Chapter 17
FINLEY
I think I’m sick.
Feverish. I’m sweating so much my hair is glued to my nape. My limbs feel heavy, weighted into the mattress so I can’t move to cover myself when the A/C’s chill skates across my back.
I’m hot and cold all at once…
“Stop wriggling,” a deep, sleepy voice grumbles from behind me.
I snap my eyes open to Jayden’s soft, sleeping face. His even breaths fan my cheek, sending a warm tingle of goosebumps all the way to my toes.
In the pale wash of moonlight, he looks younger than his twenty-seven years.
He could be a teenager with those long lashes and flawless skin.
The straight line of his nose has the slightest upturn that emphasizes the defined curve of his cupid’s bow.
Jayden has lips made for kissing and kissing and kissing. Hours and hours of it.
My pulse speeds when Elijah’s hand rests at the back of my knee. His lips press to my shoulder, scattering gentle pecks up to the crook of my neck as his hand smooths up my thigh, gripping the fleshy part below my ass.
He’s touching me—really touching me. His hands roam my body, heavy and calloused.
I can’t get enough of it.
“It’s three in the morning,” he whispers in my ear as I twist beneath the weight of his and Jayden’s legs curled over mine, shifting my back to his front while his hand trails up, over his spare boxer briefs and beneath Jayden’s T-shirt from last night.
When I guide it just below my breast, a tortured groan escapes him. “You should be sleeping.”
“So should you,” I murmur, still watching Jayden sleep while Elijah palms the curve of my rib cage.
His other hand slips beneath my head, his arm stretching across the pillows as he rests the side of his face over mine, watching him, too.
“He’s breathtaking, isn’t he?” Elijah murmurs across my cheek, lightly brushing JJ’s rebellious curl from his forehead.
I feel the subtle push and pull of his muscles beneath me as his thumb skims a whisper-light line across Jayden’s brow.
“Yes, he is,” I answer, entranced by the gentleness of his thick, long fingers caressing our man’s golden skin.
There’s something awing about watching them together. Their manly bodies and limbs become this paradox of gentle roughness I’ve never known. The natural coarseness of their moves contrasts with the tenderness of their affections. It’s the most incredible sight.
And I wonder… “Have you always loved him?”
Elijah stills at my question. After a beat, he thaws slowly.
“I don’t know. The first time I met JJ, I was lost, Fin.
I didn’t know how to feel about a lot of things, and my trust issues didn’t help.
” His fingers ghost the line of Jayden’s jaw while his hand on my ribs keeps palming me deeper into him.
“But you know JJ—you know he has a way of disarming people. Every time I pushed him away, he would somehow edge closer, even when he gave me space, and at some point, I realized that he is safe, that I can trust him.”
“When did you fall in love with him? Was it like me? You always did, but it took you time to accept it, or…”
“We became friends, and then our friendship grew, and he became a constant. There are days we spend the whole time together from our morning workout, to training, to chilling out at home… even when we’re not in the same room, we’ll game together… He’s always there.”
“So it is like you and me. Even if we had to hide our friendship. We spent every moment we could together after I wriggled myself under your nose.”
“Under my nose?” Elijah chuckles quietly, resting his hand on Jayden’s pillow, half-buried in his hair.
“Yeah, I used to follow you around all the time; you just didn’t notice me until we were in school.
Then you saw me standing in the middle of the main hall, working up the courage to break the rules and cross the line for you.
” That’s how long I’ve loved him, and there hasn’t been a single second I’ve regretted it or wished I didn’t.
My love for him is woven into every cell of my DNA.
“You burrowed under my skin like a tick, and I haven’t shaken you off since.” Flattening his hand to the top of my chest, he presses it over my hammering heart. “I wouldn’t have it any other way.”
“The other boy in the photo… Ryker?” The question hisses out before I can stop it. Too late to take it back, so I go on. “Did you care about him? Like you feel for Jayden?”
Elijah tenses around me. His leg hooks between mine like he’s holding me hostage.
“Eli?” I coax.
I guess I’ve wondered since I saw the article. Seeing him now with Jayden, knowing how he feels about him, makes me wonder if he’s felt that way about men before.
It won’t change how I feel—nothing could. I just need to know I didn’t miss a part of him this big. Because in my heart, I still believe I know Elijah better than I know myself.
“No,” he bites out. “It’s only ever been you and JJ, Fin. Always you until Jayden, and now… I… I need you both. I want you both…”
“And who is Ryker to you? Why did he find me? Talk to me like he didn’t know who I am?”
“I don’t know, Fin. I never thought I’d see him again after—” He cuts off.
“After what?”
His whole body coils tighter, breaths turning shallow and fast. “At one time, I thought we were friends, but I was mistaken. We weren’t friends, and I definitely did not care for him the way I do for you and JJ. I could never love someone like him.”
It’s the rancor in his voice that pushes me. “What did he do to you? Did he hurt you?”
Elijah swallows, and whatever he says next, I already know the answer: Yes, Ryker Hallman hurt him.
“He’s a piece of shit, Fin. He’s a liar and manipulator and… I hate him.”
Although I want to delve deeper, ask more questions, I swallow it all down. Turning my face to graze my lips across his cheek and trail a slew of kisses to his ear, nipping at his lobe.
“I’m sorry,” I whisper. “For whatever he did. For however he hurt you… I’m really sorry, Elijah.”
“Don’t, Finley. Don’t you dare apologize for his actions… for his sins. Don’t. Okay?”
I nod.
Quiet folds around us, amplifying the thunder of his heart. I don’t know how to calm him—to bring him back to peace.
“I love you, Elijah Benjamin Sylkes. I always have and always will. You know that, don’t you?”
He nods. But my words don’t feel like enough, so I keep going.
“You are the only constant love I’ve known, Eli.
I learned what this kind of love is from you, and I never believed I could feel this way for anyone else until JJ.
” He shifts so our faces tilt toward each other.
His eyes are darker than an abyss, ready to swallow me whole as I tell him, “That first day I met him, I knew you loved him. I felt it as deep as my love for you runs, down to the marrow of my bones. To the core of my heart… my soul. I could not love you completely without loving him, and I do love you, Eli. With every fiber of my being.”
His gaze roams my face, dancing between my eyes and lips.
Just when I think he’ll speak, Elijah kisses me instead.
Chaste at first, then slowly building, stealing all my breath, a sweet adrenaline coursing through me as he drags his mouth from mine and nips a burning trail to the spot behind my ear that makes me shiver.
With a firm kiss, he settles me back against him and wriggles me closer to Jayden until their legs tangle across mine. I’m fully cocooned when Elijah whispers, “Sleep now, Angel.”
I don’t know how long it takes to obey his tender command—only that his arm stays around me and his other hand stays lightly buried in Jayden’s hair.
Contentment tingles in my gut at how perfectly we fit together, the three of us. It’s my last thought before I fall asleep, and my first when I wake hours later.
The sun is climbing, my face pressed to the top of Jayden’s chest, my head tucked under Elijah’s chin. My brain is foggy at first, keeping me in a blissful haze of peppery, citrusy heat. I refuse to move, keeping my breaths even, luxuriating in our closeness and the bliss it weaves around my heart.
I’m drifting back under when a loud, booming knock rattles the door. A chill shoots down my spine as Elijah tenses around me, followed by Jayden’s sudden jolt.
“Get the fuck up, assholes!” A familiar voice booms through the space, into the bedroom, followed by another barrage of hard knocks.
Matheo. I’m going to have words with Christina about her taste in men. I don’t care what his body jewelry says or that his accent is cute. He’s messing with my happy place, and I am not here for it.
“Fuck off,” Jayden groans, nuzzling into the pillow as he shimmies impossibly closer.
“The alarm hasn’t gone off yet,” Elijah grumbles, tightening his hold on me while their legs stay hooked over mine.
“I hate that prick so fucking much,” Jayden mutters as another louder knock echoes through the suite.
This time, Dylan’s voice booms into our peace. “If you’re not out here in ten seconds, we’re leaving without you. Good luck with Coach.”
Elijah peels himself from me, rolling away to check the time. “Shit! My phone is dead.”
“Ten,” Dylan announces.
“You’re not funny,” Jayden growls as Elijah leaps from bed and yanks the duvet off him in one swift tug.
“Nine…” Dylan hollers with another thud.
“Shower,” Elijah orders while Jayden stretches beside me, waking up.
One corner of his mouth quirks up, then the other, before he opens one eye and gives me a sleepy grin. “Morning, Baby.”
“Morning, Hotshot,” I croon back, burrowing into the warm bedding as Elijah yanks him up brusquely.
“Eight, dickheads,” Matheo does the honors.
“It’s almost nine-fucking-AM,” Elijah grunts, stripping out of his boxer briefs on the way to the bathroom. “We’re so damn late!”
Jayden snaps awake. He scoops Elijah’s underwear from the floor and follows him into the bathroom, muttering about Eli leaving his shit everywhere.
“Seven!”