Chapter 56
This cannot be happening.
I watched the door close as my mate left to comfort Urgg.
Already, I missed him, but he was correct.
He needed to check on Urgg, and I needed to report to Command.
Nonetheless, I wanted Wyn to remain right by me forever.
He should never be out of my sight. That wasn’t practical or healthy. Regardless, my instincts demanded it.
Ignoring the urge, I stood, and Cincin meowed, hopping off her tree to come toward me.
“Do you wish to come with me?” I asked the orange house goddess.
She did not deign to give me a response.
When I left, she walked sedately down the corridor toward my quarters. Shaking my head, I followed her and let her into the shared space before sealing the door and heading to Command. The lift was shaky and slow, but it did take me to my destination.
Talvax glanced at me when I entered. She stood, moving toward the door.
“Captain departing,” I called.
Everyone on Command turned toward her, standing straight.
“Return,” she ordered, slipping out of Command, but not before her tail brushed mine.
I knew she was sorry. Talvax was more than my captain—she was my friend and family.
I needed to forgive her, but it was difficult when Wyn held my soul.
Every concern I had in regards to him was magnified.
He was the most important person to me, and that would never change.
And he had been hurt and could’ve been taken from me because of her.
It would take time before I was able to look at her and see more than Wyn dirty and frantic as he tried to solve an impossible problem.
I took my place on Talvax’s stool and reviewed my reports.
Nothing was working well and all of my officers were putting in more time than was regular because there was no other choice.
I sent a note to each and every officer on board reminding them to rest and care for themselves.
There was a reason for their leisure time; everyone required it.
I didn’t want my people to neglect themselves.
Nothing was pressing besides NAID degrading, which was good because we could hardly handle anything else.
The door opened, and I didn’t bother to look, because it had to be someone authorized. I continued reading the status update about our mission to claim Earth. The vvekians had reached the Drakcon station we were limping toward, so at least something was going well.
“Cousin,” Kalvoxrencol said, making me turn. He wasn’t alone. Serlotminden was right beside him. Their expressions were serious, and both of their tails were limp near their feet.
My soul thumped. My knees shook as I stood. A sudden flare of my inner fire lit up my brain. Whatever happened would change my life.
“Wyn?” I asked, my soul threatening to crack.
“He is fine as far as I’m aware,” Serlotminden said. “We need to speak to you alone.”
I moved toward them, every step filled with dread as my gut curled and threatened to send my lunch spewing from my lips.
When the door to Command closed behind us, I faced them, arms crossed. “Tell me.”
“Let’s go to your quarters first,” Kalvoxrencol insisted in a soft voice, his tail taking mine.
I demanded, “Tell me.”
Serlotminden wrapped his tail around both of ours. “Your parents are dead.”
Pain speared through me and clawed my gut open. “Wh-what? No. How? You must be wrong.”
“Your father joined the Crystal over a week ago and your xapher joined him in eternity yesterday.”
I shook my head, trembling as pain ripped me to shreds.
“Hallonnixmin told us,” Kalvoxrencol said.
“Why didn’t he tell me sooner?” I demanded, my ears ringing as numbness began to spread through my limbs.
“Your xapher forbade him. They withered without your father,” Serlotminden said.
Tears slid down my cheeks and my knees crumpled. My cousins caught me, but I couldn’t pay them any mind.
I was alone. Utterly and completely alone.
I burst into our quarters and spotted Bartholomew on the couch and Cincin on her tree, ears back.
I didn’t bother to greet him or check on her, instead bolting into the bedroom.
Monqilcolnen was sitting on the edge of the bed, his expression blank.
His tail was looped around his ankle and his wings were hugging his shoulders.
Both Kalvoxrencol and Serlotminden were standing beside him, blocking my way. I shoved them both to the side, not caring about their social standing, and launched at Monqilcolnen, straddling his lap and wrapping my arms around his neck.
A shuttered sob escaped him the instant I touched him, and he pulled me close. I took his tail in mine and cupped the back of his head, fingers digging into his scalp. “Star, what’s wrong? Are you hurt?”
He did not speak, but Kalvoxrencol did. “His parents have joined the Crystal.”
A high keen came out of Monqilcolnen as he tugged me even closer.
Tears burned the backs of my eyes as I returned his tight grasp.
Pain cascaded through me. How could they be gone?
While I hadn’t known them for long, the short time had changed me.
I’d cared about both of them as if they’d been my own parents.
I felt warm tears land on me moments before Monqilcolnen began nuzzling me, scent marking me, claiming me, and yanking on my shirt, trying to get it off.
I ignored Kalvoxrencol and Serlotminden, who would hopefully leave, and helped him. Monqilcolnen needed this. He needed to feel me.
The door opened and closed, signaling his cousins’ departure.
Shirt off, my harness went next. We both stripped until we were bare. Monqilcolnen rubbed and marked me frantically, and I massaged the glands on his sides to help him spread his scent.
He was trying to claim me in his sadness, and I understood—he didn’t want to be alone.
Part of me wished to tell Monqilcolnen I was his mate and I would never leave him, but in his state he would agree without truly thinking about it.
And later, after he’d recovered, he would stay true to his word, even if he didn’t want to be my mate.
While I was almost certain Monqilcolnen did want me and would eventually want that bond, I refused to take advantage of him and his fragile state right now.
I kissed his head. “Take what you need from me, Star. Whatever you need is fine.”
Monqilcolnen did not respond as he kept scent marking me.
Eventually, Monqilcolnen had fallen asleep, curled up half on top of me. I had been able to sit up and cover both of us with a sheet before reaching for my touchstone—it was still inactive.
“NAID,” I whispered.
“Yeeees?” it responded in a distorted voice.
“Tell the Princes Serlotminden and Kalvoxrencol to come in.”
NAID didn’t respond again, so I had no idea if it was getting them or not, but I refused to move Monqilcolnen. He needed me. As much as I desired more information, it wasn’t worth it to upset him. I pressed another kiss to his hair, and he curled in tighter against me.
The door slid open, and I demanded in a quiet voice, “What exactly happened?”
Both of them lifted their eyebrows at my tone and Monqilcolnen’s and my position, or my wing, perhaps. I honestly didn’t even care. I needed to know how best to help my mate.
Serlotminden offered me his throat, and I blinked in surprise. I would have never suspected he’d do that to someone like me.
“You are Monqilcolnen’s, and we owe you our gratitude for holding him,” Serlotminden explained with a slight smile.
“What happened to his parents?” I asked again, my soul throbbing. My grief was nothing compared to Monqilcolnen’s, but it was still present. Cold darkness, like the void of space, threatened to draw me under, but I refused to allow it.
“Jemtonkilsol died unexpectedly. His soul just stopped. No warning. Nothing. He just died,” Kalvoxrencol said, wiping a tear off his cheek. “Dilvonsil refused to allow anyone to inform Monqilcolnen no matter how much Father and Hallonnixmin begged. They started to wither.”
I closed my eyes. Mates very rarely survived one another. We loved too fully. It was difficult to live when the reason your soul beat was no longer beside you.
“They wouldn’t speak to Monqilcolnen, even though the doctors recommended it. Sometimes connecting with family can slow or even halt the process, but…” he trailed off.
I stroked Monqilcolnen’s cheek. “Dilvonsil chose to follow their mate.”
“Yes,” Kalvoxrencol said.
Tugging my mate closer, I kissed his forehead, and in his sleep, he nuzzled my chest. Keeping him close, I said, “I have him.”
They both hesitated.
I growled, not even upset or sorry about it. My wings flared. “Monqilcolnen is mine.”
Serlotminden grinned, crossing his arms. “So he is.”
Kalvoxrencol smiled as well, but it was tempered. “We shall be right outside.”
I cupped the back of Monqilcolnen’s head. I did not need them. I would soothe my mate and keep him safe all on my own.
I kissed his forehead and whispered, “I am right here, Star. I shall never leave you.”