Chapter 27
CHAPTER 27
A NNIE
Ten minutes after I called her, Janie pulls up to the curb, jumps out and hugs me tight while I cry on the sidewalk. She doesn’t ask me questions. She doesn’t rush me into the car. Instead, she just holds me and lets me ugly cry. Once my sobs settle enough that I can catch my breath, she helps me into her car and heads toward my house.
“Listen, love,” she says gently, “I’m not sure what happened yet, but I know that you’re not staying at home alone tonight. Let’s go pick up that big chocolate chunk of a dog of yours and you two are going to stay with me tonight.”
I don’t try to argue because, truthfully, I don’t think I can be at home tonight and not be assaulted with memories of Jack. I need to be somewhere that I won’t remember him making love to me and where the pillows don’t smell like him.
When we pull up to the house, Janie comes in with me and takes care of letting Bean out while I get my things packed. I get lost in my thoughts while I’m packing, wondering how I managed to get my heart broken by not one, but two men in less than a year. Maybe I need to give up on love, start knitting and collecting cats to prepare for spinsterhood.
I’m drawn out of my depressing thoughts when my phone rings and I look down and see it’s Jack. I answer, then immediately hang up, not wanting to give him the chance to leave me a voicemail.
A second later, my text message alert dings.
Jack: Annie, please, it’s not what you think. Please pick up and talk to me.
I swipe left on the message and delete it, then change my text messages to “do not disturb” mode.
As Janie walks back upstairs, my phone rings and it’s Jack… again. She looks down at my phone on the table, then up at me. Before I know it, she picks up the phone and answers it, talking before giving Jack a chance to say anything.
“Jack, this is Janie. Don’t speak. I don’t know what happened, but I know my friend is upset and she doesn’t want to talk to you right now. So stand down and give her some damn space.”
Then she hangs up on him. This is what best friends are made of.
A half hour later, we get to her house, and I settle into her guest room and get my pajamas on before going back out to her living room.
“Coffee or wine, babe?” she asks.
“I think it’s a wine kind of night,” I answer, grabbing a tissue to blow my nose.
Once she’s poured us both a generous glass of red, we sit on the couch under a giant comfy blanket. I tell her all about how Jack broke my heart tonight. I also tell her about how I ended up calling her from some random street corner because Joel was being a jerk.
“I’m so sorry, Annie. I wish I had something to say that would make it better. I mean, we knew Joel was a wanker, but Jack…” She frowns. “Give me your phone. I’m going to screen your calls and texts for you, so you aren’t tempted to answer him. You’re not in a state of mind for that right now.”
I sniffle and hand my phone over to her, agreeing I probably can’t be trusted with it right now.
“I’m so tired. Do you mind if we head to sleep now?” I ask, wiping my tears.
“Of course not. We can talk more in the morning if you want.”
She walks me to the guest room and, like a doting mother, tucks me in under the huge fluffy comforter. When she’s about to close the door on her way out of the room, I speak up, “Janie… thanks for everything tonight. Love you.”
“No need to thank me, Annie. This is what best friends do for each other. Love you, too.”
When I wake up the next morning, my eyes hurt. Each time I blink, they rebel in irritation. I assume it’s from all the crying I did last night and into this morning.
I get up and go to the bathroom, then follow the scent of cinnamon to the kitchen. Janie’s made us her delicious French toast and coffee, and we take our plates out to her sunroom to eat.
“Have you thought about maybe taking some time off of work?” she asks. “It’s been a rough few weeks with Teddy, the whole Sadie situation, and now this. I could keep Bean for the week and maybe you could get a last-minute deal on a spa week or a cruise or something. Somewhere off the grid where only your sister and I know how to reach you,” she explains.
“Gosh, it would be amazing to get away from here… but I could never do something like that. I’m not that spontaneous. I wouldn’t even know where to start,” I answer.
“It’s never too late to change.” She smiles and winks at me.
Before I know it, two hours have passed, and I’ve texted my boss and gotten a week off work. Janie has helped me book a five-day Caribbean cruise leaving out of Florida the day after tomorrow. I’ve got a flight to Florida later today with a full spa day scheduled tomorrow at the hotel I’ll stay at for the next two nights. It pays to have a best friend who is fearless and spontaneous, apparently.
My flight isn’t for four hours so Janie drops me off at home. I hug her and Beanie goodbye and assure Janie I’m fine to get an Uber to the airport after I pack.
Janie promises she’ll let all our friends know that I’m somewhere secret but safe for the next week, so they don’t worry about me. We agree that I’ll take my work phone with me, and I make sure she and Kelly have that number. This way I can leave my personal phone off except for when, and if, I want to check messages, but Kelly and Janie can reach me in emergencies.
Once I’m packed, I head down to the porch with my bags and order my Uber. I knock on the DePaul’s door to let them know I’ll be heading out for a week.
Julie answers and her face softens when she sees it’s me. Her expression fills with concern. “Hey, Annie, Jack was here this morning looking for you. He looked… rough. Is everything ok?” she asks.
Not having the energy to get into everything, I force a smile.“Everything is fine. But I’m going away on a last- minute vacation. I’ll be gone about a week. I don’t want you to worry.”
“Oh, okay.” She narrows her focus on my eyes and I’m sure she can tell I’ve been crying. “Just call if you need anything. We’ll get your mail.”
She reaches out and draws me into a hug just as my Uber pulls up.
I clear my throat, forcing back more tears. “Thank you,” I manage to squeak out before I turn, grab my bags, and walk to the waiting vehicle.
My Uber pulls up and I load my bags in and buckle up. My text messages are still on “do not disturb” but I decide to check them one more time before I shut off my phone for the week.
I sigh when I look down and see the number of messages.
Joel: Hope you’re not still mad at me, just trying to be a friend.
Jack: Annie, please talk to me. Let me just explain.
Jack: I love you. I wouldn’t do that to you.
Jack: I’ve been a mess and an ass. I don’t deserve to explain everything from the last few weeks, but please let me.
Jack: Please, Annie.
Ben: Are you okay? Fitz called and told me what happened…
Shayna: Annie, what can I do? What do you need? Ben told me what happened.
Jack: Where are you? I was just at your house and you’re not home. It’s 7am… Did you not sleep at home???
Janie: I just dropped you off at home, just testing that you aren’t checking text messages…
Jack: Please, Annie. Call me, I’m worried about you.
Janie: I mean it! Quit checking your messages! I love you, babe.
I decide the only way I’m going to get any peace between now and when I board my flight—and not wanting my friends to worry—I send a quick text message to Ben and Shayna so I can turn my phone off.
Me: I’m okay. I can’t talk about it right now. I’m leaving town for a bit. I’m safe. Janie knows how to reach me in a genuine emergency. My phone will be off. I hope we can remain friends even though things are over with Jack and me.
JACK
I pace back and forth, nearly losing my mind that Annie has returned none of my texts or calls. I have to explain to her I would never intentionally hurt her. Though how I can expect to convince her to believe me after what a distant prick I’ve been these last two weeks, I’m not sure.
There’s a knock on my door, and then I hear someone letting themself in. Gracie’s wagging her tail, so I know it’s no one to be alarmed about. When I look up, Ben’s walking in the door.
“Jesus, you look like hell,” he says.
“Screw you,” I answer, halfheartedly. “I had a shitty night. ”
“Yeah, I heard all about it. What the hell, man? This isn’t you,” he continues.
“I didn’t do what she thinks, I just have to explain?—”
“Brother, it’s not just last night… It’s all of it. You’ve drunk more in the last two weeks than you literally have in all the last five years combined. You leave your girlfriend after Teddy’s funeral and don’t even tell her you’re leaving. And Chelsea…? Shit, I don’t even know where to start on that one,” he says, sounding pissed at me.
“My friend di—” I start, raising my voice now.
“Yes, Teddy died—” he interrupts me. “And it’s sad and fucking tragic. It really is. But do you really think you’re honoring him by trying to self-destruct? Is that what he said he wanted you to do in his letter? Because that doesn’t sound like Teddy!” he yells.
“I don’t know,” I answer, not able to look him in the eye.
“What do you mean you don’t know?” he challenges me. “What did he say?”
“I don’t know,” I hesitate. “I haven’t read his letter yet.”
Ben just stares at me now, stunned silent, his mouth hanging open. After several moments, he shakes his head.
“You’re torturing yourself with guilt—and don’t say you aren’t because I know you—then you blow up your relationship, and you haven’t even read the damned letter yet?” His tone is incredulous.
“My relationship isn’t blown up!” I snap at him.
Ben sits down then. He looks up at me and says, “Jacky, she texted Shayna and me today to say that it’s over and she hopes we can stay friends,” he says. “And?—”
“It’s not over,” I answer. “It can’t be… I just have to go see her before she gets in her own head too much and I’ll explain things. She’ll understand. She has to.”
“Jack, you can’t do that,” he says quietly .
“Don’t tell me what I can do. It’s my relationship,” I snarl at him.
“Jack, I’m sorry, but I mean you literally can’t do that… She’s… she’s gone,” he says.
And with those two words, my world collapses in around me.