Chapter 14 #3
“Looks like I’ve already lost,” Liam scowled. “Look at him. Six feet tall, blue eyes, perfect red hair. He’s prolly got a nine inch dick under there, too. How am I supposed to compete with that?” Liam scowled into his beer.
Sometimes, it was easy to forget he was only twenty-one, until he went and said something like that. Connor could only laugh.
“Benji is thirty-two. He’s looking for someone his own age to settle down with. Ryan's a little young for him.”
Liam didn't respond, only took an angry swig of his beer, watching them dance.
So Connor nudged him again.
“When the song’s over, you're gonna go up to them, you're gonna apologize for being a dick, and you're gonna ask Ryan to dance with you,” he said plainly. “Ask Benji if you can steal Ryan first. Say those words. ‘I'm sorry I was a dick.’ Think you can do that?”
Liam scowled.
“You're one to talk. I heard you turning Benji down. What's up with that?”
Connor only shrugged noncomitally, sipping his beer as he looked for Junie in the crowd.
Squeezed between two women in leather jackets, exactly where she wanted to be.
“Song’s ending soon. Go talk to Ryan,” Connor said, patting Liam on the shoulder before wandering off to take a walk around the club.
It wasn't Latin music, not even close, but he wondered how close it might have been to the dance halls Nate spoke so fondly of. And for a moment, Connor found himself overcome with loneliness there in that crowd, watching the lights, the dancing bodies, wishing he'd brought Nate along.
But that never would have worked.
Junie's expression as he walked into her apartment with Nate on his arm might have been comical if not for the explanation that would have needed to come–and then that would mean Liam, Ryan, Benji knowing. And if Benji knew, no doubt he was telling Mia, and suddenly half the legal department knew.
Not to mention Berkshire.
No, it never would have worked.
Across the dance floor, he watched as Liam worked up the nerve to approach Ryan and Benji, his shoulders up near his ears as he awkwardly addressed Benji, as Benji clapped him on the back and walked away.
Ryan crossed his arms, but only half-heartedly, because they were falling back down to his sides in a moment as Liam took his hand, as the two were swaying in an easy rhythm to a Phoebe Bridgers song.
Twenty-one felt like a lifetime away for Connor, remembering the days of cramming as many classes into each semester as possible so he could maximize his time with Dawson on breaks.
He never truly felt home for the summer until he was sitting in the passenger seat of Dawson's Jeep, the two of them building their fantasies of life outside Ohio.
Again, Connor thought of Nate, a sense of longing in his chest.
“Those kids, I think they'll be okay.”
Connor looked up to see Benji returning to join him at the little table, wiping sweat off his forehead before cleaning his glasses against the black cotton of his shirt.
“Yeah. They're good kids.”
“Working through their problems better than I ever did at that age, that's for sure.”
For a moment, Connor found himself looking for Junie in the crowd, seeing her by herself, getting another drink at the bar.
“Maybe better than any of us,” he said, before giving Benji a smile. “Do me a favor, make sure she gets home okay?”
“You got it. I'll take care of the kids, too.” And Benji gave Connor a knowing smile. “You get home safe, too.”
He knew better than to slip out of the bar without letting Junie know where he was going, and he caught her right as she turned around, a pink cosmopolitan in hand.
“Getting another drink?” she asked, eyeing his empty hands as she took a sip of her cosmo.
“I think I'm heading out. Planning to surf in the morning,” Connor said, deciding it wasn't completely a lie. Still, Junie pouted, her head cocked to the side.
“And just when I'd finally gotten you out,” she said, in such a way that tugged at Connor's heart.
“Won't be the last time. This was fun,” Connor assured her.
Junie smiled, seemingly satisfied with that.
“Good. You balance this group out. Get home safe.”
And then Connor left, deciding to walk downtown Costa Mesa for a few moments before he called an Uber, just so he could call Nate.
He didn't know why, but he just knew Nate would still be awake.
The line rang only twice before Nate picked up.
“Connor? What's up?”
“Nothing, just wanted to call you.”
“I thought you were going out tonight.”
“I did. I'm going home in a couple minutes.”
There was a beat, and then Nate spoke again.
“So did you miss me?” He asked, and Connor could tell he was smiling.
Hell, he felt himself smile, too.
“Maybe I did. So what are you doing tonight?”
“Well, you'd be proud of me.”
“Oh yeah? Why?”
“I went out to this massive outdoor mall in Irvine. I mean, the place was huge. Has a Ferris wheel and everything.”
“That's the Spectrum,” Connor said with a smile. “Get anything good to eat?”
“Yeah, sushi. You know, we have sushi in New York, but nothing like this. You like sushi?”
“Of course.”
It didn't need to be deep, and it certainly didn't need to be about anything important, but Connor couldn't have been happier to be talking about something as simple as food with Nate.