Chapter 64
And we wait.
After Monqilcolnen was treated, he was moved to a bed right next to Camden.
I sat on the edge of Monqilcolnen’s bed and stared at the human.
His chest continued to rise and fall at a steady rate, and we were all waiting for it to stop.
Noxlyn was holding Camden’s hand on the other side of the bed, and Seth was sitting on a chair, quiet and staring at the floor.
Serlotminden, Kalvoxrencol, and Bartholomew had all stopped by earlier to update Monqilcolnen as well as check on us.
Talvax had a broken arm and some ribs, but she’d refused to get treatment.
Urgg had attached themselves to her side, to protect and help their mate.
Several people had died in the crash and even more were injured.
Mistress Kel’yeena had died in the crash, and I didn’t know how I felt. She was—had been my friend. She was gone, crushed in her shop as she continued to feed people and care for the civilians. I wanted to cry; I wanted to shriek, but I couldn’t. It felt as if my emotions were dammed up.
Gorgownun also died. I hadn’t known her well, but when Monqilcolnen had heard the news, he’d lost his breath and his eyes had welled up.
Cencay had died from their injuries. They had been impaled, and nothing we could do had saved their young life. The thought of their youth and smiles broke my soul. I couldn’t believe they were gone. They had been a ball of energy and sunshine.
Ten others had died as well. No humans. Yet.
The air in the medbay was heavy. All the beds were filled and even more temporary cots had been brought in for the injured. A cargo bay was acting as the second medbay for the less injured.
While the blow had been glancing, it had wrought heavy damage to the Admiral Ven.
The virus destroying NAID was no longer the only pressing concern.
One whole side of the ship had been stripped.
Thankfully, the emergency functions were still intact and had erected shields to prevent too much damage or the ship from depressurizing.
The damaged sections had been evacuated, and the bulkheads sealed to keep us as safe as we could be.
Now, all we could do was creep toward the closest station. I didn’t know if the Admiral Ven could be saved, and I wasn’t sure I even cared. Lives had been lost. And we stood to lose even more. The corridors of the ship would always be tainted with the blood of those who’d been lost.
My eyes were latched onto Camden. I feared if I looked away, he would take his last breath, leaving us behind.
If I was scared, Noxlyn was terrified. He wouldn’t move from where he was riveted beside Camden, his hand locked around his still one.
His tail never ceased moving. He had snapped at Qinlin and Klars when neither of them could help Camden further, and every time either came near he would ask more questions and demand solutions. He wasn’t giving up.
I wished I was like him, but… I had no hope.
Jemtonkilsol and Dilvonsil were gone. Kel’yeena was gone.
Cencay was gone. Camden… he was going to die.
All it took to see that was a glance. Burns plastered in numbing skins covered one of his arms and the whole side of his chest, up his neck, and had taken one of his ears and marred his cheek.
His hip had been shattered as well as one of his legs and a couple of vertebrae.
Klars and Qinlin had repaired his broken bones, mostly, though if he lived, he wouldn’t have full mobility and would exist in a great deal of pain. His burns were infected, and he was in organ failure. It was simply a matter of time.
Monqilcolnen pulled me down onto the bed and wrapped his arms around me, tugging me close.
His even breath rushing over the back of my neck soothed some of the tension coiling in my muscles.
He was here. That was something. I was here.
Seth was here. Urgg was here. So many of us had survived.
That was something. But when my eyes landed on Camden, a sob built in my chest. It was something, but not everything.
“I must apologize,” Monqilcolnen whispered low enough that no one beside me would overhear.
Glancing over my shoulder, I asked, “About what, Star?”
His eyes turned glassy, and my soul stumbled. Monqilcolnen cleared his throat. “If I had sensed the siscurras sooner, we could have evaded it.”
“No.” I rolled over, finally letting myself look away from Camden. “No. You can’t blame yourself.”
“I can and do.”
I rested a hand on his cheek, dragging my thumb over him. “It’s my fault.”
“How?” he asked as his eyebrows drew together.
“I hampered the sensors.”
“That wouldn’t have helped us,” Monqilcolnen said, shifting closer to me to press his forehead against mine. “Our sensors wouldn’t have picked up a siscurras in time.”
“Then it isn’t your fault,” I said with a slight smile.
He frowned.
“If our sensors couldn’t have picked up a siscurras in time, then we were fortunate you were in Command when it happened.” I’d known about siscurra not showing up on sensors already, but this seemed the most logical way to help Monqilcolnen. “We would’ve died, Star, if you hadn’t saved us.”
His eyes closed and tears slid down his cheeks. “But I didn’t save everyone.”
I licked the salty drops away. “Even you cannot save everyone, Mate.”
“But I want to.”
“So do I, but we don’t have the power to save everyone, Star.” I took a shuddering inhale. “We are just us, and we have to do our best. We can’t be perfect. You saved us. You saved the ship.”
“But—”
I placed my fingers over his lips to stop him. “No, Monqilcolnen. You cannot save everyone, but you did save us. Now, we just have to keep breathing until it hurts less.”
At the thought of breathing, I rolled back over to look at Camden. His chest was still rising and falling, but even I could see it was shallower and more strained. It would be soon. Tears burned the backs of my eyes. Monqilcolnen dragged me tight against him, holding me securely.
Time passed. Slowly and yet fast at the same time.
Eventually, Kalvoxrencol came with a sleeping Bobbinvoxlyn in his arms, followed by Serlotminden and Bartholomew.
They all took a seat and waited in silence with us.
A couple hours after them, Urgg came in with Captain Talvax in their arms. Finally, she allowed Qinlin to heal her injuries, then both of them settled on a cot, watching Camden while Urgg held Talvax on their lap, gently rocking her.
Time continued to pass, and Camden’s breath grew raspier and slight until his chest stopped and the monitor stopped bouncing with his vitals, going blank.
“No,” Noxlyn cried, pressing his forehead against Camden’s. “No, please don’t leave me.” Tears slid down his cheeks. “You’re my first and only friend. I need you. Please, Camden. Please!”
“Little Shadow,” Qinlin said, coming up behind him and resting her hands on his shoulders. “He is gone.”
Noxlyn shoved her away. “Camden! Please!”
“Noxlyn,” his mother tried again.
Tears slid down my cheeks as I sobbed. Monqilcolnen rubbed his nose against the nape of my neck, his tears hitting my scales.
Bartholomew slid onto Serlotminden’s lap and buried his face against his mate.
Kalvoxrencol reached for his mate, but Seth stood and grabbed Noxlyn’s hand, not saying anything, just holding him.
“Camden,” Noxlyn groaned, falling to his knees. “It’s all my fault. This should be me.”
I blinked. Had his chest just moved? My eyes flicked to the monitor, but nothing. Still, I knew what I’d seen. I pushed out of Monqilcolnen’s grasp. “Camden?”
Seth frowned at me.
I ignored him and dropped my head to Camden’s chest.
“What are you doing?” Noxlyn snarled. “Don’t touch him.”
Monqilcolnen growled, and I could hear him struggling to get up.
“Be quiet,” I snapped. Closing my eyes, I listened.
Thump.
My soul throbbed.
Thump.
Ever so slightly, his chest rose under my head.
“He’s alive,” I said.
“What?” Noxlyn shoved me away and pressed his ear against Camden’s chest. A moment later he sobbed. “Camden. Thank you. Thank you for staying.”
“Little Shadow,” Qinlin started, but Noxlyn silenced her with a wave.
“He is fighting, Mother,” he said, keeping his head against Camden’s chest. “I need you to fight for him too.”
“Noxlyn.” She shook her head.
“I need him.” He stared straight at Qinlin, who met his gaze with a frown.
She closed her eyes, then turned toward Serlotminden. “Go get that worthless amorian. We have more work to do tonight. No time for any of us to rest.”
I smiled at Seth, who took a deep breath, and looked at the monitor that still showed no readings. I said, “We won’t be able to trust NAID any longer, I fear.”
Seth bobbed his head. “So it seems.”
Noxlyn didn’t move from his place against Camden’s chest.
My smile grew at the sight, and I turned toward Monqilcolnen. He brushed my cheek. “Hope.”
I glanced back at Camden. “Yes. Hope.”
Camden might not live, but he was still fighting.
And the hope of that was burning bright within my chest. It didn’t fix anything.
One look at the medbay full of injured people spoke to that, let alone the lives lost, some so heavy on my soul that it hurt to breathe, but Camden fighting had given me hope.
This journey wasn’t over, and I’d find a way to save the Admiral Ven so we could make it to Earth and protect the humans.