3. Tripp
Chapter 3
Tripp
I lied. I didn’t turn in like I told Penny I would. Instead, I was cozied up to the bar inside the Watering Hole, nursing my third—or was it fourth?—whiskey. I’d lost count at some point, but however many it was, I hadn’t hit the magic number required to wipe this day from my memory. I was determined to keep going until my mind went blank and my chest stopped aching.
Was this how I was destined to spend the rest of my days? Numbing the pain at the local bar because the woman I loved—my best friend—was building a life with someone else?
Nausea churned in my stomach at the mere thought of him touching her perfect body, of him having carnal knowledge of how she looked, sounded, and tasted when she came. Grimacing, I swallowed down the bile that rose in my throat, chasing the foul taste away with what remained of my whiskey before signaling for another.
Jesse folded both arms over her chest as she shot me with a look of disapproval. “I don’t know what’s got you drowning in a bottle tonight, Tripp, but I’m not about to let you drink yourself to death over it. ”
They’d all know soon enough. As soon as news broke of Penny’s engagement, I wouldn’t be able to escape the hushed whispers around town about how I was the fool who’d let her get away when she’d been right there for the taking all along.
That’s why I had to get the hell outta dodge the minute the sun came up. I couldn’t stay here and watch her marry another man while simultaneously being forced to endure everyone’s opinion on the matter.
Pushing the empty tumbler across the lacquered wood counter, I changed my drink order. “Fine. A water, then.”
Jesse placed the dirty glass into a bin for washing, then held her hand out, curling her fingers in a gimme motion. When I raised an eyebrow at the gesture, she demanded, “Keys.”
I groaned. “Oh, come on.”
She gave a firm shake of her head. “I’ve already let you have one more than I should have, so you can bet your ass I’m not about to let you drive home. Hand ’em over.”
Cursing small-town life under my breath, I reached into my pocket and produced my keys. Seemingly satisfied, Jesse slid a glass of water toward me. Running a cash sale at the register, she dropped my key fob into the drawer before slamming it closed. As she made her way down the bar, she tossed over her shoulder, “I’ll give those to your ride when he gets here.”
With my brain a little fuzzy from the alcohol, I blinked at her. “My ride?”
“Should be here any minute.” She pulled on the tap, pouring a beer.
Dropping my head to the wooden bar top, I let out a low moan of agony. The way my day was going, Jesse had called my father to drag my drunk ass home, and I’d had more than my fill of his brand of tough love for one day.
Our scene in the kitchen earlier was the first time I’d ever raised my voice toward the man who’d given me life. Respect for my elders had been ingrained from an early age, but losing Penny and having it pointed out that I only had myself to blame had pushed me right over the edge.
A hand landed on my shoulder, and I shifted my gaze to peek at the shoes of whoever had come to collect me from the bar. When they weren’t cowboy boots, I breathed a sigh of relief and lifted my head.
Sympathetic, warm brown eyes stared back at me when my brother-in-law took a seat on the barstool beside mine. “I’d ask how you’re hanging in there, but I have a feeling I already know the answer.”
I dragged my thumbs through the condensation collecting on my water glass. “You should be home with Aspen.”
Mac chuckled. “I’ll deny it to my dying day if you breathe a word of this to your sister, but she snores something fierce now that she’s pregnant. I can’t sleep anyway with her rattling the floorboards harder than an earthquake, so you’re actually doing me a favor by giving me an excuse to get out for a bit of sweaty, smoky bar air.”
When I narrowed my eyes at him, he began to rise. “Or if you’d prefer, I can dial up Daddy Jett and see if he’d be interested in leaving the comfort of his warm bed to pick up his baby boy, who reeks of cheap whiskey.”
“Sit your ass back down,” I snapped.
Flashing me a shit-eating grin, he did just that. “That’s what I thought.”
Jesse appeared before us, leaning an elbow on the bar. “Appreciate you comin’ down to get him, Mac.”
“Sure thing, Jess.” He handed over a credit card. “How about you close out his tab and tack on a cola for me? We’re gonna sit here for a bit before heading home.”
My hand reached for my wallet automatically. “Can pay for my own damn drinks.”
“’Course you can,” Mac agreed. “But you’re the closest thing I’ll ever have to a brother, and you’ve had one hell of a day, so let me do this.”
Because I was an absolute glutton for punishment, I forced out through a windpipe lined with razor blades, “Tell me what I need to know.”
Jesse returned with his credit card and soda, and he waited until she was out of earshot before asking, “About Jake?”
I grunted in the affirmative.
“Far as I can tell, he treats her right. But I don’t know him that well.”
“Clearly, neither does she.” My hand tightened around my glass so hard it was a wonder it didn’t shatter. “Yet she’s marrying him.”
“Yeah, about that . . .” His grimace was audible. “According to Aspen, there is some history there.”
My head whipped around so fast my neck cracked. “What kind of history?”
Mac shifted uncomfortably under my intense stare. “I guess they were together in vet school for a bit and picked back up again a couple of weeks ago.”
With my heart hammering in my ears, the room began to spin. At Mac’s words, the veil was lifted, and I realized there were parts of Penny’s life she kept hidden.
Until today, I’d never seen her with any man in a romantic capacity. I’d figured we were both dancing around our feelings for each other, holding out for that perfect moment when the stars aligned and we got over our fears of ruining our friendship to make a go of it. Never once had it crossed my mind that she might’ve been dating, and learning that she had a history with other men made my gut twist painfully.
“Fuck, I think I’m gonna be sick.”
“Okay, let’s get you outta here.” Mac eased me off my stool and down the hallway toward the rear entrance.
The second we cleared the threshold into the parking lot, I bent over, purging the contents of my stomach onto the pavement .
My brother-in-law waited at a safe distance until my heaves grew dry, and then he stepped forward to help ease me upright. “Take a few deep breaths for me.”
I wiped my mouth with the back of my hand. “I can’t watch her do it. I can’t.”
“I know.” He guided me toward his SUV. “I wouldn’t be able to, either.”
Slumping into the passenger seat, I let my eyes fall shut. “I’m leaving in the morning. Tell her goodbye for me?”
“Anything you need, brother. She’ll understand. She loves you.”
In my drunken state, I almost managed to convince myself he was talking about Penny instead of Aspen.
“What’re you doin’ back so soon? Figured you’d be gone ’til we were ready to pack up on Monday and needed to hitch the trailer to your truck.” My second-in-command, Ricky, couldn’t hide his surprise that I’d returned to Guymon barely twenty-four hours after leaving for home.
Hooking my heel on the bottom rung of the grazing pen, I rested my forearms over the top of the gate, staring out at our horses.
My silence sparked concern from the man by my side. “You all right there, Tripp?”
I hung my head and let out a deep exhale. “Not really.”
“Is it your folks? Are Aspen and the baby okay?”
“Everyone’s fine,” I assured him. “Just got a little more than I bargained for by sneaking home for Penny’s birthday. ”
A low whistle sounded behind me. “Boss is pissed, ain’t he? Told ya you shoulda cleared it with him first before leaving me in charge.”
“He wasn’t exactly thrilled I didn’t give him a heads-up or ask permission before abandoning my post, but it’s not that.”
“We playin’ twenty questions all day, or are you gonna spit it out?”
The part of me still in denial felt that if I didn’t utter the words aloud, I could pretend that none of this was happening. But I knew that’s not how life worked. No matter what I did or didn’t say, I’d let the girl who owned my heart get away.
“Penny’s getting married.”
Ricky sucked in a sharp breath. “Shit.”
Keeping my eyes straight ahead, I grunted.
“Well, what are we hanging around here for? We should be off somewhere getting you drunk.”
The mere thought of alcohol was enough to turn my stomach after last night. “Already did that. Didn’t help.”
“Sorry, man.” A hand clamped down on my shoulder, and I finally dared to turn my head to look at Ricky. As soon as I did, I instantly regretted it. The pity from my friends and family was more than I could bear.
“I’m fine.” I shrugged his touch away. “We’re here to do a job, so let’s do it and move on to the next.”
“Yep, got it.”
His steps faded away, leaving me in solitude, which was a little taste of what my future would look like.
I’d be completely and utterly alone for the rest of my days while some other man enjoyed a life I coveted with the woman I loved.