Chapter 13
THIRTEEN
Friday, May 10, 2:00 P.M.
Kid-sitting was easy peasy, lemon squeezy. Until it wasn’t.
Valerie was a fun child, full of light and laughter, and uncannily intelligent about the world around her. But like any human, she had shitty moods and sometimes got sulky when she didn’t get her way. The scowl she showed Gus at pickup that afternoon, however, told him something had set her off, and actual dread trickled through him when her teacher, Ms. Jensen, asked for a word.
Gus waited for Valerie to stalk off to a swing set to join the blond and gangly Kenny Baker before he looked at Ms. Jensen.
“Is something wrong?” he asked, trying to quell the urge to squash whoever had made the Bug feel less than awesome. “And should you be talking to Valerie’s dad instead?”
“I will speak with Mr. Walters,” Ms. Jensen said. “But I wanted to talk to you first because an incident happened today that involves you.”
A creeping feeling came over Gus that he already knew what the ‘incident’ might be about.
“The students designed suncatchers today,” Ms. Jensen said, pulling a craft project from the tote bag she wore over one shoulder. It was a heart-shaped frame fashioned from heavy paper, with pieces of brightly colored tape stretched from one side of the frame to the other, filling the empty space like pieces of stained glass. When Ms. Jensen held the heart up to the light, the tape glowed so prettily, Gus had to smile.
“That’s much cooler than the tissue paper flowers I made back in the day.”
“The internet is a wonderful resource,” Ms. Jensen replied with a laugh. “Typically, we allow the children to make two hearts, but Val asked if she could make three. One for her father, one for her uncle, and one for her friend, Super Gus.”
Gus was going to strangle Madoc for bringing that ridiculous nickname into Valerie’s life.
“Please tell me Val didn’t call me that in front of the class.”
“She did.” Ms. Jensen tucked the suncatcher back away. “And that sparked a conversation I should have expected.”
“About my leg.”
“Yes. Some of Val’s classmates used words about your prosthesis and you that she didn’t appreciate. Please remember the children were likely repeating words they heard from adults,” Ms. Jensen added, “but regardless, we don’t allow our students to use slurs or other hateful language.”
Fire blazed up the back of Gus’s neck. “And what did Val say to the kids?”
“A lot about how your prosthesis works and allows you to do your job.” Ms. Jensen smiled. “She had great information to share that I assume came from you and her dad. However, she also told the other kids to shut their pie holes, and that wasn’t so great.”
Gus pressed his lips together against a wild urge to laugh. He loved that, at just six, Valerie had such a clear idea of how she wanted the world to work and wasn’t afraid to say so.
The curly-haired Bug was pretty deflated as they headed out of the schoolyard a few minutes later, however, and Gus’s insides twisted at the understanding that her day had been spoiled simply by knowing him.
“Ms. Jensen told me some of your classmates had opinions about my leg that you didn’t like,” Gus said. “If you want to talk about it, I’m happy to listen.”
Valerie huffed through her nose but then reached up and took Gus’s hand. “Tamberlyn said your leg was ugly and that you shouldn’t wear shorts. And then Liliana said you prob’ly don’t have a job because you’re a freak except that you’re not .” Her face when she looked up at Gus was so miserable he stopped walking and took a knee.
“I’m sorry that happened.” He rubbed Valerie’s upper arms gently. “I get why you didn’t like what the other kids said. Not everyone understands words can change depending on how you use them. Like, if I say I’m a pizza freak, that means I love pizza like crazy. But if someone calls me a freak because I have one leg and not two, it sounds like they think something is wrong with me when there isn’t.”
“I know!” Valerie’s scowl was fierce. “Miz Jensen gave them a talking to but then she said I shouldn’t have told Liliana to shut her big pie hole.”
Somehow, Gus kept a straight face. “I heard about that too.”
“And are you mad or sad ’cause I got in trouble?” Valerie poked her lip out, her eyes abruptly shiny, and her voice got very small. “I bet you are.”
Gus drew her into a careful hug. “I feel a little sad because you’re unhappy, Bug, but I am not mad,” he said. “You did a brave thing speaking up about something that didn’t feel right to you. And, just so you know, Ms. Jensen is going to talk to the parents of those kids about why what they said wasn’t cool.”
Sighing, Valerie slipped her arms around his neck, and Gus adjusted his hold so he could lift her up, sore ribs be damned.
“I don’t think I like Tamberlyn or Liliana anymore,” Valerie said. “They were mean, and they didn’t listen when I tried to explain.”
“Did that make you feel mad or sad?”
“Yes. But I didn’t cry.”
Gus couldn’t help frowning. “It’s okay to cry, Val. Sometimes, it’s what people need to do.”
Valerie set her head on Gus’s shoulder. “I know. But, Gus? I’m kinda hungry. My tummy feels like it’s eating my guts.”
“Gross.” Chuckling, Gus patted her back. “Good thing I know a place to grab snacks!”
He took her across the street to his friend Judah’s yarn shop, and Judah supplied Valerie with wedges of cheddar cheese before suggesting they take Hank the wolfhound to a nearby dog park so Hank could frolick like the world’s largest puppy.
“Dude, Val is so cute .” Judah made puppy eyes of his own at Gus. “How long does this surrogate daddy gig last?”
Gus’s insides wobbled. Surrogate what now?
“Um. I’m just the kid-sitter, Jude, and only until I’m cleared for regular duty. Her mom travels a lot,” Gus said, straight-faced through the white lie, “but Val’s close with the uncle and between him and Mad, they’ll have it covered.”
“Nice.”
Judah’s expression turned thoughtful as he watched Valerie with Hank.
“You know Con’s grandmother raised him, right?” Judah waited for Gus’s nod before he continued. “He wasn’t much older than Val when she took him and his brother in, and he’s always said she was the best parent he could have had. But Con had other people in his life that he counted on too. Teachers and coaches, his brother especially, even though James was still just a kid himself. Having people she can count on—parent-y types like the uncle and you—probably makes Val feel like she has lots of support when her parents can’t be around.”
Biting his lip, Gus glanced back over at Valerie. She didn’t see him as a parent-y type when they’d only known each other for a couple of weeks and he was just the kid-sitter. Valerie was in a much lighter mood by the time they left for home though, and that made Gus feel good too.
“Big Dog Hank was so nice!” Valerie said as they waited for the train at Haymarket Station. “And Mr. Judah. Plus, he had a rainbow pin that said ‘Wicked Proud’. That was for Pride, huh?”
“Yup, it was. Judah’s got a whole collection of pins.”
Valerie swung Gus’s hand. “And the colors are like the ones on your bracelet.”
“That’s right.” Gus swung her hand back. “Do you know what Pride is about?”
“Daddy says it happens when you’re happy with yourself and feel good about who you love. But is Mr. Judah your boyfriend?” Valerie turned a quizzical expression on him. “You hugged it out at the yarn place and then the park and I was just wondering.”
“Friends can hug it out, hon. That’s what Jude is, my very good friend,” Gus said. “His boyfriend’s name is Connor, and he works with your daddy and me.”
“Ah! Then who is your boyfriend?”
“I don’t have one right now. And that works for me.”
Valerie hummed. “I wish you could be Daddy’s boyfriend. You’re nice and smart and you make real good desserts.”
“That’s the sweetest thing anyone has said to me all day, Valley Girl.” Gus smiled down at her. “So, thank you for that.”
Valerie preened. “You’re welcome.”
They boarded the train that arrived and took seats near the door, Valerie swinging her legs. “Gus?” she asked after the doors had slid shut. “Do you want to have a family?”
“I already have a great family,” Gus said with a smile, though instinct told him to tread carefully. “I’ve got my ma and my pops and Donna, plus lots of friends. For some people, friends make the best kind of fam and I’m lucky that I have some of both.”
“Uncle T is my friend and my fam,” Valerie mused. “But I dunno when I’ll see him again.”
“Shouldn’t be long now,” Gus replied, sure the near month that had passed since Tarek’s departure had to feel like an eternity to the Bug. “Your daddy said Tarek would be back as soon as he’s done camping in the middle of nowhere.”
The train pulled into State Street station, passengers walking by Gus and Valerie as they debarked and boarded. Valerie watched them with interest, and the doors were closed again before she looked back up at Gus.
“Do you think Noelene is camping in the middle of nowhere, Gus?”
I think I really hate the questions that don’t have good answers.
Gus cocked his head at Valerie. “Noelene is on a work trip, remember?”
“Yeah. But Daddy said she’s not coming back this time and I think that’s okay for us.”
“I see. Do you miss hanging out with your mom?”
“No. She seems sad all the time.” Valerie frowned. “Uncle T says it’s up to us to make her feel good except I don’t know how.”
Gus regarded brown eyes that were far too knowing for someone so young. “Hon, you’re not responsible for how your mom feels and neither are your daddy or uncle. The only one who can decide how your mom should be feeling is your mom.”
“She feels like work is more fun than me.” The ease with which Valerie spoke stole Gus’s breath. “But that’s because I make the drama nobody wants.”
Gus tipped his head back and forth, pretending he had to consider his words. “I’ve only met your mom once, so I really don’t know her. But I think she cares about what happens to you more than she cares about work.”
“You do?”
“Yup. Because your mom makes sure your daddy is there for you when she isn’t because she knows he’s the person who loves you most in the world and who’ll take the best care of you.”
Valerie said nothing as the train sped along. But she smiled, very small, and put her head on Gus’s arm.
Gus didn’t mind.
His emotions were wobbly though, even hours later after they’d picked up some grocery store cake for that night’s dessert and gotten Princess Lemonade from Gus’s apartment, making sure to first hang up the suncatcher Valerie had made for him. One moment, Gus would be fine, and then he’d think about that heart-shaped piece of paper and colored tape in his window and his eyes would start prickling.
They talked with Madoc over dinner about Valerie’s argument with her classmates, Madoc doing his dad thing while Gus stayed mostly out of it because he knew his place. But when Valerie’s bedtime arrived, she wanted a hug, then took Gus’s face between her hands as she said goodnight. That pure and wonderfully caring gesture—one she so often shared with her daddy—had hit Gus so hard his throat filled with gravel just thinking about it as he stood beside Madoc’s windows, looking out at the cityscape.
“Are you okay?” Madoc asked, stepping up to Gus’s side. “You’ve been kind of quiet tonight.”
Gus gave his partner a small smile. “I can be quiet.”
“I know. But you aren’t, usually.” Setting a hand against Gus’s neck, Madoc furrowed his brow. “I’m sorry you had to deal with Val’s classmates acting shitty about your leg.”
My leg is the least of Val’s worries.
Gus pursed his lips. “I didn’t have to deal with anyone being shitty—that was all Val. And I don’t like knowing people gave her a hard time because of me.”
“I understand. But kids are kids, and sometimes they act like jerks.” Madoc slid his hand down to Gus’s waist. “If it helps at all, I’ll say I’ve learned to follow Val’s lead. As much as I want to jump in and slay all the dragons, there are times that I can’t.”
“Val shouldn’t have to slay anything. She’s just a kid.”
“Yes. But she gave me an idea while we were talking during dinner. You and I could show up after school together on the truck. Give the kids a glimpse of you on the job, so to speak, so they actually see what Val was telling them about your leg not holding you back.”
Gus grinned at his partner. “I love that you’d do that for her.”
“ We would be doing it for the whole class.” Madoc tugged Gus closer. “Teaching them that while you’re different because of your leg, you’re also the same as anyone.”
Gus kissed Madoc deep. He needed to be held tonight. To feel desired. And God, he wanted to see Madoc breathless and begging for more.
Still kissing, they stumbled toward the bedroom, knocking into furniture along the way, and after the door was locked behind them, Gus pinned Madoc against it and palmed him through his joggers.
Madoc tipped his head back with a gasp. “Oh, shit. I … I bought some lube.”
“Did you now?” Gus dropped kisses along Madoc’s jaw. “We’ll have to use it sometime.”
“We can tonight. If you want, I mean.” Madoc ran his hands over Gus’s ass. “I know we haven’t done a lot together?—”
“I love what we do.” Gus drew back and met Madoc’s gaze. “And right now, I want to taste you because I haven’t yet and am dying to.”
He sank to his knees, watching Madoc’s eyes widen, and nosed at Madoc’s dick through the joggers.
Madoc set his hands on Gus’s shoulders and groaned. “Gus.”
Mmm, that throaty murmur did things to Gus. Easing the pants over the bulge tenting Madoc’s boxers, Gus kissed Madoc’s thighs, rubbing his cheeks into the muscles and reveling in the contrast of strength and softness under the coarse hairs.
He pulled the boxers down next, smiling at the shaky sigh that came out of Madoc when his cock was freed, the head already damp and deep red against Madoc’s abdomen. Leaning in, Gus closed his eyes and inhaled soap and musk and man, humming when Madoc cupped the back of Gus’s head with his hand. The sureness of Madoc’s touch sent fire zigzagging down Gus’s spine and damn, his whole body thrummed.
He pressed an open-mouthed kiss against the base of Madoc’s cock, then gripped Madoc’s hips so he could lick and tease Madoc’s hard shaft. He sank into a haze of pleasure as he feasted, soon turning his attention to Madoc’s balls as Madoc babbled softly, voice breaking over his curses.
Forcing his eyes open, Gus found Madoc watching him with an expression so blitzed Gus groaned. He pulled back, wrapping a hand around the base of Madoc’s cock, then slid his lips over the head, reveling in the bitter-salt flavor and heft of the cock on his tongue. He’d always loved giving head and knowing he’d be the first man to do this for Madoc was an incredible turn-on.
He took Madoc deep, opening his throat until his nose brushed the curls of hair on Madoc’s groin, and Madoc’s eyes glazed over, his moaning now constant. He gasped as Gus swallowed around him and his hips bucked forward, driving his cock into Gus’s throat. But Gus was prepared and pressed his weight against Madoc’s thighs to keep him still as he sucked, his own cock straining against the fly on his shorts.
Soon, Madoc was shaking, and the desperation in his voice went straight to Gus’s balls.
“Gonna come,” Madoc whispered. “ Fuck, I’m gonna come so fucking hard.”
Gus slipped a hand under Madoc’s balls, massaging the soft mound of his taint. Triumph flashed through him at Madoc’s keen and Gus didn’t let up, sucking hard as pleasure coiled in his belly.
Inhaling sharply, Madoc went rigid, every muscle drawing impossibly tight for endless seconds before he shuddered and his dick pulsed in Gus’s throat. His eyes blazed blue and beautiful, joy mixed with wonder in them, and he cupped Gus’s face with unsteady hands. When he traced his thumbs over Gus’s lips, gently stroking them as they stretched wide over Madoc’s cock, Gus lost it, right there on his knees, another man’s cock in his mouth while his own went untouched.
Orgasm barreled through Gus and the world around him lost color and faded, leaving just him and Madoc in stark relief. Gus lost the fight to keep his eyes open, aware of his own hoarse moans and that he was clutching Madoc’s thighs. But Madoc was holding on to Gus too, keeping him steady when Gus finally pulled off and pressed his face against Madoc’s leg.
“God.” Panting, Madoc threaded his hands into Gus’s hair. “That was …”
“So fucking good,” Gus mumbled.
He didn’t care that he sounded like a guy whose brain had been blasted to rubble. Or that he had jizz in his pants and was too wrung out to do more than sink down onto his ass with his back pressed against Madoc’s door.
Sliding down beside him, Madoc gathered Gus up. “Did you come?” He pressed his lips to Gus’s temple. “Just from sucking me?”
“Uh-huh.” Peeling an eye open, Gus pulled back and smiled at Madoc’s fiery red cheeks. “Bet you’re feeling proud of yourself.”
Madoc didn’t reply, instead kissing Gus hard, and Gus happily lost himself in it. They probably needed to talk about the things Valerie had said today about Tarek and Noelene. About what was going to happen with this … thing between them once Gus was back on the truck and a new normal shaped their day-to-day.
But just then, all Gus wanted was to be with Madoc and bask in how good they could make each other feel.