Chapter 17
17
ROWAN
T aking her on this small trip was a great idea, even if it was only for a few days. It was almost as if the silence of nature had recharged Charlotte. As I sat under my favorite tree that gave me just the right amount of shade, allowing a comfortable breeze, I watched her hand move swiftly along the canvas. The tree was riddled with bullet holes, but she got it, and it eased my mind just a bit.
My eyes wandered up her legs and a smile spread across my face as I took a mental picture of her painting in my shirt. She didn’t leave a lot to the imagination as it fell open only buttoned at her midsection. Things had been difficult, and I knew that she felt like I shouldn’t love her, but what happened to her was in no way her fault. I could never think less of her, even if I missed who she used to be.
She was no longer the happy, carefree, angelic-looking woman with a temper to match her humor. Instead, she was a ghost of a woman, but somehow it made her that much more beautiful, and it irked me that I couldn’t even be that mad about it. The most positive aspect being that she was slowly taking small steps to care for herself again and I fully support her timeline. Whatever she needs.
Standing up slowly, I walked over to her and gasped as I gazed down at the perfect rendition of myself leaning up against the tree, looking out at the crystal-clear water.
“Charlotte, it’s amazing, really,” I said, leaning down and kissing her hair softly.
She turned to face me and I couldn’t help but stare into her eyes as the sun’s reflection cast a beautiful glint in them.
“Roe, I don’t think I’ll ever be able to forgive myself for making you take off that day. It’s my fault we were hurt. I…I can’t…” she took a shuddering breath. “I thought you were dead, and I was giving up. Really terrible things are happening in my head, especially at night when the world is quiet. I thought my mind was wired differently before but this…This is something entirely different.”
Walker's voice briefly echoed through my head.
What happens to her….is your fault… I stayed quiet and kneeled down, holding her in my arms …she’s just another number thanks to you… I held her until she was ready to continue.
“I hear my father calling me weak; I hear Nikki blaming me for Jason being gone. I…I hear you asking me how you could love someone like me, someone so used…it’s scary inside my head and I just need it to stop. Please help me. I don’t want to die, but I can’t live like this,” she whispered as the waterfall of tears started to cascade in a steady stream down her face.
Tears pricked my eyes as her words tumbled out. Hearing her say these things broke me. I feel like I failed her, but I’m going to make it right… .
I clambered stiffly to my feet and offered my hand to her. She took it gently and let me pull her up and I placed my fingers under her chin tilting her head up to face mine. The punishment that Richard referred to was this…the aftermath. At least, that’s how it felt.
“Lottie…I can’t help you with the war in your head, and I am so sorry. But what I can do is be the man you need. You have my full support, an ear to listen, and a shoulder to cry on. I promise to love you even on your worst days and be as patient as I can be. If I would have known that you were crying right next to me while I slept, I wouldn’t have. I’ll stay up all night with you if that’s what it takes. I told you once before that I’d be anything you need me to be.”
I stopped suddenly as an idea crossed my mind, and a mischievous smile crossed my face as I wiped her tears away. I reached behind me and picked up the purple paint. “And that’s exactly what I’m going to do.”
Almost as if she could read my mind, she took a step back. “Please, no. Rowan,” she scolded, giggling.
Before she could run, I poured the cold thick liquid over her, and I watched as it made its way through her hair and over her neck, into her cleavage. The paint washed over her body as though she was a piece of art herself.
“Rowan! What are you doing? This is your shirt,” she laughed.
I didn’t give a shit if it was my shirt. I could buy a new one. But this—her smile, her laugh?meeting her eyes again— this was priceless. Dipping my thumb into the paint, I ran it across her forehead, down her nose, and across her pouting lips.
“I don’t give a fuck about my shirt, Charlotte.” I chuckled darkly. “Can I touch you?” She nodded her consent, and I imagined she was the canvas as my fingers grazed along her abdomen, up to her chest underneath my now-purple shirt.
I pushed it over her shoulders before leaning in to capture her lips softly in mine. Slowly, I moved my tongue along her jawline. It tasted like acrylic paint, but I still found myself wanting more. Leaning in close, my hand drifted lower, taking her breast in my hand. My thumb grazed her nipple and a gasp left her lips.
“Tell me at any point if I need to stop. I need you to guide me,” I said. She moaned as my lips found their way to her neck, sucking sensually.
Before I knew it, a shiver ran down my spine as red paint ran down my shoulders and onto my chest. I laughed, my hot breath causing goosebumps to rise on the skin of her neck. But I stayed quiet, watching, and feeling her soft movements in admiration. I could feel her slowly coming back to me and it made my heart swell. We still had a long road ahead; both of us did. But just then, we were two normal people enjoying each other’s company, just like when we were younger.
When she was satisfied, she motioned for me to open my shirt before she picked up her brush and used it to make swirls all over my chest.
“I need an ear, okay? If I tell you some things, we have a fire tonight. Deal? If I have to face myself and accept it, it’s only fair that you do, too,” I nodded as she continued.
I would do whatever she asked. She was finally opening up to me and it was all I could ask for. It was all I wanted.
The paint was thick on my body, although with every stroke of the brush, shivers ran down my spine.
“Lacey hurt me, Roe. She’s the one who branded me; she held it there and made me watch as it changed from red to black. She forced me to come. She said she was going to use you in ways that should only be done…by me.”
I was trying to stay calm and relaxed, but with every word she spoke, I couldn’t help but clench my jaw tighter. That’s why she sounded like that…
Charlotte ran the brush across my abdomen and I looked down at her.
“It wasn’t just Walker who raped me. After he showed me the video of you, chained up and whimpering. I was forced to come with two cocks inside of me and a vibrator assaulting my clit. He was trying to coerce me into giving up my place at the head of the family. I still have nightmares about it. Sometimes I’ll just be going about my day, and I’ll smell something that triggers the memory of him touching me.”
Charlotte stepped back and circled around me,?grabbing at my shirt to bring it over my shoulders, revealing my own scars, and I blew out a breath as her fingers traced over?them. I shouldn’t be getting aroused, but everything about her, what she was doing turned me on. Her sultry, dangerous voice, her fingers tracing, and her lips touching the parts of myself I hated. It was my own kind of sensory deprivation, seeing, feeling, listening to her like this, something I’d been deprived of for so long.
She continued in a monotone voice. “I was drugged most of the time in captivity. I knew it wasn’t right and I didn’t want it, but my body betrayed me. It wanted the abuse.”
I swallowed hard and turned my head to watch her movements as my own anxiety rose at the way each of her slender fingers traced the outline of my healed welts.
“No more covering these up with tattoos, Roe,” she said seductively. “They are a part of you, embrace them.”
A guttural moan forced its way out of my mouth as I felt the wetness of her tongue glide across each one, a kiss to the same needy spot following.
“Lottie,” I groaned as her paint-filled hands wrapped around my torso, her slick fingers threatening to dip beneath the waistline of my jeans.
“I’m sorry I couldn’t protect you,” I whispered, grabbing her hand and urging it lower, letting it rub against me. I wanted her to know that I wanted this as much as she did.
“Shh. I was abused in ways I never thought I could be. They called me names and recorded me, made me watch every time I was taken by one of them. Electricity ran through my veins every time those fuckers shocked me.”
She released my cock from the confines of my pants, and gently stroked, calling it to her attention.
“Do you know why I wanted you to fuck me that night, Rowan?”
My eyes widened as she walked around me, trailing her red-coated finger along my heated skin, removed the elastic from around her wrist and placed her hair in a ponytail before lowering to her knees.
“Because seeing your anger boil over, seeing how far you were willing to go for me, aroused me. The way you kissed my neck as you pulled at the collar…”
I knew what she wanted, and it was becoming harder for me to control myself. I sensed that she needed to continue to lead, and I wouldn’t take that from her. A moan left my lips when her tongue licked up the length of my dick and twirled around the tip.
“The revenge in your eyes as you gutted that man for me…”
Looking up at me through her eyelashes, full of need and desire, she gave me a command I was in no place to defy.
“Use my mouth, Rowan. Make me take it like a good girl.”
I tapped my thigh twice, signaling what she needed to do if she wanted me to stop, and she nodded her understanding.
“Fuck, please forgive me for what I’m about to do, Princess,” I moaned threading my fingers through her hair, gripping her ponytail tight.
With a groan, I pushed my cock into her mouth until it hit the back of her throat. She relaxed, gagging slightly as it slid further down, sucking me in like she was starving for it.
Using my hand to hold her head in place, I fucked her face hard until it was red, and my balls rested against her chin
“Hollow out your cheeks for me,” I commanded, holding her head in place. “I know you can take all of it, Lottie.”
Her eyes watered, and she moaned around me as saliva collected and spilled out of her mouth and down her chest. The sight of her taking me so well had me feral.
“Just like that.”
She hummed around my dick as her tongue flicked out along my shaft and I pulled her back, looking her in the eyes, with a need I didn’t know I had.
“Fuck, Princess. I’ve missed this. You look so pretty right now, taking me so well.”
I drove into her and held her there until her throat pulsed around me and she tapped my thigh.
“We both know you can be louder; I want to hear you gag around me.”
I waited for her to catch a breath and nod before I slid back into her mouth. Her hands clutched the back of my thighs and pulled me deeper, her throat bulging as I pushed in and slid out of her mouth rhythmically.
Her body was shaking with pleasure, and I wanted to come so I could please her, too.
“Don’t move, I’m close.” Her hot wet mouth drove me over the edge.
With a groan, I gave one final thrust into her mouth and released myself, shooting hot ropes of cum down her throat.
My sensitivity was heightened, but she didn’t stop.
“Keep going, fuck…take it all.” I whimpered.
She kept moving her lips around me until I was completely drained. My hands shook at the overstimulation I was feeling, but I chalked it up to how arousing it was when she took control; even if it wasn’t often.. As I fell from her mouth, my primal urges overcame me, and I wanted her now.
I kicked my pants off the rest of the way and picked her up, walking toward the cabin.
“I’ll give you what you want as long as my request from earlier doesn’t go ignored,” I growled, kicking the door shut behind me.
Charlotte
He stared me straight in the eyes as we neared the bedroom, the primal look in his eye sending shivers down my spine.
“Are you sure?” he asked, pushing through his sexual urges.
“Please, I need you,” I breathed, grinding against him and running my nails down his back. “Show me how much you love me.”
He shoved me back until I was pressed against the door, my legs remaining locked around his waist. The sudden jolt rattled me, though it didn’t hurt. He held me there with his body pressed against mine. We were sweaty and covered in paint, but I didn't care. I wanted his fear to drive him right into the bedroom, and hoped he wouldn’t hold back.
Rowan swallowed, never losing my gaze as he stared me down with darkened eyes.
“I killed Lacey,” he said slowly as a smirk creeped across his face.
I couldn’t breathe.
“What?” I said quietly. I hadn’t known that. I was under the impression that she’d escaped. He nodded.
I didn’t know what to say, so I wrapped my arms around his neck and kissed him deeply. His body tensed as he kissed me back, and my desire was making my head spin. I could feel his hands on my ass, squeezing me as he held me in place.
My body burned with need and I was aroused at the thought of him doing these things. Maybe I should have been ashamed for it, but I wasn’t. His smile at that moment was less menacing and more closely resembled the man I knew, the one who loved me. He hadn’t killed Lacey and those men for nothing, he had done it for me.
“Tell me…” I began breathlessly as he laid me down on the bed, towering over me. “What else have you done for me?”
“I let Jason go because it would hurt Nicole if I killed him, and if she’s hurt, so are you.”
I didn’t know that either. I thought he would have killed Jace for what he did. I’d imagine it?took a lot of self-control for him to do that.
“Tell me more,” I panted as I reached into my makeup bag on the nightstand and pulled out my vibrator.
“Once I knew you were okay, I tortured and killed Richard Walker,” he groaned, kissing down my body, leaving a trail of fire in its wake, his tongue tracing over every newly placed scar.
I placed the vibrator against my clit and moaned as the buzzing awakened me further.
“More…”
My voice came out breathless and Roe looked at me with a dangerous grin before taking my nipple in his mouth, biting down softly before licking the pain away as his fingers trailed down my body, pausing for a moment before they entered me.
“I put the mask on him and smashed the dial.” He killed a man for me. “I watched the light leave his eyes as he slowly suffocated.”
He didn’t just kill him, he tortured him… All to protect me.
I felt safer knowing that. I gasped as he used his missing finger to his advantage, carefully forming a fist and lining it up with my opening, testing whether it would be difficult or not.
“Turn it up, Princess,” he ordered, spitting on my stretched core, allowing more lubrication for his fist to move inside of me with ease.
“Take my fist like I know you can.”
I took a deep breath as two of his fingers entered me with ease, and once he entered a third, I cried out.
“Stay still for me Princess,” he said as he eased the rest of his hand inside of me, stretching me in ways he never had. I feel so full.
His thrusts became more forceful, and it felt as though his fingers brushed against my cervix each time he withdrew his hand and drove it back inside of me. It was a strange feeling, new and erotic, and it turned me on. Coupled with the feeling of the vibrator against my clit, I could feel myself becoming sensitive as I neared orgasm. He created a sweet rhythm as he continued to thrust in and out, twisting his fist around inside of me. It's quite an uneven pleasure, and I moaned through the pain.
“You’re so fucking tight, Lottie…Fuck. Your pussy is swallowing my hand” I could see my arousal on his arm, and my eyes rolled back seeing it disappear back into my aching cunt. I arched my back, allowing my hips to meet the thrust of his fist as he repeatedly buried it deep inside me.
“Fuck! Right there! More, please, Rowan!” I cried as I clenched tightly around his hand and I gave it everything I had, letting go of control and screaming out. “I’m coming.”
“Good fucking girl, squirt for me. I’m going to hunt them all down for you, Charlotte,” he growled, pulling the waterfall of juices from me. I whimpered at the new and intense pleasure as my orgasm ricocheted through my body.
Once he removed his hand,?I grabbed onto his arm and pulled him to me, bringing his lips to mine. He moved them quickly and hard over mine, sucking on my bottom lip and pulling it between his teeth before his fingers slithered around my neck and clamped down.
“And I’m going to kill them all.”
He groaned in pleasure as I wrapped my legs around him and placed the vibrator next to me before wrapping him in a tight embrace.
“You’re the devil, Rowan Anderson,” I said breathlessly as his eyes met mine with a mischievous glint.
He lowered his face to my ear and began to speak, squeezing the sides of my neck harder. I could feel the blood in my veins pulse against my throat as he slowly released pressure before squeezing again.
“Tell me you want me to fuck this wet cunt,” he commanded.
I shook my head, intending to tease him as I bit down on my lip and smiled. He cocked an eyebrow at me and then shrugged before picking up the vibrator. He switched it back on and pressed it against my sensitive clit, and I gasped.
“Tell me to fuck you,” he whispered. “Now.”
Again, I disobeyed and a sly grin spread across my face. I loved how intense it was with him, even more than it was before. He chuckled and shook his head before turning the intensity higher on the vibrator. I took a deep breath as I moaned my pleasure, and he took the chance to hook his thumb into my mouth forcing it open, and spit into it before sucking at the skin on my neck.
I moaned louder, the sounds encouraging him to continue.
“Swallow it, Charlotte.”
I obeyed and he pulled back, smiling at me, watching with satisfaction as I squirmed for him. I turned my focus on the feelings that coursed through me as the vibrator buzzed against my clit. I wanted release but knowing that I wouldn’t get it until he got what he wanted drove me once again to disobey.
“Are you going to come, pretty girl?” he smirked.
I shook my head. My orgasm was sneaking closer and closer with every jerk of his hand, and I attempted to close my legs.
He brought a harsh slap to my thigh and pried them back open. “You’re not being a good girl, Princess. And only good girls get to come,” he laughed.
I couldn’t hold on much longer, and my hips started rubbing against the toy feverishly, a frustrated groan leaving my lips every time he pulled away to prevent me from releasing. Then just as I was about to fall over the edge, he removed the vibrator completely. I groaned my frustration and rocked my hips, searching for release as my swollen clit throbbed with disappointment.
“The only way you’re going to come is if I allow you to,” he told me. And our eyes locked. “Beg Charlotte.”
I knew I wanted it. I wanted him buried inside of me, the need to feel every hard inch of him as he fucked me outweighing anything else.
“Fuck me, Rowan. Please take care of me.”
He brought his lips to mine again, softer this time. Slow and sensual, and the vibrator returned to my clit. I could feel his hard cock pressing against me, and I began grinding on the toy, pulling him closer. He laughed as I tried to line him up with my entrance, giving myself the relief I desperately wanted.
“Don’t worry, Princess. I’ll take care of you,” he moaned as he entered me.
He moved slowly, inch by inch, taking a minute in between each movement for me to adjust and make sure that I was still okay. I grasped his shoulders as his thrusts slowed, and the grinding against my clit intensified.
“Rowan,” I gasped, and he gave me a hard thrust. He quickly pulled out of me only to fill me once more.
“Say my name again. Shit…I need it…Please.”
“Roe—” I began. A tear fell from my eye. All the sensations were overwhelming, being that connected to him again and to feel completely loved by him. He gave me the perfect balance of love, and the roughness I sought.
He slowed; not by much, enough to bring me down from my growing high.
“Are you alright?” he asked, kissing my cheek.
He towered over me, and then he bent down and took my lips with his, kissing me hard as he thrust to that sweet rhythm again.
“More than okay. Please don’t stop,” I begged, breathing heavily.
“I love you. Come with me, baby; I can wait for you” he whispered as he grabbed my chin. “Keep your eyes on me.”
I placed my forehead against his, our hot breath mingling between us as we reached our climax together.
As I relaxed into my post-orgasm state, Rowan went into the bathroom and came back with towels. He used one to wipe off some of the paint before collapsing next to me.
He took a few heaving breaths before pulling me into his arms.
“No one will ever hurt you again; they have no idea what's coming,” he murmured in my ear. “Let’s relax and clean up…then we can have that fire.”
I believed him.