Chapter 25
25
ROWAN
I took my helmet off and stood stiffly at the end of the driveway, staring blankly at the space where my childhood home used to stand. All that remained was a pile of burned rubble and thick ash coated everything. I’m not sure what I expected to gain from going there, but all that came to me was deep sadness. My whole childhood, buried.
A sad-looking singed tree stood stoically in the front yard. It would never grow again, but memories of my mother laughing as I swung in the tire swing bombarded me. I clenched my jaw, trying to keep the tears at bay.
In the span of a few months, I’d lost my home and all of the memories that came with it, I lost the only good friendship I’d ever had, and I’d lost the love of my life. I didn’t have much to live for anymore, and I seriously began contemplating taking off and starting over somewhere new and strange, somewhere where nobody knew who I was.
“Hey!” a voice shouted from somewhere nearby, ripping me out of my reverie.
I turned toward the sound and spotted one of my neighbors approaching. I smiled, glad to see a friendly face.
“Hey. How’s it going?” I asked.
“It’s alright. I’m glad to see you’re alright after what happened here. I’m sad to know I’ll never see that lovely home again,” the old woman gazed at the wreckage with raw emotion on her face.
“Me, too,” I said, glancing back at the ruins.
“This is for you,” she responded, holding out a box. I took it. “The fire department was able to save some stuff and I’ve been waiting to hear from you to return it.”
“Thank you,” I said, honing in on the box. I sat on the curb and prepared to open it.
The woman joined me, lowering herself stiffly to the cold ground. “How did your marriage last so long?” I asked, using her presence as an excuse to delay opening the box.
“That’s a deep question,” she said, but she answered further. “The reason why generations before me don’t work is because they tend to run away when things get tough. They fail to realize that if they just extend a little understanding, most issues can be resolved. And forgiveness, well, to an extent, but we are all human. It's ok to make a mistake from time to time. Give the space that’s needed but once that time is up, lock each other in a room together, and don’t leave until it's resolved. Compromise and understanding each other’s needs are huge when it comes to a successful relationship, and that rings true for any kind of relationship, whether it be friends, parent to child, or marriage.”
I listened to her, soaking in all the information she gave me. I always just thought she was the nosey next-door neighbor, but she had solid advice. All signs pointed toward me facing my issues with Charlotte , head on. I felt like I needed to go back and give it another chance. How could I just leave her like that?
“Thank you,” I said, climbing to my feet.
Shit where am I going to put this? I held the box looking around and settled placing it in front of me. The hotel was only a few blocks away .
“That was very helpful,” I said. “I’ll see you later.”
The engine roared to life and I sped down the block.
When I got back to the hotel I’d been staying at, I placed the box on the television stand and sat on the edge of the bed. I couldn’t take my eyes off of it, and yet I yearned to open it. I had no idea what memories the firefighters had been able to recover, but I could feel the anxiety coursing through my body.
I didn’t know how long it took me to build up the courage to open the box. The clock ticked away, taunting me. But finally, I rose to my feet and peeled the flaps back gently. There were a few small things; things that didn’t matter all that much. A couple of lighters, a book of sudoku, and a glass cup. I moved those items aside so I could keep digging.
Singed papers followed suit, most of them being past due bills I’d paid years ago. It was junk. But directly underneath that I found folded neatly the baby blanket my mother had saved for me from my toddler stage. Once blue, it was now covered in soot and parts of the crocheted thread were coming apart.
I touched it gently, memories of myself as a child carrying that same blanket with me anywhere, I went. I remembered that it always seemed to smell like my mom, and it gave me comfort for a long time. Even as a grown man, when I needed to feel her presence, I would dig it out of the closet. I picked it up and buried my face in it. Somewhere within the smell of smoke and chemicals and years past, the smell of her still lingered, and I couldn’t help but cry.
She’d be so disappointed in me if she were alive, and I couldn’t help but wonder if her gentle words could have persuaded me to make things right with Charlotte. Sniffling and wiping my cheeks off, I set the blanket aside and continued my treasure hunt.
Burned photographs of Charlotte took up a corner of the box, and on the other side were the paintings she’d made for me; the one of my mother and me, and the other one was the painting of herself.
The sight of them brought fresh tears to my eyes as the events of the last few months hit me. I sat back down on the bed with the paintings in hand. I knew it would be nearly impossible to fix what was broken, but I had to hold out hope that Charlotte would one day want me back.
Looking at the broken and burned memories saddened me, but I vowed that I wouldn’t succumb to the sadness any longer. I’ll rebuild my home… I thought, and I hoped that one day she would want to share the space with me. Maybe she could heal in a place that wasn’t a constant reminder of the things she lost. She seemed to do pretty well at the cabin, so if I rebuilt my family home and asked her to move in, maybe it would help her.
I understood that I was probably scaring her with the things I’d done, and I could admit to myself that I lost myself briefly within my own anger and need for revenge. I knew I’d been angry, but I didn’t realize how angry and distant I’d really been. One thing that Charlotte was right about was that no amount of bodies would take away the feeling of anger, failure, and hurt. I was compensating for something I’d failed at by making sure I would never fail again, and in the meantime I’d failed at helping her heal. I’d walked away from her when she needed me the most.
A nagging feeling in the back of my mind told me that she would never trust that I wouldn’t relapse again. She knew I’d never stop hurting people, and if she took me back she’d always be terrified of me walking away again. I hadn’t been the one to break her, but I’d finished the job.
The sound of my phone pinging pulled me out of my thoughts, and I blinked away my tears. Wiping my nose, I opted to ignore the message and keep looking through the box. But what if it’s her…
I couldn’t quell my curiosity any longer. Picking up the phone, I read the message.
“I love you. Please come home.”
Maybe her request wasn’t so far-fetched, I had been doing research and it's…normal. I think. We both needed to let everything go in order to move on. If treating her like she wanted me to would help her heal, why shouldn’t I?
I’ll do it. One last time…
Charlotte
Roe never responded to the message, though I’d stayed up most of the night hoping and waiting. Sleep finally overtook me, and I drifted amid the warm silkiness of my comforter. But just as I was about to have the sweetest dream ever, I felt my blanket being ripped off my bed and my eyes shot open.
A hand closed around my throat, and another clamped tightly over my mouth as I was dragged from the safety of my bed. I tried to scream, panic overtaking me, but only a muffled moan escaped around the grasp of the hand. I clawed at the hand that was closing off my airway, hoping I’d be able to scratch hard enough to make my attacker let me go. They're not taking me. I'm not going back.
Vivid memories of Walker with his hand around my neck rose to my mind, and I began to hyperventilate. I screamed Rowan’s name into the hand on my mouth in vain, forgetting that he wasn’t there to protect me. I’m on my own this time .
I recoiled my hand and used the strength I had in my sleepy state to wriggle and elbow them right in the abdomen, causing a painful grunt to leave their lips. I moved fast trying to grab at the mask on their face attempting to rip it clean off. I’m a fighter, they may have had me before, but never again.
They let go and I ran for the door as fast as my shaky legs could take me. My office. That would be the safest place…I think. Most of my men were on assignments, and after everything I preferred for them to have homes of their own, letting Rowan and I run things how we saw fit, and Charlie’s room was on the other side of the house, I would never make it to get help from him. As I ran, it felt like the hallways stretched, gaining feet with every step I took.
The footsteps came closer and faster and I took off down the stairs and cried out tripping about halfway down when I turned to look back. Slowly I rose and I limped toward the kitchen ripping through drawers, the only light illuminating from above the sink.
A meat cleaver was the only thing I could find in the haste, so I picked it up with shaky hands, whipping around when I heard a sinister chuckle. They towered over me, and I immediately took a swing aiming for the person’s head, but I was too slow and my wrist was grabbed with ease. I yelped as they placed pressure on my wrist, squeezing. I had to let go of the cleaver, and my body was being crushed between the sink and their body.
“I’m not scared of you,” I whispered menacingly. “Do your worst. It can’t be compared to anything I’ve already been through.”
A deep-rooted laugh sounded from them as their thumb brushed across my bottom lip and my eyes widened when the long metal handle of the meat cleaver touched my lips.
“Suck it.” They growled. “Cry for me as I shove it so far down your throat, it comes out of your ass.”
I had nowhere to go and survival mode kicked in, so I did it. My tongue swirled around the metal until I moved my lips back and forth taking as much as I could down my throat and the asshole groaned at every gag that came the further it was pushed down my throat and tears sprung to my eyes. Tightening his hand around my throat he held it there, and I gasped for breath.
“I can’t wait to have that pretty mouth around my cock. Taking a seven inch face-fucking. But right now, I want to feel you.”
“Fuck. You.” And I spit onto his mask.
I flinched when his hand moved close to my face before fisting in my hair and forcing my front, bending me over against the sink.
“Plug it and turn the water on,” he ordered.
I clenched my jaw in defiance but didn't move.
“Now!” They yelled, and I obeyed, pulling the metal up and turning the water on. My thighs squeezed shut as I felt my body turn on me and a leg stepped between them, pulling them apart. The water continued to run, and I jumped when I felt a finger rub along my center before being replaced by a hard cock. They stayed there for a moment and my heavy breaths stilled just enough for them to enter me roughly.
“N–N,” I tried to scream out, but I couldn’t.
A large hand shoved my head underwater while they fucked into me ruthlessly refusing to miss a beat. My head jerked as my body fought for air and I braced my hands against the sink, trying to escape the torture, but whoever this was they were too strong, and a harsh slap came down on my ass.
Stars swam through my vision, as they pulled me up by my hair letting me take a few quick breaths before shoving me back down again. I cried out into the water as I felt my leg being lifted to rest on the counter and a finger teased my clit.
I slowly lost energy as the splashing water became a calm sea. I was ripped out of the water just before my orgasm claimed me and brought?to the person's chest when the gruff voice whispered, “It’s what you wanted, right?”
I couldn't answer as my swimming vision pulled me under.
My shoulders ached, and I couldn’t move my arms. My head pounded, and my mouth was dry. With a pained moan, I slowly opened my eyes and panic took over as the memory of what had happened came back to me. My arms were tied over my head and I was suspended in the middle of the room.
The room ? I took in my surroundings and recognized Roe’s cabin. Wiggling my wrists in their restraints, I looked at the rope binding me and felt the soft velvet. It was different from what Walker did to me, and I looked around for Roe as my heartbeat slowed a fraction.
Sure enough, Rowan walked in and smiled at me. “I was hoping you’d be awake,” he said excitedly. “You made that really fucking hard, but God, did I enjoy it.”
I tried to respond, but there was a gag in my mouth, and it filled with saliva as I realized what was happening. He’s doing it…it was him. I thought, relief flooding my veins. I took him in; a welcome sight after not seeing him or hearing his voice in days. He was dressed in a pair of jeans that clung low on his waist, and he was shirtless. The mask I’d given him rested on the top of his head, it was different from the one he originally had on, when he took me.
“Once I lower this mask, there’s no backing out. This is your last chance.”
He stepped up to me and tugged the gag out of my mouth.
“I want to hear you say it,” he said, searching my eyes.
“I knew it was you. Your glove was slacked where your finger should be.” I laughed.
He grabbed my chin harshly, forcing my gaze to his and his features darkened. “Stop being a brat and tell me what I want to hear, or are you scared you can’t handle it?”
“Please, Rowan. Break me,” I said, my tone begging for his touch.
He nodded and replaced the gag. He walked over to a table against the wall and picked up a long, wand-like vibrator.
“You keep knocking on the devil’s door, Charlotte,” he chuckled menacingly, circling me like a predator stalking his prey. I couldn’t see him anymore and I cried out as a harsh sting spread across my ass. I arched my back, pulling against the ropes, helpless against his advances.
“And he’s about to answer. There’s no safe word. No lighter. I’m going to do whatever I want to this sweet body, and you will fight it. I want you to.”
I heard him pull the mask down to cover his face, and suddenly the room went dark before a red, glowing light illuminated everything. He flipped a switch, and the room was filled with the familiar buzzing of the vibrator.
“Not one person is going to hear your pleas for me to stop,” he said, and he pulled a cloth out of his pocket, and placed it over my eyes, tying it at the back of my head. “So you’re going to have to take it like a good fucking whore.”
He caressed me, sending goosebumps over my entire body. His warm hands filled the void in my heart, and I arched my back against his chest in appreciation. Following his hands, he ran the vibrator across my skin, teasing a moan out of my mouth as it ran over my nipples, causing them to harden and pebble out, before dropping it below my hips and pressing it against my clit.
I spread my legs in anticipation of what was to come, allowing better access. He moved in slow circles, my hips rocking with it, and dipped the head of it inside me, eliciting another moan before sliding it out and using my own juices as lubrication for the vibrator. He was driving me crazy, and it wasn’t long before an orgasm crashed over me.
He pulled back on the vibrator and inserted his fingers inside me.
“God, you’re so wet,” he groaned, fucking into me mercilessly.
While he moved, he returned the vibrator to its place on my clit and rocked it back and forth, and soon I was overcome with another screaming orgasm. Before it was over, Rowan’s fingers and the wand disappeared, and I groaned as my muscles clenched around nothing. And then I felt his hands on my hips.
He caressed my backside, spreading me open, and I felt his hard, ready cock press against my asshole.
I gasped as he inserted his tip and held it there.
“I love you Lottie, but tonight, I need you to hate me,” he grunted as he spoke and buried himself to the hilt inside my ass.
I cried out, unable to stand the pain, and my vision blurred. One of his hands reached for the vibrator flicking it on, while the other wrapped around my throat. It hurt like hell as he fucked me in deep, long strokes. But it was replaced by the intense pleasure the vibrator was giving me.
“Look at you, taking my cock all the way up your ass like a good fucking whore,” he barked. “Relax and open up for me.”
I pulled at the ropes that held me hostage, crying out as my ass tightened around his length. Tears pricked at my eyes as my orgasm riddled me, but he didn’t let up squeezing and pinching my nipples, and I fought against the ropes pulling on them, but it was only causing my hips to push his dick further inside of me with each stroke.? “Just like that Princess, cry for me.”
I could hear his breath accelerate as he pounded into me ruthlessly.
I whimpered as his cock swelled, and he released. Adding pressure to my throat he said, “I should drop you to your knees and make you taste your ass for that comment earlier.”
He pulled out, and his seed leaked from my asshole, dripping to the floor below. I felt dirty, and that was exactly how I?wanted it, he took a moment and I heard the water running before he came back. Relief flooded over me, I thought he was going to undo the rope and allow me freedom, but I was wrong.
“Awe did you think we were done?” he asked, the screech of a chair scraped across the floor and stopped in front of me.
“Oh no, I'm only just beginning. You thought you were broken by them, maybe you were,” he said, snapping gloves against his wrist. He stalked over to me, grabbing a fistful of my hair, tilting my head back and ripping the blindfold off.
“You haven't been broken by me Lottie, the things I'm going to do to you, will have you questioning every moral you were raised on.”
He removed the gag and a trail of saliva followed which he scooped up with his hand and rubbed over my face before sliding it down my body, teasing me.
I fought against my restraints when his hand made its way inside of me, his fingers fucking into me and I growled in f r ustration when he ripped them away.
“Taste yourself, you dirty slut.” He ordered as his gloved hands slid into my mouth and down my throat.
Our eyes locked from behind the mask and he whispered, “After tonight, you will learn to love the abuse, and I will give it to you anytime you ask. I’ll be the only one you crave for the rest of your life.”
Holy fuck.
I wanted to be wrapped up in him forever, but the night was just getting started. He moved away, dragging something across the floor, and I shook my head, confused, when the realization came to me. A dildo, it's a fucking machine. He grabbed the ropes, pulling me closer, placing pads attached to wires on my thighs, and turning the dial causing it to send electricity coursing pleasurably through my body.
“Control your breathing, if you don’t,” he turned the dial again, and I cried out. “You get punished.”
He flipped the machine on, and I watched as he walked over to the chair sitting down. He wrapped his hand over his cock giving it a couple strokes and I moaned into the gag watching him pleasure himself as the dildo fucked into me slowly.
My breaths were heavy and sweat was littered all over my body. I didn't know how much more I could take, but that wasn't my choice, I was done when he was satisfied. I forgot to breathe again being too lost in the pleasure of being filled up by the thick silicone and my eyes widened flicking over to Roe before the shock came and I arched against the ropes. Not long after I regained control, the dildo drove into me faster and harder. My eyes rolled back and my body convulsed as I let loose with a whimper. I glanced up at Roe with heavy eyes and noticed he was still stroking slowly at my torture. Another shock came to me, and he laughed.
The intense pleasure of being forced into so many orgasms exhausted me, and I couldn't hold my eyes open any longer. My arms slacked against the ropes and I fell into darkness.
When I woke up again, I was tied spread-eagle on the bed, each of my limbs stretched to the max. I started to think I had a stroke, there was no recollection of how I ended up in the bedroom spread out like this.
Rowan was kneeling over me, pumping his shaft with one hand and adjusting a rope with the other.
“Welcome back, Princess,” he teased. I soon learned what the rope’s purpose was as I felt the vibrator touch my sensitive clit, and he cinched the rope tighter, holding it in place.
Moan after moan fell out of my mouth as the vibrator serviced me, and I tried to buck my hips, but my restraints didn’t allow for movement. Something pressed against my asshole, and I flinched, remembering the pain Rowan had caused me before I passed out. He?pressed on the plug, and I felt it glide into my ass.
“I–I can’t take it,” I tried to cry out around the gag. He must have returned it to my mouth when I passed out.
A tingling sensation began to build within me and I knew I was about to come. I moaned, and Rowan said, “You’re going to take what I give you.”
He moved up my body, so he was kneeling over my face, removing the gag before shoving his cock roughly into my mouth. I didn’t have time to draw a breath before he was all the way down my throat. Tears flooded my vision as he mercilessly drove into me, gagging me and taking away my breath.
Wave after wave of orgasm washed over me as the endless vibrator coaxed them out of me.
After a while, they became uncomfortable, and I began trying to stave off my pleasure. I turned my head to the side, pleading with my wet eyes for him to ease up. I knew it was what I wanted; I’d asked for it. And I knew he wasn’t going to go easy on me.