16. Tucker
Chapter 16
Tucker
I pushed her too far.
The night had been going so well that I was lulled into a false sense of security and grew too bold. All the progress we’d made—or at least, I thought we’d made—was wiped out as I chased her across the ranch with everyone close to us bearing witness.
Bex disappeared from sight as she ran inside the barn. I slowed my steps, needing to take a few deep breaths before I faced her and owned up to my mistake. But even that wasn’t enough to make my heart rate settle, knowing how badly I’d fucked up.
Stepping through the open door, I found her curled up in front of Chocolate Chip’s stall, her face buried in her knees hugged tightly to her chest. The horse could sense its owner’s distress and let out a high-pitched whinny. Bex flinched at the sound but didn’t lift her head.
Restless, not knowing what to do or how to fix this, I cursed under my breath and began to pace.
“Fuck, I messed this all up,” I muttered, my hands tugging on the strands of my hair in frustration .
“Tucker.” She uttered my name so softly I almost didn’t hear it over the buzzing in my ears.
My head snapped up, and the anguish written in her eyes about damn near shattered my heart.
I made a move toward her but stopped after half a step, holding myself back for fear of making this worse. The initials I’d written on her cast taunted me from across the open space.
What the hell had I been thinking, not asking her first if that was okay?
Gesturing toward the thick plaster encasing her right forearm, I offered, “If you want, first thing in the morning, I can add an extra layer to cover that up.”
Bex’s eyes dipped to the letters, but she remained silent.
“I’m sorry. I thought—” I shook my head. “I don’t know what I thought. It was impulsive; I got carried away. It was stupid, I know—”
“It wasn’t stupid.”
“What?” I wasn’t sure I’d heard her correctly.
“I said it wasn’t stupid.” Bex pushed off the concrete floor and walked toward me, only stopping when there was barely six inches of space between us. “These past few days . . .” She heaved a sigh so heavy it shook her entire body. “They’ve been a lot. I came down here intending to put my head down and focus on my best friend getting married, but instead, my entire life got flipped upside down. It can’t come as a surprise that I’d need a minute to process that.”
My fingers twitched, desperate to pull her into my arms, but I could respect that she needed space to get this off her chest, so I stuffed them into my pockets.
“Tucker, you were my whole world. There aren’t even words to express the gut-wrenching pain that resulted from thinking that you didn’t want me. That everything about our relationship—your promises, your love—had been a lie. That I was only a placeholder until you found someone better.”
Her words were like a thousand tiny cuts to my heart, each one enough to make me bleed but not enough to put me out of my misery and finish me off.
Bex huffed out a wry laugh. “Only to find out that nothing was as it seemed. That we’d lost those years together at the hands of another.” She closed her eyes briefly before reopening them. “Do you know how many nights I stared up at the sky, praying a shooting star would pass by so I could make a wish? Which was a fool’s errand living first in LA and then in Chicago, where it’s damn near impossible to see the stars. Though it was symbolic in a way, because it was foolish to hope that what I planned to wish for would ever come true.”
Unable to hold my tongue a moment longer, I dared to ask, “What did you want to wish for, Bex?”
She closed the gap between us, looping her arms around my neck. My lungs seized, too afraid to breathe for fear that she might pull away if I did.
“To wipe the slate clean. To forget the past and have another chance with the only man I’ve ever loved.”
My hand came up to cup her cheek, the thumb grazing over the softness of her skin. She leaned into my touch, her eyes sliding closed on a shaky exhale.
Swallowing thickly, I rasped, “Let me grant your wish.”
Lashes fluttering, she lifted her gaze to meet mine. In those beautiful brown eyes, I saw my future—the one I’d thought long lost.
I pressed my forehead to hers. “Tell me you want this. I mean, really want this. I don’t want to be your rebound.”
Fingers skated up the sides of my neck, leaving goosebumps in their wake. With two hands gripping my face, Bex forced it back enough that I could view hers. “Every man who has come after you until now has been a rebound for me, Tucker. And guess what? None of them helped me get over you. It was pointless even trying.”
There was barely enough time to register the deep meaning of those words before she rose on her toes and pressed her lips to mine. My grip on her tightened, my groan involuntary as I got a taste of the woman I loved for the first time in over a decade.
Bex slid her hands into my hair, her nails scraping against my scalp, causing me to hiss at the bite of pain. She used that as an opportunity to slide her tongue inside my mouth to tangle with mine. Gone was the timid girl I’d once known who had always let me lead. In her place was a woman who knew exactly what she wanted, with plans to take it.
Our mouths were fused together like we were trying to steal each other’s air, our tongues stoking the flames of our desire for reconnection until it threatened to consume us. Bex shoved at my shoulders, walking me backward until my back hit a wall. I spun our positions instantly, my hands anchoring on the back of her thighs and lifting until she’d wrapped them around my waist.
My cock was straining against the fabric of my pants, seeking her out, desperate to feel her from the inside—a pleasure I’d never known. With her body pinned, legs spread wide, I fit myself against her core, and the heat of it nearly had me blowing my load.
Bex tore her lips away on a moan as my hips bucked, desperate for friction, but it wasn’t enough. I needed more.
But I’d be damned if our first time was quick and dirty in a barn. I wanted to take my time with her, commit to memory what made her moan, gasp, and eventually, scream.
Though that didn’t mean I planned to leave her unsatisfied .
I pressed wet, openmouthed kisses down the column of her neck as I unhooked her legs from around my waist, setting her feet on solid ground.
“Tucker.” Her breathy voice went straight to my dick, the throbbing there bordering on unbearable.
Lifting my head, I drank in the sight of her flushed face and lust-glazed eyes. Her breasts heaved with each ragged breath she took, the pulse at the base of her throat fluttering wildly.
She was breathtaking, and she was all mine. Time and distance might have kept us apart, but our bond was unbreakable. I was firmly convinced of that—now more than ever.
Slowly, I sank to my knees before her, never once breaking eye contact. My hands skated up her bare legs beneath her sundress. When I reached mid-thigh, Bex’s breathing hitched, and I paused. If she told me to stop, I would, no questions asked. But I prayed with all my might that she wouldn’t. I wanted to bring her pleasure, to remind her of how good we were together, even if we’d never breached that final barrier.
“Please.” I wasn’t above begging. “Need to see if you taste as sweet as I remember.”
She gave me the slightest dip of her chin, giving me permission to bury my face between her thighs.
Thank fucking God.
I shifted my touch higher, hooking my fingers into the waistband of her panties and dragging them down her silky-smooth legs. When they reached her ankles, she lifted each foot in turn, allowing me to remove them and bring them to my nose.
Inhaling her scent—one that had been imprinted on my brain as a teen—caused memories to flood my system along with a rush of heat as my arousal reached a fever pitch .
The first time she let me slip my hand down her pants and feeling how wet she became.
The first time she let me put my mouth on her pussy, letting me explore until I learned how to pleasure her.
The first time I saw her completely naked, and I spent hours memorizing every bare inch of her skin.
There were so many firsts yet to be had, but I wasn’t about to get ahead of myself. This moment in time was a gift, one I had no intention of wasting because I got too hung up on trying to put the cart before the horse. Tonight was a baby step, and if I had my say, we’d keep taking them, one at a time, until we reached the desired destination.
Pretty sure being able to keep my eye on the prize when lust took over my brain was my hidden strength at this point. How else did you explain a nineteen- and twenty-year-old boy being able to turn down the chance at sex when his girlfriend had not only been laid naked before him but had begged to be fucked?
Not sure if I could chalk it up to being sensible or stupid. All I know was that I’d wanted my ring on her finger first.
I wasn’t delusional enough to believe that it would be a precursor this go around if she gave me the green light. We had a lot of work to do before we found ourselves back in a place where we discussed the future.
Right now, it was within my power to make her feel good, so that’s what I was going to do.
Pocketing her panties, I raised the hem of her dress, inching it up slowly and delighting in the sounds of her breathing growing choppier the higher I went. When the last bit of fabric hiding the treasure between her thighs was pulled away, I couldn’t stop the loud groan that rumbled up from my chest. She was bare and glistening, ready to be devoured .
Knotting her skirt to keep it out of my way, I lowered my face for that first taste. It had been so damn long that coming in my pants while I performed oral became a genuine concern.
Fuck it. If it happened, it happened. Tonight was for her. I wouldn’t be asking her to reciprocate anyway.
Anchoring my hands on her ass, I nudged her feet apart with my knee. Her wedges put her at the perfect height, and my tongue darted out to drag a path through her slit.
Goddamn. She was sweet and tangy and one hundred percent Bex.
Her moan split the air, accompanied by the sound of her head dropping back against the wall.
Encouraged by her response, I circled her clit with the tip of my tongue, teasing her but not giving in to what I knew she really needed. Her needy whines reached my ears, and I smiled against her slick flesh.
Bex’s hand tangled in my hair and forced my face closer, silently demanding more. Wanting her on edge but not frustrated, I flicked that swollen bud rapidly, knowing it drove her wild.
“Fuck, you’ve always been so good at this.”
Her breathy words had my ego swelling. It sounded like I’d set the bar so high that no man she’d been with since had been able to reach it.
Good. If I was the best at going down on her, my chances of being the best fuck of her life got even better. I already knew she would be the best of mine, no contest.
Time ceased to exist as I lost myself in the taste of the woman I loved. Her arousal coated my lips, dripping down my chin as she drew closer to climax. My hips rocked, humping the air as my cock wept in desperate need of relief.
When her thighs began to tremble, signaling she was right on the edge, I wanted to feel it when she came. Since my cock wasn’t getting in on the action, I allowed my fingers to have the honor. Bex cried out above me when I shoved two deep inside, her pussy rippling around the digits before clamping down.
I kept up my oral assault, drawing out her orgasm. For a minute, I thought I could ramp her up to a second one, but those fingers tangled in my hair wrenched me away.
Sitting back on my heels, I gazed up at the goddess above me. Her skin was covered in a sheen of sweat, one breast had been freed from her bodice, indicating she must’ve been playing with it while I pleasured her, and her brown curls were a mess.
Freshly fucked looked good on my girl. Always had.
The taste of her as I licked my lips only made the moment sweeter.
Our harsh breathing was the only sound in the empty barn, and eventually, her lashes lifted and she peeked down at me, the flush on her cheeks deepening. “So, um, that just happened.”
Husky laughter vibrated through my chest, causing Bex to sink her teeth into her lower lip to bite back a smile.
“Not what I expected when I chased you in here, but I can’t say I’m sorry. That was better than I remember.”
There was the tiniest twitch at the corner of her mouth. “Yeah, it was for me too.”
My hands reached out to unknot her skirt, allowing the fabric to fall over her legs.
“Any chance I can get my underwear back?”
“Nope.”
She hummed. “Figured as much.”
When I stood, I caged her in against the rough stall door at her back. The brown eyes that stared back at me were glassy, glazed over with the lust still swirling around us, even though I’d already made her come .
Bex sucked in a sharp breath when I dragged a thumb over the stiff peak of her exposed nipple. “This was a pleasant surprise.” I tugged the fabric of her dress up until she was covered. “Kills me to know I missed the show. Definitely won’t make the mistake of not looking up a second time.”
Her throat bobbed on a swallow, but she remained silent.
Ducking my head, I teased my nose along the side of hers. Against her lips, I murmured, “Come home with me.”
The sigh she let out fanned my face. “Tuck.”
My eyes slammed shut. She’d used the shortened version of my name a few times since her return home, but I hadn’t allowed myself to believe there was any meaning behind it because I thought any chance of reconnection was hopeless. Now, that single syllable held so much promise, like it could actually lead us where we were always meant to go.
“It’s probably not a good idea . . .” The uncertainty in her voice threatened to shatter any illusion of making progress after what we’d just shared.
We might’ve gotten carried away with emotions and tension running high, but she meant so much more to me than a quick fuck “for old times’ sake.”
I’d failed her once. I would be damned if I let that happen again.
Pulling back enough that she could view my face, I needed her to see the sincerity of my words when I spoke. “Bex, the other night with my back against a tree and my ass in the dirt was the best I’ve slept in years. Because you were in my arms. If you let me take you home, all I want is to hold you until the sun comes up.” Her mouth parted as she blinked up at me, so I added, “Please.”
Instead of answering, she lifted a hand to swipe her thumb across the slickness of her arousal still coating my chin. “You’ve got a little something there. ”
Damn, this temptress. I was trying to do the right thing, and she was deliberately trying to push me over the edge.
Two can play at this game.
My hand snaked out to clasp around her wrist. With no way to escape my hold, she was forced to watch on as I sucked that shiny thumb into my mouth, my tongue teasing the tip as I had done to her clit while I lapped up every last trace of her flavor.
Bex’s eyes flared, and her breathing grew shallow again.
Lightning-quick, I used my free hand to tangle in the dark tresses at the nape of her neck, drawing her head back. Sliding her thumb past my lips with an audible pop, I dropped my grip on her wrist and her arm fell, the palm of her hand smacking the rough wood at her back when it made contact.
My mouth crashed down on hers, my tongue diving deep so she would have no choice but to taste herself. I swallowed her whimpers as my hips surged forward, my hard cock rubbing against her softness. Her nails scraped along my back as her touch ventured lower, her palms flattening over my ass and pulling me closer. Bex didn’t need words; her actions practically screamed her desperation for us to be joined.
If I didn’t stop soon, there was a very real chance I would do something we’d both regret in the morning.
My throbbing dick screamed in protest, but my brain won out, and I eased off, nipping her lower lip one last time before pulling away.
“Just sleeping tonight.” I panted out the words.
Bex offered me the tiniest smile, and her fingers tangled with mine. “Okay.”
One baby step down, about a million more to go.