Chapter 18
18
“ L eo,” I mumbled against his lips. “Leo.”
“Mmm?” He blinked down at me, all flushed cheeks, blown pupils, and kiss-swollen lips. Fucking gorgeous.
“We should stop.”
His body froze, hurt flashing in his gaze. Without a word, he rolled off me, onto his side, facing the wall.
“Fuck. No. That’s not what I meant.” Collapsing onto my back, I rubbed my hand over my face, attempting to gather myself. When I’d managed to catch my breath and my dick was no longer threatening to punch a hole through my joggers, I shifted onto my side, pressing my chest up against Leo’s back, although I kept my hips angled away from him. I didn’t trust my dick to behave, and holy fuck, Leo Evans made my dick hard. Okay, maybe I’d known that for a while, but it was something I’d been hoping would go away. Leo was my best friend, and the only reason we’d even started this whole kissing thing in the first place was to help him practise. And okay, maybe now we just kissed because we both liked it or whatever, but?—
A tiny whimper came from Leo, and I reacted instantly, gripping his arm and turning him onto his back. He covered his face with his hands, his knees drawn up, and he looked so vulnerable. I couldn’t stand it. I had to make this right.
“Leo. Baby. Look at me.”
He shook his head violently. Propping myself up on one elbow, I leaned down to kiss the back of his hand.
“Please.”
Another head shake. I sighed.
“I didn’t want to stop. I just—I was worried you— we were getting carried away. Y’know, with, uh, you know.” Fuck me, this was a hard conversation to have.
“You really didn’t want to stop?” His voice came out muffled, but I heard the uncertainty in his tone.
“Really. I think you could tell I was into it.”
Slowly, he lowered his hands. He still wouldn’t look at me, but it was a start. “I was into it, too, so I don’t understand.”
Fuck. He sounded so confused and hurt. I was really going to have to spell it out, wasn’t I? “Leo. We were grinding on each other. Kissing is one thing, but we’ve never discussed taking it further, and I didn’t want to get carried away and have you regret it, you know?” My face was on fire . Believe me, this was not a discussion I’d ever envisioned.
I could practically see the wheels turning in his head. There was a moment where he paused, and then… Swiping his tongue across his lips, he met my gaze directly, his eyes widening, and the last thing I expected happened.
He lowered his legs, arched a brow, and said, “Are you saying you wouldn’t have regretted it?”
“Uh—well—uh—no. No, I wouldn’t.”
“Neither would I.” Lifting his hand, he cupped my cheek. I could feel the tremble in his fingers, but my brave fucking lion held my gaze and continued. “You know we’ve spoken about how I’ve never really wanted to kiss anyone before, except maybe the girl at school I told you about. But I like kissing you, and what we were doing just now…” His voice trailed off, and this time, he dropped his gaze.
I brought my hand up to curl around his, the one that was still cupping my cheek, still trembling against my skin. “What we were doing just now…?”
“I liked that, too. A lot. And I didn’t want to stop. I’ve never…I’ve, um, obviously touched myself, but it’s never felt like that .”
“So.” I exhaled shakily. “Wanna carry on?”
“Yes, if you want to,” he whispered, hesitating for a second until I nodded, and then he pulled me down to him.
“Tell me if you want to stop anytime, and we can,” I murmured against his lips, and his hum of agreement was swallowed by my mouth. I kissed him slow and deep, losing myself in the slide of his mouth against mine. What exactly was going to happen next, I had no clue. I was completely out of my depth here, but as usual, being like this with Leo felt…right. Despite the fact I was theoretically straight. Probably. Maybe. It was something I could think about later or never. Who cared right now when what we were doing felt this good?
My hands went to his hips, and I pulled him on top of me. He gasped, and then suddenly, the kiss wasn’t slow and deep and soft. It was hard, and messy, and really fucking hot, with Leo rolling his hips down in a way that made my dick throb. Leo was just as hard against me, panting against my mouth as I dared to slide my hands lower onto the curve of his ass.
He ground down harder, a breathy moan falling from his lips, and bloody hell, I was gonna make a serious mess of my joggers because it was so. Fucking. Hot. I palmed his firm ass, breaking our kiss so I could get at his jaw, dragging my teeth over the smooth skin.
“Finn. I think—I think I—I’m close. Can you touch me? Please?” His voice was wrecked, and the small “please” at the end did me in. As if I could ever refuse him anything. I rolled us to the side, getting my hand down inside his tented joggers, and then I was touching another man’s dick for the first time in my life.
A dick that belonged to Leo.
Leo, who had his head thrown back, his eyes closed, and moans and pants falling from his mouth. Leo. Who wanted me to touch him. To be the first person to get to do this to him.
Fuck.
I stroked my hand down his length, hot and hard in my grip. When I stroked back up, I ran my thumb over the tip of his erection, smooth where his foreskin had retracted to expose the sensitive head, wet with precum. He gasped, then shuddered, and then his cock pulsed in my grip, stripes of cum shooting over my hand and the inside of his joggers. It was messy, and I was completely uncoordinated, but it was so fucking hot that all I needed to do was rub over my joggers with my free hand, and I was coming, too, my body curling forwards as my release hit me.
Our heavy breaths seemed abnormally loud in the ensuing silence. I wasn’t sure what to do. My hand was kind of covered in Leo’s cum—oh, and it was still inside his joggers, just casually resting against his spent cock. And there was the small matter of the uncomfortable wetness in my own joggers.
Totally worth it, though.
Leo broke the silence with a small huff of breathless laughter. “That was messier than I thought it would be.”
“Yeah. We should plan it better next time.” My eyes widened as I realised what I’d just implied. “Uh, if there’s a next time.”
I glanced over at him to find him smiling up at the ceiling, his eyes half-lidded and sleepy. “Oh, yeah. Next time.”
Okay. Good. We could discuss that later. First, we needed to get cleaned up. Withdrawing my hand from Leo’s joggers, accidentally smearing his release everywhere in the process, I grimaced.
“Shower? You can go first if you want. I’ll get us some clean clothes.”
He yawned as he nodded slowly. I had a sudden, overpowering urge to wrap him up and cuddle him until he fell asleep, which didn’t even surprise me at this point. I’d just had my hand on his dick. Of course I was going to want to take care of him afterwards. But I resisted. First, shower and fresh clothes, then food, then sleep.
I froze in place as it hit me all over again. Fucking hell. I’d had my hand on Leo’s dick.
Okay. I could panic about that later. I had more important priorities for now.
After we’d showered and changed and the food was on its way, both of us were feeling more awake, sprawled out over my bed and scrolling through Netflix as we tried to agree on something to watch while we ate. I grabbed our phones, handing Leo his and switching mine on. We’d both turned them off this morning, not wanting the real world to invade our planned gaming day.
As soon as my phone loaded up, it began buzzing, and next to me, Leo’s was doing the same. I thumbed through my apps, reading the messages I’d received.
CHARLIE:
Are you ok? What happened last night?
Before I forget. See if Leo wants to come to your match on Sunday. We need to boost the supporter numbers!
You don’t have to tell me what happened last night but let me know if you’re ok
BENNETT:
LOOK WHAT LEO DID. THIS IS ALL HIS FAULT
There was a picture of Niccolò beaming and pointing at a TV screen, where Mario Kart was showing the podium awards. I laughed, thrusting my phone at Leo.
“Look. You’re being blamed for this.”
Leo grinned, shaking his head. “I only showed Nic what the buttons did and gave him a few tips. Maybe Bennett’s not as good at the game as he thinks.”
The fact he was happily joining in with the teasing, and teasing right back, made me warm all over.
ME:
Leo says you’re just shit at Mario Kart
“Finn!” Leo screeched, trying to wrestle my phone out of my grip, but it was too late because I’d already hit Send. Laughing, I tussled with him for a couple of minutes until we somehow ended up with my hands buried in his soft hair, holding his face still while I kissed him.
With a groan, I pulled away, picking up my phone from where it had been discarded on the bed. I needed to stop getting carried away. Leo seemed to be of the same mind, straightening up and taking several deep breaths.
I tapped out another reply to Bennett, letting Leo see my screen.
ME:
JK. He doesn’t think that. I say you’re shit though
Bennett replied with a middle finger emoji, and I grinned, sending him a kissing face before I returned to my message thread with Charlie.
ME:
I’m good. All ok here, thanks for checking up on me. I’ll ask Leo if he’ll come to the match
“Leo?”
“Yeah?” He was staring down at his phone screen with that sweet, shy smile that was becoming one of my favourites.
“Do you wanna come to our match on Sunday? It’s an away game. Charlie’s asking.”
He glanced over at me, his sweet smile disappearing. “Do…do you want me to come?”
“What? Of course I do!” Why would he ever think that I wouldn’t want him there?
His lashes lowered. “Oh, okay. It’s just…you didn’t invite me, so I wasn’t sure. I don’t want to be a distraction or anything.”
“Leo. No. You have an open invite to every single one of my future games, okay? And my practices. I would be over the fucking moon if you came. I just didn’t want to put you in a situation where you felt like you had to say yes. I don’t want you to be uncomfortable. The games are a lot more full-on than our training sessions.” I shifted closer to him, placing my hand on his thigh. “I just want you to be happy.”
His mouth fell open. “Oh.”
“Why are you so surprised by this?” Without waiting for him to reply, because I knew this whole conversation was awkward for both of us, I continued talking. “Speaking of surprised, who texted you? I’m sure your phone vibrated more times than mine.”
“JJ, and…Nic?” His voice lifted in a question, and my brows rose. Wordlessly, he handed me his phone, open to his messages.
JJ:
Hope you’re ok babe. If Finn isn’t looking after you say the word and I’ll come straight over
You know I’ll come over anytime. Here for you
You’re strong and I know you can handle anything
I saw that he’d replied to JJ, telling him he was fine and not to worry. Beneath JJ’s messages, there was a thread from an unknown number.
UNKNOWN:
Hope you don’t mind I got your number from JJ
Are you ok? I’m good at keeping secrets if you want to talk
Especially sex related things
Did I say I have a FanBoyzOnly account?
The only reason I mentioned that was because it means I’m confident discussing things
I’m not bragging
I couldn’t help laughing at what were clearly Niccolò’s messages.
UNKNOWN:
Bennett said I should unsend these messages but I don’t know how
Sorry. All I wanted to say was that I hope you’re ok and you can talk to me anytime because we’re friends
There was a short break in the message time stamps, followed by a couple more.
UNKNOWN:
It’s Nic BTW in case you didn’t work it out! I owe you!
Look at this!
Those messages were followed by the same picture Bennett had sent me.
“Nic,” I said, and Leo nodded, that cute little smile appearing on his face again as he took his phone back and replied after adding Nic to his contacts. I looked away, not wanting to invade his privacy.
My phone beeped, letting me know our delivery was due to arrive, and so I jogged downstairs, throwing open the front door and surprising the girl standing on the driveway with her hand raised to the doorbell.
I relieved her of the bags of food, setting everything up on the kitchen table since I didn’t have the space in my bedroom. When I called Leo and he came downstairs, I watched him carefully as he opened the individual cardboard boxes, waiting for the moment he realised?—
“Finn!”
“Yeah?” Leaning back against the counter, I raised a brow.
“You got pizza?” He stared down into the open box, his eyes wide and so fucking green.
“Yeah. I knew you wanted it, so I ordered from the place that does pizza and chicken. See, I can compromise?—”
He launched himself at me, and I automatically wrapped my arms around him, holding him in place.
“Best, best friend,” he mumbled into my throat, and I grinned. When he lifted his head, I pressed a quick kiss to his nose, right over his smattering of freckles, and then handed him a plate.
“Help yourself before it gets cold.”
With a bright smile, he did.