Chapter 14 #2
“Whatever game this is, you’re the one who sets the rules, and I don’t like that.”
He uses his thumbs to rub his temples. “This is what it is… Let’s move on.” He sounds frustrated with himself.
I claw my hair. “Fine.”
The silence in the room still roars because there’s a storm of tension. I pivot to leave, only to pause. “Julian.”
He flicks his gaze back to me. “Yes?”
“Do you regret what happened?” I shouldn’t ask, I should leave it, but I’m not always logical.
He traps his tongue between his teeth, and it’s a second or two before he audibly breathes. “Would saying yes makes it easier?”
Typical Julian. A blurred answer. It’s an unfair strategy.
“I’m not answering that.”
A sharp muffled sound leaves him. “Of course, you wouldn’t. You don’t make my life easy,” he remarks affectionately.
“Ditto,” I counter softly.
It’s a long stretch of seconds that we get lost staring at each other. My chest thrums, and he appears conflicted yet able to remain reserved.
I pretend to wipe my hands and erase the tone. “Done and dusted. Back to work.” It’s my effort to move us along with the day.
Even if it’s clear that no eraser will help us because neither one of us can forget.
Some people really need to read the instructions better.
It would make my life easier. Someone from IT reset the system incorrectly, which set almost everyone back a few hours of work.
I have zero regrets that I went out for lunch and did some shopping, including picking up a new box of fruit snack gummies.
I’m mentally preparing myself for the hours of work ahead. It’ll be a long day.
When I approach my desk with my shopping bag in hand, my eyes squint because I notice a small box on my desk.
I set my things down and shimmy off my sweater as I examine the blue box with a white ribbon.
Unlike the flowers, this has a little card with my name on it.
I pick it up and open the envelope to pull out the card with beautifully typed wording.
Congratulations on completing your degree.
Haven Crossroads
Strange. Unless Elodie spread news like wildfire, I haven’t informed anybody else. I untie the satin ribbon and lift the lid of the blue cardboard box, brush the tissue paper to the side, and I completely stall because my heart jumps.
A necklace with a key charm.
Why would this be the present? It dawns on me that I mentioned something to Julian. Barely a sentence, yet he must have remembered.
This man.
He’s making my head spin again.
But right now, I can only smile softly and appreciate the gesture.
Only to acknowledge with disappointment that it is another turn in the labyrinth of a game neither of us can decide whether we want to win or lose.
The tide inside me turns again when I realize how this isn’t a scenario that I should’ve found myself in.
It only causes anger, and here I go from zero to a hundred again today.
Storming to Julian’s office, I don’t bother knocking on his open door, as he is busy typing on his laptop.
“Strange.” I grab his attention purely with my voice, and he whips his attention to me. “I received a company gift because of a special occasion.”
“Did you? HR arranges those things.” He plays oblivious as he settles back in his chair.
I’m annoyed that he’s deflecting.
I walk straight to his desk and drop the gift in front of him. His eyes pierce the box, but he doesn’t move. “I’m not a whore.”
He brings the knuckle of his long finger up to drag across his upper lip, and his sight remains drilled to the present. “You are not a whore,” he echoes back.
“We can’t fuck and you buy a necklace as if nothing happened.” There is rage in my voice.
His jaw ticks, and he bites the inside of his cheek as he accepts my wrath.
“That’s not what I’m doing. Trust me, jewelry and women are a dangerous move that blurs expectations…
It would be irresponsible of me to forget that rule.
” I sense the struggle as he realizes his actions, the awareness bleeds through him, and it’s apparent. “As I said, HR—”
“Sends expensive pens as gifts for employee milestones. Not necklaces.” Pointing a finger at him, he has now turned unreadable. I continue. “Cut the crap, and either way, I shouldn’t accept such a thing, but somebody clearly picked it out with knowledge.”
“Maybe.” His look is resigned.
“That person should know it could be seen as thoughtful, even if they have a fucked-up way of communicating most of the time. They might even be a coward.”
He stretches his neck, uncomfortable, clearly offended by my suggestion. “You should really take up your concerns with HR.”
I shake my head, now irritated how he wants to hide behind a facade.
At least my suspicious are confirmed. He doesn’t want to forget the weekend, and he does believe he could be destined for more than just sex with someone, I’m twisting everything inside of him.
For now, a confirmation is all I need. Everything else will revolve the way it should, in either direction.
Sighing, I give up on this conversation. Pivoting, I walk away, maybe even with an intentional sway. “This talk is a waste of time, just as much as the mess that IT left us all.”
I’m about to leave, but Julian saying my name stops me.
“Congratulations. You should be proud.”
I glance over my shoulder. “How did you know?”
His cheeks tighten, and he fights an affectionate smile. “I overheard you talking with Elodie. And no, I wasn’t stalking, you were literally in our office building, and I made a point for you not to notice me because it made the morning easier.”
“And did it?”
He chuckles quietly to himself. “Not even a dent.”
I almost grin but keep myself in check. “Sorry to hear that.”
Julian rubs his face with his hands. “You should leave. Now.” There is a smile he wants to stop when he says it.
Because he isn’t immune to succumbing to a woman, and he is only beginning to realize that.
And it happens to be me.