Chapter 12
12
SIX WEEKS LATER….
I stood in the small bathroom inside my father’s study and mentally prepared myself for the meeting. Everyone expected me to assume my role as head of the family. People were counting on me to lead, but they didn’t know what I’d been through. It seemed as though everyone had already moved on from the events that happened, and I wondered why I couldn’t.
I hadn’t even thought about taking the reins since my captivity, and after the torture I? endured, I didn’t know if I was worthy. How could I protect my people if I couldn’t protect myself? A heavy sadness weighed on my heart, and it wouldn’t go away. Accompanied with the stabbing pain in my abdomen I suffered for most of the morning, I just wanted to crawl into bed alone to deal with it. It started in my core and seemed to be spreading, like knives cutting into me, and I started to think I may have caught something from one of my rapists.
I think I’d done a good job of pretending I was okay. I knew that above all else, they needed a leader who could rise above, taking the negative and spinning it into a positive .
Nicole's words echoed in my head. Women in this world are forced to make sacrifices for the sake of the family…
How could I do that if I felt dead inside? Entombed within myself, allowing thoughts of what was done to me to run rampant in my head and torture me mentally.
I took a deep breath and straightened, ignoring the pain that wrapped around my body attacking my lower back.
Time to fake it again… Joining everyone in my father’s study— my study. As the door clicked shut behind me, I could audibly hear everyone’s heads turn to stare at me.
Most of the men in the room were survivors of Walker's attack, but there were a few new ones that Thomas and Arthur swore were trustworthy. They probably didn’t know what had happened or had heard whispered rumors about it and wanted the truth which I wouldn’t give.
The sight of them spoke to my anxiety and I began shaking, rubbing my sweaty palms on my skirt every so often. Taking a few steps forward I found I couldn’t go any further. My legs wouldn't allow me to continue, so I'd have to speak to my people from a distance. I glanced at Thomas, and his face held a look of understanding. I hoped others felt the same and knew I was trying my best.
“First off, thank you to those who remained loyal and helped with cleanup.”
Somebody had to dispose of the bodies and replace the furniture, broken windows, and bullet-riddled wallpaper. I could hear the nervousness laced within my voice, and the longer I stood there, the more pronounced my shaking became. I swallowed past the lump in my throat and kept going.
“The real reason for this meeting is to discuss a plan going forward. Due to recent…events, we’re going to have to plan and calculate how to hit them harder, where it hurts; like they did to us. We need to show them their mediocre attempt at a takeover did not phase us. We need to show them what happens when they mess with the Bennetts. Every Walker head on a spike lined along the walkway of this house. They wanted a war gentlemen. They have one.”
Thomas and Arthur smiled proudly as they stood up and flanked me, facing the room. Their presence and unspoken loyalty gave me courage to continue speaking. I smiled at the brothers, grateful that they supported me, and a man stood up approaching me with a vase in his hands.
“Miss. Bennett, this is for you,” and he handed it to me.
I turned it over in my hands and gasped, realizing it was an urn. I gazed at the man in confusion. “What is this?”
He looked uncomfortable. “It’s your father. I was tasked with taking care of him,” he said.
I studied him in all his embarrassment. I had the feeling that he truly meant well. I held out my hand to him and he took it.
“Thank you for helping,” I said. He nodded and returned to his seat. Sadly, my father’s wishes were unknown to me, I never got the chance to ask.
I set the urn gently on my desk and turned to Thomas and Arthur. “We’ve already deployed a few men to infiltrate and attempt to take them down from the inside. They will bring us intel and we will use those findings to our advantage. For safety, those involved will not be named, but you know who you are.”
I turned to face Thomas. “Could you take over researching?” I paused briefly, raising my eyebrows. “How to better invest our assets. I’ve heard the creative scene is lovely this time of year. You can hire a team of those you trust to scout out charity events and things like that.”
Thomas nodded, but I saw the skepticism in his eyes. I ignored it and moved on.
“Arthur, I need you to put together a separate team that will infiltrate Walker’s auctions. You’re solely tasked with rescuing men and women from being sold into slavery. We need to put an end to this as soon as possible.”
It felt as though lightning shot through my abdomen, and I grabbed it, a small gasp left my lips and I gripped hard onto the edge of the table, but it didn’t go unnoticed as Roe eyed me, silently asking if I was okay. I smiled his way and continued.
Arthur nodded curtly, keeping his eyes forward. I got the sense that he and Thomas were trying to show the new boys how one should act during meetings, and I commended them for it. The last thing I needed was for some unknown person to stand up and cause a problem.
As if on cue, a man stood up. “Excuse me, but I have a question,” he said, his tone apologetic.
I turned to him and nodded, waiting for him to speak.
“Your plan for them is fine and all, but don’t you think we should be hitting them harder? More out in the open? I mean, they overtook your home, killed your father, tortured you. Everything points toward giving them a taste of their own medicine. If we hit them as hard as they hit us physically, then maybe we can win this thing.”
“You’re new, right?” I asked, and he nodded. “You don’t know how this works yet, but we do not stoop to their level. The things they do are sick and twisted, and that is not the Bennett way. We will win this in our own way.”
“But how many more people have to die? I just think some people could see you as a cowardly leader if everything is done behind the scenes,” he countered, pushing back.
I didn’t know what to say. He was right. I was a coward. The people who hurt me were already dead, and so was my father, but I knew what he would say .
Do what you think is right…
Pain twisted my features as another cramp swept through me, then I felt a rush of liquid . Shit, I need to end this soon and go lie down. I started feeling clammy and feverish.
Before I could speak, I caught movement out of the corner of my eye glancing at Rowan, who’s chair squeaked against the floor as he slowly rose from his seat.
My mouth opened, ready to ask if he was okay, and closed quickly. Rowan had his hand entangled in the man’s hair and was dragging him to the center of the room.
“Rowan” I warned, but he ignored me.
He slammed his fist into the man’s face, and he cried out.
“Stop!” But he kept going, almost blindly, taking his rage out on the poor kid.
“Rowan, stop!” I shouted, and this time he hesitated, his bloody fist hovered over the kid's face, shaking under his restraint. I hurried to him and pulled him into a standing position.
“It was an honest assumption, Roe. There's no danger. Stand down,” I commanded.
The rage in his eyes intensified, and he tore himself from me leaving the room. I knew that he was protecting me, and that he would always keep me safe. But he needed to understand that not everybody who opposed me was going to hurt me, it’s okay to have a difference of opinion…right? I watched him walk away with a sad longing welling within me, and I wanted to embrace him as I’d done in the past.
I stared apologetically at the man who lay on the floor clutching his nose. Helping him to his feet.
“Go get that checked out. I’m sorry for that,” I said softly, and pushed him gently toward the door. “As for the rest of you, you’re dismissed.”
The room remained silent except for the shuffle of feet as everyone walked sullenly out the door. Thomas and Arthur hung back, and I motioned for Thomas to come to me as his brother walked out the door with a sigh. Nothing was right, and everyone felt it.
“That was intense,” Thomas remarked, with a raised brow.
“Yeah, it was,” I responded drily. “Can you help me with him? I don’t think he’s coping well, and I’d hate to see him revert to his old habits, if you know what I mean.”
Thomas nodded fervently. “Of course I can help him. I helped him once before. The only thing is, you might not like my methods, if it comes to that.”
I knew what that meant, sort of. But it would have to be a sacrifice to be made if it came to it. I couldn’t let him fall prey to his habit again. No matter what was going on in my own mind, his safety and health was important and I still loved him.
“Do what you have to keep him with me,” I said with a smile, squeezing his shoulder in thanks.
“I will. And you should go take care of yourself.” He said awkwardly.
I followed his eyes and saw that blood had started leaking down my leg onto the floor, and the pulsing of my uterus continued painfully. First, I was going to shower, then stuff my face because I’m starving. Only after would I go back to planning, making sure I kept Rowan busy too.
I leaned against the counter and gripped tightly to my glass of water. My mouth had been dry all morning, and I gritted my teeth against the pain I was in, it was beginning to irritate me. My mind raced as memory after memory bombarded me, keeping me docile and contained when I should have been planning, keeping the family together and in check, and showing the Walkers who they messed with.
Nicole peeked her head in, and when she saw me, she approached cautiously. By the look of relief on her face, I could tell she’d been looking for me.
“Charlotte,” she said, keeping her voice soft. “You don’t look so good.”
“I’m fine.” I said curtly.
I’d begun to think that everyone was tiptoeing around me and walking on eggshells, and I was becoming frustrated, it was just another thing I’d have to pretend didn’t bother me.
To be honest, I didn’t care about any of it anymore. I just wanted to disappear and never be seen again. I wanted out, but I felt trapped as I always had, except this time I didn’t have my father to talk me out of it or Rowan to help me escape from it.
She opened her mouth to speak when Arthur walked through the kitchen and winked at her. She blushed, and I saw the look in her eyes; she was smitten. I smiled at her knowingly.
“You and Arthur, huh?” I asked with a giggle, teasing her as she’d teased me before. “He doesn't know the first thing about relationships, Nikki.”
It was, admittedly, the first time I’d smiled genuinely since being held captive, and Nikki’s face gave away her shock at the smile.
“Shut up,” she blushed, casting her eyes down in embarrassment. “Who said I was looking for one?”