Chapter Twenty-Eight
Cole
Reed was silent on the way back to my place from the hospital.
He sat in the back of my father’s car, his bag perched on his lap as I held his hand.
I occasionally squeezed his fingers, and he smiled at me, his brown eyes somber.
I felt like this was bigger than whatever happened between us.
Like there was something he hadn’t told me.
And I intended to get the truth out of him.
I didn’t care how long it took. I would wait forever if that’s what I had to do.
“We can come in. If you need help,” Dad told me when he opened the door. “I know you’re tired and probably just want to rest.”
I nodded. The doctor said I should be all right to play tomorrow night as long as I didn’t do anything stupid. His words, not mine.
“I shouldn’t be. All I did was sleep at the hospital, but I really just want to lie down.”
“Do you want us to help you?” Dean asked.
I shook my head. “I think I’ll be okay.” I climbed from the car and hugged my father tightly, then did the same with Dean, holding on longer than I should have. “Thank you,” I whispered.
Dean gave me a quick nod. “We’re just glad you’re okay.”
“Call us if you need anything.” Dad brushed the hair from my forehead. “That goes for you, too, Reed. We’re here for you.”
Reed gave a shy smile. “Thank you. I appreciate that.”
He still wouldn’t look at me, and I hated that. Didn’t we have a moment earlier? Didn’t he tell me he still loved me, and we were going to try to work things out? Had he changed his mind on the car ride home? Was there someone back in New York waiting for him that he hadn’t told me about?
“Let’s go inside, baby.” I reached for Reed’s hand, relaxing when he let me link our fingers together.
“I want you to text me every hour,” Dean called out as we headed toward the house. “I mean it!”
I chuckled as I waved at them. “Will do.” I had no intention of doing that, but I wanted to make my dads happy.
“Reed! Make sure he texts us!” Dad added.
Reed giggled softly as he squeezed my hand, and my body lit up like the sun. I could listen to him laugh for the rest of my life. It meant Reed was happy. That he was here with me.
“I will,” he called over his shoulder.
Once we were inside my house and standing in the kitchen, I looked at Reed, who gave me a nervous smile.
“Hi.” I murmured. I touched his face lightly with the tips of my fingers. “Have I told you how beautiful you are?”
“I haven’t even showered...Oh.” Reed gasped when I pressed him against the counter. He raised his chin to look at me, his dark brown orbs searching my face. “Didn’t the doctor tell you to rest? Which includes sex. You have a game tomorrow night.”
“Who said anything about sex, baby?” I dragged my nose over his jawline and down his neck. “Fuck, I missed you.” I canted my hips so he could feel how much.
Reed let out a soft whimper. “What if Oscar’s home?”
“He’s not. There was practice this afternoon.”
“But what if he comes back?”
I pulled away. “Baby, I’m not planning on fucking you on the kitchen floor. It’s just a kiss. And maybe some frotting.” I reached down to cup his ass with my palm.
“Yes, yes, that.” Reed’s fingers tugged at the button on my pants.
I hummed softly. “Take me out, baby. Stroke me.” I kissed his salty skin. “That’s it.” My eyes rolled back when Reed’s hand wrapped around my cock. “Good boy.”
“Jesus Christ, where was this dirty mouth when we first met?” Reed nipped at my chin.
My brows dipped. “Do you hate it?”
I wasn’t about to tell him I was no longer the nervous, shy boy he’d spent that summer with. What I did behind closed doors was no one’s business. Not even Reed’s.
“No, Casanova, I love it.” And then he dropped to his knees, taking my pants with him. He moaned softly as he licked my tip before he gripped the base. “I missed your cock.”
I looked down to find Reed watching me with darkened eyes. “Just my cock?”
“I mean, I missed all of you, but this...” He kissed my shaft. “This dick is something else.”
“Well, don’t just stare at it, baby. Why don’t...Fuck!” I tangled my fingers in his blond tresses as he swallowed me whole. “That’s it. Take the whole thing. Fuck yes.”
Reed groaned around me, his hands digging into the back of my thighs.
He looked up, maintaining eye contact as he worked me over, even when tears slid down his cheeks and drool pooled from his lips.
I couldn’t help myself. I fucked his pretty little mouth, and when I grew close to coming, I yanked away, pulled Reed back to his feet, and slammed my lips over his.
“Please, Cole,” he whimpered.
I bit down on his bottom lip. “Please, what, baby?”
“I need to come.” He gazed at me with lust-filled eyes.
I yanked his white shorts down to his thighs. “Then fucking come for me.” I spat in my hand. “You, too.” I raised my palm, and Reed’s saliva joined mine. I wrapped my fist around both of us, and his eyes fluttered close. “Look at me.”
Reed’s body trembled. “I’m going to come.
I can’t stop it. Fuck!” He gasped out just as I felt the splatter of cum against my hand.
I quickly joined him, moaning Reed’s name as I did.
I scooped up our release and shoved into his mouth.
He eagerly licked it from my fingers, nipping and sucking on them as I fed him more.
Fuck, he was so perfect for me. He was my soulmate.
“Jesus.” Reed dropped his forehead to my shoulder.
I inhaled the familiar scent of his apple shampoo. “Let’s go take a shower, and then we’re going to talk.”
“Okay, yeah. I think that’s a good idea.” Reed gave me a smile as I led him upstairs.
AFTER OUR SHOWER, WHERE I pushed Reed against the wall and rubbed my dick between his crease until we both came again, I watched him as he dried off his soft, pale skin with one of my expensive towels.
Oscar had insisted we buy them, even though they cost way too much money.
I was fine with shopping at Target, but Oscar wouldn’t have it.
And now, as Reed oohed and aahhed over how nice they were, I was glad my friend had put his foot down. He rarely did.
“This towel is made out of clouds, isn’t it?” Reed wrapped it around his thin frame. He was thinner than I remembered. He looked nearly emaciated. Worry tangled inside my head as I wondered why. When he turned to look at me, the smile on his face disappeared.
“What’s wrong? Do you feel okay?”
I sighed. “Are you okay?” I held up a hand to stop him from interrupting. “I don’t want a bullshit excuse, baby. I want the truth.”
“I’m fine.” Reed huffed and turned his back on me while he dug around in the bag Zach had put together.
He pulled out a few tubes and bottles and began to cleanse his face.
“Why? Is there something wrong with the way I look now? You never had a problem before.” He spun around to stare at me, ice in his gaze.
I took a step forward. “You’re too thin.”
“Oh, fuck off. This is how dancers look.”
“When was the last time you ate something? An entire meal, not just a nibble here and there.”
Reed’s nostrils flared. “I’m not having this discussion with you. It’s none of your business.”
I watched in shock as he stomped into my bedroom, and when he slammed the door, I rushed after him. I burst through the door to find Reed pulling his shirt over his head.
“It is my business. I love you, and I don’t want you to hurt yourself to achieve your dreams.”
“This is not your business, Cole!” Reed exclaimed. He shoved his feet into his shoes and tried to push past me. “Let me go.”
I shook my head. “Stop trying to run away from me. I only want to talk to you. To make sure the man I’m desperately in love with stays healthy enough to spend forever with me.”
“That’s...That’s not fair,” Reed whispered.
I pushed the hair back from his forehead. “Baby, just talk to me. If you’re starving yourself for ballet, we can get you help. You don’t have to do that to dance. You—”
“Stop it!” Reed’s eyes shimmered with tears. “You don’t know anything about me. I’m not nineteen years old anymore, Casanova. And you can’t save someone who doesn’t want to be saved! There is nothing wrong with me!”
I cupped his head between my hands. “Baby, you deserve to be saved. Don’t you see that? You’re fucking perfect just the way you are. You don’t need to shove yourself into some sort of bubble and conform to what others think is beautiful. You already are.”
“I can’t do this.” Reed ducked under my arm.
I tried to grab him again, but he was faster than I anticipated. Running down the hallway and the stairs. If he didn’t drop his bag, I might have missed him. He tried to shrug me off as I wrapped my arms around his waist and pulled him flush against me.
“Baby, stop.”
“Stop it! Stop calling me that! I’m not perfect, and I have never been. But you, mister famous hockey player. You have everything you ever wanted. You didn’t give up everything like I did,” Reed sobbed. Tears streamed down his face.
My heart cracked against my ribs. “You were missing from my life, Reed.”
“If you were so in love with me, if you missed me so much, why did you fuck Fiona?” He angrily brushed the tears from his cheeks. His entire face fell. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have said that.”
I released him as my blood boiled. “Did you expect me to remain celibate while you fucked every available male in New York?”
“I...Fuck you!” Reed pushed at my chest. “I’m not a slut, Cole.
You can’t make me feel bad for having sex when we weren’t together.
It didn’t matter. I pretended they were you.
Every single one of them. They all had your fucking eyes, your fucking smile, your fucking everything.
It was never enough. I saw you when I was sleeping.
When I was awake. You were everywhere, even when you weren’t.
And then I had to watch you fall in love with someone else in front of the world. ”
Everything inside of me suddenly hurt. “It wasn’t like that. I never loved Fiona.”
“Could have fooled me. All those posts and pictures together. The heart emojis and winky faces. It. Broke. Me.”
“You left me! You let me confess how I felt about you and then you disappeared. Ignored all my messages and texts. Never answered my calls! What was I supposed to do? I tried to move on!”
Reed’s chin quivered. “I wanted you to live your dream. I couldn’t stand the thought of you giving it up for me. And you are. You’re about to win a championship. You have a house, and you’re a huge star.”
“I wanted you, Reed. You were my dream. You have no idea how depressed I got after that. I didn’t get out of bed for days. Refused to eat or speak to my parents. I wanted to...” I shook my head. I had never shared that with anyone. No one knew how dark things got for me when Reed left me.
He reached up to stroke his palm over my cheek. “You wanted to what, Casanova?” Tears slipped down his cheeks as he waited for my answer.
“I wanted to die, okay? I wanted to die because I loved you so much, and you just threw me away like dirty trash!” I choked out. “I hated myself and everyone else for being happy when I was so fucking angry and sad.”
Reed’s brows shot up as his eyes went wide. “Cole.”
“I need you to leave,” I murmured. But he didn’t move. “I’m serious. I need you to go home now, okay? I just...I just need a moment to get my shit together.”
Reed stared at me, fresh tears on his face. “Okay.”
And then he was gone, leaving me alone to sob like a baby in the kitchen.