36. Sebastian
Chapter 36
Sebastian
Her fingers wrap around my wrist, tugging me forward with a strength that belies her small frame. “This way.”
What is she planning?
We weave through the apartment until we reach the one place in this whole damn apartment that feels like her. The library.
She heads straight for the far corner where her sewing machine sits, covered and tucked away like a dirty secret. My steps falter, but her grip only tightens, pulling me onward.
“You sure about this, princess?” I search her face for any hint of hesitation, any flicker of doubt. After last time, I don’t want to push her into anything.
But those whiskey eyes blaze back at me with a fire that seemed lost, resolute. She nods once. “I’m sure. But I need you with me.”
Fuck, the trust in her gaze… it’s humbling. Terrifying. She’s willing to let me in and share this piece of herself with me. I thought I lost on that front.
I don’t deserve it. Don’t deserve her.
But I’m too selfish to walk away .
I help her set up the machine, arranging fabric and thread on the table. It’s been years since I’ve done this, but the motions come back like muscle memory.
Lil watches me, her head cocked to the side. I can practically see the gears turning behind those keen eyes, trying to figure me out. Good luck with that, princess. I’m a mystery even to myself most days.
“Okay, I think that’s everything.” I straighten up.
She steps closer to the machine, but she doesn’t sit. Instead, she chews on that plump lip, her teeth sinking into the soft flesh.
Christ, the things I want to do to that mouth…
Focus, Barron.
She peers up at me from under her lashes, almost shy. “Will you sit down?”
I blink at her. “What?”
“Please?” She gestures to the chair, an uncharacteristic uncertainty in her stance.
Far be it from me to deny her anything. I lower myself into the seat, still not quite sure what game we’re playing here. “Like this?”
“Perfect.” She moves toward me.
My hands flex on my thighs. What is she…
Oh.
Oh fuck.
She lowers herself onto my lap with a wiggle that shoots straight to my cock. My hands fly to her hips, steadying her. Stopping her. Because if she keeps moving like that, this is going to be over before it starts.
“Lil.” It’s half warning, half plea.
She just hums. “Put your arms around me.”
Jesus Christ .
I obey, my arms encircling her tiny waist and my chin finding the crook of her neck. She smells like home. Like everything I’ve ever wanted. Chocolate.
The machine whirs to life, and she starts to sew, the fabric slipping through her fingers. And I watch, entranced by her movements, scent, and the whirring of the machine.
In this moment, she’s not the broken girl haunted by her past. She’s an artist. A creator. Utterly in her element.
And I get to witness it. Get to hold her through it.
I don’t know how long we stay like that, wrapped up in each other, the rest of the world fading away. Minutes. Hours. Does it matter?
All I know is I never want it to end.
But then she huffs out a sigh, the machine stuttering to a stop. “Damn it.”
“What’s wrong?” I peer over, trying to see the problem.
“The thread keeps getting tangled. I can’t seem to get it right.”
“Here, let me.” I reach around her, taking the thread from her fingers.
It takes a few tries, but I manage to get it threaded, the needle gliding smoothly once more.
Lil twists to look at me. “How did you do that?”
“Oh, it’s pretty easy once you get the hang of it. You just—”
“No, I mean…” She shifts fully in my lap, straddling me, her hands braced on my shoulders. “How do you know how to do any of this? You can’t have learned it all from one class.”
Damn. Can’t put anything past her.
I slide my hands up her back, toying with the ends of her hair. “Would you believe me if I said it’s my hidden talent?”
She raises an eyebrow .
“Fine. You got me.” I lean in, my lips brushing the shell of her ear. “I took a class in college, and maybe Gem taught me a few things.”
Her breath hitches, fingers flexing on my shoulders. “You what? In college, when?”
“The first time you told me about it.” I nuzzle into her neck, placing a soft kiss on her pulse point. “I thought maybe…” Another kiss, slightly higher. “Maybe I could help you overcome this. And as cheesy as it sounds, be your knight in shining armor.”
“Sebastian.”
I tense, waiting for the rejection. The reminder that I’m no one’s knight in shining armor. Not hers. That I’m the villain in her story, the one who broke her heart and shattered her trust. The one who—
“You did that for me?” Her voice is so soft, so achingly vulnerable.
I cup her face in my palms. “I’d do anything for you. Then. Now. Always.”
It’s the truth. The ugly, messy, wonderful truth. This woman owns me, body and soul. Whether she wants me or not.
Her eyes search mine, looking for the lie. The catch. But there isn’t one. Not this time.
“I wanted to surprise you. Wanted to be there for you in whatever way you needed.” The words spill out of me, a confession long overdue. “Before I fucked it all up.”
Her thumb strokes over my cheekbone, a feather-light caress. “Sebastian.”
I squeeze my eyes shut, resting my forehead against hers. “I’m so fucking sorry, Lil. For everything. I was a coward. An asshole. I let my pride and my ego get in the way of the best thing that ever happened to me. I should’ve trusted what we had was real.” My arms tighten around her, clutching her to me like she might disappear if I let go. And maybe she will. Maybe this is all a dream, and I’ll wake up alone, aching for something I can never have again.
“I forgive you,” she says. “I forgave you a long time ago.”
My eyes fly open, locking with hers.
She already said those words once, but this time is different. She means them. Really means them.
I forgive you. Three words. Three simple words, but they heal something deep inside me, a wound I didn’t even know I was carrying and a wound that was destroying me from the inside.
“So we’re together again?” She shifts on my lap.
I brush my nose with hers. “I think that kiss at dinner was pretty obvious?”
“I don’t think it was obvious enough.”
“No?”
She smiles. “No.”
I surge forward, capturing her mouth with mine, pouring every ounce of longing and love into that kiss, one hand fisting in her silky hair while the other splays across her lower back, anchoring her to me.
She meets me with equal fervor, her arms locking around my neck, her body molding to mine. We were made for each other.
Every mistake, every wrong turn, every hurt… it was all leading us here. To this moment.
To a new beginning.
Her hips roll against mine, a delicious friction that has me groaning into her mouth. I’m hard in an instant, my cock straining against my zipper, desperate to be inside her.
But I force myself to slow down, to savor this. To worship her the way she deserves .
I trail my lips down her neck, sucking at her pulse point until she’s panting, her nails digging into my shoulders. With my hands, I skim over her back, mapping every dip and curve.
She breathes my name like a prayer, like a plea. “Sebastian.”
“Is this obvious enough, princess?” I punctuate each word with a kiss, a nip, a lick. “You’re mine.”
She whimpers, arching into my touch, silently begging for more. And fuck, I want to give it to her. Want to lay her out on this table and feast on her for hours until she’s trembling and sobbing and screaming my name.
Reluctantly, I pull back, my chest heaving, my pulse pounding in my ears. Lil blinks up at me, her eyes hazy with lust, her lips kiss-swollen and tempting.
“Why’d you stop?” She pouts, actually fucking pouts, and it takes every ounce of willpower not to dive back in and devour her.
“Because if we don’t stop now, I’m going to fuck you right here on this table.” I run my thumb over her bottom lip. “And as much as I want that… I want you in my bed. Want to spread you out and take my time with you.”
Her pupils dilate, her tongue darting out to wet her lips. “Then take me there, my knight in shining armor.”
Fuck. Yes.
I stand abruptly, lifting her with me, her legs wrapping around my middle. She squeals, clinging to my neck, dissolving into giggles, and I carry her out of the library and down the hall to my room.
Where she belongs.
I’m sitting in my office, studying the candid photo of Lil and me kissing at the restaurant. It’s been splashed across every tabloid and gossip site over the last week. Normally, I wouldn’t give a fuck, but this time… this time it’s different.
A knock at the door.
Emily pokes her head in, a new pack of Ibuprofen in hand. “Thought you might need these, boss.”
I barely glance up, my eyes still glued to the photo. “Still got half a pack left.”
“Really? I could’ve sworn.” Her steps come closer. “You sure you’re okay? Usually, you’re popping those things like candy.”
I shrug, finally tearing my gaze away from the photo. “Guess I haven’t needed them as much lately.”
She eyes me up and down. “That’s new.”
“What can I say? Maybe I’m turning over a new leaf.”
“Right.” Her eyes flick to the photo, a knowing smirk playing on her lips. “Uh-huh.”
I rest my elbows on the desk, my fingers steepled under my chin. “Careful, Em. You’re treading dangerously close to a line.”
“Hey, I’m making an observation. You’ve been different since she came back into your life. Happier. Less broody.”
I arch a brow. “Broody?”
“You know, all dark and tortured and shit. Like a discount Batman.”
“Did you just call your boss a discount Batman?”
She grins, unrepentant. “See? That’s what I’m talking about. So when are you going to man up and put a ring on her finger already?”
“It’s too early.”
“Is it? You’re head over heels for her. And judging by that photo?” She taps it. “She feels the same way. ”
“Emily.”
“Fine. I’m zipping up.” She sets the Ibuprofen on my desk. “In case you need them. Oh, and did you have time to review the Kensington’s documents?”
Thanks to Lil, I did. “Yes.”
“Already?” The sides of her mouth lift.
“Don’t.”
“Alright, I’ll leave you to it.” She walks toward the door and opens it, about to step out, but stops abruptly.
My father appears, brushing past her, and she shoots me a questioning look.
“It’s fine, Em.” I give her a nod.
She nods back, slipping out and closing the door behind her.
I sit back, my eyes tracing every subtle movement of my father. “Didn’t know we had an appointment.”
He strides into the room like he fucking owns the place. I mean, he used to, but that was before he handed the reins over to me. “Do I need an appointment to see my own son?”
“We both know you didn’t come here for a social call.”
He takes a seat in front of my desk, crossing his legs. “I saw the photo.”
Of course he did. Everyone and their mother has seen it by now. “And?”
“And I’m wondering what the hell you’re doing.”
“I’m living my life. Is that a problem?”
“It is when it involves that Edmunds girl.”
I can feel my blood pressure rising, my fingers itching to reach for the Ibuprofen. “Her name is Lil. ”
“I know her name,” he says. “What I don’t know is why you’re parading around with her like some lovesick puppy.”
“Lovesick puppy? Is that what you think this is?”
“Isn’t it? You’ve been obsessed with that girl since—”
“Obsessed?” I shake my head. “No. I love her. There’s a difference.”
He scoffs. “This isn’t a game. Her family—”
“Is none of your fucking business.” My voice turns low and dangerous. “Who I spend my time with is my choice, not yours.”
“It becomes my business when it threatens everything we’ve built.” He slams both of his hands on the desk.
I stand, matching his stance. “And what exactly have we built? A legacy of lies and manipulation? Of using people as pawns in your twisted games?”
“Watch your tone.” His voice is a growl, a warning.
But I’m done heeding his warnings. Done letting him control my life.
“No, you watch yours. Lil isn’t a pawn, and she sure as hell isn’t a threat. She’s the best fucking thing that’s ever happened to me, and I won’t let you or anyone else ruin that. I will make her my wife whether you like it or not.”
“That’s what you call the best thing? Ridiculous. Did you already forget what happened? You’re making a mistake. One you’ll regret.”
“The only mistake I made was letting her go in the first place. I won’t do it again.”
For a long moment, we remain locked in a silent battle.
“Still too stubborn for your own good,” he says.
“Learned from the best.” I offer my hand.
“Don’t say I didn’t warn you.” He shakes it.
“Does this mean you’ll accept Lil into the family? ”
“We’ll see. If she’s the one you choose, then I’ll give her a chance to prove she’s different from the rest of her blood.” His hand tightens around mine. “But if they try anything funny, the feud will seem petty in comparison to my wrath.”
“Fair enough.”
With a final squeeze, Dad releases my hand. “Well, I should be off. Your mother will be expecting me home for dinner. Call her. She’s… excited.”
“I will.”
He pauses at the door. “Did you tell her yet?”