Chapter 24
LAWSON
I sigh, burrowing farther into the pillow top of my bed. The arm around my waist tightens and soft lips brush my chest. A sleepy smile tilts my lips and I turn my head into her wild curls, inhaling the scent of strawberries.
“Morning.”
She hums, tilting her head up and blinking open her eyes slightly. “Morning, handsome.”
My eyebrows raise. “You think I’m handsome?”
She nods. “Oh yeah, the bed head and morning breath are really doing it for me.”
Her squeal pierces the morning air as I roll us, trapping her under my heavy body.
“What are you doing?” She laughs, her hands sliding up my sides as I settle over her.
“What else is doing it for you, sunshine?”
“What?” Her face drops, cheeks growing pink.
“What else about me does it for you?”
“Fishing for compliments, are we?”
“Just… curious.”
Putting on a menacing smile, she pulls me closer. “Why so curious?” she asks, her voice slightly slurred and low-toned.
I jerk my head back. “Did you just quote the bad guy from Batman?”
She rolls her eyes. “His name is The Joker. Come on, how do you not know that?”
I shrug. “More of a Marvel guy myself.”
She hums. “I thought you’d prefer D.C. over Marvel.”
“And why is that?”
“They tend to be slightly darker movies and you’re a slightly darker man. Same same, but different.”
“I am not dark.”
She widens her eyes and glances over at my open closet. “You only own dark clothing.”
“Just because I like wearing black doesn’t mean I’m all dark and scary.”
“Yes, because the permanent scowl you used to wear like a shield just screams rainbows and good times.”
“Used to, huh?”
She nods, her hand sliding from my side, up my chest, and over my jaw. “It hasn’t been there as much lately.”
That’s because of you.
Her fingers keep tracing my jaw, shifting slightly until they run across my stubbled cheek, and then my bottom lip.
My eyes drop to her mouth and I feel the deep rise and fall of her chest as I instinctively lower, closing whatever space is left between us. I stiffen when her legs spread wider and a groan builds in my throat at the feel of her warmth calling to me.
Clearing my throat, I speak lowly into the growing tension floating through the air. “You’re playing with fire, sweetheart.”
“Am I?” she asks breathlessly, gasping when she shifts her hips and brushes against my already hard cock.
“Sydney,” I growl.
“What?”
“We need to stop.”
“Uh huh.” She nods, her hands growing eager as they pull on my hips.
“Sunshine,” I whisper and she looks up, lust sparkling in her blue eyes. “I don’t want to mess this up with you.”
Her hold on my hips relents and she softens underneath me. “You couldn’t mess up with me.”
“You don’t know that.”
“I do. I do know that.”
I blow out a breath and my eyes bounce between hers. “You sound so sure about that.”
“Maybe because I am.”
Her hands slip between us and her fingers trace the tattoos on my chest. It’s a calming habit I’ve noticed she’s picked up over the last couple weeks, usually tracing whatever piece of my inked skin she can find.
I don’t know if she realizes that the motion doesn’t only work on her, and every time she starts, I dread the moment she’ll stop.
“So you want to talk about us? Because in real relationships, starting a conversation like that doesn’t typically mean anything good is about to happen.”
I open my mouth to try and explain that this only ends one way, with her being mine, but she quickly cuts me off.
“But I understand if you didn’t know that, seeing as you said you’d never been in a relationship before.” Her eyes widen. “Not that I’m saying you don’t know what you’re doing, I’m sure you do.”
My lips twitch as she continues to ramble.
“I mean, of course you know what you’re doing. ‘I don’t say or do things I don’t mean.’ Isn’t that what you said once before? Of course it is, because you wouldn’t have said it if you didn’t mean to say it.”
“Sydney,” I cut her off and shift so my hand is buried in her hair.
“Yes,” she squeaks, her light eyes wavering slightly.
“Breathe.”
“Uh huh, yeah. Breathe.” She sucks in a breath before letting it out.
“Good girl,” I murmur and her already flushed cheeks darken to another rosy shade. “As I was saying, I think we should talk before taking that step. Open communication, remember? We both need to be okay before—”
Shadow’s barks cut me off and I turn my head, watching as he takes off running down the hall. My eyebrows furrow and Sydney shifts beneath me, lifting to prop herself on her elbows. A second later, I hear the front door open and Jace’s deep voice as he greets my dog.
Sighing, I drop my head to Sydney’s shoulder and groan. She giggles, lifting her other hand to run through my hair.
“I’m starting to regret giving him a key,” I mumble.
“You should have known he’d take it as an open invitation to pop in whenever he wants.”
Lifting my head, I knock my nose against hers. “Yeah, you Collins kids seem to lack the understanding of space.”
“Hey, you’re the one who’s currently pinning me to your bed. Not the other way around.”
My body heats at the idea of her on top of me, taking charge with the confidence I know that is hiding down in there somewhere. I don’t think I’d mind her being in control at all.
“Hello! Wakey wakey!” Jace calls up the stairs. “You’ve had enough days to seclude yourselves in whatever bubble this is. I’m here to officially pop it and bring you back into society.”
I sigh. “I should go see what he wants before he comes looking for me up here.”
She nods, glancing down at our current position. “That’s probably a good idea. I think you’d have to smother me with that pillow if my brother catches us like this… again.”
I chuckle at the memory of him walking in on me pinning her to her bed a few weeks ago. But there’s a difference between then and now. Back then, I had to hold myself back from doing what I’m about to do now.
Bending down, I seal my lips over hers. She hums, arching into me and wrapping her arms around my neck. I groan when her hips move against me and reluctantly pull back.
“I really should—”
“Yeah,” she agrees breathlessly, nodding. “Go.”
With one last look at her, I push myself up and out of bed. Stretching my arms above my head, I don’t miss the way her eyes hungrily rake over my nearly naked form.
Smirking, I press my palms against the bed and lean over her. “Like what you see?”
She opens her mouth but a pleading voice cuts her off. “Please, lord, don’t answer that.”
Our heads whip to the doorway where her brother stands.
“Shite,” I grumble.
“Jace!” Sydney shrieks, pulling the blankets up over her head.
I chuckle and pull the blanket back down. She glares at me before sitting up, my T-shirt spilling over her shoulders and pooling at her hips.
She’s slept here every night since we got home four days ago.
And every night, I catch her slipping into my closet to steal another piece of my clothing.
Little does she know that I’ve been purposely placing the shirt I wear that day right at the front so she always has one that smells the strongest of my cologne.
Do I see it as a way of marking my territory? Yes. Yes I do. Because even when she’s not in my clothes, I want my scent to linger on her skin so every bastard out there knows she’s taken.
“Stop being a creep and go back downstairs.”
Jace pouts. “I am not a creep.”
Sydney throws her arms out and scoffs. “Says the man currently standing in the doorway where his half naked best friend and sister are.”
He winces and throws a thumb over his shoulder. “I’ll just be—”
“Yep!”
He scurries away, slamming the bedroom door behind him.
“Maybe you should take that key back,” she grumbles.
I chuckle and lean forward, nudging the side of her head with my nose. “After all that, I’m sure it’ll be waiting for me on the countertop downstairs.”
She giggles and wraps her arms around my neck. I stand, taking her with me and securing her legs on my hips. “Let’s hurry before he eats all those baked treats I know Kinsley sent him over with.”
She gasps and nudges at my chest. I put her down and she tears into the bathroom. “Not my chocolate muffins!”
Despite moving at breakneck speed to get ready, I still beat Sydney downstairs. I promised I’d make sure her brother kept his grubby hands off anything chocolate so that she could properly do her skincare routine after seeing her panic over skipping it.
Stepping into the kitchen, I scowl at the smear of chocolate on the corner of his mouth. Silently, I reach for the pink pastry box and slide it away from him. He goes to protest but stops when I lift an eyebrow.
Throwing his hands up. “Fine. Fine. The rest is all hers.”
I set the box aside and start the process of making her morning cup of sugar as well as my simple black coffee. “So, what are you doing here, aside from stealing pastries that are supposed to be for someone else?”
He chuckles and I slide him over a cup of coffee and some creamer. “I couldn’t help it. Kinsley is trying out a bunch of new recipes and I’m her self-appointed taste tester.”
“Uh huh. What a weight it is you carry.”
He snorts. “I swear if it wasn’t for training, I’d be five hundred pounds by now.”
I smile into my cup. “So you thought you’d steal another one?”
He shrugs. “Think of it as my delivery tax.”
I laugh and shake my head.
He leans against the counter, eyes darting to the stairs. “So, how are things?”
I lift my eyebrows at my best friend. “We are not talking about my relationship with your sister.”
“I’m not asking for the dirty details.” He shivers in disgust.
“Didn’t think you were.”
He rolls his eyes. “I’m just asking if everything is good, are you happy, is she happy?”
I pause, taking a sip of my coffee as I contemplate his question.
Are things good? I mean, I think so. She wouldn’t be sleeping in my bed every night if things weren’t. Right?
Am I happy? I’m always happy with any amount of time I get with her. And lately it’s been a lot. Since she’s agreed to this arrangement, I’ve felt things shift inside my chest.
The lingering sting of panic has slowly been eased by the warmth of her hand over my heart. The crushing weight of my fear of not being worthy lifts with each light laugh she shares with me. The shadow of my demons has been evaporated by the shining light of her smile.
So, yeah. I’m happy. Because even if this is supposed to be fake, I still get to call her mine.
But is she happy? Lord, I fucking hope so.
“Yeah. Everything is grand.”
“Are you two finally together or are you both still in denial over your real feelings?”
“What are you—”
“I’m here! I’m here! If there is one single crumb missing from that box, there will be hell to pay!” Sydney calls as she slides into the kitchen on socked feet.
She snatches the box from the counter and takes the offered drink with a kiss on my cheek before settling onto a stool at the island. Flipping the box open, she licks her lips and wiggles her fingers as she chooses her first victim.
Jace slides onto the seat next to her and she slaps at his hand when he reaches for a pastry. She picks up a chocolate puff that looks to be topped with strawberries and takes a massive bite.
I smirk as her eyes roll back in her head. “Ohmygodthatssogood.”
“Oh yeah. She made that one special for you.”
“I love your wife.”
“I do too.”
She swallows and licks crumbs from the corner of her lips. “So, how has your break been?”
“It’s always good to be home. I miss having the family travel to races with me, but with the pregnancy, we don’t want to risk any kind of stress. It can be a lot, traveling with two kids.”
Sydney nods, reaching for another pastry. “Any plans for this weekend before we head out for the next race?”
“That’s actually something I was about to ask the two of you.” Sydney and I share a look as her brother continues. “Kinsley has had a bit of an energy boost as of late and was wondering if we all wanted to go out for an adults only night.”
“Oh yay! Like a triple date?”
He smiles. “Yeah, I guess you could say that.”
“Where does she want to go?”
Jace eyes me and I set my coffee cup on the counter. Smirking, he leans forward, waiting for my reaction as he speaks. “She’s in the mood to dance.”
Sydney’s bubbly laughter echoes around the kitchen at the same time I throw my head back and groan.