28. Wyatt
28
WYATT
I’m silent through Matthias’s story, horror growing with every sordid detail.
When he finishes, there’s only one question I can think to ask him. “You really went to The Firm for me?”
He nods. “Of course I did. I would’ve done literally anything to fix what my father had ruined.”
“Fuck.” I sit forward, resting my head in my hands. My mind is reeling as history rewrites itself in my mind. Matthias didn’t set me up, his father did.
I don’t question it. It makes perfect sense. Matthias wouldn’t betray me like that.
I should’ve known. I should’ve fucking known .
“Why the fuck did you go to The Firm though? I’m not worth that. You had no idea what they’d ask of you, damnit.”
Rough fingers catch my chin, forcing me to look at him. The fire in his gaze has me flinching. “What do you mean, not worth it? Don’t you get it, you’re worth everything to me. I didn’t give a shit what the price was, so long as you were safe.”
I shake my head, my vision growing blurry. “No. You shouldn’t have done that.”
He lets go of my face with a snarl. “You know what? Fuck you.”
It’s such an abrupt shift in tone that it catches me off guard. “What?”
But he’s walking away from me, striding into the house. I stand up, stumbling after him, refusing to let him go. We’re getting this all out in the open now. Once and for all. He can’t just run away. Not now. Not again.
I follow him into his office, closing the door behind us so we won’t be disturbed. Matthias has his back to me, his shoulders tense as he pours himself a shot of whiskey.
He downs it in one gulp and returns the glass. “You have some fucking nerve.”
He’s still pissed at me, but for once, I don’t know what for. “Why, exactly?”
“Because you’re criticizing me for the very thing you did.” He wheels around, nostrils flaring. “So, it’s okay for you to go to The Firm for someone you love, but it’s not okay when I do the same?”
“You loved me?” I take a step forward but falter with the glare he gives me. “Even back then?”
Matthias nods curtly. The fire in the hearth throws stark shadows over the lines of his face. A face I know as well as my own, one I’ve traced so often with my fingertips. “Of course I did. I think I’ve loved you since before I even knew what love was.”
I press the heel of my hand to my chest as I try and take it all in, my breathing growing ragged, my mind spinning.
Matthias has always loved me. He didn’t set me up. He didn’t betray me.
But something still isn’t adding up, and it’s that missing part of the equation that has the emotion I’m most familiar with rising up. The one I channel when I grab both his hands, needing something to hold on to. Anything to save me from falling into this abyss of uncertainty. “All this time. Why the fuck didn’t you tell me? Why did you switch schools and fucking ghost me for all those years? Was it because you were afraid of what else your father might do?”
“No,” Matthias says fiercely. “That wouldn’t have kept me away from you. I was selfish enough, even back then, to prefer we face whatever he threw at us together. I would’ve cut him off entirely if it meant keeping you in my life.”
“Then why?”
“Every request has a price,” Matthias says softly, his gaze cutting away. He inhales deeply and then speaks, “Mine was to never speak to you again.”
That doesn’t make any sense. Why would The Firm want to keep us apart? “But?—”
Matthias’s phone starts to ring, the tone I now associate with Wylder. He ignores it. “Listen, there’s more that?—”
His phone stops ringing and then mine starts. I pull it out of my pocket and sigh at the unknown number flashing up on my screen. “I’m guessing Wylder somehow has my number?”
A vein is throbbing in Matthias’s forehead. “Absolute fucker. I’m so sorry. Shit. I didn’t give it to him.”
“It’s okay,” I try to smile at him, but everything is too fresh. Too confusing. It comes out sadder than it should be, a sneer and a pout. “Take the call. He won’t stop until you do.”
He nods as my phone stops ringing and his starts again. “I’m not leaving. I don’t care if the whole fucking world is burning down, I’m not going anywhere until this is sorted. Okay?”
The smile comes easily this time. “Okay. Yeah.”
He leaves the room, his tone curt as he answers. His voice drifts off down the hall. It’s only as the silence falls that I hear the drumming in my head. It’s a relentless beat at my temples. Unsurprising, given the fuck-ton of information that’s been dumped on me this evening. It’s too much, too overwhelming. I can barely breathe past the headache building.
Matthias must have some painkillers in here somewhere. I could go to the kitchen, but then I might have to face Jules or Jackson. Maybe even Harley, given how often he likes to linger around our resident chef.
The last thing I want to do right now is speak to anyone other than my husband.
Going over to his desk, I search the tabletop for medicine with no luck. I eye his drawers warily. It feels like I’m stepping over a line if I open them, but surely he won’t mind, right? We’re husbands.
Fake, supposedly. But after tonight…it feels more real than ever before.
The headache pulses again, pain hitting me right behind the eyes and making the decision for me. I go through the drawers on the left with no luck. The top drawer on the right yields no results either. But in the bottom one, there’s a distinctive pill bottle at the back.
“Thank fuck,” I mutter, reaching in to grab it. As I do so, my knuckles catch on something on the top of the drawer. It’s a piece of paper or something. Whatever it is, it’s in my way. I frown and yank it out so I can get to the bottle.
And then everything stops.
Because I know this writing.
It’s mine.
Nausea bubbles up as my eyes race over the script. I don’t know why I bother. I know what this is. What it says. When I wrote it and why.
The only thing I don’t know is why it’s hidden in my husband’s desk.
The door swings open and Matthias steps back inside. “Okay, I’ve got Wylder off my back and I’ve made him swear never to call you ag?—”
His words cut off abruptly as he spots what I’m holding. He freezes, going completely ashen.
It’d be comical if my heart wasn’t currently shredding itself to pieces inside my chest. I feel like I’m breaking apart. Like those carefully sewn threads I meticulously stitched into my heart all those years ago are slowly disintegrating, one by one.
“What is this?” I whisper hoarsely. “Why do you have this?”
He doesn’t answer me. His lips move, but no sound comes out. Or maybe it does. Maybe I just can’t hear him over the fracture that’s forming between us.
I come around the desk slowly, the paper crumpling in my hand. “Matthias, why do you have the fucking letter I wrote to The Firm?”
He finally finds his voice. “I can explain?—”
“No,” I say quietly. The pieces are falling into place, building a picture I’m not sure Matthias can explain away. “There’s only one reason you’d have this.”
I come to a stop inches away from him, but I’ve never felt more distance between us. “You lied to me. You told me you don’t work for The Firm.”
“No,” he says urgently. “I didn’t lie to you. We don’t work for The Firm.” He runs a hand through his hair, tugging on it in the anxious way he does. “The Buckinghams are The Firm.”
I shove the piece of paper against his chest as venom fires through me. “That’s the same fucking thing, Matthias. The same thing. ”
“Listen to me,” he repeats desperately. “Please, Wy…”
More pieces fall into place and it’s like a knife to my gut. “You don’t owe The Firm anything. You don’t have an inheritance due.”
He can’t look at me. He inhales deeply. Exhales.
And shakes his head.
“You set this whole thing up,” I whisper as another emotion rushes to replace the anger. Heartbreak. “Please. Tell me you didn’t. Tell me you didn’t manipulate this whole situation to get back into my life.”
He’s silent, and I want to shake him. So I do. I grab his shoulders, and he makes no move to stop me.
“Tell me,” I roar, blinking away the heat burning in my eyes. “Tell me, damnit! Tell me this wasn’t a setup from the start. Please, Matt. Baby, please. I love you. Please tell me you didn’t do this.”
I’m begging him. I thought we’d been in this together from the start. The two of us making the most of a situation we’d been forced into by this big, bad entity that saved us and manipulated us at the same time.
But only one of us has been manipulated.
“Please,” I’m sobbing now, my hands trembling on his shoulders. “Please. Tell me it was one of the others. I dare you. I fucking dare you.”
He finally looks me in the eye, and it’s then that my heart shatters. The resignation. “I can’t.”
Two words and the foundation between us collapses.
We came so close. So close to making it. Tonight, I thought I’d finally gotten the truth from Matthias. That we could step forward into a new future, one built on honesty and mutual respect.
But he’s been lying to me about so much more. Not just about this, or about us, but about who he is. What he does. All those nights he showed up bloody, his clothes burning in the fire…all of that. Oh my god.
The Buckinghams are The Firm. Matthias is The Firm.
“Was that all a lie?” I gesture toward the garden in frustration. “Everything you told me just now? About going to The Firm?”
“No.” He lifts his chin defiantly but there’s a sheen to his eyes that I fucking hate. I’m so pissed at him, but I can’t stand that he’s hurting. “That was all true.”
“But the rest was a lie,” I confirm, needing to know. “The marriage. All of it.”
“It was my way back into your life,” Matthias’s voice breaks, and I flinch. “I couldn’t think of another option.”
“Bullshit,” I whisper, swiping at the tears that are still falling freely. “That’s fucking bullshit . You’re telling me you couldn’t have found my address? The Firm can fix anything, apparently, so don’t stand there and tell me you didn’t have the resources to find another way.”
Matt’s nostrils flare. “And then what would’ve happened, huh? I’ll tell you what. You would’ve slammed the door in my face. We both know there’s not a fucking chance in hell that you would’ve listened to me.”
“I guess we’ll never know now. You took the choice away from me.” I want to glare at him, but I’m too hurt. I need to retreat before any more damage is done. “I let you in once and ended up heartbroken. I swore I’d never do it again.”
“Wy—” He reaches for me, but I step back. I can’t let him touch me. Not now. I’m barely holding it together as it is.
“Guess that makes me the fool,” I choke out. I can barely make Matthias out through my blurred vision now. “I let you in, against my better judgment, and once again, I end up broken just like before.”
His hand falls to his side.
“It’s so much worse this time,” I say. “I fell in love with you. I am in love with you. But it’s a version of you that doesn’t exist. I love the Matthias who drives into banana trees. Who pouts when I’m being a brat. Who patiently listens to me talk about gardening.”
“I’m still him,” Matthias’s voice trembles. “That man exists.”
“But so does this one.” I hold up the crumpled paper in my fist. “And I don’t know him. I fell for you, but I didn’t have a say in the matter. Not really. You orchestrated this whole thing. You caught me at my most vulnerable moment and took advantage of it.”
He stares at me silently. It’s like a mask slips over his face, hiding the man I know so far away I’m not sure he’ll ever come back.
“Well, if that’s how you feel,” he says smoothly, heading to his desk. “I guess you should leave.”
My jaw drops as he sits behind his desk, casually picking up a pen and pulling a document toward him. “What?”
“Leave,” he repeats, brow furrowed as his gaze scans over the document. “You’re free of your bargain. No harm will come to you or Jackson.”
“That’s it?” I whisper in disbelief, stepping toward his desk. “That’s all you’ve got to say?”
His piercing gaze meets mine. The coolness is another dagger to my heart. “I think you’ve said enough for both of us. Now, if you don’t mind, I’ve got a lot to do.”
“What the fuck, Matthias?” I shove the papers in front of him, gratified at how the pen cracks in his hand as they scatter to the floor. “You’re not going to fight for me? For us?”
He hesitates, just a moment before he shakes his head.
“No.” There’s no inflection. No emotion. “Everything you said is correct. I did orchestrate all of this. I knew you were at your lowest, and I made the most of it. And what’s more, I’d do the same again if I could.”
“Fuck you,” I whisper. “ Fuck you. ”
We’re silent for a long time, sadness and anger creeping over me like a veil.
“So, that’s it.” The familiar numbness is creeping in as well, shutting off all of those unwelcome feelings. I embrace it like an old friend. Anything has to be better than the soul-crushing pain currently coursing through me. “I guess we’re done. This marriage is over.”
Matthias laughs bitterly. “You forget. The marriage was never real to begin with.”
That’s a shot to my heart, a pierce to my gut. I don’t understand why Matthias is trivializing what we had. Why he’s so ready to give up on us.
And suddenly, I’m too exhausted to care.
“Yeah. You’re right. It wasn’t real to begin with,” I say. “But it became real, for me at least. Guess I was right. I am the fool. A fool to have ever loved you.”
I turn to leave, my eyes watering, everything around me going silent.
And he doesn’t try to stop me.