Chapter 13
13
“ L eo?”
“Hmmm?” He was staring at the TV screen, not really paying me any attention, but I’djust received a text from Travis, the LSU football captain…
“I dare you to come to a team night with me.”
Leo’s eyes widened, and he turned to face me. “Why? I-I’m not part of the team, or?—”
“I dare you to come with me.”
He looked torn. “How many people will be there? What happens at a team night? Where is it?”
I tapped out a reply to Travis, asking who else was going. When my phone buzzed again, I scanned the text.
“Travis doesn’t know exact numbers because he said it depends on who brings friends or partners, but it won’t be the whole team. He says it’s gonna be a quiet one at his house, just gaming and chilling. I thought it could be a good thing. There’ll be enough people there that you won’t feel obligated to make conversation, and it’ll be relaxed, not like a party or anything. What do you think? Are you gonna accept my dare?”
“C-can we leave if it gets too much?”
Pulling him into me, I kissed the side of his head. It was getting far too easy to act like this around him. Half the time, I did it without even thinking—it was like a natural action that just happened. “We can leave whenever you want. You don’t even have to give a reason. Just say the word, and we’ll go.”
His arms came around my waist. He sighed. “Okay. I’ll come.”
So much for it being a quiet one. It seemed like most of the team had shown up at Travis’ house, and nearly everyone had brought someone with them. All the sofas and chairs were occupied, so I lowered myself to the floor in front of the TV, stretching out my legs in front of me. I nodded to Bennett, sprawled out next to me with Niccolò curled up in his lap.
“Alright, Ben?”
“Yeah. Tired. Did you finish the sustainability coursework?”
I shook my head. “Not yet. I think I’m about halfway through. You?”
“I’m almost done with mine, but I could do with another set of eyes on it. Want to read through each other’s work when we’re finished?”
“Yeah, that sounds good.” I meant to continue speaking, but my attention was diverted by Travis calling my best friend’s name.
“Leo! You’re up next!”
My head swung to where Leo was leaning against the wall with JJ, who had apparently been dragged here by Niccolò. They’d been talking in a quiet corner ever since we’d arrived, and I’d been happy to leave Leo to it, knowing he’d message or come and find me if he needed me.
“M-me?” Leo stammered, his cheeks flushing, and I had to fight back the physical urge to go to him and wrap him up and hide him away from the world.
“Yeah, you’re up. It’s you, Niccolò, Liam, and Preston. Winner goes into the next round.” Travis tapped the whiteboard he’d been using to plot out the Mario Kart rounds. We’d been randomly divided into groups of four and were taking turns to play a round. The overall winner would go into the second round, and so on, until everyone was eliminated. There was a crate of beer up for grabs for the winner, although for a group of footballers, it was the thrill of the competition we liked. And the winning, naturally.
Leo’s gaze flew to mine, and I nodded encouragingly. I saw him square his shoulders, and then he moved, crossing the room towards me with his gaze fixed on mine. As he drew near, I saw his eyes darting around, a panicked expression coming over his face, and I instantly realised what had him so stressed.
Widening my legs, I patted the newly created space in between them. It meant that my thighs were pressed against Bennett on one side and against a chair leg on the other, but the minimal discomfort was worth it to see the relieved expression on Leo’s face as he stepped over several pairs of legs and lowered himself down in front of me.
My arms came around him straight away, and his body melted into mine as he exhaled a shaky breath.
“Okay?” I murmured in his ear, and he nodded against me, accepting the controller Travis handed to him. When I glanced up at Travis, he was staring between us with his brows raised. Okay, I knew how this probably looked to him, but it wasn’t like that.
Fuck off , I mouthed discreetly, and he smirked at me before turning his attention to Niccolò, who stared at his controller blankly before asking Bennett how he was supposed to use it. With the attention away from me and Leo, I relaxed a little, pulling Leo closer and tucking my chin over his shoulder so I could see the action on the screen more easily.
“Okay. Rules. I know we went through them before, but I’ll repeat them each time so everyone’s clear about what we’re doing,” Travis said.
“Thanks, Dad!” came Liam’s shout from the sofa behind me, and Travis gave him the finger before continuing.
“50cc race, Mario Kart Stadium. Your choice of vehicle and driver. Next round will be 100cc, so I don’t want to hear any more complaints about these rounds being too slow, Ander .”
“I’m built for speed!” Ander called, and Liam laughed.
“I feel sorry for your boyfriend. If you want any tips about slowing down and making it good for him, I’m happy to advise.”
“Fuck you, Holmes. I feel sorry for Noah, having to be dicked down by a sloth.”
They both dissolved into laughter while Travis rolled his eyes.
“Is this what it’s always like?” Leo whispered to me, and I could hear the amusement in his voice.
“Sometimes, yeah.” Most of the time, probably.
I reached up, brushing aside some of Leo’s hair that was tickling my cheek, and he stiffened.
“I need a haircut.”
“I like your hair. It was just tickling my face. It looks good, though. I love the colour.”
He twisted around to stare at me, his eyes wide. “You do?”
“Yeah, I do.”
“Me too,” came a voice from next to us, and we turned in unison to see Niccolò, the little eavesdropper, smiling brightly at us. “It’s so pretty. I tried to dye mine that colour, but it didn’t turn out like I wanted it.” He pouted, and Bennett was quick to kiss his cheek, instantly wiping his pout away.
“Oh. Um. Thanks.” Leo gave the floor a shy smile and then twisted back around, settling into his original position against my chest. He seriously was so fucking cute.
Brain. Stop .
Thankfully for my brain, the game started up. Leo leaned forwards, intent on the screen as the countdown started. Next to us, Nic had persuaded Bennett to take his turn, Bennett’s arms coming around him to hold the controller, while Nic gave “helpful” advice about mushrooms and shells, but Leo didn’t pay them any attention. It reminded me of when we were gaming together, how wrapped up he could get in a campaign, and it was like the outside world no longer existed.
Leo won the race easily, grinning against me as he sailed across the finish line, almost half a lap ahead of the others.
“What the fuck! How did you manage to get that far ahead?” Liam shouted from behind us, and I laughed. Because Leo was now burrowing into me, doing his best to become invisible, I replied for him, twisting so I could see Liam while I held Leo in place with my arm.
“Sore loser, Liam?”
He smirked at me. “Think you can do better? You’re up next. And you’re up against my boyfriend, who’s the undefeated champion.”
I shrugged. “Can’t make any promises, but I’ll give it my best shot.”
When I turned around again, Leo leaned into me, his head tilting to the side so he could speak into my ear. “Do you want me to move?”
No .
“Nah, you’re good there, if you’re comfortable.”
“Okay.”
Alright, it was a little harder to play when I had to stretch my arms around Leo, and yeah, I didn’t win—the honour went to Noah—but I came a respectable second. Now I was out, I could relax and enjoy Leo. I mean, enjoy my friends, which obviously included Leo.
Leo, who made it through to the final round. It was him against Noah, Travis, and Kira, Travis’ girlfriend, and obviously, I was rooting for my lion. JJ was, too, which meant Niccolò was, and that meant Bennett was cheering him on, too. My face ached from smiling so much, seeing the way people were cheering for my friend, and how he seemed quietly pleased, flushed and biting back small smiles as he kept his gaze fixed on the screen. Tonight had gone so much better than I could have imagined, and I was so happy.
“You’ve got this,” I whispered in Leo’s ear before giving in to my instincts and pressing a quick kiss to his hair. I mean, my mouth was right there, and no one could see what I’d done. From any other angle, it would just look like I was talking to him.
Probably.
Fuck it, the way we conducted our friendship was no one else’s business, as I kept reminding myself.
“Thanks. If I lose, do I get a consolation prize?” he murmured quietly, and I craned my neck to see his face. He looked…amused, almost, and it made me chuckle.
“Course you do. But let’s play to win, okay? Team Hammerking.”
“Ham—oh, I see what you did there. Combining our usernames. Does that mean that you think you should get half the credit if I win?”
“It’s all you, little lion, but I’m still on your team. I’m the support person. It’s a very important role.”
“Yeah.” He smiled again. “Okay. I’ll play to win.”
I couldn’t help ducking my head to press another kiss to his skin, just for luck, you know? That was a thing.
My body tensed when the racers lined up, the teasing and bantering between everyone dying down as the countdown began. Travis and Noah lived together, and Kira was at their house most of the time, so they were all aware of each other’s playing styles. Leo was the wild card. I silently willed him on, watching him pull ahead when the players drifted around the first corner of the track, collecting a mushroom boost and timing its use for its best advantage.
In my ideal world, Leo would be wiping the floor with the others, sweeping ahead and winning the whole thing with ease. Unfortunately for us both, we weren’t in my ideal world, and by the third lap, he was slightly ahead of Noah when a shell took out his character. Noah raced past him, and then it was all over, Leo screeching into second place just ahead of Kira and Travis.
“I tried.” Leo turned to me with a smile. “At least I get a consolation prize.”
The way he was looking at me…I couldn’t really describe it, but it made my heart beat faster. What did he want his consolation prize to be? My mind was running wild with thoughts I shouldn’t be having. Couldn’t even believe I was having.
A pair of legs stopped in front of us. “Good game.”
After a moment’s hesitation, Leo accepted Noah’s outstretched hand. “T-thanks. You were really good.”
Noah gave him a soft smile, his gaze flicking to me. “You too. Hey, Finn. You should bring your boyfriend over again. It’s nice to have some actual competition.”
“Boyfriend?” Leo’s voice was high and panicked.
I rubbed my thumb over his thigh, reassuring him. “We’re friends.”
“Oh. Sorry.” Noah grimaced. “Shit. I’m really sorry. I shouldn’t have assumed…”
“It’s okay.” Believe me, you’re not the first to think there’s something going on between us . I tried to play it off casually because it was no one else’s fucking business. As nice as Noah was, the last thing I wanted was Leo to be stressed and start pulling away from me. “He’s just very cuddly. What can I say?”
“Yeah.” Noah forced a smile, shifting awkwardly on his feet. “Sorry. Again. I, uh, I’m gonna get a drink. Do either of you want one?”
“We’re good, thanks,” I said. If Leo wanted a drink, I’d get him one, but I had the feeling that he wanted to be left alone more than anything else.
I was right. As soon as Noah had gone, his shoulders slumped. “Can we go?”
“Yeah, course we can. We’ll go now.” Everyone was talking among themselves, no one paying us any attention, so now was as good a time as any to leave. As we headed towards the door, I saw JJ watching us, his brows pulled together, but he didn’t make a move towards us. I was grateful for that. One confrontation was enough for the night.
By unspoken agreement, we headed back to Leo’s flat, both of us lost in our own thoughts. Connor’s bedroom door was shut, with a small whiteboard hanging next to it pronouncing that he was doing a Twitch stream and wouldn’t be available for the rest of the night. Even so, Leo shut and locked his bedroom door behind us to ensure we wouldn’t be disturbed.
“S-sorry.” His shoulders hunched over as he stared down at the floor.
There was a heavy weight on my chest. “Leo.”
Shaking his head, he turned his back to me, climbing onto his bed and curling into a ball facing the wall. Fuck.
“Leo.” I climbed onto the bed next to him, leaning over him in an attempt to see his face. “What’s wrong? What do you think you have to be sorry for? Because I can’t think of one single thing.”
“I’m ruining things for you,” he said, and his voice was so small.
What the fuck?
“Ruining what? Baby, please speak to me. I don’t understand.” It barely even registered that I’d called him “baby”—something I’d never called anyone in my life, but it had just slipped out. I was too worried.
“Things. N-Noah thought we were together, and we’re friends, and I’m stopping you from being able to—to get to know people.”
My mind raced. He couldn’t be saying what I thought he was saying, could he?
“Leo. Please, look at me.”
Finally, he turned, and the distraught expression on his face choked me up. It hurt to breathe.
“Leo, I need you to listen to me. Are you saying that you’re stopping me from being able to…y’know, hook up with girls?”
He nodded, his lip trembling. “Yeah. If people think we’re boyfriends, they won’t bother, and?—”
“No.” I placed a finger to his lips, gently tracing the soft curve of his Cupid’s bow. “First of all, I thought we agreed that whether the things we did, like cuddling and whatever might or might not be weird, we didn’t care. Second, think about tonight. I made a space for you, and I was the one to cuddle you…and fuck, to kiss your head or whatever. That was me. Not you. Not like, y’know, I would’ve done it if I thought you were uncomfortable. The point is, that was all me, and I wanted to do it.”
“But what if I’m stopping you from?—”
“Leo. You’re not stopping me from anything. Believe me, if I wanted to go and flirt with girls, I would. Honestly, though, I’d rather hang out with you over anyone else.”
His eyes widened. “But what about y-your needs?” His cheeks flushed redder than I’d ever seen them before, and then he covered his face with his hands. “This is so embarrassing,” he mumbled from behind his palms.
“My needs?” I couldn’t help smiling. “I have a working right hand.”
He groaned. “Finnnn.”
“Leooo.”
Removing his hands, he glared at me, and it was so much better than him being upset that I had to work to bite back my smile. “Even if I don’t feel things the same way as you do, I’m not stupid. We’re spending all our free time together, and when we’re around people, they apparently think we’re boyfriends. So. I’m ruining things for you.”
Okay. He needed me to spell it out for him. I manoeuvred him so he was lying flat on his back, and then I propped myself up on my side, cupping his jaw.
“Leo. You’re my favourite person in the world. You know that, right?” Fucking hell, this was hard to say. “Sex…yeah, it’s fun, but I’ve never had a high sex drive or anything. Not like, uh, Ander or JJ or someone. I mean, before they were coupled up. I don’t wanna think about their sex lives with their boyfriends.”
Shaking my head, I tried to get my thoughts back on track. I had to get these words out, to make him understand. “Honestly,” I continued, “I can take it or leave it. It’s fucking weird for me to be telling you all this, but I’m gonna say it because you need to hear it. You are the person I want to spend time with the most. I have everything I need, and for anything else, I have my hand and an active imagination.”
He bit down on his lip, and I couldn’t help leaning forwards to press a kiss to the freckles on the tip of his nose. If he needed even more reassurance, I’d give it to him.
“If there was someone I was interested in, and right now, there isn’t, this wouldn’t stop me, so you don’t even need to worry about that. You’re not an obstacle in the way. You’re…Leo. My Leo.”
“Oh.”
“Is that all you have to say?” My brows rose, and this time, I didn’t hide my smile. “I just said all that embarrassing shit to you, and you give me a one-word reply?”
“Shut up,” he mumbled, glaring again, and he really was so fucking cute.
“Leoooo.”
“Fine. I guess I’ll try to believe you. But…will you tell me if I’m too much? Or if…if you want to stop doing what we’ve been doing?”
I rolled onto my back, pulling him with me. Wrapping my arms around him, I pressed a kiss to his head and then another. Just to emphasise my point. “I’ll tell you, but it won’t happen. I’m not giving this up for anything and anyone.”
He sighed, pressing his face into my throat. A second later, he brushed a soft kiss over my skin.
“Thank you. Sorry I’m…me.”
Running a hand up his back and into his hair, I tugged the strands lightly. “Don’t ever say that again. You’re the best person I know. Now, how about that consolation prize I promised you?”
His head rose, and his eyes met mine, wide and so fucking green. “What’s the prize?”
“What do you want?”
He stilled above me, and I could feel his heart pounding just as hard as mine was.
Then, he lowered his head, and our lips met.