Chapter 24
“Calm down.” Maddy looks scared as she stands in front of me to stop me pacing. The whole club is staring at me as if they expect me to have some kinda answer to all this. I can’t think straight because all I can hear is Ella and Dylan sobbing, and all I can picture in my head is how defeated Jimmer looked when he got in the back of that patroller.
“How can I be calm? Our president just got arrested and he wouldn’t let me do shit about it,” I remind her, my chest is pounding and my head is throbbing from all the answers it’s trying to find.
“It’s happened before. We can get him out. Alex is already on the phone to Monica, she’ll know how to fix this.” Maddy does her best to soothe me but it don’t fuckin’ work, all I wanna do right now is find those officers that took him and beat the hell outta them.
“What have they got, and why did they just take him? You saw what I did to that officer, that was assault, I should have been cuffed up and taken in with him. Prez goes nowhere alone.” The fury is building higher inside me and when I look across to the barstool where Troj is sitting, I can see it’s eating him up too. He’s trying to breathe himself calm, his fists are tensed tight and his eyes are focused on the door like he’s about to charge through it.
“Jessie, right now you have to be a leader. You have to think about what Prez would do.”
“Did ya see the look on his face, Mads? It was weak, he let ‘em take him without a fight. I knew that bitch would screw us, she put us all in Long Beach at the time of that bust so she could fuckin’ screw us.” I throw my fist into one of the huge pillars beside me, and Maddy takes my shoulder and kisses it gently as the pain wracks up through my arm.
“Jessie, you can’t fall apart right now. You need to figure this out. I’ll do some research into Consuela. I can tap into the government system and see what charges they got him on, we’ll fix this,” she promises. I wanna believe her. I wanna believe her so bad that I nod my head and try to convince myself that it’s all gonna be okay. She’s right, someone has to take control. Someone has to do something and since I’m this club’s VP, that someone right now, is me.
“Thorne, organize for that vestry to be cleared, chances are those fuckers are gonna be back here with a warrant and I don’t want ‘em findin’ jack shit.” I switch my brain to focus on the here and fuckin’ now and give him his orders.
“On it, Jess.” He nods his head and sets to work, rounding up Storm, Hayden, and Skid and heading out to the yard.
“Alex, you understand this arrest process better than anyone. You speak to Monica.” I look to Squealer’s old lady, next.
“I already spoke to her, she’s working on it,” she assures me. “But I’ll keep her updated with everything Maddy finds out.”
“Okay.” I nod my head as I try to pull together some kinda plan. Prez would know what to do if he were here, which makes me wonder why he gave me no fuckin’ heads up on this.
I walk across the room to where Nyx is trying his best to console Ella and when he sees me coming, he moves out the way so I can crouch in front of her.
“We’re gonna get him back. I promise.” I take both her trembling hands in mine. “He’s been in worse scenarios than this, most of us here have had our rights read to us, it don’t mean jack. Monica’s the best attorney in the state and we got plenty of people on the inside.”
“Then why do you look so scared?” She looks up at me, with wide, tear-filled eyes, and suddenly it strikes me that she’s right. I am fuckin’ scared. “We’ll get him back,” I repeat, standing up and patting Dylan’s head before I move away to speak to Troj.
“I need to get in, it’s my job to protect him. All kindsa fuckers are locked away in county, and you can bet half of ‘em want him dead.”
“That was my initial plan Troj, you saw the attempt I made, and how it was ignored. That was no ordinary arrest. No one is goin’ anywhere, right now. My sister needs ya, you can’t go gettin’ yourself locked up. Besides, I don’t know what this is yet. Drug charges? C’mon.” I screw my face up. “If that was the case we should have all left here in cuffs. There’s somethin’ about this Consuela woman that I don’t fuckin’ like.”
“Jess,” Alex interrupts. “That was Monica, she called the sheriff’s office and asked to speak to her client.”
“Don’t fuckin’ tell me he refused her.” I scrub my hand over my forehead because after what’s just happened, nothin’ else today could surprise me.
“No, he didn’t refuse her, he wasn’t there. There”s no record of his arrest at all. As it stands, Jimmer Carson hasn’t been taken into custody anywhere in this state. He’s a free man.”
“Mads.” I turn to my old lady and despite all her attempts of reassurance, I see how scared she is. “I need ya to get me Consuela’s number,” I tell her.
* * *
I cut the engine of my bike when I get to the address Consuela gave me, and I take a minute to absorb my surroundings. This ain’t like no jail I’ve ever seen, it’s far too barren, and it only proves that I’m right to have my doubts. There’s a guard standing at a side door that leads into one of the one-story buildings, and I can’t help wonderin’ what the hell Prez has gotten himself into.
“Jessie Donavon.” I give my name to the guard, who says nothing in response, just turns his body and types in a code into the security pad on the door so he can let me inside. Stepping through I find myself in some kinda holding cage and once the door behind me is shut a sign lights up and tells me to empty my pockets of any electrical devices and weapons.
“Jessie.” Consuela greets me from the other side of the bars with a warm smile, acting like she didn’t just lock away the man who’s like a father to me. “You don’t mind if my colleague here gives you a pat down, do you?” She looks to the guard standing beside her and when I shrug, the gate opens and allows me into the same space where they’re standing. He does a thorough job, and when he’s satisfied he gives her a nod and she proceeds. “If you’d like to follow me, I’ll take you to Jimmer.” She starts walking down a long, brightly lit corridor and once we’re round the corner and away from the guard’s view, I grab her arm and shove her into the wall.
“You better tell me what the fuck is goin’ on here. What is this place and why is there no record of my president’s arrest?”
Consuela remains calm as she looks down at my hand and reminds me, without words, that I’m crossing a line.
“I’ll leave that for Jimmer to explain.” She waits for me to release her before taking a keycard from her pocket and opening up the door beside us. I step inside and when I see Prez sitting behind a metal table unharmed, and looking calm, I release a huge sigh of relief.
“Jessie.” He clears his throat and crosses his hands on the table.
“How the fuck are ya so calm? There’s some real shady shit goin’ on here, Prez, and you’re right in the middle of it.” I barge past Consuela to get to him. I can’t make any sense of this, everything about this place is off, it’s not registered on any database. Maddy looked all that up before I left to come here. It’s also why she begged me not to come out here alone when Consuela told me Prez wanted to see me by myself.
“Sit down, Jess, we got some talkin’ to do.” His voice comes out weak, and I glare at him suspiciously as I do as he asks and take the seat opposite him.
“Cliff got us into deeper shit than we originally thought. Consuela is the agent headin’ the task force that was set up to bring us down,” he admits.
“Shit!” I slam my fist hard at the table.
“It’s okay, Jess. I’m playin’ my part to save the club, and now I need you to do yours.”
“What the fuck are you talkin’ about? Prez, this is crazy, we don’t work with agents.”
“We do when we got no choice. I will not have everythin’ I worked for destroyed by that man. Now, do I have your help or not?” he asks me firmly.
I try and think of what there is that I wouldn’t do for the man sitting in front of me, since my dad died he’s been right by my side. I owe Jimmer Carson everything.
“What d’ya need?” I swallow back the lump in my throat.
“I need ya to go home and be a leader. I need ya to use that clever-assed brain of yours to make sure the club stays on top.” I can hear the defeat behind his words as I shake my head at him in disbelief.
“No. No, I ain’t gonna do that. You’re our leader, Jimmer. You are gonna get out of this place, get whatever charges they got against you dropped, and come fuckin’ home.” I seethe through my teeth at him.
“No, Jess, that’s not how it works. I made a deal and I’m seein’ it through. If I don’t, every single one of you will go to jail.” I slide my hands through my hair when I take in what he’s telling me. It’s bullshit. All of this is fuckin’ bullshit.
“C’mon, we’ve been through worse than this, look what happened to the last agent that tried takin’ us down.” I glance around the room and check for cameras.
“Don’t worry, you can talk freely here, no bugs, no cameras,” he assures me and I can’t believe what I’m hearing.
“You believe that, Jimmer? This is the AT fuckin’ F, they’re gonna be listenin’ in.”
“I told ya, I struck a deal, they’re gettin’ one helluva confession outta me, and they’re puttin’ me away for good. For that, I’m gettin’ the club full immunity from anythin’ they have on their file,” he explains as if he actually thinks this is gonna happen.
“Jimmer, ya can’t trust these people. This place…” I search around the room still trying to figure out what this is.
“I can stay here while I make my statement, Consuela says she can give me a few weeks, there’s no visitation restrictions so I can help you for a while.”
“A while. Prez, d’ya know what will happen when they put you in prison? The place is full of men we’ve either helped put away or made enemies outta. You rule the streets out here, but in there, it’s full of the scum you’ve cleaned up. You’re gonna be a target,” I tell him what he must already know and he shrugs his shoulders like it ain’t a big deal.
“Maybe so, every man’s gotta meet his maker one day, Jess.”
“Stop that.” I slide back on my chair and stand up. “Stop soundin’ like you’ve given up. I’m gonna get Monica on this and we’re bringin’ you home.”
“No,” he tells me sternly. “I’m still the president of this club and I’m tellin’ ya how it’s gonna be. I got an opportunity to protect you, to make sure all my brothers stay with their loved ones, and this is my choice.” He holds firm and goddamn don’t I wanna shake him?
“At what cost? What about Ella? This is killin’ her. You got grandkids, Jimmer. D’ya really wanna miss out on their lives?” He turns his head to look away from me when I make him face up to the reality of all this. “Look at what you”re doin’ here, Prez, look at what you”re throwin’ away.” I try to make him realize what he’s doing because right now, and for the first time in my life, I’m questioning his sanity.
“Don’t ya think I haven’t thought about that? Don’t ya think I wish it could be different, but ask yourself who Ella needs the most. Her dad or her husband? Who do my grandbabies need, their grandpa or their father? Who does Maddy, and your sister need, because if I don’t do this everybody loses.” His eyes glisten with tears that I know he’s too proud to shed. But I let him see mine.
“I can’t,” I admit, feeling like I’m failing him already.
“Sit back down, Jess,” he orders, and when I slowly do as he says he takes my hands and grips ‘em tight.
“I’m gonna tell ya somethin’ that only your pa knew.” He takes a breath and focuses his eyes on mine. “When Mary-Ann told me she was pregnant with Hayley I was angry. Kids weren’t part of my plan, and kids with her certainly weren’t part of the plan.” I frown at him wonderin’ what he means by that. I spent half my childhood living with Mary-Ann and Hayley. “Now, I know Mary-Ann played her part in raisin’ ya, and you’ll always respect her for that, but she wasn’t always who she portrayed herself to be. By the time you came to Colorado, she’d done some acceptin’, but before that things were tough. There were rumors and speculation that it wasn’t just me who could have been Hayley’s father.” Suddenly, my stomach turns cold.
“That’s fuckin’ ridiculous, of course, you’re Hayley’s father!” I don’t know what he’s trying to distract me with here, but it’s bullshit
“Mary-Ann used Hayley like a bargainin’ tool when she first came along, she thought bein’ a father would bring me to heel. Some lawyer I had at the time suggested I do a paternity test in case things ended up goin’ to court.”
“No…” I shake my head. “You are not gonna sit there and tell me that Hayley wasn’t yours.” I’ve dealt with enough of his secrets today.
“I’m not gonna tell ya that, because the truth is, I don’t know. I never opened the results when they came. I didn’t wanna know, because that kid that I was determined I didn’t want, turned my life around. She made me think differently and she made me take the club I was buildin’ in a whole new direction. It stopped bein’ about drug and gun runnin’. It became the family I wanted. I wanted her and Ella to have a family they could always rely on, I wanted you…” He reaches his finger over the table and digs it into the center of my chest. “…to have what your dad wanted for ya too. I may have screwed up a lotta things along the way, but lookin’ around that yard today, seein’ that I achieved that, makes the sacrifice I’m makin’ here worth it.”
“You never read the results,” I repeat his words, wondering how he could have lived all this time never knowing.
“I was too scared to,” he admits. “Just like you”re scared, now. And this is what I’m tryin’ to tell you, Jess. It’s okay to be scared. It’s okay to be uncertain. You just have to trust your instinct. This is my choice. You can’t control it. I’m doin’ this, and you can hate me, and yell at me all ya want, but I know it’s the right thing to do. For my family.” I close my eyes and feel a tear slip onto my cheek as we sit for a few minutes in silence.
“I’ll find another way.” Eventually, I stand back up and this time it’s me pointing my finger at him.
“Jessie,” he calls after me when I head for the door and press the buzzer for the guard to let me out.
“Jessie, wait…!” I can hear the anger in his voice before I turn around.
“I’ll find another way,” I tell him again when the door opens and then before he can argue, I storm out and head for my bike. There’s no way I’m giving up on him. Not a fuckin’ chance.