Chapter 12
Chapter Twelve
Clover
When Saturday rolled around, we packed our stuff and drove the hour and a half to Medora. He had rolled into the shallow valley of town, passing prickly hills that thickened with stubby shrubs the closer we got. I had never been so excited to look for rocks.
We hadn’t checked into the motel yet. He had gone straight to the parking spot where we could hike one of the trails close to the Little Missouri.
The river trickled next to us. The weather was on the cool side, and it was spitting rain, keeping my proximity to the river limited.
I wasn’t interested in the muddy spots as much as the sandier parts of the shore, but I also didn’t want to drag a ton of mud into Van’s pickup or into the motel room.
Van remained undaunted. He had pulled out ponchos that he’d procured from somewhere and packed without me knowing. I wore some of my old hiking boots, and he had pulled on a pair of new ones before we took off.
The two of us were living together, partially to get back on our feet, but he’d purchased new clothing. We might be getting divorced, but he was setting the bar for any future guy, and he was placing it out of their reach.
I didn’t want a future guy. “How are your toes?”
“Fine.”
“No blisters?” Because of his thoughtfulness, I was hyper-concerned over his well-being.
“Clover, you don’t need to worry about me.”
“Would you tell me if I did?”
His smile was quick. “Painted Canyon was aptly named, huh?”
I rolled my eyes so he could see, and his grin only widened.
“Is it like a geologist’s dream?” he asked.
I was touched that he kept thinking of my career and asking questions. “Doesn’t everyone want to distinguish between siltstone and sandstone?”
“If they don’t, they should.”
“Hard agree.” I veered off the trail, stepping carefully closer to the water’s edge.
“There’s a little curve here, and the water level is down from earlier this year.
” I crouched at the edges where it was still a little gritty.
There was a gentle slope, and then a portion of the bank had been cut out by the river’s flow.
Van crouched next to me. “Is this another spot?”
“Possibly.” I’d found some petrified wood earlier. Van’s mind was blown that they weren’t rocks. Well, they were now, but they hadn’t always been. Though if we were to use the Wayback Machine, most had started as something else.
A tiny knob stuck out of the ground, and something about it called to me. I scraped the cold, wet dirt around it with my finger. More rock was exposed. I widened my attempt. “Ooh, this is just the tip of the iceberg.”
Gently, I moved enough damp sand aside, and my anticipation grew.
I found a nearby twig instead of digging into my tool kit.
Why use a small pry bar when my finger would work?
I was on the hunt for small treasures found in nature.
I didn’t want to disrupt nature to do it.
My normal job did enough of that, and it was also my job to mitigate the damage.
With my hobby, I liked the challenge of finding what was right in front of me.
“Is that it?” Van had been patiently waiting. Now he was leaning over so far he might tip into the wet dirt.
“I think so.” I brushed as much sand off it as I could. It got splattered with rain, and I used the moisture to wipe off the surface. “Yes—there.” I traced a faint, dark line. “There’s pitting, and this here is banding. I bet if we polished this up, it would turn a rich brown.”
Holding it up, I inspected the more translucent areas. Satisfaction seeped into me like the light rain soaked into the ground.
“You’re killing me, Clover. Agate or not?”
Chuckling, I handed it over. “We found an agate.”
“Nice.” He turned it several different directions, a faint smile on his face. “That’s cool.”
The shrewd but astounded way he looked at what others would see was a rock sent me tumbling right over the edge. He was enthused about the petrified wood, and he’d gotten new hiking boots.
I was never going to find another guy like him, and I didn’t want to. But because I’d settled for someone in the first place, I’d ruined my chances with him.
He’d make someone a good partner someday. Whoever had broken up with him and tanked the company they were building together was likely an awful person. Now it was clear she was an idiot.
He lowered his arm, and our gazes collided. The depth of emotion staring back at me robbed words from my brain. The air sizzled between us so strongly that steam should’ve formed.
“I like your hobby, sweet Clover.” He handed the stone back to me.
“Thank you.” I carefully tucked it back into the dirt. “I’m not a lawbreaker, though.”
“No taking stuff from state parks.” He reiterated an instruction I had discussed with him on the way here.
“I’m not sure if we’re technically in a state park, but I just like finding them.” I rose and stretched my back. “I’ll admire someone else’s work cleaning them.”
“I like that plan.”
“Good. On the way back, you can teach me everything Pokémon.”
“You’re going to regret asking about it.”
“Doubt that.”
“It’s going to sound like I’m speaking a different language when I really get going.”
He could speak gibberish, and that deep voice of his would keep me riveted. “If I get really intimidated, I’ll throw out a geological term to make myself feel better.”
“And then we can each look it up when we get a signal again.”
I laughed, and we started back to our parking spot on the trail. We walked side by side, his hand so close to mine I could feel the heat emanating from him. “I had fun today.”
“Walking in the rain and digging in the mud. You’re an easy date.” His gaze flickered. Was he worried I’d think he meant a real date, and this marriage between us would get more awkward than it was?
“It often scares guys away. Either that or I just give it up.”
“Never give it up. For anyone.” He kept his gaze on the path in front of us. “The right guy won’t ask you to miss out on it just because they don’t like it.”
If I looked too hard into what he said, I’d also worry I thought this was a real date. “I agree and ditto.”
“The only girl who hasn’t laughed at me about Pokémon is you and a buddy’s twelve-year-old daughter who’d come to some tournaments.”
“Then you’re hanging out in the wrong crowd.”
He glanced over, but I couldn’t read the expression in his eyes. “Think I should surround myself with different people?”
“Yes.” Unless that didn’t include me.
Van
After eating dinner at a rustic saloon, we were tucked into our motel room. The rain was heavier than earlier, so we didn’t plan to go out again, and that was just fine with me. I packed my laptop so we could watch movies if we had nothing to do.
We’d watch them from our separate beds.
I bit back my indignation, all aimed at myself. What a time to be responsible.
She was in the shower now, her clothes from earlier folded neatly on the dresser by her luggage. Our ponchos were hanging in the bathroom in case we went out tomorrow, and it was sprinkling again.
Today was fun. Despite the clouds, Clover glowed like the sun shone just for her. She could see a plain, dirty rock and discover a gem, then carefully tuck it back where she found it.
She came out of the bathroom, scrunching her hair with a towel.
She wore loose flannel pajamas with little suns all over them, and her shirt was white with a giant sun in the middle.
Spots of dampness spread from her shoulders.
I couldn’t look farther down than that. There was less forgiveness in the motel room than in the house for errant erections.
Her gaze landed on the laptop I had open on the bed next to me. “Do you have work to catch up on?”
“Nope. I have the movie options up. I can hook this to the TV.”
“Ooh, that’d be great.” She plopped on the bed, and it bounced. This time, I lost the battle of wills and caught a glimpse of her tits jiggling against the fabric. I moved the laptop onto my lap and focused on getting a menu of movies pulled up. “I made a selection of geology movies.”
Her laughter was becoming a favorite part of my night. “Please say you chose Dante’s Peak.”
Pride sang through my blood. “Yes. I did.”
“San Andreas?”
“If you promise to tell me everything they got wrong.” I turned my screen to her. “I’ve also got Gold, Journey to the Center of the Earth, and I would be remiss if I skipped Armageddon.”
“You would be. Who knows more about drilling into asteroids than Ben Affleck?”
“Billy Bob Thornton?”
She threw her covers back and slid between the sheets. “Armageddon it is, but I have to warn you, my knowledge on asteroids is limited, but it likely has silicate materials, ferronickel, or a combo of both.”
“See? I’ve learned something already.”
I drank in the grin she flashed me as she was cozy and tucked in not far from me. I pulled up the movie. Once I got it linked to the TV, I dug out M&M’s from my luggage.
She sat up so fast her covers slipped down. “You have candy!” Smashing her fingers against her lips, she grimaced. “I’m going to get us kicked out.”
“I’ll take the blame.” Gladly, if I could get that reaction from her. I doled out the candy and grabbed a sparkling juice from the fridge.
She wiggled until her back was against the headboard. “This baby is going to get used to late-night junk food gorging.”
“Just fill the bottles with Gatorade. It’ll be fine.”
“Instead of pureed carrots, I’ll just sub it for some butterscotch pudding.”
“Late-night snack of champions.”
She wrinkled her nose but laughed.
I hit play while my mind spun. Being playful like this? Was this how it should be? Joking with her about the baby? What if it was my baby she was pregnant with?
Why couldn’t it be?
I kept my gaze glued to the TV. That question was loaded with so many what-ifs, I couldn’t tackle it.
Clover and I were giving each other a hand, thanks to our vows, but it was never supposed to be about any of that.
If we changed things, it would become complicated.
We had our plan. She was looking for apartments. Divorce papers were getting written up.
Simple.
Easy peasy.
Fucking divorce papers. My fingers twitched to rip them up, and they were likely still a concept on some lawyer’s computer.
We watched the movie, and Clover yawned through the whole thing, slipping farther down in the bed. I mostly paid attention to the screen and not the alluring woman only feet away.
She laid her head on the pillow as the credits rolled. “Sorry, I’m not super exciting tonight. All that fresh air tuckered me out. Must be the first-trimester fatigue.”
We hiked a few miles, and while it was over fairly mild terrain, the weather had been chilly and rainy. I shut the TV off. “Get some rest, Clover. Good night.”
“Night, Van.”
I put my laptop away and shut off the light.
Her steady breathing lulled me, but sleep didn’t come.
I stayed on my back and stared at the dark ceiling.
Clover huffed out a breath and flopped to her other side.
I could make out her curvy outline in the dark, but the more I looked…
the more I looked. Gritting my teeth, I forced my attention back to the dark ceiling. My back began to ache.
I flipped to my side, my back to Clover to keep from taunting myself.
I counted backward from a hundred three times, tensed and relaxed all my muscles until it became its own workout, and inhaled, held, and exhaled my breath until I got lightheaded.
Going through all the tricks, I could not shut my brain off.
Flopping to my back, I huffed out a sigh.
The other bed shifted. “Can’t sleep?”
Aw, hell. I bothered her. “Sorry, did I wake you?”
“No. I thought for sure I’d pass out right away, but I closed my eyes and nothing.”
“Same.”
“Maybe it’s being all alone in this giant bed.”
I chuckled. “A double doesn’t do it for you?”
“Maybe it’s the pillow wall I’m missing. What about you?”
“I don’t know. My mind is whirling. You should’ve made me hike farther.”
“Too much fresh air? Woke you up?”
“Has to be it.”
The fan on the wall unit kicked in, drowning out the few cars that were driving by. Neither of us said anything for a few moments.
“Should I build a pillow wall?” she asked softly.
“I’ve got two for you.”
“What if it’s you I can’t sleep without and not the pillows?”
I stopped breathing. What if it was? What if what she said resonated so hard I nearly jumped out of my bed and into hers?
What if that was the same issue for me? I didn’t have Clover on the other side of the pillow wall.
I didn’t have to work hard not to think about her, so I wasn’t drifting off mentally exhausted.
I didn’t have to worry that the person slumbering next to me had been out with my brother.
I wasn’t ruminating over what it all meant.
“I can move over there,” I offered. Bad idea, but not a suggestion I could take back.
“You don’t mind?”
In a heartbeat. “If you think it’d help.”
There was a pause that nearly stopped my heart. “Okay.”
I rolled out of bed, grabbed all the pillows, and padded to the other side of her bed.
After I got between the sheets, her body heat caressed my legs.
She was much closer than normal, and the warmth seeped through my skin and into my veins.
The two pillows between us did very little to separate us at all.
One kept tipping on me, then on her, and the second fell to the floor when I tried to roll so my back was to her.
“Shit, sorry.” I retrieved it from the floor.
“Do we need it?” Her question was almost tentative.
There would be nothing between us but our clothing, yet I wanted to hurl this damn pillow across the room. I tossed it onto my bed instead. “I promise I’ll be good.”
“That could mean a lot of things, Sullivan Wagner.”
Grinning, I put my back to her to avoid any inappropriate temptation to stare at her in the dark. Her breathing quickly evened out. Within minutes, I was asleep.