22. Lilian
Chapter 22
Lilian
The song changes, its rhythm slower, more intimate. I’m about to suggest a break to my dance partner when someone taps on his shoulder.
“Mind if I cut in?”
Sebastian.
My dance partner looks at me, a question in his eyes. I’m too stunned to react, and he shrugs, stepping away. “Sure, man.”
Sebastian’s hand takes mine, warm and firm.
“What are you—” I start.
He pulls me in, and I catch a whiff of his cologne, my stomach doing a little flip. His eyes lock onto mine, a mischievous glint in them.
“Dancing with you.” His other hand settles on my waist. “Is that a problem?”
I struggle to form a coherent thought, hyperaware of his touch, the heat of his body so close to mine. “I—no. I didn’t expect…”
“Didn’t expect what?” His voice drops, edged with a hint of playfulness. “That I’d want to dance with the most beautiful woman here? ”
Heat rises in my cheeks, but I try to brush off his comment with a scoff. “Flattery? Really?”
“It’s not flattery if it’s true, princess.” He draws me closer, our bodies swaying in perfect sync, muscle memory taking over.
It’s so natural, so right.
“How did you like the food?” I ask.
“Delicious.” His hand slides lower on my back, igniting a fire within me.
I suppress a gasp, my body responding to his touch like a livewire. “Sebastian,” I warn, my voice breathy. “Keep touching me like that, and people might get the wrong idea.”
“Or the right one.” His eyes darken, holding a promise that makes my pulse quicken.
I bite my lip.
“Princess.” His eyes drop to my mouth.
I inhale, catching a whiff of alcohol on Sebastian’s breath. “Have you been drinking?”
His grip tightens. “A little. It’s a wedding. People drink at weddings.”
“A little? You reek of it.”
“Don’t worry about it, princess. I’m fine.” He tries to pull me closer, but I resist.
“You’re not fine. You’re drunk.” I grab his face, struggling to keep his head still long enough to meet his eyes. “What’s going on with you?”
“Nothing. I wanted to celebrate my sister’s wedding. Is that a crime?”
“No, but getting wasted isn’t the answer.” I skim our surroundings, noticing a few curious stares. “Come on, let’s get you out of here.” I intertwine my fingers with his, guiding him off the dance floor.
“Where are we going?” he asks.
“To your room. You need to sleep this off. ”
We make our way to the elevator. The doors close, and he nuzzles my neck, his breath hot against my skin. “You always take such good care of me.”
I exhale slowly, struggling to ignore the way my body reacts to his closeness. “Someone has to.”
The elevator dings, and I practically drag Sebastian down the hallway to his room. He fumbles with the key card, and I snatch it from his hand, swiping it myself.
We stumble inside and to the bed. He collapses onto it, dragging me down with him, and I land on top, our faces inches apart.
“Stay with me.” His hand cups my cheek.
“You’re drunk, and I—”
He silences me, his thumb pulling down my lower lip. “Please, princess. I need you.” His voice cracks, raw with emotion.
A vulnerability he so rarely shows.
Raw need.
My heart aches for him, for us, for what we once had. Against my better judgment, I bend down, brushing my lips against his in a soft, tender kiss.
He responds immediately, his hand tangling in my hair, pulling me closer. The kiss deepens, grows more urgent, and I can feel his desire, his desperation. His hands roam my body, and I arch into his touch, a soft moan escaping my lips.
But when his hand slides under my dress—I break the kiss, pulling back. “Stop.”
He blinks up at me. “I thought—”
A heroine would probably swoon, overcome by the intensity of her feelings, the raw passion between them. She’d give in to her desires, propriety be damned .
I untangle myself from his embrace. “You’re drunk.”
“Fuck, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to—I would never—” He looks genuinely distressed.
“I know. I know you’d never intentionally hurt me.” Again. “But this… us… it’s not right. Not like this.”
“I miss you so fucking much, princess.”
Tears prick at the back of my eyes. “I miss you too,” I whisper. “But we can’t keep doing this to each other.”
A pained expression washes over his face. “I’m sorry for putting you in this position.”
I lower my head, pressing one last lingering kiss to his lips. “Goodbye, Sebastian.”
“This sounds like a farewell.”
“It is.” I stand, straightening my dress. “Get some rest. I’ll…” My voice wavers, betraying the emotions I’m trying to keep in check. “I’ll see you around.”
He looks up at me, his eyes filled with a mix of longing and resignation. “Yeah. See you around, princess.”
I turn to leave, but his voice stops me.
“Lil?”
My hand hovers over the doorknob. “Yeah?”
“I believe you. You never betrayed me.” His words are heavy with unspoken meaning. “And I... I’m sorry. For everything.”
I swallow the big lump in my throat. “Me too.” And with that, I walk out the door, letting it click shut behind me.
In the hallway, I slump against the wall, burying my head in my hands. Fan-fucking-tastic. I can’t keep doing this. I can’t keep letting him have this hold over me. Why does it always have to be so complicated with us? Why can’t I... let him go?
I know the answer.
It’s because, despite everything, a part of me will always love him. Will always be drawn to him.
When it comes to Sebastian Barron, I’m utterly lost.