing his lips together as his gaze darkened. “When you got out of your car, with blood on your forehead and face, my heart stopped for a second. I need to make sure you’re okay. I’ll do whatever you want after, just… stop being so stubborn.”
His voice was rougher, deeper than I was used to.
“You make me sound ridiculous. I was always going to go.”
His lips quirked as he narrowed his eyes. “Mm, sure.”
“I was.” I poked him in his chest and immediately pulled back my finger. He was rock hard and warm.
“You choose the second option then?”
“The one where you walk me to the doctor?” I stepped out of his reach and felt the absence of his warmth. How annoying, my personal fantasy was also a furnace. Just yet another reason we’d be perfect together, because I was always cold. It was unfair. Maybe it was the accident, or the fact that he had touched my chin, but I decided, in that moment, that I wanted to play with fire, see if I could find any evidence that he viewed me as more than Christian’s sister. “I actually want the first option.” I put my arm to my forehead. “I’m feeling faint. Not sure I can walk. Please, be my daddy.”
The second those words left my mouth, the temperature in the room skyrocketed. Hayden’s gray eyes burned like charcoal, his breathing quickened, and his jaw tightened, but in a different way than I was used to. This wasn’t an annoyed look, it was interest. Heat.
He remained a statue, unmoving, but his eyes told me enough.
We were in a stare down, a war where I wasn’t sure what the winner won or the loser lost. I never thought I’d get a reaction, and now I didn’t know what to do with it. Was it the use of daddy to rile him up? Words escaped me, which had happened three times in my entire life. This being the third.
I arched a brow, daring him to make the first move, to say anything. Ten, twenty seconds went by before he ran a finger over his eyebrow.
“Charlotte,” he said, his voice deeper than I’d ever heard. He cleared his throat. “If you need me to carry you, I certainty can.”
Before I could respond, a knock pounded at the door. I jumped, my heart bursting out of my chest at the interruption.
“Knock, knock! Let us in, Charmander!” Christian’s voice boomed through the wood. “We have ice, medicine, and whiskey.”
“I’m good at massages too,” Garrett said.
Whatever moment, if one could even call it that, between Hayden and me evaporated like boiling water in a blizzard. Poof. Gone. Burst. His expression hardened and went back to indifference, like he didn’t care if I was a goat or a pizza or me.
“Do you give forehead massages?” I asked, teasing Garrett as I opened the door.
“I’m a forehead virgin, but I can still make you feel good.”
“Shut the fuck up, Garrett.” Christian shoved his friend in the shoulder before coming into my hotel room. Penny and Garrett followed, and for the first time since I got in my car that morning, I relaxed and was happy to be here.
These were some of my favorite people in the world, and yes, they preferred a sport I hated, but this trip would be fun. A nice reprieve from my lack of love life and battle against the boys’ club at work.
Christian pulled me into a hug, his grip harder than normal before he looked down at me. “Gross. I’m gonna have to photoshop this egg out of all the photos.”
“Christian, don’t be an asshole.” Penny came up and pulled me from his arms. “Let me have a look.” She frowned and clicked her tongue. “Come on, sis. Let’s leave the guys and go check the doctor. We’re not doing a damn thing until we make sure you’re okay.”
As Penny dragged me to the door, I spared a glance at Hayden over my shoulder. His gaze was on me, his eyes unreadable. No trace of the brief moment we had. No sign of a truce between us. But when Penny looped her arm in mine, a different feeling warmed me. I might never get a chance with Hayden, but I had an incredible friend group around me. My brother and his fiancée were more best friends than family, and Garrett would lend anyone the shirt off his back. Would he flex and show off his muscles? For sure, but he’d do anything for anyone he cared about. I would focus on those people and not the guy who broke my heart.