Chapter 15
Elara
Having left the bow and arrows somewhere in the gardens, I made my way through the palace halls. How could I have been so stupid as to agree to an archery competition, knowing full well that I was going to achieve nothing apart from embarrassing myself? Not to mention the knot that seeing Cai and Lady Meredette created in the pit of my stomach. Convincing him to agree to this alliance already carried great difficulty without the additional obstacle of beautiful potential suitors.
I stepped into my chambers and asked Anesta to draw me a hot bath. Slowly, the room filled with steam and the scent of roses and lavender, which she’d added to the hot water.
The archery may not have been a success, but at least Cai had made an attempt to spend some time with me.
I undressed and sank into the bath. Whatever the soaps were made of in Norrandale, they smelled heavenly. Anesta undid my hair while I washed.
“Should I ask about the archery competition?” she enquired, and I shook my head.
“I have single-handedly managed to continue to humiliate myself in front of the King of Norrandale and his courtiers. Of all things, why did it have to be archery?”
“I’m sure King Cai doesn’t care about such simple things.”
“Speaking of which, I must ask your assistance,” I mumbled through the water while washing my face.
“Of course, Your Majesty.”
“Cai has suggested a picnic for us.”
“Oh, how lovely.” She yanked at a knot in my hair from excitement and I cringed.
“I need to find out what Cai’s favourite desserts are so that I can make sure we have them.”
“You don’t know the King’s favourite dessert?” Anesta grinned, still fighting the knot. Her eyebrows lifted as she discovered a small ivy twig in the process.
“We were in the midst of a rebellion the last time we saw each other, so no, there wasn’t really time or opportunity to discuss pastries and cakes.”
“I’ll find out what food His Majesty likes,” she reassured me, smiling in satisfaction as the offending knot untangled painfully.
“Thank you.” I scrubbed my arms. “Anesta?”
“Yes, Your Majesty?”
“Are royal picnics similar to other picnics?”
“What do you mean?”
“Well.” I hesitated. “I’ve never really been on a picnic. Not a proper one, anyway. I have no idea what these people do on such occasions.”
“I don’t think it really differs or that there are any special rules regarding picnics.”
“Really?” I said, unconvinced. “With the kind of fuss they make, I would think they would forbid a king and queen from sitting on the ground.”
“Oh no, you’ll probably have chairs and a table and a tent to keep you out of the sun and servants to dish up the food.”
I gave a grunt of dissatisfaction. “That’s not the kind of picnic I had in mind.”
A loud knock sounded from the outer door before Anesta could reply. I frowned, wondering who it could be.
“I’ll get it.” She stood up and walked out of the bath chamber into the bedroom. I heard Anesta open the door and greet someone.
I tied up my hair and wrapped myself in a warm robe before freezing at the sound of his voice. No, it couldn’t be.
“Ray?” I asked in disbelief, hurrying out of the bathing chamber.
“Lara.”
I blinked twice, making sure what I was seeing was, in fact, real.
“It’s really you,” I cried out, and before I could stop myself, to Anesta’s horror, I ran towards him in my robe.
Ray caught me in his arms, and I let out a laugh of pleasure. “What are you doing here?”
He put me down but held on to my shoulders.
“And where the hell have you been?” I rammed a fist into his chest. “You practically scared me to death.”
“I know, I’m sorry.” His face was tanned from spending time in the sun. He’d grown a beard and his hair was longer. But he was still Ray, all the same. My oldest friend. My partner in crime.
“After our last conversation, I rode through the night into Norrandale to alert the King. I thought maybe if he knew his son’s life was in danger, he would help.”
“You came to Norrandale?”
He nodded. “By the time I got here, I found out the queen was practically on her deathbed, and he’d sent for His Highness.”
I sighed. “But why didn’t you come back? I thought—” I shuddered at the memory — “I thought you were dead.”
“I almost was,” he said. “I took ill on the road and had to take up lodgings in a boarding house while I recovered. Luckily, the lady in charge used to be a healer and could take care of me. When I finally returned to Everness, I heard about you...” He trailed off, not sure what words to use without making the conversation awkward and confrontational.
“If I’d known the truth sooner, things might have gone down differently. Fewer people would have been hurt.” My shoulders sagged.
“I heard you were temporarily in Norrandale, and I couldn’t wait for your return.”
I placed my hand on his arm. “I’m glad you didn’t. It’s really good to see you.”
He shook his head as if in realisation before bowing. “Where are my manners, Your Maj—”
“No, please don’t.” I pulled him upright by the shoulders. “I’m not entirely used to the idea of being queen yet.”
Ray smiled almost in disbelief. “Well, you are such a hooligan, it’s a miracle they haven’t removed you from the throne yet.”
He had intended it as a joke, but it only served to remind me exactly what kind of a mess I was in.
“You’re not far off,” I replied. “Why do you think I’m here?”
Ray’s expression grew solemn.
“I’m here to make an alliance with Cai and Norrandale,” I answered myself.
“You’re not serious?”
I slowly nodded.
“Have you gone mad, Lara? You cannot marry someone you don’t love and spend the rest of your life in misery just because you’re a queen now.”
I wasn’t sure what reaction I’d expected from him, but it certainly wasn’t this kind of outburst.
“Things have changed, Ray. I have changed. If I don’t do this, I risk losing the kingdom’s safety.”
“But...” He searched for the right words. “What about your happiness?”
“It doesn’t matter.” I sat on the bed in dismay. Anesta had quietly busied herself in the corner of the room, trying to be as invisible as possible. “Happiness is for people who don’t have crowns.”
“I’m sorry you’ve had to go through this alone.” He came and sat next to me.
I let out a long sigh. “Ray, I’m going to ask something of you, and you have every right to say no.”
He raised an eyebrow. “All right?”
“I would love for you to stay here with me for a while, but then I need you to go and find Princess Eloisa for me. At first, I thought Lance was keeping her hidden, but apparently she’s disappeared, and you’re the only person I trust for the job.” I glanced up at him hopefully.
“Why? Do you think she could be in trouble?”
“Maybe. And Lance also mentioned she has—”
“What, you’ve been speaking to Lance?”
“Well.” I looked away from his eyes.
“Well?”
“I released him from prison,” I admitted.
“You did what? Lara, have you forgotten what he’s done to you, to Uncle Arthur, to his people?” Ray ignored my title.
“Of course I haven’t,” I retorted. “Lance will always have his own best interests in mind, but right now, I need his help.” I reached for his arm. “Just like I need yours. Will you please help me find Princess Eloisa?”
He sighed and bit his lip. “Why do you always make it so difficult to say no to you?”
My lips curled up into a smile. “It means a lot to me that you’re doing this.”
“Then it would be an honour, my queen.” I felt relief wash over me at finally having my friend back.
* * *
Cai suggested we all have dinner together that evening, even though we’d shared lunch earlier. Though Lady Meredette did finally go home which I had no complaints about. Cai didn’t appear very excited at Ray’s return, but I was grateful that he allowed him to stay at the palace in Norrandale.
“Do I really have to go?” Ray asked when I knocked on his door to share the dinner invitation. “Can’t I just have it in my room or something?”
“The King of Norrandale has requested our presence at his private dinner. It would be very ill-mannered not to go.”
Rhen looked at me like he almost no longer recognised me.
“I don’t want to spend the entire evening in the company of people who think they’re better than me.”
“It’s not like that.” I was quick to come to Cai’s defence. “I’ll be right next to you the whole time and you can tell me all the stories of your travels here and back to Everness.”
Ray didn’t look entirely convinced. I knew this would not be easy for him. Just like me, he’d grown up with very specific beliefs about people in Cai’s position. Something which was not likely to change in one evening over the course of dinner.
“Please.” With matters being as tense as they were, I didn’t want to risk offending Cai or any of the court members. “Just this once and I promise I won’t ask again.”
“You’re asking an awful lot of favours today.” The corner of his mouth turned up in half a grin.
“I know, but I promise I’ll repay you for it. Lots of gold and you can even have your own estate if you want, anything.” Going after Eloisa, with no clear tracks or any clues as to where she might be, would be a very difficult task. But this matter could no longer be left unresolved, and if anyone could do it, it was Ray.
“I don’t want your money, Lara,” he replied softly.
“I know you don’t, but I’ll pay you anyway. I don’t take any of it for granted, I promise.”
When he didn’t respond, I playfully put my hands on my hips. “Now, as your queen, I’m ordering you to be dressed and ready for dinner in an hour.”
When I arrived at the dining room and discovered Ray wasn’t there, I worried he might have bailed on me. Much was my relief when he walked into the room less than a minute later.
I’d never seen Ray in something other than his brown breeches and old linen shirts, but it was clear a servant had helped him pick out something appropriate for the occasion. His black boots were new and recently polished, and the navy jacket fitted him perfectly.
“You clean up nice,” I said in a low voice when he came to stand next to me.
“Why are these shirts so damn uncomfortable?” Ray pulled at the collar.
“I’m afraid it’s something to get used to.”
His eyes took in my dress with the wide skirts and small beads on the bodice and the edges of my sleeves.
“I don’t think I’ll ever get used to seeing you like this.”
“I’m so glad you could join us.” Our heads turned at the sound of Cai’s voice. “It’s good to have you back.” I knew Cai had never been very fond of him, but I appreciated him making an effort to make Ray feel welcome.
“Your Majesty.” Ray cleared his throat and gave an awkward bow.
“Please, there’s no need for such formalities. We’re all amongst friends here.” He gestured to Gwen, Thatcher and Anesta.
Everyone took their seats at the dinner table, and I was about to reach for the chair next to Ray’s when I heard Cai say my name.
He’d pulled out the chair to his left, waiting expectantly for me to take my seat. Even if things did run a little differently in Norrandale, I knew that kings did not pull out chairs for their dinner guests. It was a way of showing me much respect, and I couldn’t help but feel a flutter in my stomach.
“Thank you.” I gave him a warm smile as he stood at the head of the table.
“To friends.” He lifted his glass, and we all toasted with our wine.
The first course was served, and Ray looked at the cutlery with uncertainty. I gently placed my finger on the knife furthest away from the plate. He gave me a grateful smile from across the table.
“So how are you finding Norrandale?” Gwen asked Ray. She sipped on her wine with interest.
“I’ll confess I haven’t seen much of it apart from the main travelling roads, but the palace really is something.”
He looked at all the food as if he were unsure where to start. Ray’s discomfort made me realise how accustomed I’d grown to this lifestyle.
“Cai’s recently had a new library built in the city for all the public to use. It’s the biggest library Norrandale’s ever had.”
I was grateful that Gwen found it so easy to make conversation with strangers. If it were up to me, the whole lot of us would probably be sitting in dreadful silence.
“Though I don’t suppose you read much.” Thatcher spoke up before Ray had a chance to say anything.
I looked up from my plate in slight surprise. Was that supposed to be some kind of insult?
I saw Ray’s jaw clench at the comment. “No, I’m more of an outdoor person.”
“Cai’s the same,” Gwen continued, unbothered by her brother. “If he didn’t have to work in his study, I’m sure we would never find him inside.”
“That’s not true,” Cai countered, with a grin. “I don’t mind sleeping inside.”
“You know what I mean.” She waved him off.
“Cordelia and I were in town the other day, but unfortunately, we never got around to the library. Then again, I’m not much of a reader either.” I made my best attempt at contributing to the small talk.
“Yes, if anyone were planning to punish you, it would take nothing more than forcing you to go through a thick book.”
I met Cai’s eyes and shook my head at his little joke.
“What about you, Lady Anesta?” Gwen turned her interrogation to the next victim. “Are you fond of reading?”
“I don’t mind it.” Anesta shrugged, though I wondered how she ever got around to reading when she had to run after me all day.
“Are you planning on staying here for a while?” Cai asked Ray, who looked like he’d rather be anywhere else in the world.
“Not long, no.” He met my gaze. “My queen has sent me on an important mission.”
“That sounds exciting,” Gwen replied. “What kind of mission?”
Cai looked to me, and his eyes seemed to ask the same question.
“I’ve asked Ray to look for my sister.” My voice came out softer than I would have liked.
Servants entered the dining room and removed our plates, which were quickly replaced with a new dish.
“You mean the rumours are true that the princess is missing?” Gwen’s eyes were wide with intrigue.
“Unfortunately, yes.” I reached for my glass and took a long sip of wine.
“That seems like a very personal mission. You must be very well acquainted with Her Majesty.”
I couldn’t tell who was more peeved by Thatcher’s comment, Cai or Ray. No one responded.
“Please remind me, again, how you and Her Majesty know each other.”
It was enough for Ray to suddenly push out his chair and stand up. “I’m actually quite exhausted from the journey here, if you would be so kind as to excuse me.” He looked towards Cai. “Thank you for the invitation, Your Majesty.”
Cai gave him a curt nod in response, and I watched Ray walk out of the dining room.
“You can’t ask people you don’t know personal questions like that.” Gwen clapped her brother on the shoulder.
“I didn’t realise my question was so personal,” Thatcher defended himself.
“Ray and I have known each other since childhood,” I said, hoping to break the tension and that no further questions would be asked on the subject. Once everyone had finished their dessert, I excused myself from the table and made my way to Ray’s room.
He didn’t answer the door when I knocked, but I heard a distant voice say, “Come in.” When I stepped into the room, Ray was in the midst of packing a small bag. His weapons lay spread out on the bed.
“What are you doing?”
“Leaving. If we want Eloisa to be found, I’d better get on with it.”
I placed my hand on his arm, forcing him to look at me.
“I’m really sorry about dinner. Thatcher didn’t mean to be rude. He’s just a little—”
“It doesn’t matter, Lara.” Ray pulled himself free and shrugged off the borrowed navy jacket. “I’m glad you’ve found somewhere you are comfortable, but I don’t belong among these people.”
His words stung like a cut. That he thought I was here having the time of my life like I couldn’t care less about the things that mattered.
“At least stay the night. You can’t go out in the middle of the night, and you need the rest.”
Ray licked his lips and rubbed his tired eyes. “Fine,” he responded coldly.
This wasn’t the way I wanted us to part.
I took a step back towards the door. “Please come and say goodbye before you leave tomorrow.”
He nodded, looking out his bedroom window.
“Goodnight, Ray.”
The next morning, Ray came to see me before breakfast. It wasn’t a long or dreary goodbye. After last night, it felt as though some kind of rift had been created between the two of us but there was nothing I could do to change it now. We both understood the importance of Ray’s mission. I could only hope he would find Eloisa.
* * *
It was a mission to arrange a private picnic unlike the one Anesta had explained we were likely to get. However, I managed to get my way in the end, with a simple basket and a large blanket suited for the outdoors. I’d also sent Anesta to the kitchens early in the morning with a note, requesting some particular desserts.
Cai’s expression was bright and eager when he greeted me, almost like he’d been looking forward to the event. I leaned back against the trunk of the tree we were sitting under and paged through the book of poetry Thatcher had suggested. Though I wasn’t overly fond of reading, it seemed like a good pastime.
Cai made himself comfortable lying on the blanket with his hands behind his head, listening to each word I read. I took the moments he closed his eyes to study his face secretly while I pretended to search for a new poem. He hadn’t changed much in our time apart and yet there was something different in his expression. A look I couldn’t quite place.
“‘The birdsong added to the pleasantry then, for the lovers were finally together again.’” I closed the book with a small sigh, having had my fill of literature for the day.
“I’ll admit, I quite liked that last poem.” Cai glanced at me from under his lashes. We were alone again. I understood his new title kept him busy with endless duties, but I had a kingdom on the brink of civil war and I still didn’t have a matrimonial agreement. The late morning had been quiet and sunny, a warmth settling over the palace grounds.
“It wasn’t too bad.”
“You didn’t like it?” He frowned, playing with a blade of grass between his fingers.
“It’s not that I didn’t like it. I simply thought it lacking.”
“Lacking?”
“Yes.” I raised my chin. “While it was sweet, I thought it could have been a little more romantic.”
Cai laughed. He actually laughed. “When, dearest Elara, did you turn into a romantic?”
“Who said I wasn’t romantic?”
Well, his expression certainly does.
“I could be romantic.”
“Oh, you could now?”
I shifted my position and Cai decided to sit up. Leaning forwards, I reached for the picnic basket. “I asked the servants to make us some things to eat.”
“How kind of you.” His tone was still teasing.
“I even asked them to make your favourite.” I pulled out a small blueberry tart and held it towards him. Anesta, who performed her duties exceptionally well, had managed to find out that blueberry was, in fact, Cai’s favourite flavour of dessert. It was an effort to keep my hands from shaking. Why was I so nervous?
“How did you know these were my favourite?” He didn’t hesitate to take it.
I shrugged. “I have my ways.”
“Am I hallucinating or are you, Elara, Queen of Everness, trying to flirt with me?”
“A gentleman would just say thank you.”
“Thank you for the blueberry tarts, Elara.” Why did my name sound like that only when he said it?
Cai surprised me by giving me a kiss on the cheek, and then he proceeded to dig into the picnic basket as if it was nothing. I couldn’t help but stare at him. It wasn’t fair. How could he be so calm when it felt as though at any moment my heart was going to jump right out of my chest?
This was dangerous territory. I wanted the alliance to be nothing more than political, believing any kind of feelings between me and Cai would only make the matter so much more complicated. What if I allowed myself to be vulnerable and only ended up getting hurt? What if Cai realised he could never grow to love me again? Would I spend the rest of my days pining after someone who didn’t want me?
I quickly cleared my throat, trying not to appear unnerved. “Do you have many other things to do today?”
“There are still heaps of papers and things that I have to get through on my desk, and then, of course, I need to follow up on the planning of the ball.”
“I thought you were letting Lord Thatcher plan the ball?”
Cai held up one of the blueberry tarts for me to bite into. Tempted as I might have been, my nerves got the better of me and I reached out to take it instead. Cai’s expression remained unchanged.
“If I allow Thatcher to plan a ball on his own, not only will it be too expensive, but the drunken revelry likely to take place would not be appropriate.”
I suppressed a smile. “You and Thatcher are so different. I wonder how you ever became such good friends.” The blueberry tart was deliciously sweet, and I wondered how I had never tasted anything like it before.
“I think circumstance was the main driving force. We grew up together.” He tilted his head to the side. “We used to be much more alike.”
“I remember you told me stories of your younger days together and some of the mischief you got up to.”
“I’m afraid there wasn’t much else for a spoiled young prince and his friend to do.”
“You, spoiled?” I raised an eyebrow, holding back a laugh.
Instead of replying, Cai reached towards me and brushed remnants of blueberry tart away from the corner of my mouth. The air around us turned quiet and I watched with avidity as he brought his thumb to his lips. Cai’s green eyes seemed to smile, studying me.
“Perhaps I was a little spoiled.”
I swallowed harder than intended, suddenly flushed at the intimacy of his action. After pulling out my handkerchief, I dabbed at the corners of my mouth, hoping I look more composed than I felt.
“What about you?” Cai changed the subject.
“What about me?”
“What other matters require your attention today?”
“Nothing,” I confessed. “My only plans were this.” I gestured to where we were sitting.
“Good.” Cai pushed himself back against the wide tree trunk so that we were sitting next to each other, shoulders touching. “Do you have anything else for us to read in that picnic basket?”
“What about all your paperwork?”
“It will still be there tomorrow.”